


axis mundi

by anax imperator (anax)



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Genre: Domestic Violence, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-17
Updated: 2017-03-15
Packaged: 2017-12-08 18:26:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 17
Words: 131,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/764576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anax/pseuds/anax%20imperator
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rufus Shinra grows up, and isn't allowed to die in peace.</p><p>I don't claim this to be anything groundbreaking, but it's what I'm writing.</p><p>Many of the events are adapted from Before Crisis, but that plot is not followed precisely.  There is more fidelity to the events of The Original Game, in terms of plot but maybe not in terms of dialogue.</p><p>We've reached Advent Children, which will be followed closely, although I will be adjusting dialogue.  So you already know how this ends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Midgar

**Author's Note:**

> Content warning for domestic violence.

It's stress. That's what everyone tells him.

His mother is the first one, and the one who most consistently extends this explanation. She comes into his bedroom, after Rufus has cried for a while, and says soothing things to him. He clings to her, burying his face in her dress, and cries again.

"Darling," she says, smoothing down his hair, "it's okay. He doesn't mean it. He loves you. He's just under a lot of stress right now. Shhhh, it's okay. Don't cry."

Rufus doesn't understand what she's saying; he's not quite five years old. He doesn't know what _stress_ is, only that his father has frightened him, and it isn't the first time. He doesn't even know what he did to make his father so angry. He was excited, chattering about the trip to the zoo that he and his mother had taken that day, eager to share his excitement with his father.

But instead of smiling with him, his father had exploded with rage, telling Rufus to _Shut up, shut_ up, _you worthless little shit, aren't you_ ever _quiet,_ and now Rufus sobs into his mother's embrace.

After a time, she pushes him gently back, making him sit up straight on the bed. "He loves you," she tells Rufus again, and wipes his face clean of salt. "Always remember that. He doesn't mean to yell at you."

Later, Rufus's father speaks gently to him, too, and asks him about the trip to the zoo and the exotic animals he saw there. Rufus is unable to recapture most of his earlier excitement, but is able to describe the trip. His father smiles and tousles his hair, and tells Rufus, "I love you."

"I love you, too," says Rufus, with his child's lisp.

* * *

By the time Rufus is eight, he has learned to keep his voice low when his father is around. That doesn't always help, because things sometimes set the man off that Rufus can't predict ahead of time, but being loud and excited is guaranteed to trigger an explosion. Rufus is never loud and excited when his father is home.

He has a tutor now, and his father asks him about his lessons at dinner every evening. Rufus is very interested in science, but after the first few animated descriptions of his science lessons his father begins to express disapproval. "You don't need to know that kind of nonsense," says the man. "We have a whole department for that."

Rufus is sensitive to his father's moods, and after that he no longer brings up the topic. The lessons still excite him, but he keeps his excitement to himself. He does not describe looking through a microscope at a drop of water, and all of the bizarre squirming life hidden in the drop. He does recount it when his tutor explains that the sun does not actually rise and cross the sky at all, but the planet itself instead spins and makes it appear that way, but he keeps the detail minimal, just a flat description of the lesson. As for the elation he feels at understanding this profound fact, he keeps that concealed and does not share it.

There is an entire universe of knowledge out there, and Rufus can feel himself on the fringes of it, barely brushing the edge. Every time his tutor gives him a new morsel of information about the way the world works, he devours it and finds that he wants more. He wants to know everything; he wants to _understand_ everything. His tutor shows him a picture book full of fishes and sea life, and tells him that one of the fishes is not a fish at all but a _mammal,_ like a cow or a person. Rufus is fascinated, and wants to know it all: what is a _mammal,_ why does such a creature mimic a fish, why does it live in the sea instead of on land, can we go see one? He is shown that if common alcohol is poured into water, one cup of each turns into _less_ than two cups of the combination, and wants to know _why,_ and what is a _molecule,_ and how does _chemistry_ work.

But his father is not interested in such things, and Rufus knows that he does not want Rufus to be interested, either. His father wants Rufus to learn boring things, like math. Rufus's tutor forces him to learn math anyway, but it is dry, uncreative, a dead thing on paper. It is the structure of the world that fires his imagination.

One day, there is one of those unpredictable explosions: Rufus is describing his lessons in as little detail as he can (so that his father will not discover about the bean-vine-growing experiment that he and his tutor started today), and his father suddenly turns red and slams his fists on the table. "Are you an idiot or something?" he demands, and then he stands up and slams the table again. "What the hell is _wrong_ with you? Are you stupid?"

Rufus has no idea why his father would think that, but the sudden rage frightens him and he begins to stammer incoherently. His father rises, and so does Rufus's mother, moving in between the two of them, but his father just throws her aside and a moment later is towering over Rufus.

_"Are you broken in the head?"_ his father screams, and he grabs Rufus by the arm and starts to shake him. "Do you know how much I'm paying for that tutor of yours? _Do you?"_

Rufus does not, and tears are rising in his eyes; the grip on his arm is bruising, and his arm and shoulder are being yanked painfully back and forth. "I-I-I-I ..." is all he can say. His mother is clinging to his father's arm, her voice raised, trying to pull him away, but his father just shakes harder.

"What am I spending all that money on? You're not learning a _Gaiadamned thing!"_ There is probably more to that thought, but Rufus interrupts by starting to cry. He watches with horror as his tears cause his father go momentarily crazed with fury; a moment later he is on the floor, with his ears ringing and the side of his face numb. "Stop _crying,"_ his father is yelling. "You're like a Gaiadamned _baby!"_

Rufus's mother finally gets his father dragged away, and he turns on her. "This is _your_ fault!" the man screams, as Rufus lays on the floor, stunned and trying to pull himself together. "You're good for nothing, and so is he!" She pleads with him, and he strikes her as well but maybe not as hard.

"Stop it," she cries, and her voice is shaking. "Please, don't take it out on him! We'll just fire Reynolds and find someone else ..."

"That won't help if he doesn't _learn,"_ says his father, and he strikes Rufus's mother again. "He has to _learn._ I can't have a blubbering idiot for a son!"

"He does the best he can! Please, stop, please calm down ..."

_"I am calm!"_

Rufus is kept inside for the next two weeks and away from visitors, while the dark bruise on his face heals. Every time his father catches sight of him, the man starts to look angry, so Rufus keeps away as much as possible.

When Rufus goes to his mother for comfort, she provides it. "Don't be too hard on him," his mother tells him, her voice low and gentle. "He's under a lot of pressure right now. You don't really know what's going on with the company. If you did, you'd understand. He works very hard to give us the life we have." She strokes his hair, and adds, "You shouldn't cry in front of him, Rufus. It just makes him angry."

It's only when the mark on his face is gone that his father corners him, sits down with him, and his father's voice, too, is now gentle. "Rufus," he says, "you're going to run the company some day. You'll need to know things. You'll have to be able to understand what people are saying to you when they report to you. You'll have to know enough to tell when they're lying to you and when they're telling you the truth. There will be some things you need to keep to yourself, so you have to be able to run the numbers and figure things out on your own."

"Yes, father," says Rufus, because there's nothing else for him to say.

"Your mother and I are going to send you to a school," his father says. "You'll learn the things you need to know there. You're going to have to work very hard, and be very smart. You have to make me proud."

"Yes, father. I'll make you proud."

His father kisses him on the head, and smiles at him. "I know you will."

* * *

The bean-growing experiment is never completed; the plants die in their boxes, un-cared-for. Rufus never sees his tutor again.

The school is located in the countryside outside Midgar, and Rufus stays there during the week, coming home on the weekends. The school teaches him math, reading and literature, economics, and history. There are no microscopes to examine the hidden world of miniature life, and no telescopes to behold the splendor of the heavens.

There are other boys, however, and there are Turks. The Turks come with Rufus - two of them at first, and later, when the school is deemed secure, just one at a time. A Turk accompanies Rufus to the school, stays there with him all week, and returns with him for the weekend; the next week, a different Turk does the same. They are omnipresent, always somewhere in the background wherever Rufus goes. They call him _sir._

It is perhaps the Turks who keep the other boys at bay the first few days, prevent them from even attempting to hold a conversation with Rufus, but it is Rufus who keeps them at bay after that. The first child to hazard an approach to the President's son is met with silence, as Rufus has no experience with other children and has no idea how to make friends or even why he would want them. The second child meets the same wall. After that, no one attempts to talk to Rufus. They merely talk about him behind his back, and make sure he can hear whenever they can manage it.

It's Tseng - seventeen years old, too fresh on the job to know what is Turk business and what isn't - who brings up this problem with Veld. "He doesn't have any friends at school," Tseng reports. "The only time the other kids interact with him at all is when they tease him."

Veld hears him out as Tseng describes Rufus's isolation at school, and then says, "There's nothing we can do."

"Director, surely there's ..."

Veld raises a hand to cut him off. "You can't force the other boys to make friends with him. How would you even try?"

Tseng hadn't really thought that far before coming to his boss. "Maybe ... maybe President Shinra ..."

Again, Veld cuts him off. "The President would not want to be bothered with something like this. I suggest you do not bring it up with him."

Tseng doesn't. Rufus endures the snide comments made around him, never _at_ him, but always just within earshot. No one does anything. Tseng, however, tries to talk with Rufus during the drives to and from school. Sometimes Rufus will talk, and sometimes Tseng is met with complete silence.

When Rufus goes home each weekend, he is required to describe the week's lessons to his father, who sometimes listens with apparent approval, and who at other times becomes furious for reasons Rufus never quite understands. He does not strike Rufus on the face again, but hard shakes are frequent when he's in a poor mood. The violence is accompanied by shouted insults, _little shit, waste of money, idiot, wish you'd never been born,_ and it leaves behind ugly marks on Rufus's arms. He wears long-sleeved shirts to hide them.

Rufus's mother is again the one to console him, although Rufus is learning not to cry, and again it is the stress that she emphasizes. "There are a lot of things going on right now," she tells Rufus. "Just ... just don't do anything to make him angry. All right?"

Sometimes Rufus's father is angry at _her_ instead. Sometimes Rufus is wakened late in the evening by the sounds of shouting elsewhere in the house. He is sure that it is about something _he_ has done, and he tries very hard to be calm and obedient, and to keep his voice low around his father. Often it works, and his father is full of smiles and affection. Occasionally it doesn't.

At the end of the term Rufus's grades are sent home, and Rufus expects his father to be pleased. His father, however, is not pleased. "What the hell is this?" the man yells, showing Rufus the single A-minus on his transcript. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Please," says Rufus's mother. "He did so well ..."

This earns her a glare. "There are no prizes for second place." The glare is turned on Rufus. "Do you hear me? Second place is a _loss,_ and it makes you a _loser."_

"But ..." Rufus is about to defend himself. He did not place second; nobody else got grades better than his! "I'm not ..."

His attempt is cut short by the dark clouds that cross his father's face in an instant. "Are you _talking back to me?"_ his father screams, and then without waiting for an answer he strips Rufus's pants off and whips him viciously with his belt. Rufus also screams, but with pain, and he cries, and his father beats him harder for crying.

"No son of mine _cries,"_ his father tells him, "and no son of mine gets an A-minus." Rufus's mother cries, though, sitting off to one side and sobbing because she can't stop what's happening.

When his father is finished, his backside is covered in sticky blood, and his father gives him a few final lashes for having ruined the belt by bleeding on it.

Tseng finds out the next day, when he collects Rufus to take him back to school; Rufus can't sit down in the car. In the back of the limo, Tseng gets the story out of him, slowly and in pieces, because Rufus doesn't want to talk about it at first. Afterward he lays on his belly across one of the seats in silence while the order of the world rearranges itself within Tseng's mind.

The following weekend, Tseng takes Rufus back home. Tseng meets again with Veld, who confirms that President Shinra can be short-tempered, but reaffirms that this is not Turk business. He looks out his office window while he says it, and Tseng knows that he would do something if he could.

At the same moment, President Shinra is sitting with his son in his bedroom, explaining that he was simply shocked to see the less-than-perfect grade on Rufus's transcript and lost control for a minute. "You have to be the best at everything," he tells Rufus. "I just want you to be the best you can be."

"Yes, father," says Rufus, uncomfortable, still in pain when he sits, and terrified of saying the wrong thing. Even hard work, it seems, might trigger his father's fury.

His father kisses him on the head, and says, "Come on. I bought you something and I want you to see it."

He takes Rufus outside Midgar. It's Rufus's first trip in a helicopter. When he realizes that they're going by chopper, Rufus becomes excited, but he quickly remembers himself and crushes his excitement before it can show. He presses his face against the glass of the window as they fly, marveling at how far away the ground is, how perfect and smooth.

They land near a stable, painted clean red-and-white and surrounded by fields with white fences. Rufus's father meets with a man dressed in tidy jeans and unmarked boots, with wild white hair under a straw hat, while Rufus stands near the chopper with Tseng. Then they go around the stable and into the paddock to see Rufus's present.

The chocobo is taller at the hip than Rufus is altogether; her feathers are down-soft and deep gold. She lowers her head to inspect him, and then opens her mouth and feels Rufus's shoulder with her beak and tongue. Despite the power in that beak she is gentle, and only explores and does not bite, but Rufus is alarmed and doesn't want to show it, so he stands stock-still. The barn manager guffaws and gives Rufus some greens to feed to the bird, and within a few minutes Rufus is stroking the animal's neck, charmed by her coos and the way she rubs her face against his arm. The chocobo is trusting, and free with her affection.

"She likes you," says the barn manager, and Rufus turns shining eyes to his father.

"She's really mine?" he asks.

"Yes." Rufus's father smiles, full of generosity. "Bring that grade up and you'll get riding lessons."

The chocobo is registered under the name Seven Sails (by Seven League Boots, out of Smooth Sailing), but Rufus names her Sunny. The barn staff follow his lead.

The next two weekends Rufus asks to visit his chocobo, and his father gets the Turks to arrange for a helicopter each time. The weekend after that his father is irritable again, finding fault in Rufus's table manners, so Rufus doesn't ask to see the chocobo for fear that the request might trigger his father's anger. The weekend following that one his father is still touchy, so Rufus again does not bother him with wanting to see a bird.

However, his father falls into another rage at the end of the day, calling Rufus an ungrateful wretch who obviously doesn't appreciate a valuable present since he hadn't so much as asked after the chocobo in two weeks. Rufus tries to explain himself, and is again punished with the belt for talking back.

His father threatens to have the chocobo butchered and served up for dinner. Rufus, half naked and already bloodied, bursts into tears and his father flies into a blind rage. Rufus is beaten raw and locked into his bedroom for the rest of the evening. He falls asleep sobbing into his pillow, his backside throbbing.

The next morning his father gently explains that he expected Rufus to take an interest in the bird, which has the finest bloodlines and is a daughter of champions. It had been a very expensive purchase, and it hurt him when Rufus didn't even ask after the chocobo for two weeks. He does not actually say he's sorry for what he did or the things he said, but he does say that he should not have lost control.

It's almost like an apology, and Rufus takes it as such. He forgives his father, and says that he would very much like to see his chocobo. The Turks take him that same afternoon; the chocobo is alive and un-butchered, and Rufus buries his face in the animal's warm feathers.

Rufus works hard, and the term ends with no A-minuses on his transcript. His father glows and praises him, and Rufus basks in his approval. The next weekend, when he comes home, arrangements have been made for riding lessons. One lesson a week, at first, but Rufus soon successfully begs for two, one on each weekend day. He enjoys the activity and exercise, and the time he spends with his chocobo; he needs to stand on a block to mount because she's so tall, but the animal warks when she sees him and scratches at the paddock to reach him. She never finds any fault in him. Rufus feels loved, unreservedly.

The lessons get him out of the house.

It is at this time that Veld decides to put Tseng with Rufus as much as possible. He is the youngest Turk, closer to Rufus in age than anyone else in the department, and Veld thinks that Rufus gets along best with Tseng. Veld does not consult anyone else in this decision or bring it up with Tseng; no one can object to or overrule a decision they don't know has been made.

* * *

When Rufus turns ten, his father moves the family from their house on the edge of the Sector Three plate to a suite within the Shinra Tower. "It's time you start learning how the company works," his father tells him. Rufus is removed from school, and a new tutor is hired. He is excited at first (although he hides it), because he thinks that maybe the science lessons will now resume, but that doesn't happen. The new tutor sticks to the same subjects as the school.

The riding lessons continue, although the days change; instead of Saturday and Sunday, they now take place on Saturday and Wednesday. Rufus and Sunny are learning dressage, with Sunny getting lessons from the trainer separately from Rufus. She is becoming a powerful bird, both fast and controlled, and Rufus is never happier than when he's on her back. Veld is also ordered to start Rufus on some firearms training. He assigns this to Tseng. Rufus is too young to control a pistol, so Tseng starts him first on a small rifle.

On Mondays Rufus is escorted around the building, shadowing different executives and visiting different departments, and Tseng is his near-constant companion. Rufus talks to Tseng more than he used to, asking him things, seeking his good opinion; Tseng is always there, after all, and always knows what Rufus has seen and heard, so Rufus can always talk to him without having to explain anything first.

The department visits are generally intimidating. The staff are uncomfortable with the President's son, not knowing how much will be reported back to the President, and the department heads think that explaining their business to a ten-year-old is humiliating. Rufus comes to generally dread Mondays. It is only the Space Research Department that proves interesting to Rufus, lighting his latent love of science. The actual Science Department, on the other hand, disturbs him. The head of the department, Hojo, looks at Rufus the way Rufus once looked through a microscope at hydra and amoebae, and speaks to Rufus as though he is too stupid to understand simple words.

Rufus also visits the Department of Administrative Research, and finds it to be unexpectedly full of Turks. Rufus has never really thought before about where the Turks come from, and is shocked to discover that they have a series of offices just like all the other company divisions. He knows all the Turks of course, but they are more relaxed here in their home territory. They are polite and welcoming, and more than pleased to show Rufus everything. They answer his questions without making him feel as though he is a waste of time. One of the women feeds him her home-cooked lunch. They all call him _sir,_ just as they do when escorting him, but the word is used with a warmer tone.

When Rufus leaves he is happy, but he does not understand why, because he has never had friends.

Rufus is careful when he reports this department visit to his father, fearing that his enjoyment will mean that he will be forbidden from ever returning. Unexpectedly, his father is pleased by his rapport with the Turks. "Maybe I'll make you a Vice President over the department," his father tells him. He intends it as a jest, but Rufus does not realize this and thinks it is a serious statement.

The next day, during his shooting lesson with Tseng, he mentions what his father said, and because he believes it to be serious Tseng does as well. Tseng, in turn, brings up the possibility with Veld. Veld thanks Tseng for the information and says nothing else about it, and thinks to himself about what it might mean if that were to actually occur.

In the Shinra Tower, people sometimes talk about a war that has recently started. The talk is always distant, the war something that happens somewhere else, to other people. Several departments are involved in designing weapons and training SOLDIERs, but the weapons and SOLDIERs are sent elsewhere to be used, overseas, far away. This war is not a very interesting thing to Rufus, and he tends to just ignore it.

* * *

Rufus's parents start to bring him along to social and political functions. For the most part these are dinners, frequently held in the Tower but sometimes elsewhere, where many people make long speeches and talk about things Rufus neither cares about nor fully understands. They usually take place late in the evening, and Rufus falls asleep at the first one; his father is incensed when they get home, because _everyone_ could see the Shinra heir napping inelegantly at the head table and it humiliated him. His father shouts, and Rufus is shaken and flung to the floor. His parents continue to argue about it after Rufus flees the room.

Later, his mother comes to his bedroom to talk to him; she, too, has marks darkening on her arm. "You have to remember who you are," she tells him. "You're Rufus Shinra. One day you'll be the wealthiest man on the planet, and these people will be coming to _you_ for money. You must be presentable to them."

"I'm sorry, mother," says Rufus. He hadn't known, and the food had been good, and that and the late hour had made him so sleepy.

"Your father wants what's best for you, what's best for _us._ You must behave like a gentleman at these functions."

"Yes, mother."

He does not fall asleep in front of strangers again. Not even when it is very late and he is _very_ bored. Whenever he is tempted, he has only to glance over at his father; the man always seems to know when Rufus is getting close to nodding off, and Rufus can see the threat in his eyes. _Do it,_ the threat says, _and when we get home you're going to get it._

Rufus has to learn to dance, to smile when he doesn't mean it, to feign interest and to talk to people for long periods without actually saying anything. He is dressed in perfectly-tailored suits, sized for his small frame. Everyone comments on what a beautiful family they are, how happy they are and how much they love one another.

* * *

Over time, Rufus begins to recognize the appeal of mathematics. His new tutor loves the subject, and she teaches her love to Rufus. She adds philosophy lessons to the curriculum when Rufus is twelve, and Rufus comes to realize that there is fundamental truth in math that can be found nowhere else. There is beauty in numbers, and purity in mathematical functions. It enchants him to realize that even the most perfect circle drawn on a sheet of paper is a poor substitute for a true circle, an ideal circle, one that can exist only as an equation and never in crude matter. His tutor teaches him how to construct a mathematical proof, and he sometimes entertains himself by finding proofs for different principles.

Mathematics are well-ordered, rigorous, and predictable. When done correctly, an equation produces the same result every time. Mathematics never lie, and are never wrong. They are true at all times, in all places, for all people, and would be true even if there were no people. Mathematics and logic are inextricably intertwined, and together form the foundation of reality. Where Rufus had once found math unutterably boring, now he thinks it transcendent.

His father is far more pleased by Rufus's interest in numbers than he had been when Rufus was interested in science. The man does not appreciate the elegant perfection of equations, but he knows how to apply mathematics to the task of calculating profit maximization, and to finding the lowest point in an efficiency curve. His rages are far less frequent now, and life feels good to Rufus.

Reno arrives when Rufus is approaching thirteen, and Rude is hired five months later. Rufus takes an immediate liking to Reno, who is darkly cheerful and does not censor his language around the boss's son. There are things that Reno talks about - killings and espionage and such - that the other Turks are more careful to keep circumspect. Tseng tells Veld, and Veld tries to keep Reno and Rufus apart, but when Rufus requests Reno as his guard and companion there is nothing to be done.

Before long, Rufus finds himself wanting Reno's approval in the same way he wants Tseng's, or his father's, but Reno's approval is much easier to obtain. He is more casual than Tseng, in his language and his behavior, more open, effusive where Tseng is reserved. Rufus shows Reno his chocobo, and Reno freely admires both the bird and Rufus's riding skills; Rufus shows Reno a mathematical proof he has just devised, and Reno admits that the whole business looks like a form of magic to him and Rufus must be _some kind of fuckin' genius_ to understand it.

It's from Reno that Rufus gets his first taste of whiskey, and his first taste of cigarettes. He dislikes both immediately, but says otherwise so that the older and more-worldly Reno won't look down on him; Reno is not fooled, but is kind enough to pretend that he is.

It's from Reno that Rufus gets his first kiss. It happens almost accidentally. Rufus asks about the weapon that Reno carries along with his gun, and Reno shows him how it's used. The way Reno swings the mag-rod against an imaginary attacker is so _physical,_ so fast and fluid, and Rufus wants to try it. Reno gives him the rod, stands behind him and grips his wrists to push him into the correct stance, his body aligned behind Rufus in a way that is suddenly overwhelmingly intimate. Rufus becomes flustered, trips, and Reno has to catch him to keep him from falling on his face, and somehow they wind up facing one another with Reno holding Rufus upright.

There is a moment's pause, they stare at each other, with Rufus weirdly aware of Reno's body against his own and Reno's arms around him; he is uncomfortable, but somehow at the same time wants ... he has no idea what he wants. Reno hesitates, leans in a bit, and then there is soft warmth against Rufus's lips, and Reno's hand moves down his back.

Reno steps away a moment later, saying something inane about the weapon and how Rufus is obviously a natural with it, and Rufus complies with the unspoken request and pretends that did not just happen. The sensations imprint themselves on Rufus's body, however, and that night he has confused dreams that leave his bedclothes stained.

Rufus stops requesting Reno as his guard. Reno seems carefree about the change, and soon recruits Rude to be his partner in crime. They do not speak about the kiss, then or ever. Tseng resumes his previous position as Rufus's preferred guardian, and only surrenders this assignment when duty demands that he must absolutely be elsewhere.

For new Turks who arrive in the department after this, Guarding Rufus takes on the quality of a legendary assignment, one that is of momentous importance and immense prestige but which can almost never be obtained. It becomes almost a rite of passage, to be finally proven enough, trusted enough, to take Tseng's place when he has to step away from the President's son.

* * *

When Rufus is almost fourteen, the good life ends, seemingly overnight. The war is suddenly the topic of every conversation, and every conversation carries worried overtones. Rufus's father becomes more tense, more like he used to be before they moved into the Tower.

Rufus asks Tseng, one day after his riding lesson is finished and the Turk is prepping the helicopter to carry them back to Midgar. Tseng explains, in his calm and measured voice, that the war with Wutai has taken a bad turn. The Wutains have launched a major offensive, and they have obtained advanced weaponry from some unknown source; someone is selling them Shinra-made weapons. What had been a war practically won has become a war that might actually be lost.

At dinner that night, Rufus's father is stormy and barely civil; the tension frightens Rufus. He becomes clumsy, and accidentally drops a bite of sauced meat onto the tablecloth.

His father snaps. "What the fuck is the matter with you?" the man screams, and a moment later he has Rufus by the arm and is shaking him violently, the way he used to. "Huh? _What the fuck is wrong with you?_ Do you know how much this _costs?"_

Rufus's mother pleads with him, the way she used to, and Rufus's father strikes her away, exactly the way he used to. It's all so terrifyingly familiar that Rufus falls back into the same inarticulate stammered apologies, and it's like the intervening years of almost-peace never happened.

The next morning he has bruises across both his upper arms where his father grabbed him, and more over his ribs from being thrown against the table. He examines them dispassionately in the mirror, and chooses a long-sleeved shirt to wear, to hide them. He checks his wardrobe. Too many of his shirts have short sleeves.

That afternoon he asks his mother for money, to buy new clothes. She won't look at him at first, and then she pulls him to herself and begins to cry. "I'm sorry," she tells him, clutching his jacket. "He doesn't mean it, Rufus. He loves us, he's just under so much pressure right now. You don't know how hard he's been working."

"I know, mother," Rufus tells her. There is a great empty space inside him. "Don't cry. It will make him angry if he sees you crying."

Tseng escorts him to the tailor. Rufus tells the tailor that he's simply outgrowing everything, and he is measured for new clothes; the story is not questioned. He tries on a few off-the-rack jackets, just to get a feel for what kind of style he wants. The current fashion is for dark colors, black and charcoal and primary jewel tones. That has always looked good on him, brought out the ashy glint in his hair and the crystal blue of his eyes, but when he looks at himself in the mirror today all he can see are the bruises under the cloth.

"What if everything were white?" he asks the tailor.

The woman laughs in her motherly way, thinking he's kidding, but he assures her that he's serious so she gives it some serious thought. "If you were anyone else, I'd say it was a terrible idea," she says in the end. "Everyone would laugh. But you, Mr. Shinra?" She clucks. "I think you could get away with it. They'll say you're _trendsetting."_

He smiles, feeling nothing but that terrible emptiness. She is at least half-right ... no one who is anyone would be caught dead in white. Midgar is becoming more and more dingy by the day; white catches stains at worst, and captures the lurid green haloes in the sky at best. At this moment, Rufus doesn't care what anyone else might think. "I'd like that, then. Can I see some fabric?" She tries to make an appointment for him to come back for a fitting in three days, but he makes excuses and schedules it for two weeks. The bruises should be mostly gone by then.

Tseng does not volunteer an opinion, and Rufus does not ask for one.

His father is going to be furious - white is _very_ unfashionable right now, and probably will be for the indefinite future - and when Rufus gets home he considers calling the tailor to cancel the order and ask for the pieces in more-trendy black. Anxiety builds within him, but he never picks up the phone.

Two weeks later, when Rufus is finally dressed in the first few new pieces and looks at himself in the tailor's mirror, something calms inside him that he didn't even know had been restless. The white of his new jacket is pure in a way that a colored fabric could never be. There is an ethereal quality to it that brings to mind the unattainable perfection of a circle, and Rufus thinks that the white-clad person in the mirror is someone who could never bear the marks of violence on his body. He will never see bruises under these clothes, not because they are concealed, but because they will be wiped away, made as though they had never existed.

The tailor fusses, tugging at the fabric here and there and fastening it with pins. "Only you could pull this off," she tells him, and she swipes her hand through his hair. "Such a handsome young man. Your father must be so proud of you."

Tseng stands near the door to the tailor's shop, and Rufus's eyes flick to his image in the mirror. The Turk is impassive, no hint on his face to betray what he might be thinking.

The cut and color of the new clothes feel so perfect to Rufus, so proper and _right,_ but he knows how his father is going to react. He _knows_ his father is not going to take this well. So he prepares to defend his choice. It has been a while since he last tried to defend himself and was whipped until he bled, and the very idea of it leaves him in a cold, fearful sweat. While the tailor takes a few more days to work again on the first batch, Rufus practices what he will say, how he will phrase his defense so as to not sound like he is _talking back._ He must be respectful, keep his voice down, not contradict anything his father says, and above all he _must not cry._

He has another fitting, and then the day comes and his first few sets of new clothes are finished. They are delivered during the workday, while Rufus's father is not home, and Rufus takes them immediately to his bedroom and hangs them up in the wardrobe.

He tries on one of the suits, and of course it fits him perfectly. The cut of the jacket is very current and very stylish, and if it were black or gray it would be the absolute height of fashion.

His mother walks in while he is examining himself in the tri-fold mirror. "That's what you got?" she asks, and then she gives a nervous laugh.

Rufus feels very calm, very poised. Pure. Void. "Yes."

Her nervous laugh becomes a half-sob, and she presses her hands to her mouth. "He's going to be angry," she says. "Is that what you want? Are you _deliberately_ trying to make him angry?"

He realizes that she won't understand, and he can't explain it to her. "Whatever."

She grabs him by the arm and yanks him around to face her, and shakes him. "Why are you doing this?" she demands. "Why have you _done_ this?"

His mother is not as strong as his father, and Rufus is no longer five; her grip is bruising, but Rufus is able to pull away from her fairly easily. "It's _mine_ to do!" he says, and he's not sure what that means exactly, but he says it again. "This is _my_ thing to do! It has nothing to do with you!"

She slaps him, and he's so shocked by it that he's paralyzed. "Of course it has something to do with me!" she tells him, and then she turns and walks out of the room. He hears her give a frustrated scream in the hallway, and then sobbing across the suite. It is several minutes before he can move.

Rufus wears the new, white clothes to dinner. His father just stares when he walks into the dining room, stunned, and for an instant Rufus thinks he's going to get away with it. His father is going to laugh, let it go, think it's a funny joke, indulge him. "Do whatever you like, son," his father is going to say.

Then his father's expression twists, and the momentary fantasy of tolerance is blown aside by the explosion. His father grabs him by the lapels of the new jacket, tries to tear it off him, doesn't succeed but does manage to severely damage the fabric, and screams and screams about _how much this cost_ and _what people are going to say about us_ and _we'll be the laughingstocks of the entire city._ Rufus's prepared speeches fall out of his mind; he is reduced once more to gibbering terror. He is thrown so hard against a chair that the chair breaks; things go hazy after that, because his father slams his head down on the edge of the table, then hauls him up by the hair and does it again. Then again.

At some point Rufus winds up on his back on the floor, bewildered and bleeding, and his father is yelling hysterically, with a note in his voice that Rufus has never heard before and isn't sure he's hearing now. He's injured, he thinks dimly, and that's the most complex thought he can form. Eventually he becomes aware that more people are in the room, and he is being checked. They're talking but he can't understand what they're saying; he tries to tell them that he's hurt, but he can't seem to make the words come out correctly and keeps repeating it. Then he's lifted up onto an elevated surface and he realizes that it's a stretcher, and these are some of the company paramedics.

He's taken down to the infirmary and X-rayed, and the cuts on his head are stitched up. Tseng arrives shortly after Rufus and talks to the doctor. He's told that Rufus is concussed and should not be left alone, and he can't be given a potion until his confusion clears up a bit and he can be relied on to swallow it. Tseng sits next to the boy's bed and talks to him for a while. He does not convey the most important, most shattering bit of news, but instead discusses with him something relatively trivial: the progress of the war. Rufus remains confused and can't keep proper track of what Tseng is saying, and an hour later he becomes drowsy and badly nauseated.

Tseng calls the doctor back in, and another X-ray is taken and a cautious dose of curative magic is administered. This helps; the nausea goes away and Rufus is more awake. A few hours later he is coherent enough to take a potion.

The potion clears his head, mostly, and closes the wounds he sustained. A nurse carefully picks the stitches back out and tells Rufus and Tseng that there should be no visible scars. She is subdued, very quiet, but Rufus is still dazed enough to find nothing unusual in her behavior.

Mid-morning, Veld turns up in the infirmary. He takes Tseng aside, gives him the news that Tseng had been fearing all night.

"I have to tell him, don't I?" asks Tseng.

Veld rests a hand on his shoulder. "Yes." He does not have to explain why.

Once Veld is gone, Tseng returns to the room where Rufus is resting and sits down again next to the bed. "Sir," he says, and then in a moment of broken protocol, he says, "Rufus."

Rufus looks at him, and before Tseng even says anything at all, it strikes him. Somehow, he knows; that empty place inside him is no longer calm and still, no longer void, but full of a screaming agony. Still, he waits for the words, hoping against hope that they won't be what he knows they will be.

Tseng takes his hand. "Your mother ... passed away this morning."

There is a moment when the calm returns, and Rufus thinks, _of course, of course._ Then the moment passes, something within him breaks, and Tseng holds him and rubs his shoulder while he sobs into the Turk's chest.

It is the last time in his life that Rufus Shinra will cry.

* * *

When Rufus is well enough to return home, his father is out. The clothes that Rufus wore to that terrible dinner were utterly ruined, but he had more than the one set made. He initially fears that his father might have destroyed them, too, or thrown them out, but when he opens the wardrobe doors they're right there, hanging in neat rows. He takes out another white suit and puts it on. The fabric is heavy, expensive, and drapes in clean lines around him.

Rufus looks at himself in the mirror, and sees an untouched, untouchable creature. He nods. That's the person he wants to be.

When his father comes home, late that night, Rufus is sitting up waiting for him. The man's face twists when he sees what Rufus is wearing, and Rufus raises his chin, ready to be told that his mother's death is _his_ fault, that _he_ is the one who provoked that explosion. It won't matter. It's nothing he has not already said to himself.

The words don't come. His father says nothing. He turns aside, walks away, and does not confront his son.

* * *

All of Rufus's other clothes are discarded, and he fills his wardrobe with white. His riding clothes become white. His hat and gloves and all of his ties are white. His umbrella is white.

Tseng draws the line at white shoes. "You'll be having them polished four times a day," he tells Rufus, and Rufus has to concede that. This requires a slight compromise, because an ensemble of pure white with black _shoes_ looks ridiculous. Rufus has some black shirts made, and some black vests and a few black ties, and when he sees himself in the mirror it feels less like a compromise. The chiaroscuro lines make the white even more pure, more uncontaminated.

He still must attend functions with his father, and he is the only person wearing white at each one. If anyone laughs about Rufus's new look, however, they do it far away from him, so far away that he never hears even the slightest rumor that someone is saying an unkind thing. Occasionally someone remarks that he must be doing it in his mother's memory, rest her soul, the poor dear taken so young, such a tragic accident ...

His father's remorse (if that's what it is) fades after a while, and within three months the strain of the Wutai war begins to again express itself in shouted words and blue-black marks on Rufus's body. Each time it happens, he checks his clothes for damage, throws them away if any is found, and re-dresses himself in clean, pure, flawless white. The bruises are gone while he's dressed, not merely invisible but completely gone. Sometimes he stays up all night, working on mathematical proofs to occupy himself, so that he won't have to get undressed and sleep.


	2. Junon

When Rufus is sixteen the war seems to turn again, and his father's rages start to taper off. It is the stress, after all, that does it. _Pressure_ is the source of the violence, and when it goes away, so does the violence. That's what Rufus's mother always said, and Rufus believes it.

President Shinra, once a powerfully-built man, has gained a lot of weight in the two years since his wife's death, and Rufus is both taller and more athletic than he is. Rufus still rides twice a week, but his lessons are less about learning now and more about practicing lessons learned earlier. He and Sunny (or Seven Sails, as she is properly called) have already competed in two dressage shows. They did not place, but Rufus knows that they can. They just have to practice more. Sunny still greets him with excited warks when he walks to the paddock from the chopper, and her feathers are the softest thing Rufus has ever touched. He can mount without a block now, but she still towers over him when she raises her head.

He wears white when he rides, and the barn staff have to be meticulous with Sunny's grooming, so that his clothes are not sullied. Rufus becomes quite angry if his chocobo is not spotlessly clean.

One day his father announces, "I'm making you Vice President."

Rufus has no idea what to think about that. "Yes, father," he says.

"The employees need to get used to the idea of answering to you," his father continues. "I'm going to put you over just one department for now. I'm thinking about the Turks. How would you like that?"

Again, Rufus has no clue what to say; his father has never consulted him before on what he would like to do with himself. "Yes, father," he says. "That would be fine."

The company org chart is updated that same morning, and Veld finds out about it just before lunch. He is pleased; he's been angling and pulling strings for this for a couple of years now.

The following day, Rufus goes to visit "his" department, interested in learning everything about their operation since he is now technically responsible for it. Veld has rearranged the offices, so that Rufus has the one he occupied himself until yesterday; when Rufus sits down at his new desk, he is overcome with a feeling he's never experienced before, and for which he has no name.

Veld provides him with a quick sketch of the department's operations, along with several much more detailed files for Rufus to review at his leisure. Then he brings in all the Turks who are in the office that day to greet their new VP and pay their respects. Everyone in the department is excited about this development; the Turks have been guarding Rufus, watching him, accompanying him everywhere since he was born. They think of him as their own special responsibility, not to be shared with any other organization in the company. Of _course_ they must be assigned to him. It could not happen any other way.

They are respectful. They call him _sir._ But they smile, and laugh, and are pleased to have him present. Reno cracks a crude joke and is reprimanded by Tseng. Rufus does not laugh, nor smile, but his dour and serious expression softens a bit, and Tseng's heart leaps to think that the boy might actually be happy.

* * *

Now that Rufus is a Turk, in a backhanded kind of way, Tseng decides that his desultory weapons training need to be stepped up. Rufus has never be very interested, preferring to spend his free time riding Sunny instead of learning to shoot, but Tseng thinks it has become vital and Veld agrees. Rufus is still young and impressionable; although these are his employees, who report to him, they are adults and he is a teenager. He gives in when Veld delicately pressures him to agree.

Rufus is all right with a rifle, but a rifle is hardly an appropriate weapon to carry around under one's coat. Tseng gets him comfortable with a handgun, now that Rufus is strong enough to control one, and also lets him try out knives, swords, and even Reno's mag-rod. Remembering what happened the first and last time he touched Reno's mag-rod, Rufus refuses to do more than swing it once.

He likes the look of the knives, though, and the feel of them in his hands; knife-fighting turns out to be a little bit like dancing, and there is enough enjoyment in learning the skill to stick with it. He wears a knife in each boot, and one up his left sleeve. Tseng also pushes for him to choose a firearm, but Rufus has already learned to shoot a rifle and thinks that is adequate. After a consultation with Veld, Tseng introduces Rufus to a sawed-off shotgun with a reduced stock. It's easy to use and powerful at short range, and will compensate for most defects in Rufus's aim.

After a little more pressure from Veld, Rufus accepts the shotgun and has his clothes redesigned around it. He begins to wear long under-coats with the shotgun hanging in an open holster, and his tailor cuts the fabric to conceal the presence and swing of the weapon so that no one looking at him can tell he is armed. After a time Rufus comes to like having the shotgun with him. It makes him feel like an adult, someone to be reckoned with. He practices with it, and becomes stronger and better able to handle it.

He wears it when riding, and it makes him feel like some kind of heroic cavalry rider.

He does not wear it at home, because he's afraid of what he might do with it there.

* * *

Rufus runs into Reno quite frequently now, as they are both in and out of the office at much the same times. This is uncomfortable for Rufus at first, but Reno behaves as though nothing whatsoever is wrong, and his absolutely normal demeanor soon eases Rufus's discomfort. When Reno is not out on assignment he tends to drop by Rufus's office, just to check if he needs anything or wants to chat. Reno is no longer a rookie; he knows everyone, and everyone talks to him, so he is always on top of the office gossip and he's always willing to share it with Rufus. This seems beneath Rufus's dignity at first, but Reno is irrepressible and within a few weeks Rufus starts to look forward to Reno's gossipy visits.

It's also Reno who is the most up-front with Rufus about the day-to-day operations of the department. Veld and Tseng are diplomatic with what they know to be a callow teenager; they use diplomatic, passive-voiced phrases like _the obstruction was removed_ and _no further resistance presented itself_ and _information was obtained._ Reno speaks in a different manner. He uses phrases like _cut the woman's throat_ and _broke his kid's fingers until he talked, yeah?_ and _pushed 'em face-first int'the Mako one at a time, real slow, an' man I think my ears're still ringin'._

A few months later, once Rufus has settled into his new position, his father starts to summon him to executive meetings. The same department heads who sneered at him when he toured their divisions at ten years old now nod to him respectfully when he takes his place at the table. Rufus is silent and attentive; he acquires a leather-bound folder in which to take notes, and does so. He sits at his father's right hand, asking no questions and only taking notes. He is as interested in the interpersonal workings of the company as he is in the projects whose progress is being reported. Through the course of many meetings he develops a sort of relationship shorthand, and his notes are full of cryptic symbols and lines, like a distorted flow chart, showing the way power moves and settles between individuals and between blocks of the company.

The Shinra Corporation upper management, he realizes, runs on the same type of fuel that populates Reno's incessant gossip. The stakes are different - higher - when it's Heidegger calling in a favor from Scarlet in order to undercut Palmer, than when it's one of the secretaries calling in a favor from a friendly Turk in order to undercut a rival who wants the same promotion. But Rufus recognizes the same dynamics in operation, and the next time Reno drops by the office to chat, Rufus has a proposal for him.

"You're serious," says Reno. "You want me t'socialize _more."_

"Yes," says Rufus. "I want to know everything that people are talking about and doing, especially to one other. Executives and department directors take priority, but I really want to know everything, even the smallest things."

Reno laughs, and it's one of those open cackling laughs that make him such an interesting person. "I dunno if you really wanna know what Scarlet is doin' with Lazard, Boss."

"Of course I do," says Rufus, innocent. "Are they plotting something?"

"Oh, they're plottin' _somethin',"_ says Reno with a wicked grin. He perches on the corner of Rufus's desk and leans closer. "Like how best t'hide their little _liaisons_ from Heidegger an' your dad."

Rufus does not know what that means and asks for clarification, and Reno gives it in excruciating detail; the more embarrassed Rufus becomes, the more delight Reno takes in the telling. By the time Reno leaves, Rufus is utterly unable to concentrate. No matter what he looks at or tries to think about, his mind snaps back to Reno's description of Scarlet crouching under Lazard's desk, using her mouth on him while he tries to keep a straight face to an unexpected visitor.

At the next meeting, Rufus takes note of the way Scarlet and Lazard speak to, and around, one another, and devises a new symbol for his relationship flow-chart shorthand. Once he has it, he starts looking for sexual relationships everywhere. Sometimes he is sure he's found one, and sometimes he is not so sure, and sometimes Reno's gossip reveals one to him that he had not suspected at all by looking at the participants.

The dreams come back, ones that Rufus never quite remembers but which leave him messy in the mornings. He knows that they relate to Reno, and to Reno's gleeful, explicit gossip, and how pleasurably tense Reno sometimes leaves him.

"What about you?" Rufus asks, shortly before his seventeenth birthday. "Who are you _doing,_ as you say?"

He's not sure why he asks - maybe he just wants more fuel for his dreams - and if Reno finds the question surprising or too personal, he gives no indication. "Me? Coupla people. Renalda down in IT. The Davis twins in Accountin'. I sometimes pick up some tail in the bar if I'm bored an' drunk enough." He winks. "Occasionally Scarlet. Why? You wanna join the club, Boss?"

His grin is mischievous, and Rufus almost retorts that of course he doesn't, that's a ridiculous suggestion, get out of my office, and if Reno were anyone else he would have said exactly that. But if Reno were anyone else, this conversation wouldn't be happening in the first place.

"What if I do?" Rufus asks, and his face feels hot as he says it.

"I'd say I prob'ly oughta close the door, yo."

Rufus swallows; his mouth is suddenly dry. "Does it lock?"

It does. Reno is straightforward and unashamed. He first straddles Rufus's lap, opens the white coat and black shirt, and presses his mouth to Rufus's while sliding his hands over the young VP's chest. Rufus feels the man's tongue on his lips, and opens his mouth slightly at the prompt; an instant later he is moaning into the Turk's mouth, drowning in the liquid, wet _intimacy_ of the kiss. His body goes taut, straining against Reno's hands against his skin, fingertips against his nipples, and his groin aches as Reno shifts on his lap and rubs against it.

"Damn," Reno whispers. Rufus's hands are clenched on the chair's arms; Reno picks them up and guides Rufus to touch him in return, to unbutton his own disheveled shirt and run across the skin beneath it. Rufus feels lightheaded, like he can't get any air.

Once Rufus is wound up and shaking, Reno pulls away and gets off his lap, kneels on the floor between his legs, and unfastens his pants and moves his boxers to free his erection. Reno has barely taken it into his mouth before Rufus comes, biting his lip and spluttering to keep from crying aloud; then he watches with dazed amazement as Reno licks him clean. It seems gross, but Reno obviously doesn't mind.

The experience leaves Rufus wrung out, muscles quaking and weak as though he has done hard exercise; he raises a hand to Reno's face and it trembles. From his seat on the floor Reno gives him a cheerful grin. "Don't suppose you'd mind givin' me a hand, too?" he asks.

"Sure," says Rufus, without thinking, and then he has to amend, "You don't expect me to ..."

"Nah," says Reno, pulling himself back up into Rufus's lap. "That'd be weird anyway. Just kiss me, yeah?"

Rufus nods, and before he has a chance to consider where Reno's mouth has just been the man is kissing him again; it definitely tastes different this time, but not bad, and certainly not as gross as Rufus might have expected. Reno undoes his own pants and guides one of Rufus's hands to his hard erection, helps Rufus to stroke him, and eventually pulls his mouth away to pant and groan against Rufus's shoulder. Rufus can't believe he's doing this, he _can't believe_ he has another man thrusting into his hand, or that Reno just _did that_ to him, and the _sounds_ Reno is making are giving him that strange and quivery feeling again even though his cock does not respond.

Reno starts to whisper to him, _harder, hold tighter, oh fuck you're so hot_ and then bites the VP's shoulder as he comes, warm and sticky, into Rufus's hand. He has the presence of mind, even at that moment, to move his own hand to catch the ejaculate and keep it from soiling Rufus's clothes.

Then he does an impossibly disgusting thing and licks his hand and Rufus's hand clean.

"Um," says Rufus, his vocabulary blown out of his mind by what has just transpired. "There are ... um ... I have a handkerchief ..."

Giving him that cocky grin once more, Reno says, "First rule of office sex is, leave no evidence. Especially when you're doin' it where Turks might find it." He wipes his hands dry on his shirt, along his sides where his jacket will conceal any marks.

Then he moves to button up Rufus's shirt, and pauses. "What happened here, yo?" he asks, having found a half-healed bruise along Rufus's ribs. It's in that gruesome stage, the edges turning green, the center still mottled purple and black.

Rufus reacts instantly, yanking his shirt out of Reno's grasp and pulling it closed. "I had an accident," he says coldly.

"Yeah?"

"Yes. It's nothing, I'm just, I'm just clumsy sometimes."

"Oh?"

Reno's tone is casual, but he's sharp and he's a Turk; when Rufus looks up he knows his overreaction has given him away. "It's none of your business!" Rufus tells him, and he tries to make his tone firm. It comes across as desperate instead.

There's a moment when Rufus can _see_ the gears turning in Reno's head, the hardness in the Turk's blue-green eyes. In the end, however, Reno just smiles again and says with a carefree air, "Yes, sir." He finishes buttoning up Rufus's shirt, closes his pants, straightens out his coat and fastens the straps, and then stands up to do the same for himself.

"It was just an accident," says Rufus again, wanting Reno to believe him. "I ... I fell while riding, and landed against the arena railing. That's all."

"I didn't ask," says Reno. "It's none of my business, yo."

"Right. That's right." It's none of his business.

"So, hey." Reno grins again, and there's no sign now of the suspicion that Rufus knows the man has. "You ever wanna do this again, you lemme know. I'd have t'say, I wouldn't mind."

"I ..." The offer leaves Rufus a little unsettled. "Don't tell anyone about this! No one, you hear me?"

"Reno of the Turks does not kiss and tell." He does, however, take a dramatic bow. "Except t'you, 'cause you're the Veep, but you gotta know I don't tell this stuff t'anyone else."

"Good." Rufus hopes he can trust that, and fears what will certainly happen if his father were to ever find out about this. He taps his fingers on his desk, nervous.

Reno's expression goes serious for a moment. "You're one of ours, now, sir," he says. "We take care of our own. You remember that, yeah?"

Things are uncomfortable again for Rufus, for a while, as he becomes paranoid about the rest of the department finding out what he did with Reno. Reno, on the other hand, is completely unchanged, his conduct toward Rufus and everyone else exactly the same as it was before. No one else gives even a hint that they have a clue; there are no knowing looks, no suggestive teasing or double entendres.

Over the passage of a couple of weeks, Rufus begins to believe that Reno really hasn't told anyone, and that nobody noticed the locked door and wondered what was happening behind it. His paranoia relaxes. The dreams come back. He starts to touch himself in the shower, thinking about Reno at first, and then, shamefully, about Tseng.

His father becomes _stressed_ on Rufus a couple of times, but there is no mention of Reno. Eventually Rufus loses his terror that his father will find out and beat him literally to death.

* * *

Rufus is halfway to his eighteenth birthday when the chocobo stable hires a new barn hand, a teenaged boy a year older than Rufus himself. He is inexperienced, and doesn't know how serious the barn manager is when he is instructed to ensure that every speck of dirt is gone from Sunny and Sunny's tack by the time Rufus is scheduled to arrive. Sunny is groomed, but not as thoroughly as she needs to be, and some of the sandy dirt from her morning dust bath is still on her when Rufus mounts.

The grime is starkly visible against his white riding coat and pants, and before Rufus even knows what he's doing he's stalked halfway across the grounds, demanding at the top of his lungs to know _who is responsible for this._ The barn manager and all of the staff come running, out of the stable, out of the office, from the nearby seed barn, and Rufus quickly singles out the new hand; he doesn't know this boy, and therefore he must be new, and therefore he must be the one who fucked up. Twenty seconds later Tseng pulls Rufus off him, and the boy is running for his life with six slashes from Rufus's riding crop across his face and neck. Had Rufus gone for his knife instead of his riding crop, the boy would be mutilated, possibly dead.

Rufus has never before lost his temper so completely, and when he comes to his senses he knows he should apologize, but the barn manager is faster and practically grovels in the dirt, begging for Rufus to forgive them. _This is wrong,_ Rufus thinks, _this is backwards,_ but the thought remains just a thought; when he does not turn his fury on the barn manager, the man orders Sunny to be taken back in and properly groomed, and then he invites Rufus into the office. There he gives Rufus a drink and more apologies, and a promise to both fire the new kid and to ensure that he never works in this industry again.

_They're afraid of me,_ Rufus realizes. Tseng, standing near the door, watches the understanding slowly dawn across the Shinra heir's face, and he wonders what he could have done differently, to head this off.

Two days later Reno is in Rufus's office, passing along gossip as usual, and Rufus decides to ask, "If I asked you to kill someone for me, would you?"

Nothing takes Reno aback or leaves him at a loss for words; his answer is immediate. "Name 'em."

"What if I wanted you to terrorize someone first, and make sure this person suffered?"

Reno has a thousand ways to make someone suffer, and offers them all up in a heartbeat. "You just tell me how much you hate 'em, an' I'll make sure the message goes through." Then he cocks his head to the side, and asks, "This a serious question, yo, or you just teasin' me, hypothetical-like?"

Rufus considers sending Reno after that kid who dirtied up his coat, but ultimately decides it would be a poor use of Reno's valuable time; Reno is a professional, after all, and not to be wasted on trivial grievances. He has admit that it's just hypothetical at this point, and after a visibly disappointed Reno leaves his office Rufus contemplates for the first time what it actually _means_ to be in command of the Turks.

He has a political function to attend that evening, alongside his father. During cocktails before dinner, President Shinra chats up a group of pretty young ladies half his age, while Rufus sips from a glass of champagne and nods at all the right moments as the Mayor of Midgar outlines his plan to revitalize the slums to himself and four other dignitaries. Rufus is not really listening; he is instead surveying the faces of the other people in this little conversation group. They keep giving him sidelong glances, and give the same kind of glances to the four Turks stationed around the perimeter of the room.

The Turks make them nervous, Rufus realizes. _And so do I._

"That's very interesting," he says finally, and is engaged by how everyone immediately stops talking, mid-sentence, to listen to him. "But maybe you should first explain why the people in the slums are worth that kind of outlay. Why shouldn't we just send SOLDIERs down there to wipe them out?"

The Mayor did not expect _that_ kind of challenge, and he flusters for a few moments trying to construct an argument for why the people under the plate are actually human beings with inherent worth. Rufus doesn't listen to it; the comment was only intended to provoke him and Rufus does not care about the response. The only thing he cares about is the way all the people around him - wealthy people, philanthropists mostly, mature adults - take his calculatedly cruel and callous position as a serious one that needs to be seriously addressed.

_They're all afraid of me,_ he thinks. They're all anxious to convince him that slum dwellers should not be exterminated outright, as though he were both actually considering that and capable of having it carried out. Not one of them is willing to express outrage, or tell him that he is deranged for even considering that the people of the slums might be so beyond worthless that they should be massacred.

There's one person who is not afraid of Rufus, however, and one person that his Turks _(his_ Turks) will not attempt to touch. Rufus's gaze finds the figure of his father, laughing at something one of the ladies has said, resting his hand on one woman's backside.

Rufus finishes off his champagne.

Something will have to be done about the old man.

* * *

Rufus's masturbatory fantasies take a couple of strange turns. First he pictures the boy from the chocobo stable strung up in a windowless room in the depths of the Tower, naked and spread-eagled between ceiling and floor, and Rufus _punishes_ him properly for his error with Sunny's grooming. He can't really remember what the young man looks like, but it doesn't matter. Rufus whips the boy raw, the image all rage and vented fury, but later the punishment he imagines administering becomes increasingly sexualized. On this mental diet he brings himself to orgasm almost daily during his morning shower, and he ceases to ejaculate involuntarily in the night.

Over time, however, he discovers that the same fantasy can't get him off again and again indefinitely, and his mind drifts to other things. There comes a morning when nothing will send a thrill down his cock until he pictures Reno, but he shies away instantly from thinking about Reno under his whip. Instead it's Reno with the weapon, and _Rufus_ tied up for sexual punishment, and he presses his forehead against the wall of the shower as he comes hard into his hand.

The day after he turns eighteen, Rufus's tutor is dismissed; he has learned everything that he is going to from formal education. Were he someone else he might go on to a university, get an advanced degree, but Rufus has other responsibilities.

Now that he can legally sign contracts, he becomes a company representative. He is sent hither and yon, across the continent and the world, to meet with representatives from other firms and do the company's business. Mainly he is concerned with acquisitions, and he quickly learns that threats typically get him farther than fair offers. At least two Turks accompany him on all trips, and sometimes he will bring a third. Once Tseng notices the way Rufus's mind is working he gives Rufus a few words of advice here and there, teaching him that _unspoken_ threats are better than _spoken_ ones, that people respond better to the unknown creeping fears created by their own minds than to concrete, real ones.

His work is crude at first, and his father is furious with him over a few of the early deals he signs, and a few that he doesn't sign because he was too clumsy and the other party ran. That changes. Rufus becomes more knowledgeable about what constitutes a good deal, and better at reading people and understanding how far he can push them. He makes a few examples of folks who refused to deal with Shinra on Rufus's terms; on Tseng's advice, he has Reno and Rude make them look like gruesome, horrifying accidents instead of assassinations.

The Shinra Corporation thereby retains its good reputation, but Rufus can drop hints to the contrary when necessary. He often does it over dinner with the other representative, by calling over Reno to the table and asking the Turk's opinion on just how agonizing that "accident" must have been, just how traumatized was the victim's family. Reno is a gleeful sadist, and never fails to rise to the occasion.

His father's irritation with him eases, and someone figures out who was feeding weapons to Wutai and closes the plug; that source of _pressure_ on his father eases as well. A couple of SOLDIERs have risen up in the ranks and are conducting the Wutai War quite well these days. A win for Shinra looks inevitable.

Life becomes good for Rufus again. The last of his bruises heal. His father laughs again, and talks freely with Rufus at dinner, about company business and about nothing at all. He suggests that Rufus start dating, but doesn't pressure. They vacation together in Costa del Sol. Rufus enjoys it. His father hugs him and tells him he loves him, and Rufus says, "I love you, too, Dad." He means it.

* * *

The war comes to an end, and most of the SOLDIERs come home to Midgar to fanfare and accolades. President Shinra can't be bothered to deal with giving the SOLDIERs the honor they deserve, so it falls to Rufus. He makes many public appearances, standing beside Sephiroth, who is the face of SOLDIER to the people, with Lazard as the VP over SOLDIER.

Rufus expects Sephiroth to be cocky and confrontational, and is surprised when Sephiroth is quiet and reserved instead; he reminds Rufus of Tseng, although they look nothing alike. Sephiroth always seems to see and know much more than he says aloud, and Rufus catches himself standing up straighter when he's next to the tall SOLDIER.

The newspapers run many stories, and Rufus is in many of the photos; it is the first exposure that most people have to him, outside the rarified circles of the über-wealthy. White becomes a sudden fashion craze amongst the middle class of Midgar, and Rufus starts to receive fan mail and the occasional deranged screed. The Turks step up security.

Rufus and Sunny finally win their first ribbon in a dressage show. The ribbon is not blue, but Rufus is confident that it's only a matter of time.

Then Rufus is interrupted during a meeting in Junon; Reno just walks straight into the room in the middle of negotiations, grabs him by the arm, and hauls him out. Rufus is incensed, but Reno tersely shuts him up and tells him, "There's been an attack. You gotta leave here, now."

He's hustled into the car and Reno accompanies him to the airstrip; the Turk is on his PHS almost the entire time, getting updates on the situation, and keeps checking the windows. There is pandemonium outside the limo, and when the car turns Rufus can see smoke rising into the sky.

At the airstrip, Reno pulls Rufus aside at the last second and sends the helicopter on its way, empty. "I think we're bein' tailed," he says when Rufus asks what's happening. "Wouldn't be surprised if the chopper gets shot down, yo."

Rufus has never seen Reno like this before, and is intimidated into total compliance. This makes Reno's job much easier, and he's able to stash Rufus in the SOLDIER barracks next to the airstrip.

"Stay here, sir," Reno tells him. "I gotta check the perimeter." He leaves Rufus alone for five minutes, and returns with a report that everything is as secure as it can be. Then he fills in Rufus: a couple of bombs went off near the Mako Cannon, and sabotage was discovered in the underwater Mako reactor. He doesn't think Rufus is being targeted directly, but whoever is responsible for the attack will definitely view Rufus as a target of opportunity if he makes himself vulnerable.

"What do we do?" asks Rufus, but Reno is interrupted by the ringing of his PHS before he can answer. It's Veld.

Reno receives his instructions, and says, "Yes, sir," before he hangs up. Then he gestures for Rufus to stand. "Time t'get you outta here, sir."

Rufus is smuggled out of the city in an armored personnel carrier, and then transferred to another helicopter in the foothills of the mountains for the trip back to Midgar. The helicopter lands on the roof of the Shinra Tower, and Rufus and Reno are instantly called into the President's office to be debriefed.

Rufus has little of substance to say, but Reno knows everything the Turks know up to this point and he issues a concise, comprehensive, and very straight report to the President. The news is bad ... Junon is a hardened installation, and the bombs were very precisely placed. Odds are high that it was an inside job. Reno sugar-coats nothing. Rufus sees the fury darkening his father's face, and shrinks inside.

It's less than three days later when Rufus's father learns that Rufus did not close that deal in Junon. The extenuating circumstances don't matter; all that's important is that Shinra has no contract with that engine manufacturer. Rufus winds up with a hairline fracture to his wrist, which is quietly healed with materia. He has to wear a wrap around his wrist for a few days after that, and explains to the curious Turks that he must have sprained it in the course of his evacuation from Junon.

He catches Reno, who was with him virtually the entire time during the escape from Junon, giving his wrapped wrist a narrow look and then glancing up to his face. Rufus won't meet his eyes.

* * *

The Junon attack is only the beginning. An outfit calling itself AVALANCHE eventually takes responsibility, for that and for other incidents around Midgar and elsewhere. They are some kind of ecology group, spreading propaganda that Shinra is destroying the planet. The Turks bring on more personnel. SOLDIER gets involved.

Rufus's father is worse than he's ever been before, and Rufus becomes very familiar with the sickening sensation of broken bones being forcibly healed.

His father _is_ going to kill him, he realizes, if nothing changes. If the situation could be improved, things could go back the way they'd been, and Rufus desperately wants that; he remembers that vacation in Costa del Sol, and how happy he'd been during it. But can Rufus do anything to accomplish that? He's no SOLIDER. He's not even a Turk.

That's not for lack of the Turks trying, exactly. Tseng and Veld ensure that Rufus gets a full course of personal defense training, and the Turks certainly treat him as one of their own. Occasionally Rufus toys with the idea of _telling_ someone, telling Tseng, or Reno, or _someone_ about the things that are happening to him behind closed doors; maybe his Turks will _protect_ him.

Then he remembers - they don't really work for him. They work for his father. Their loyalty is ultimately to his father.

Some of them suspect something. Reno might actually know what's going on. Rufus remembers telling Tseng about it once, long ago; Tseng is intelligent and is capable of figuring out that it's happening again. Cissnei starts to say things on occasion, letting Rufus know that he can talk to her about anything. He assures her blandly that if anything comes up, he'll definitely come to her.

None of them _do_ anything.

There's nothing they _can_ do for him.

He stops talking with the Turks except as relates to business. When Reno saunters into his office with gossip to share, Rufus tells him that he has a lot of work to do and doesn't have time right now. Tseng still accompanies him on outings, but they don't speak.

One evening when his father's temper has been particularly bad, Rufus is in his bedroom trying to assess if his arm has been broken again and he should go get it fixed, and a different sort of thought crosses his mind.

It's one he's had before, but he discarded it for a while. When life was good, and his father was gentle, it left Rufus's mind. Now it comes back.

Maybe _he_ can ... do something. About his father. Himself. Permanently.

* * *

Making contact with AVALANCHE proves to be laughably easy, but getting the trust of the people in the organization is much more difficult. They want to meet with him, talk to him face-to-face. Rufus is not that stupid. Besides which, it would be almost impossible to get away from his protective, ever-vigilant Turks. He talks to his contacts over the phone, calling from his office but routing the call through the front desk to conceal its true origin. When he needs to send them data, he mails a flash drive, wiped clean of prints.

He claims to be a disgruntled Shinra upper-middle manager, and feeds them intel. He gives them the floor plans to one of the reactors, and provides them with the schedule for SOLDIER movements between Shinra outposts. They complain about funding; he mails them a package full of cash.

The increased terrorist activity almost sends his father off the deep end, and one particularly cruel week after a reactor bombing, Rufus reconsiders his plan; he's actually putting his own life in more danger. He can always stop. AVALANCHE does not know who he is, or how to contact him. He can always break it off with them and stop.

But no. Rufus has done nothing about his father's temper his entire life, and _doing nothing_ no longer seems like a viable option. Keeping his voice low, not _talking back,_ trying to avoid triggering an explosion ... it's not working anymore. Rufus is nineteen, and not sure he's going to survive to his next birthday, whether he aids AVALANCHE or not. So ... why not?

Perversely, the Turks are the biggest danger to him. They already figure that the Junon job must have been handled with aid from inside Shinra, and the strikes AVALANCHE carries out with Rufus's information clinch it for them. Rufus must stop calling AVALANCHE from his office, and he corrupts the phone records to cover his tracks. The destruction of the records zeros the Turks' attention straight onto the Shinra Tower, but Rufus is very cautious after that. _First rule of office sex: leave no evidence._ That's the first rule of industrial espionage, too.

Rufus starts to suffer sleepless nights. He withdraws further from the Turks. He knows he's going to have to do something about them, and he tries to convince himself that he doesn't care.

Finally, he feeds AVALANCHE some information about Turk missions. The Turks he endangers are the new hires - ones he doesn't know well - and the disruption to their operations sends the department into days of chaos as Veld tries desperately to uncover the leak. They are reduced to interrogating the cleaning staff.

"How is it," Rufus asks his father one evening, when the man is relatively calm, angry but not explosively so, "that this terrorist group seemed to know exactly where the Turks were going to be yesterday?"

His father stabs at his meat with a fork, and Rufus reminds himself to be cautious and keep his voice submissive; it would take very little to set the man off right now. "What are you talking about, boy?"

"It was just a thought," says Rufus. "It's probably nothing. It just occurred to me, though, that of all the organizations in Shinra, you'd think that the _Turks_ at least would be fully secure."

There is a bad moment when his father gives him a hard stare, and Rufus can't keep himself from cringing a little. The explosion does not come, though. His father says only, "You've always been an idiot," and that's the end of it.

The hint has the desired effect, however. A week later Veld has been ousted. Tseng is in command, and can no longer be Rufus's shadow. The department is moved on the org chart and placed under Heidegger. Nobody is happy, except perhaps Heidegger.

Rufus approaches his father, saying that it would probably be best if he left the department for a while, so that there are no conflicts in the chain of command. His father, irritation mostly directed at Veld at the moment, agrees, but is at a loss for where to put Rufus instead. Rufus suggests the satellite office in Junon. He requests that Reno accompany him.

* * *

It is a thousand times easier to contact AVALANCHE from Junon than it had been in Midgar. Rufus still gets up-to-date information on all Shinra operations, and for a while he continues to implicate the Department of Administrative Research as the source of the leak in order to keep the department off-balance, and, just for shits and giggles, the Science Department as well. Reno grumbles sometimes, since it is very difficult to ensure that Rufus is secure when it's just him with no assistance. Rufus blows it off. "Nobody cares about me right now," he says. Reno is overworked, and can't cover everything, and that is to Rufus's advantage.

He has another set of second thoughts, now that there is a mountain range between him and his father and he is no longer living in terror. Over the course of his first few weeks in Junon, it feels as though a great weight lifts off Rufus. The world seems brighter. The arrival of dinnertime no longer fills him with shaking dread. He has a penthouse condo in Junon that is quiet, filled with peace, a place where he feels _safe._

Is he doing the right thing? He can still back out. How would he feel if Tseng were killed because of intel he fed to AVALANCHE? Or Reno, or Kat, or Rude, or any of the other Turks he has grown up knowing, and who care about him?

The weather in Junon is tempestuous, and Rufus's left wrist - broken multiple times in the last six months - aches almost constantly. Whenever he has these kinds of thoughts, he has only to remember why he must live with this pain, and his troubled conscience eases.

Veld is reinstated after a couple of weeks, the org chart fixed and Heidegger sent packing. Rufus fears he will be recalled to Midgar, but he seems to have slipped his father's mind and it doesn't happen. He doesn't want to leave Junon. Despite the weather, he is happy here.

Reno sleeps in Rufus's condo, on the living room couch. He takes it upon himself to ensure that Rufus eats properly, and that the place is picked up. He won't permit Rufus to hire a maid or a cook, seeing that as an unacceptable security risk, and Rufus no longer lives within the Shinra Tower, where food can be provided at any hour by the kitchen and housekeeping is done by security-cleared staff. So it's up to Reno to fill that role.

"I don't know how I'd live without you," comments Rufus one morning, watching Reno fry some bacon in the kitchen. He's thinking that he would probably eat out for breakfast a lot.

"Yeah, well, sir, you prob'ly wouldn't," says Reno. "You'd go get the mail an' there'd be a bomb, an' you'd just open it all innocent-like, 'cause you don't think that way, an' that'd be the end of you."

"Hmmm." Indeed, that kind of consequence really hadn't crossed Rufus's mind. He watches Reno cook for a while. The man is already in his uniform, as much as he is ever in his uniform; his mag-rod is clipped to his hip, and when his arm moves Rufus can see the gun in its holster under his jacket. He looks good. He always looks good. Rufus wonders how he would feel if he got Reno killed. The very idea makes him uneasy.

"Do you ever think about what we did that one day in my office?" he asks.

Reno half-turns, gives Rufus a sidelong look. "Of course," he says, then he switches off the stove and turns around completely. His grin is crooked. "Figured you didn't like it, s'why you never came back for more."

The way Reno is gazing at him makes Rufus feel hot. He puts his hands into his lap, because he doesn't know what else to do with them. His father is half a continent away, and there is nobody watching him except ... Reno. "I liked it," says Rufus, quietly.

"Happy t'hear that," says Reno, and he comes over to the couch, sits down in Rufus's lap, puts his arms around Rufus's shoulders. "That mean you want more?"

Nervous, but heated and already hard from the other man's proximity, Rufus reaches up to touch the buttons of Reno's shirt. "Yes," he says. "I ... I think so." He starts to undo the buttons.

Reno leans down, presses his lips to the side of Rufus's neck. "Lemme take care of you, sir," he whispers. "Just let me."

"But ..."

"I won't do anythin' you don't like. Say the word, an' I'll stop."

Rufus hesitates, and then gives a jerky little nod.

Reno strips him naked this time, slowly peeling off the layers of clothing in which Rufus hides himself. He lays wet, licking kisses across Rufus's skin as it is exposed - down his chest, across his abdomen, nipping down the inner surface of his thigh. When he comes back up for Rufus's mouth, Rufus pushes Reno's jacket off him; he's shaking with nerves, and a little humiliated at being completely nude, and he wants Reno in the same state. Reno understands the unspoken request, and complies.

There's nothing soft about Reno. He's lean, with bony angles everywhere, and his muscles are like hard cords wrapped around his frame. Rufus is strong, and in good shape from riding and from learning to fight, but it's nothing like Reno; it's marvelous to touch him. Even his hair is wiry. The Turk's erection is like the rest of him: long, slender, unyielding.

"Go ahead," says Reno, when he notices where Rufus is looking, not-surreptitiously-enough. He takes one of Rufus's hands and guides it down. "Do whatever you want, yeah? If it hurts, I'll yelp."

Rufus takes the man's cock into his hand and inexpertly strokes it, and Reno gives a gravelly groan and does something indescribable to the side of Rufus's neck with his teeth. "You're so damned hot," Reno tells him, the words slick with saliva. "Gaia, I wanna mess you up _so bad."_

"Okay," says Rufus. He has no idea what that means, but the lust in Reno's voice excites him.

Reno goes down on him, and Rufus quickly comes into the man's mouth, but Reno isn't finished. He is gentle with Rufus for a few minutes, and then begins to touch and lick him again. Rufus, already damp with sweat, gets that liquid feeling in his lower abdomen as his body responds, and about ten minutes later Reno has him hard and moaning again.

With the hair-trigger taken off, Reno can play with Rufus, and does. He takes Rufus by the wrists and holds him down, kisses him while grinding their erections together, then works Rufus's neck and shoulder deeply with his tongue. Rufus can barely think; he's overheated, sweating again, so turned on it feels like he's going to come again any second but somehow it just doesn't happen. He pulls against the hold on his wrists, and Reno immediately releases him.

"No," says Rufus, too in-the-moment to think about what he's saying. "Hold me down."

There's an instant of hesitation, then Reno obeys and pins Rufus's wrists over his head, against the arm of the couch. Rufus pulls, and this time Reno's grip tightens; the Turk's arms are like iron, and Rufus can struggle all he likes and not move him. It's a perversely freeing sensation, and Rufus twists his body, shameless now and heedless.

After a while, Reno forces Rufus's arms behind his back instead, so that the young man is wrapped in a hard embrace, because this lets Reno dip his head down to Rufus's chest. "I'd love t'fuck your brains out," he whispers, but that doesn't seem wise and he doesn't pursue the idea. He sucks Rufus's right nipple, bites it, flicks it with his tongue, and Rufus gives the most agonizingly beautiful cry.

Rufus finally comes again, slowly, sweetly, his erection trapped between his pelvis and Reno's and manipulated by deliberate revolutions of Reno's hips. It seems to take forever to ease over the edge, and he's biting Reno's shoulder when it finally happens. Reno growls, taking as much pleasure in Rufus's pleasure as in his own; there's just _something_ about the stickiness of Rufus's skin, and the dampness in his hair, the smell of him in Reno's nostrils.

In the limp aftermath, Reno brings Rufus's arms back around and presses the VP's hands to his own erection, and uses Rufus to bring about his own orgasm. Rufus does not resist; Reno moves his hands into position and Rufus clasps them, and a minute or so later there is fluid dripping between his palms and onto his belly.

Rufus understands now - he's sweaty, hot, smeared in semen and saliva, _messed up._ It feels amazing.

He doesn't go in to the office that day.

Reno leaves marks on his body. The next morning Rufus examines them in the mirror: red, like fresh bruises, but painless and small. His wrists are a little red, too, from being held down. He chooses a black turtleneck to wear, to conceal the marks; it's a good thing Junon is cold this time of year.

His white coat does not wipe these marks away. When Rufus catches sight of himself in a window, he can see them in his mind, under his clothes, and he likes it.


	3. AVALANCHE

AVALANCHE has some kind of plot involving the Mako Cannon. Rufus assists them, and only discovers at the last minute, when the plan is already underway and the Cannon is in AVALANCHE hands, that the goal is to turn the Cannon on Midgar and destroy the city. Half-panicked, Rufus demands the plans for the Cannon's mount and summons the commander of the local army garrison. _Is it actually possible to pivot the Cannon that far!?_ It's not designed to turn that sharply, but nobody can say it will be impossible. Rufus is beside himself.

SOLDIER is scrambled and Sephiroth is flown in to lead the assault. More Turks arrive with him. There is fighting in the streets, and Rufus watches from his high office window, appalled. Had he known what they were planning, _had he known._

Sephiroth rousts AVALANCHE from the Mako Cannon before anyone can find out if it will actually pivot that far. He then lectures the local garrison commander, in front of Rufus, about basic security measures and intelligence leaks, and gives Rufus a few disappointed glances throughout. When he says, "I would have expected better from someone in your position," Rufus realizes that the lecture is actually for _him,_ and it simply can't be directed at him straight because of who he is and who Sephiroth is.

He's humiliated and furious. _How dare he!?_ But he can't say anything to Sephiroth, because the fiction that it is the army commander being reprimanded must be maintained. Once Sephiroth leaves, Rufus stalks out of the room and returns to his condo, where he throws a chair into a wall and smashes every breakable object in the kitchen. Reno, two paces behind him coming in the door, stands in silence while Rufus destroys the crockery, and then afterward he cleans it up without a word.

When he next contacts AVALANCHE, Rufus demands that they clear their schemes with him _first_ from this point forward. They refuse, unless he finally agrees to identify himself and meet with them; they aren't going to give a nameless supporter, no matter how valuable, veto power over their affairs. Rufus, fuming, hangs up on his contact and decides to write the whole thing off. As his temper is cooling, however, a storm front moves across Junon and his wrist aches and aches. The pain is a goad, troubles him, reminds him of his original motives.

The next day he calls back and agrees to meet with an AVALANCHE leader. It's tricky to slip away from his ever-present escorts, but there are four Turks in Junon at the moment and Rufus plays them off one another, so that each one is sure that he's with a different one. Rufus is apprehensive about exposing himself this way - he doesn't really want AVALANCHE to be able to identify him, not to mention that he can't remember the last time he was out in public without a Turk nearby - but does he have a choice? He makes sure he is adequately armed before he meets up with his contact and is led to the AVALANCHE leader.

Fuhito does not look especially surprised to discover that his mysterious, highly-placed informant in Shinra is the President's son. He and Rufus meet for an hour. It doesn't take long for Rufus to realize that Fuhito is a zealot when it comes this stupid ecology thing, and Rufus puts on his most agreeable mask, saying all the right words to make Fuhito believe that they share a point of view. _When I take over, Mako energy will be immediately phased out, and the Shinra Electric Power Company will make amends for what it has done to the planet. I swear it._

He threatens - tactfully, but it is still a threat - to withdraw all of his support and aid if AVALANCHE ever again pulls an operation without his approval. He knows that he is funding most, if not all, of AVALANCHE's budget by this point, and although they seem to have more than one sympathizer within Shinra, no other could possibly have even close to Rufus's access. He has clout, and he uses it to extract what he needs.

Fuhito responds even better than expected; he is accommodating and perfectly willing to follow Rufus's instructions henceforth. Rufus leaves the meeting confident that AVALANCHE will be tractable from now on, and there will be no more _incidents_ like the Mako Cannon.

Now that Rufus no longer has to conceal his identity, he is able to tell AVALANCHE outright what will and will not work, without having to justify how he arrived at this judgment; he can also give them precise and detailed data whenever they need it to carry out an action. He can even call them straight from his own PHS without worrying that he is exposing himself, which turns out to be extremely convenient. A week later the Turks are still in Junon, investigating the Cannon job, and to get rid of them Rufus gives AVALANCHE a call and tells the terrorists to infiltrate the Shinra Tower and create some havoc in the Science Department.

He does not advise them to assassinate his father while they are in the building, but knows they might. While the operation is in progress, Rufus takes his dinner in the private room of a skyview restaurant at the top of Junon, gazing out to sea while Reno flirts with the waitstaff and Rude stands next to the door intimidating the other guests. He picks at his food; a bit of nauseated anticipation chews at his stomach. He knows, when Reno receives a call that makes his face turn serious, that AVALANCHE has been discovered, and his insides twist harder. He can't name the feeling.

Reno comes over to him to deliver a whispered report, and Rude leaves. Rufus sets down his fork. He does not have to feign being upset; he is genuinely upset, and conceals it the way he always does. "Keep me advised," he tells Reno in a low tone.

No assassination takes place. It turns out that Rufus's father isn't even in the building at the time. Two Turks are injured but none killed; the only significant casualties are some security personnel. Rufus is relieved when he gets the damage report, and he tells himself that he was worried only about his Turks.

His primary objective, at least, is obtained: the Turks leave Junon, except for Reno, who remains to watch over Rufus.

* * *

There are frequent sexual encounters between Rufus and his Turk. Reno never directly initiates; he drops casual remarks when he's in the mood, and leaves it to Rufus to decide if he wants to engage or not. It seems at first like he's _always_ in the mood, but eventually Rufus attempts to draw him in when he isn't, and is rebuffed. Reno is gentle about it, but it stings anyway, and it's a week before Rufus is willing to drop his prickly umbrage over it.

After three months, Reno broaches the possibility of penetrative sex. He whispers his proposal into Rufus's ear when they are naked together and Rufus is halfway to orgasm, and generally open to suggestion. This one immediately repulses him, and Reno drops it without further comment. The idea becomes lodged in Rufus's mind, however, and he thinks about it often.

Occasionally Reno is rough, showing his strength, forcing Rufus to comply. Rufus knows that the force will be withdrawn if he ever voices an objection, but he never does; these moods of Reno's are potent. Once, Reno binds Rufus's wrists behind his back with one of his ties, and tells him ruthlessly that he won't be released until he's come at least three times, then carries through on the threat.

The intense intimacy causes a lot of insecurity for Rufus at first, but Reno is somehow able to absolutely compartmentalize his own feelings and that helps resolve the problem. When his mouth is on Rufus's skin, Reno is passionate and eager; when he's dressed and standing upright, he's respectful and professional. The stark contrast between these two facets of Reno and the sharp line that divides them prompt Rufus to respond in kind. Before long, the switch is reflexive and automatic. They are employer and employee in public, and lovers only in private, and not even always then. Reno sleeps on the couch, never in Rufus's bed.

Rufus decides that he must start dating. Had he never taken up with Reno, the thought probably would never have crossed his mind, but he _has_ taken up with Reno and he decides that he requires some cover. He feels fairly safe from discovery in Junon, but the idea of what his father might do if he finds out is terrifying. There must be no possibility that his father finds out.

So Rufus has Reno do some background checks on the eligible young women of Junon, and he starts to date a few. None refuse his offer; he is in the flower of young adulthood, physically attractive with elegant manners, heir to half of Gaia, and can tap the seemingly bottomless Shinra Corporation bank accounts more or less at will and with impunity. He wines and dines them, kisses them, charms them, feigns deep interest in whatever interests them, and dazzles them with his power to summon a helicopter whenever he likes to ferry himself and his date to anywhere in the world. His constant Turk escort, with that air of lethality that always follows a Turk, lends him a certain dangerous mystique.

Rufus makes out with three of them on different occasions, but it doesn't advance as far as sex. He wants it to, and they seem to want it to, but ... they are soft, weak, and they smell of perfume (musk, lavender, rose). They are deferent to him, but not in the way he wants. They're willing to let him do whatever he likes, and are not sufficiently bold with him to express their own desires. He thinks that femininity will be arousing, and in a way it is, but ... but.

So he takes each one home un-ravished and then goes home himself, and his Turk escort goes down on him, and makes him scream a little, and he twists his hands in the man's wiry red hair.

Junon is farther from the chocobo stable than Midgar, and Rufus is often out of town on business anyway. As a consequence he is riding less often than he used to - once a week when he can, sometimes every other week. He assigns Sunny's trainer to keep her in shape, and tells himself that he'll have his schedule arranged to make more time for his chocobo. He never quite gets around to that.

Rufus turns twenty in Junon, and decides to throw himself an enormous party. Just because it is outrageous and impractical, the central party is scheduled to be held on the top mounting of the Mako Cannon, but Rufus ensures that there will be a street festival as well so that the common folk can celebrate with him. Reno reminds him that there is another town below Junon, and as an afterthought Rufus arranges to send some food and liquor down to the fishing village.

The event is a security nightmare, and Reno calls in some colleagues from the home office to assist. The alcohol alone costs a small fortune. Rufus's father notices, and announces that he will attend.

Rufus is meeting with the party planners when he learns who has been added to the guest list. He loses his composure for a moment, but hides it and no one notices. His wrist starts to ache later that evening, and he rubs it irritably.

President Shinra lands in Junon a week before Rufus's birthday, and, weirdly, Lazard is with him. He is jovial and seems to be in a good mood, but Rufus takes no chances and ensures that he is never alone with the man. It works, sort of. He has a condo, but his father can hardly stay in it with him, and there is no reason for him to stay with his father in the hotel suite. He practically clings to Reno, won't let Reno out of his sight. When he is invited to join his father for dinner two days before his birthday, he brings along one of his lady friends, for protection.

That heavy weight that left him when he came to Junon returns.

He makes a terrible mistake.

He calls on AVALANCHE to make a direct strike against his father in Junon.

* * *

The Turks somehow get wind that something is going down, but learn too late to do anything about security except coordinate with SOLIDER to post more personnel around the premises. When the AVALANCHE operatives reveal themselves an hour into the party (many of them arrive disguised as waitstaff, having disposed of the security-cleared staff) there is a near-stampede as Rufus's guests panic. The Turks scramble, and when it becomes clear that Rufus's father is the only target, they all abandon Rufus to guard the President. It's a stunning moment for Rufus when every one of his Turks leaves him. Even Reno.

Lazard appears at Rufus's side, grabs him and pulls him out of the line of fire. "We have to get out of here," he says.

Rufus goes with him. A member of AVALANCHE attacks them, and Rufus is not too stunned to raise his shotgun from under his coat and pull the trigger. It's the first time he's killed someone with his own hands, but he doesn't have time to think about it. He steps over the body with Lazard and they run through the streets that bracket the Cannon, finally ducking into a building.

"Great Gaia," says Lazard, standing at the window. The chaos outside - people running in all directions, members of AVALANCHE killing people apparently at random, the glow of magic from the place where the Turks headed - makes it impossible to see what's happening. Lazard turns to Rufus. There's a little blood splattered on him, probably from the woman Rufus killed. "Well. This is one hell of a birthday present."

It's then that Rufus sees it. Maybe it's the way Lazard's hair is ruffled from the run, or the way the light strikes him from behind, streaming in through the window, casting shadows. His eyes. The shape of his nose and chin. His face is a bit more square than Rufus's own, his features less delicate.

Rufus looks away. He can't deal with this right now. "We should probably get away from the window," he says, and they move deeper into the building.

AVALANCHE fails. President Shinra is successfully protected by SOLDIER and the Turks. That doesn't stop him from blaming both organizations for the massive cock-up. Lazard, as head of SOLDIER, catches hell the next morning. He takes it the way any Shinra employee might, with abject apologies, promises to uncover what went wrong and deal with it, assurances that whoever screwed up will be dealt with. There is no indication in his manner that he fears for his personal safety.

Rufus is, in his father's eyes at least, still the head of the Department of Administrative Research. For him, there are no shouted words, no profanity, at least not in public. "You've been up all night, haven't you?" says the President gently, putting an arm around his son. "Let's head back to the hotel and get some breakfast."

"Yes, father," says Rufus, and he is five years old again, knowing that there is nothing he can do. He is frightened and completely powerless, and he knows that if he _cries_ it will only provoke his father more. He allows his father to guide him toward the car.

He catches the look in Lazard's eyes as they leave, and will never forget the barely-disguised, raw _jealousy_ he sees there.

* * *

In the hotel penthouse suite, there are shouted words, and profanity. A table and a chair are broken. So are Rufus's much-abused left wrist and four of his ribs. At one point his father descends into such madness that Rufus is struck, four times, across the back of the head with a stone paperweight.

The horrifying thing is that it becomes clear almost immediately that his father _doesn't even know about Rufus's involvement._ He blames Rufus for the Turks' failure to ascertain and neutralize the risk behind the scenes, before it became a manifest threat. He blames Rufus for throwing such an extravagant event in the first place and practically waving a red flag. He blames Rufus for being such a _fuck up_ and such an _idiot_ and such a disappointment, and what did he ever do to deserve such a pathetic excuse for a son. He blames Rufus for being born. Rufus is a convenient, accustomed and familiar outlet for his fury.

Rufus doesn't cry. He knows that if he does, it will be worse, so much worse. He ends up crumpled on the floor in agony, gasping with the effort to _breathe,_ and his father demands furiously if he is _crying._ Rufus is able to respond with an even voice, "No, father. I'm not."

President Shinra has a few drinks of whiskey. This calms him a little, but it also makes him more dangerous and Rufus reminds himself to be cautious, be _submissive._ The President does not apologize to his son, but he says, "I ... I know you haven't been over the Turks for a while," and then, "I'm under a lot of pressure right now. You really don't understand how much hell this terrorist group is causing for us." He takes a sip of whiskey. "I know you saw last quarter's reports, but this quarter is going to be _even worse."_

"Yes, father," says Rufus, from the floor, trying to breathe, trying to think. His head feels like it's splitting and he wonders if he is concussed again. It seems impossible that it might be otherwise. Wouldn't it be delightful, he thinks, if he is bleeding inside his skull? Maybe his father has killed him and it's just a matter of time before his body gets the memo.

"Veld keeps saying that someone in the company is leaking information to them." Another sip, finishing off the glass. The President pours himself another. "But he can't track it down. He's as much of a fuck-up as you are. It's no wonder you and the Turks get on so well." Then he leans down and angrily pulls Rufus up by the arm. "Stand up, you worthless little shit. What would your mother say about you, laying on the floor like a rag?" There is a sharp note in his voice.

Standing up is one of the hardest things Rufus has ever done, but he does it, and he forces himself to hold himself straight; he has to take very small and very shallow breaths to make it work. The change in position aggravates his headache and the pain nearly blinds him. He lets his left arm fall to his side, to ease the pain in his broken wrist. He's lightheaded and somewhat dizzy, and perhaps he isn't seeing quite straight either because his father looks like he might actually be concerned. "You okay, boy?" the man asks.

"Yes, father." He isn't, but at the moment all he wants is to get out of there, and pretending to be fine seems like the fastest way to accomplish that.

The President slaps Rufus on the shoulder, and almost topples him right off his feet. "Of course you are," he says, and then he walks away and knocks back his glass of whiskey. "Of course you are. Nothing wrong with you. Go, uh ... go get yourself cleaned up and, and get some sleep."

Rufus finally escapes, and in the elevator he runs a hand carefully over his hair to make sure he isn't _visibly_ bleeding. His head throbs but he doesn't feel any dampness. His hand shakes.

Downstairs he has the limo called around, and when it stops in front of the hotel Reno gets out of it and opens the door for him. Rufus stands dead still just outside the hotel door; he can pretend to be all right as long as he doesn't move. As soon as he tries to take a step, Reno will know.

The Turk glances around as the delay drags on, and then says, "You comin', sir?"

Rufus wonders what kind of options he has. He's not thinking properly at the moment, and his mind seems to be working at about quarter speed. Can he go back inside? Tell Reno he's changed his mind and is staying at the hotel? What? He winds up just staring stupidly for a good minute or so, until he comes to the understanding that he simply has to walk over there and get in.

He holds himself with as much dignity as he can, although he's sure he looks awful. A trickle of wetness starts to go down the back of his head, and he reaches up to catch it before it reaches his collar.

As soon as both men are inside the limo and the doors are closed, Reno starts to say something and Rufus speaks up first to cut him off. "I fell down the stairs," he says. His voice is thready; he can't truly inhale, and he feels very off. The world around him just doesn't seem quite right, as though there's another, identical world transposed over it. He rests his left arm on his lap, and observes red marks on his broken wrist without really comprehending them. "I'd ... really like to see some materia. Tell me you have some."

Reno is silent, and Rufus does not look at him; he seems to have finally caught Reno at a loss. Eventually Reno hits the switch to lower the divider to the driver and directs her to take them to the army garrison. Once the car is underway and the divider is back up, Reno says, "You, ah ... you gonna be all right, sir?"

"Yes. It was ..." Rufus swallows. "Just a stupid clumsy accident."

At the garrison, Reno pops inside to grab some materia and a couple of potions from the infirmary, and uses the materia on Rufus in the car as they return to the condo. It's painful - it's always painful, and nauseating, to feel the raw edges of bone forced back together with brute force magic - but Rufus endures it because he must. Reno helps him out of the limo, gracefully, making it look like he is just giving Rufus a hand out of courtesy. Rufus's fingers leave a brick-red trace on the Turk's palm.

Rufus expects some kind of confrontation when they get inside the condo, but when Reno starts talking it's about the AVALANCHE attack. The terrorists went straight for the President, but seemed to be trying to kidnap him instead of kill him, which made it much easier to thwart than a pure assassination attempt would have been. Reno tells him this while he helps Rufus get his coat off and examines it for damage, and then arranges the potions on the coffee table.

"Reno," says Rufus, interrupting and not looking at the man. "Promise me something."

"Yeah, sir?"

"Don't ever leave me alone again."

There's a moment of uncomfortable silence, and then Reno says, "I can't promise that. You know that, sir."

Rufus does know it. He picks up one of the potions and turns it around in his hand, and drinks it. He does not ask again.

* * *

Rufus's father wants him to come back to Midgar. Rufus doesn't refuse - he _can't_ refuse - but he says that he will as soon as a few things are cleaned up in Junon. Junon is in shambles, after all. Many of Junon's notables were killed, and not all of them were successfully revived. The local economy has taken a major hit. Junon is an important Shinra shipping port and Rufus should not leave it in disarray.

His father returns to Midgar without him, but Rufus knows he's now on borrowed time.

His wrist has to be wrapped for a week, and he has headaches that come and go. Sometimes his dreams leave him drenched in cold sweat; the woman from AVALANCHE that he shot keeps coming back to him. Twice he is subject to momentary rages that come upon him without warning and last only seconds, when he hears something that just makes him snap for an instant. The first time he smashes a coffee cup at a restaurant; the second time he flings his PHS violently at Reno.

He contemplates what to do about AVALANCHE. He's seething inside that they didn't simply kill his father as they'd been instructed, but realizes that furious demands aren't likely to get him very far. Finally he decides to approach them with terse questions instead of anger. _Why didn't you just kill him? Why try to capture him? Is there something I should know?_

He is told that they were going to try to extract information out of the President before killing him. Rufus has to pretend to believe it, but he doesn't, and he wonders what their real motives were. Their next big strike is going to be against a Mako reactor, but Rufus talks them out of it; they've already hit reactors in Midgar twice, and he's seen the damage it did to revenues. He wants to inherit the company, not ruin it. He talks them instead into attacking the Shinra space program.

It pains him, a little, to wield the group against the space program; something inside him still remembers the wonder he felt as his first tutor explained the way the planets move through the depths of space. The space program, however, is a purely sunk cost, and unless the President tries stupidly to replace it, the destruction of that giant phallic rocket will have next to no impact on the balance sheet.

The program can always be restarted later, or so Rufus tells himself.

There will be a rocket launch in four months. The President will almost certainly be there; he always attends the launches, no matter how many times the rockets fail. Rufus gives AVALANCHE as much information as he has about the planned ceremony, and tells them to be sure they _nail_ the old man this time.

He begins to take extended business trips, and when he returns home, it's to his home in Junon that he goes. Sooner or later his father is going to tell him, outright, to come back to Midgar, but Rufus isn't going to budge until that occurs.

He's in Mideel, trying to obtain lumber access to the island's vast forests, when shocking news comes through that has nothing at all to do with AVALANCHE. Sephiroth, it seems, has gone off the rails, destroyed a village, and been killed. The news is to be hushed; Sephiroth is much beloved by the populace, and it cannot get out that Shinra can lose control its SOLDIERs. The Turks are dispatched to the little podunk town that Sephiroth got it into his head to level, and Rufus wraps up negotiations quickly so that he can go run damage control.

By the time he gets there, Hojo is already on the scene and has taken command; he's talking about some kind of experiment he wants to run here. Rufus sees no reason to interfere, and doesn't. The town is truly flattened - Sephiroth does nothing halfway - and Rufus realizes quickly that this can only be kept under wraps just so long.

It's a disaster. A disaster.

"We'll rebuild it," he decides, after a few days of frantic calculations and brainstorming. "Make it look like it did before. Nobody outside will be able to prove a difference."

Veld is skeptical, but doesn't argue. "Yes, sir. What about the population? It can't be left empty."

"Ship in some villagers. Put them on the payroll and tell them to pretend to be from here." Rufus thinks a little. "Maybe some people from the slums in Midgar. They should be happy to get out from under the plate. Post a couple of Turks here for a while to keep them in line, until they get their stories straight."

It's a direct order, and Veld follows direct orders; nevertheless, Rufus can see that he doesn't think this is going to work. Rufus doesn't really think it will work, either, but it will give Shinra plausible deniability and that's all the company will need to maintain control of the news.

He stays to oversee the start of rebuilding, and resides in the Shinra Mansion, mainly because it is the only intact structure left. The Mansion is dreary and gray at the best of times, and as Hojo sets up his experiment queer sounds sometimes drift directionlessly through the building. Rufus is curious, in a morbid and disturbed kind of way, but deliberately shows no overt interest. It wouldn't do for Hojo to get the idea that Rufus wants to know more about his activities.

Most of the Turks return to Midgar. Tseng remains behind, as do Reno and Rude. Contractors are brought in and begin construction. Rufus keeps the number of involved people as low as possible, and tells Tseng to ensure that no word of the reconstruction leaves the town. Tseng understands what that means.

Then the launch date of the damned rocket comes up. Rufus has been completely unable to get in touch with AVALANCHE since he got to Nibelheim, but he doubts it will matter; he gave them sufficient instructions and plenty of money before this Sephiroth nonsense arose. He asks Tseng if his father will be at the launch, and is told that he will.

Hopefully, this time, the thrice-damned terrorists can pull off a simple assassination.

If they don't ... Rufus doesn't even want to think about what might happen if they don't.

* * *

The rocket launch site is not too far from Nibelheim, and Rufus is able to delay the trip until the morning of the event. His father is not yet there when he arrives, so Rufus watches the locals practice the airshow, gives a brief interview for one of the networks, and wastes time. The place is swarming with Turks, and one of them follows him around, one of the new hires. Rufus wonders where AVALANCHE is.

An entire little town has been set up around the launch site, built mostly of ugly prefab metal trailers, and the rocket itself towers over the landscape. For a little while, Rufus just wanders around looking at things. It's a lovely day with beautiful weather. Everyone recognizes him on sight, and everyone is willing and eager to engage him in conversation if he shows the slightest inclination. They are all Shinra employees - physical scientists, technicians and logistical support - and Rufus quickly gets the impression that they are all here simply because this is something they love. This is a dream they all have, to reach space, just in order to do it and see what is there.

Rufus smiles and talks with them, and is as pleasant as he can be given that he is quickly coming to despise them. A low kind of growling fury is building in him, that _these_ people are allowed to seek their dreams, their impractical, profitless dreams, when _he_ ...

He retreats to the observation platform to get away from all of the glowing people and their disgusting optimism. His Turk escort does not pick up on his mood until she chatters a bit to him about how amazing it all is, and he has to slap her down with an observation about what an _expensive_ and _pointless_ boondoggle this is, really.

He'll be _happy_ when this rocket goes up in flames ... or whatever AVALANCHE has planned for it.

Mid-morning his father arrives, along with several executives and with a vast media retinue in tow, and the President is in a terrific mood. He hugs his son and is genuinely happy to see him again after a long separation. "Good thinking on Nibelheim," his father tells him with one arm around him, under his breath, for Rufus's ears only.

"What are we doing about Sephiroth's disappearance?" asks Rufus in the same low tones.

"Nothing yet. Once Nibelheim is put back together he'll be killed in action, or something. We'll figure it out later. We're not going to announce his death for a little while, so it won't be as easy for people to connect it to anything strange in Nibelheim."

Rufus nods, and says, "We should announce he's going overseas, then, so it won't look strange that he isn't in the papers for a few months."

His father smiles and pats him proudly on the shoulder. "You're going to make a great president someday. We're already on top of that, but I'm glad you thought of it, too."

The praise lights something within Rufus. "Thank you, father."

When his father moves away, the light goes out and a queasy feeling plucks instead at his insides. He hides it, smiling and playing the role of dutiful child for the many cameras that are on them right now.

The attack turns out to be nothing like Rufus had expected. In fact, it initially looks like there is going to be no attack at all; everything seems to go as planned and the countdown on the rocket begins. Rufus, not even aware that he had tensed with anxiety, feels himself slowly relax. Then Rude approaches them on the observation platform and whispers into the President's ear, and the man's face darkens, and Rufus knows something is going down.

It's only later that Rufus learns what AVALANCHE actually does to the rocket. At that moment, he sees only the rocket firing up toward liftoff, beginning to leave the ground ... and then something occurs and the fires go out, and the rocket slams back down to earth with an almighty crunch of metal and a vast billowing cloud of smoke and dust. The shock front hits the observation platform, and Rufus turns and raises an arm to shield his face.

When the air clears, Rufus is covered in grime and his father is livid. Beyond livid. But he's on camera and he knows it, so he restrains himself and merely sends a technician running to find out what the _hell_ is going on. Rufus slinks away, finds a Turk, and asks for a report.

They know almost nothing right at that moment, and the exchange is interrupted anyway by the screaming of metal from the launch pad. The rocket begins to tip, and people begin to run. Rufus, although he is not in the rocket's shadow, is evacuated anyway. He, his father, and the rest of the Shinra management reconvene a couple of kilometers from the site.

There they get the story as the rocket gradually tilts farther and farther out of true. AVALANCHE sabotaged some kind of component within the rocket and the techs were too slow in repairing it. The pilot aborted the liftoff because one of the techs was still in the rocket and was about to be killed by the engine heat. Rude, the Turk who issues the report, mentions nothing about the President being targeted.

Rufus walks away, furious.

* * *

He must now return to Midgar. He has no other options. His father tells him that he's coming back, and so Rufus goes back. As he arrives in Midgar, he feels like he's arriving at his own funeral.

He moves back into the family suite, and the first few days are bad. Having lived practically alone for almost a year, Rufus has developed some habits that are not compatible with his father's routine, and for the same reason his father is even less tolerant of Rufus than he had been before. Everything Rufus does is an irritation to the man.

However, it's only shouting, and a little manhandling. His father does not strike him, and hasn't since the attack in Junon on Rufus's birthday. He does not grab Rufus by the wrist and fling him into anything, either. Rufus gets only a few bruises on his arms, and there are no broken bones or any threat that that might recur.

Sometimes he sees Reno around the building. The Turk is always solicitous, asking how Rufus is doing, even if they saw one another just yesterday. Rufus exchanges pleasantries, and tells him nothing more. Reno pretends that their relationship is purely professional. Once, Rufus tries to, backhandedly, suggest a tryst, but Reno talks over him and refuses to let him complete the thought.

Thinking about it later, Rufus understands that the Turk is protecting him, but that doesn't resolve his growing frustration. He's stuck jacking off in the shower again.

Rufus finally gets back in touch with AVALANCHE, although it's difficult to do it without leaving traces. Not only does his contact have no excuses for him as to why they didn't simply kill his father at the launch, he also conveys that they again plan to hit a reactor. Rufus orders them outright not to do it, and his contact says the message will be passed.

As Rufus re-adjusts to living at home, things improve quite a lot. He starts waking up early again, and stops staying out late and leaving personal items laying around, and his father screams at him less and talks to him civilly more often. Rufus is even able to convince the man not to build another rocket. The rocket that just failed was number twenty-six; the damned things are damned expensive, and the whole program is going nowhere. The President is reluctant to abandon the project altogether, but does agree that it would be prudent to downsize to something more manageable.

The Space Research Department gets a funding cut, and is renamed the Department of Space Development, just to drive home to Palmer that the goal is profit, not the bare satisfaction of curiosity, or making _dreams come true_ for random Shinra employees. The success makes Rufus think that perhaps this isn't so terrible. All he needs to do is stay out of his father's way, be a good and obedient son, and the explosions won't occur. They can even cooperate, come to agreements.

Maybe they can be a family again.

Rufus gets home late one evening and his father has already had dinner but is still awake. He is called into the library, where he is required to explain why he wasn't home earlier; he was reviewing an appropriation request from Scarlet to set up a new weapons development project. The explanation is accepted and his father is satisfied.

Instead of leaving, Rufus loiters in the doorway, and then asks, "Do you hate me?"

His father, about to take a sip from a glass of whiskey, freezes for an instant. Then he says, his voice gruff, "Of course not. What gave you that fool idea?"

The litany of reasons that Rufus could present is so vast that he has no idea where to start, and he doesn't really want to risk setting his father off anyway. This was stupid; he should never have said that.

But before he can say anything else, even to excuse himself and leave the room, his father says, "I've always loved you, Rufus. I know I've been hard on you." He turns around to face his son. "I'm not the best father, am I?"

"You do the best you can." It's true.

"I could do better. You don't really get how hard it's been to build up this company, especially when you were small." He reaches for a second glass and pours two fingers of whiskey. "I know you don't pay attention to shit like this, but I'm always on television so that the public know that Shinra is on their side, and that's on top of everything the business needs."

He holds out the glass to Rufus. When Rufus hesitates, his father frowns and says, "Don't tell me you didn't have any liquor in that house in Junon."

So Rufus takes the glass, takes a sip, and when his father tells him to sit down he does that too. "We haven't always gotten along," says his father, "but you have to know I've always loved you. Everything I've ever done, has been for you."

"I know, Dad." This, too, is true. His father has given him a good life. He's never lacked for anything, and he has a bright future ahead of him. He knows that he will have a hand in crafting the shape of the world itself, just as his father has shaped it up to now. Rufus looks down into the liquor, and says, "Maybe ... Can we take some time off sometime soon? Go back to Costa del Sol, maybe, or that big amusement park they built near Corel."

"Sure." The agreement is easy, and his father's tone is generous. "Maybe next month. I'll have my secretary check the schedule and we'll come up with something."

Rufus finishes his whiskey, smiles, and thinks, _This is all I ever wanted._

* * *

Lazard is gone. It takes a while for Rufus to notice; he doesn't go out of his way to look for the man. It eventually dawns on him, though, that Lazard is never in the executive meetings that Rufus must again attend. He's not sure why this irritates him, because Lazard's mere existence is a positive outrage and having to look at him would surely be worse. But it does irritate him. Rufus asks Tseng, and Tseng tells him that Lazard took off one day and nobody knows why or where he went. The matter is under investigation, but this AVALANCHE thing is taking up so much manpower that the Turks have not been able to launch a dedicated inquiry.

Tseng does not ask why Rufus wants to know, nor why this answer seems to frustrate the young VP. Rufus thinks about confronting the Turk, _why didn't you tell me, how long did you know, how could you,_ but decides it would be pointless. He already knows why Tseng didn't tell him.

There's no way he can confront his father about it, either, although he wants to, desperately. _Why did you do it, how could you do this to us, why, why, why._ He learns to set this aside, because it riles him inside and he doesn't want to trigger conflict. Not now, not when they are finally getting along. Still. Still. Sometimes he fantasizes about demanding answers, demanding remorse for the betrayal. But Rufus is not about to endanger this delicate truce he has negotiated with his father. Not even for this.

They decide to go neither to Costa del Sol, nor to the Gold Saucer, but instead to take a trip to Wutai. Shinra has rehabilitated its enemy, and the economy of the conquered nation is beginning to recover. President Shinra thinks that it will not only be an interesting place to visit, but that a high-profile trip there will be great publicity and will encourage tourism. He wants Wutai to be a prosperous, thriving client state, not a broken ruin.

Rufus agrees, and they make plans.

By now, he is positively thankful that AVALANCHE never got around to killing his father, and he regrets terribly having ever tried to make that happen. The man is _his father._ Even when Rufus annoys him, even when something sets him off, Rufus can see that he's making an effort. He's trying not to shout, not to grab his son by the wrist and _grip_ and _twist._ He doesn't always keep his temper in check, but he's trying. He's trying. Rufus owes it to him to meet him at least halfway.

Rufus has no idea what he's going to do about AVALANCHE, at all. Fuhito knows who he is, and no doubt many other members of the group do as well. If Rufus tries to back out, they could threaten to expose him and would have no reason not to carry through.

Probably, he is going to have to get rid of them in some way. It's hard to imagine a way to do that without risking exposure, but Rufus starts to give it some serious consideration.

In the meantime, he worries. He doubts AVALANCHE is going to do as he tells them; he seems to have lost control of them, if he ever had it in the first place. They've taken his gil and his information, and they've followed his instructions when it was in their interests and done as they wished otherwise. They're going to strike at Shinra again, probably soon, and he needs to stop them.

They're going to make his father angry when they strike. They're going to ruin everything Rufus has accomplished. The worry gnaws at him, gives him pains in the stomach, and disrupts his sleep.

* * *

AVALANCHE does not obey him. They decide to attack the Mako reactor that has been recently completed in Corel. They contact him shortly before they are ready to proceed, not out of courtesy, but because they want the reactor's floor plans and information about its security systems. Rufus thinks about telling the Turks, or even turning out the army, but can't come up with a reason why he would have this kind of intel legitimately. He thinks about dropping an anonymous tip, but they wouldn't take it seriously enough, not enough to act on it as fast as they would have to. And he can't let AVALANCHE just go through with this unchallenged.

He has to stop this attack, somehow. He paces his bedroom after the call with AVALANCHE, trying to think, trying to come up with _some_ way to head this off. The trip to Wutai happens in two weeks.

He recalls meeting with Fuhito in Junon. The AVALANCHE leader had been amenable when they'd spoken. Maybe ... maybe Rufus's instructions just aren't getting through. He seizes on this thought, even though his better sense tells him it isn't true. Maybe if he is able to directly talk to Fuhito, he can head off this attack. Or delay it. Just until after the Wutai trip. Although, what he will be able to do differently after the Wutai trip is unclear to him.

He's in a trap of his own making, wrestling with a monster that he helped to create, and he can find no way out. Later, he will have to admit to himself that maybe, in some way, he wants to be caught. To have someone else find out what he's done, and sort out this situation for him because he can't sort it out on his own.

He slips out of the building without calling for a Turk to escort him, and makes his way to the army depot outside the Sector Five reactor. There he commandeers a chopper and a pilot to fly him out to Corel. It's easy; he's the Vice President. No questions are asked. He tells them not to file a flight plan, and they don't.

As Rufus watches Midgar dwindle out the helicopter window, Veld is reviewing security footage that has just been brought to him. Rufus hadn't even bothered to change into something less conspicuous before leaving. He's easy to spot walking straight out one of the building's side doors.

"Damn," says Veld. He hadn't wanted to be right.

* * *

Rufus can see smoke at the Mako reactor from ten kilometers away, but it's still standing when he gets there; the smoke turns out to be coming from a destroyed train on the tracks just outside it. So there's still time to save it. He directs the pilot to land just outside the reactor grounds; he can already visualize the massive dent this is going to put into the quarterly revenue report if he doesn't save the reactor.

He doesn't want to visualize how furious it will make his father.

The pilot wants to accompany him after they land, and initially won't take no for an answer. He's not a SOLDIER, just regular army, but he's determined not to let the Vice President wander around a clearly dangerous area unescorted. Rufus tells him to stay put twice; when he is twice defied his nerves snap and he flips, screams at the pilot to _do as you're fucking told_ and only regains control of himself when he's got his shotgun in the man's mouth and his finger is twitching on the trigger.

"I'm under a lot of stress right now," he tells the pilot, and he surprises himself with how calm his voice is. "I don't need any more. Okay?"

This time, the terrified pilot agrees to remain with the chopper and wait for Rufus to return.

Rufus is challenged as he approaches the reactor by AVALANCHE's perimeter guard, but he's a valued ally and they let him through when he identifies himself. There are a bunch of AVALANCHE inside the reactor's main generator room, setting charges. Fuhito is with them, and he greets Rufus as though they are good friends. Rufus demands to know what they think they are doing, and Fuhito launches into his ecology bullshit again, talking about how this is for the good of the Planet, and the Planet is dying, and people are killing it, and yada yada, all the same sorts of fanatic things he said before but this time he has a mad glint in his eye that Rufus doesn't like.

_Don't raise your voice,_ Rufus tells himself, and with great effort he keeps control of his tone. "You can't do this," he says, as reasonably as he can. He knows he's surrounded by terrorists and this is probably not the place to do this, but he can't just let them blow up another reactor! And they do need him. He's funding practically everything for them now. "Listen, I can help you sabotage it. We'll keep it from going online."

"The Planet ..." says Fuhito, and Rufus interrupts him.

"If you blow it up outright, my father will just build another one! Don't _destroy_ it, just fuck it up!"

"You don't get it, do you?" asks an AVALANCHE member.

Mainly, Rufus gets that this operation of theirs is going to rip away from him everything he wants and values, and it needs to stop. "If you blow up this reactor," Rufus begins, but before he can finish what is probably an ill advised threat, an alarm goes up amongst the terrorists.

A few minutes later the source of the alarm becomes clear when five Turks fight their way into the generator room.

Rufus's mind goes completely blank when he catches sight of their blue suits. Not here. Not _now._

He's not entirely sure what makes him say it. Maybe it's the only way he can think of, on an instant's notice, to salvage what has suddenly become a clusterfuck. Maybe it's because he hasn't previously, and can't now, come up with a way to bring the Turks over to his side without implicating himself. Maybe it's because the first Turk he sees is Trig, whom he has barely met and doesn't really care about.

Maybe it's because he and his father have been getting along, finally, and he will do anything to keep that out of jeopardy. Whatever it takes to cover up what he's done. Concealing his treachery is suddenly far more important than saving the reactor, far more important than _anything._

Regardless of the reason, he smoothes his voice and tells Fuhito, "If you kill these Turks, I'll let this reactor thing slide."

Then he sees that Reno and Rude are there, and so is Tseng, and a moment later Veld walks in behind them.

They all look so ... disappointed in him.

But not surprised.

Except Trig ... he looks shocked and betrayed. But Tseng, Rude ... Reno even shakes his head as he taps his mag-rod on his shoulder, like he expected it all along.

Perhaps predictably, Fuhito decides that Rufus has become way more trouble than he's worth and tries to kill him, and Tseng orders the Turks to protect Rufus from AVALANCHE, and ... they do. The Turks protect him ... just as they always have, from outside threats at least. With no hesitation, they stand between him and AVALANCHE, and deal with the terrorists so that Rufus won't have to.

The little skirmish unfolds around him like something unreal. Is this really happening? Is it really over? Has he really been found out?

Are they really going to take him back home?

What is his father going to say?

His own words return over and over to his mind, what he said, out loud, where they could hear him. _If you kill these Turks ..._

In spite of his yawning horror and his terror of what's going to happen when they get him back to the Tower, he is genuinely relieved when it turns out that Turks are more deadly than terrorists.


	4. the Turks

In the end, the Mako reactor is destroyed. Rufus doesn't see how it happens; he only ducks behind one of the Turks' choppers when the explosions begin. So, ultimately, he accomplishes absolutely nothing constructive by having come out to Corel in the first place. He might as well have stayed home and avoided this entire disaster; on top of everything else that went wrong here, the whole thing was _futile._

On the helicopter ride back, Tseng accompanies him.

For the first hour of the flight, Rufus is too wrapped up in his own misery to care. His father is going to be ... furious. Perhaps violently so.

But it's not the (perilously high) risk of being physically punished that Rufus fears the most. Maybe at one time, not so very long ago, that would have been his prime worry, but now ... now it's the knowledge that the fragile peace he has achieved with his father is certainly doomed.

No trip to Wutai now, he imagines with despair.

The phrase keeps coming back to him, though. _If you kill these Turks ..._ Why did he _say_ that? Well, he knows why he said it, it was because that was the only way he could think of, right at that moment, to keep his treachery secret. Kill all the witnesses ... but would he have attempted to go that route if he'd noticed Reno or Tseng first?

Rufus doesn't know.

He did say it, though, and they all heard it, and they still guarded him with their lives just as they are charged to do. And now Tseng sits across from him in the back of the helicopter and says nothing, with no hint of condemnation on his face.

It's the same expression Tseng always has, and gradually Rufus begins to resent it. His anger at Tseng provides a good antidote to his horror at the ruin he's made of his family relationship; he's sure that Tseng expects him to have some kind of guilt or remorse over ordering the Turks killed, but why should he? Why _shouldn't_ he have sided with AVALANCHE? The Turks always talked a good game with him, _you're one of us, we'll look out for you,_ but were never there when he needed them. They never _did_ anything.

Tseng always stood by, doing nothing, wearing that neutral mask, doing _nothing._ Rufus has had to fix his relationship with his father all by himself, and it's been hard, _painful,_ and he only did this thing with AVALANCHE in order to _protect_ himself, and yeah it turned out to be kind of a mistake in the end but it's not like he had any other options and the Turks never helped him, and ... all of these things pass through Rufus's mind and he says none of them. Because he doesn't need to justify himself, and he won't.

The helicopters must stop in Costa del Sol in the dark hours of the morning, to refuel. Rufus gets out to stretch his legs, and nobody stops him. They all know he has nowhere to go.

Finally, he asks Tseng, "Have you told him?"

"I have not," says Tseng, "but I believe the Director has."

_Great Gaia._ It's nothing Rufus didn't expect, but hearing it said aloud sends a dagger through his belly. "Do you ... know what he said?"

"I only know the orders I was given."

Rufus is tempted to ask, but at the same time he is terrified of the answer.

What Tseng reads into his silence, Rufus has no way to know, but whatever it is, it prompts Tseng to say, "Sir, don't worry." His voice is much gentler than Rufus has ever heard it before. "The Director has taken care of it. We're going to look out for you."

_You've_ never _looked out for me._ The words burn the tip of Rufus's tongue, but he withholds them. Saying them will change nothing.

On the second leg of the trip, while the helicopters are over the ocean and the first rays of the sun are beginning to touch the edge of the sky, Rufus's emotions start to clear. He's probably going to die when they reach Midgar. Maybe Veld will do it; he knows Veld is a skilled assassin, and it won't hurt.

But, no matter what happens, the anxiety that has become a recent and unwelcome fixture in Rufus's life is finally over.

He leans back in the seat and kicks out his legs, and folds his arms.

The choppers land on one of the lower helipads of the Shinra Tower, and Rude and Trig clear the area before Tseng lets Rufus get out. The hallway is also clear when Rufus is escorted into the building, and he realizes then that his arrival is being covered up. He's not sure what that means; it could mean anything. No one really saw him leave, and now the Turks ensure that no one sees him return.

They take him to their own floor and into the office that used to be his (it's Veld's again), and lock him in. Reno stays with him, probably to keep him from leaving, although Rufus still has nowhere to go.

He pulls a chair over to the window and sits down where he can look out at the city, wishing Veld would just get it over with.

He and Reno wait in silence (for what, Rufus doesn't know) for a good hour before Reno finally shifts and says something.

"Would it've been too much t'ask, for you t' _come_ t'me before doin' somethin' like this?"

Rufus does not respond. There's nothing to say. Oh, words flit through his mind - accusations, anger, recriminations, _you never did anything_ \- but it's too late now and there never was a point to it.

Reno waits for an answer, and when Rufus does not give him one he eventually huffs, and says nothing more.

Midgar really is a _dirty_ city, Rufus thinks. Even now, halfway to noon, the city is just plain dark, with a lifeless sky and a gray haze obscuring the edges of the plate beyond the reactor ring. Is it the reactors? That's what AVALANCHE thinks. But how could it be? Mako energy is clean, producing almost zero emissions. And yet here he is, looking at a city covered in haze. It makes him wonder.

Forty minutes or so later the door opens, and Reno hops to his feet. Rufus does not look to see who has arrived.

"Mr. Vice President," says Veld.

"Going to shoot me now?" asks Rufus, with a slight thrill of fear. "I've been waiting long enough."

"Nobody is going to kill you."

Does Rufus dare believe that? He isn't sure he wants to. There are worse things, after all. "Am I going to wish you'd killed me?" he asks after a moment.

"I hope not. Please, sir, come with me."

Sometime over the previous evening and this morning, the Turks have remodeled two of the holding cells and one interrogation room, connecting them together and creating a tiny suite of rooms. "I apologize for the mess, sir," says Veld, as he shows Rufus in. There's still dust in the corners, and drying spackle in lines marking where doorways have been cut through the walls. "We'll continue working on it until it's fully habitable."

_You're fucking kidding me._ Rufus doesn't say it. Instead, he says, "So ... what? I just disappear?"

"Your father is going to send you on an extended overseas assignment of the utmost importance," says Veld. "In fact, it came up suddenly and is quite urgent, so you left last night. The details of your assignment must be kept secret for your own safety and for the success of the mission, including where you went and how long you will be gone."

He's going to just disappear. How does he feel about this? Rufus isn't sure. He turns around and looks at Veld, and Reno, who is standing behind his Director. "Whose idea was this?"

"I talked the President into it, sir." He hesitates, weighs his words, and then adds, "This seemed like the best possible outcome for everyone involved. If your father decides to drop by, you will of course have to be ... supervised."

It takes only a moment for Rufus to read the meaning behind that. He turns away, not willing to face Veld any longer. "That will be all," he says.

"Yes, sir. Please think about what kind of furniture and other items you would like and let one of us know."

"Of course."

* * *

It takes the Turks a little over a week to finish renovating the rooms. They do it entirely by themselves; almost no one else in the company knows precisely where the department is located in the building or how to reach it, and the Turks are hardly going to trust anyone in even that tiny circle with their newest and biggest secret. When he isn't consumed with total humiliation at this treatment, Rufus finds it kind of entertaining to watch these professional killers wrestle with electrical wiring and fuss with paint.

He winds up with a sitting room with a desk and two chairs and tables, a bedroom, and a tiny but fully furnished bathroom, connected by open doorways. There are no cameras, at least as far as he can tell, but the door locks when it closes and cannot be released without a keycard. Rufus wonders why they bother; where would he go?

A computer is installed for him, and he quickly discovers that he still has full access to the Shinra mainframe but cannot upload or manipulate any data. No emails, no messages to the company BBS, no sneaking files onto someone's desktop. Information can come in, but none can leave.

It surprises him that his access hasn't been curtailed - he even has a full feed from the security cameras - but he says nothing about it, just in case it's an oversight.

If any of the Turks are angry with him, they keep it to themselves. They continue to call him _sir._ They furnish him with whatever he requests without question. They are reserved with him, but that may perhaps be a reaction to Rufus's own reticence. Once the renovations are finished, Rufus wants very little to do with any of them. His interactions with them are limited to telling them what he wants to eat, one of them later entering to retrieve the dishes afterward, and, once a week, a Turk collecting his laundry and bringing it back once it has been cleaned. Every other week a Turk spends an hour or so in his rooms, making sure the place stays clean. Rufus rarely speaks to them, will barely look at them. There is always a polite tap on the door and the pause of a few seconds before one intrudes on him.

It's all a rather sharp come-down from his accustomed lifestyle, and he resents it. Deeply. Even though he is grateful to be alive, and that he was not beaten into senselessness or worse for what even Rufus can admit was a pretty unforgivable betrayal ... this is _not_ a life that he has _ever_ had to live, or even dreamed he would be required to live. His bedroom alone in Junon would have encompassed this entire suite and had room to spare.

The Turks don't require him to maintain any particular schedule, and there is very little to anchor him to day or night. Rufus soon falls into an eccentric pattern of sleeping for twelve or fourteen hours, spending a period of time awake, and then dropping back to sleep for another half-day. Sometimes he is up for less than two hours before the depressing reality of his situation sends him back to bed; other times he is awake for twenty-six hours straight or more.

Whenever he gets up, he takes a shower and dresses the way he has always dressed, right down to his coat and tie. He is still Rufus Shinra, and will not allow himself to forget that.

At first he spends his waking hours on the computer, obsessively researching AVALANCHE and trying to figure out how his treachery was discovered; later, when he comes up dry and runs out of avenues on that, he just reads the company BBS out of boredom.

_Boredom._ Rufus can't recall ever being bored, truly bored, in the sense of having absolutely nothing to do. Even when he was a child, free time had to be written explicitly into his schedule or else he had none. Now he has literally nothing better to do than to browse the accounting department's cookie-recipe-sharing forum, or read tersely-worded, all-caps messages from Heidegger to his division that if office supplies are needed, they should be ordered properly through requisitions and not (or, NOT NOT NOT!!!!!!!!!) liberated indiscriminately from a co-worker's office.

The space in which he is housed is small enough that he gets essentially zero exercise; it is the matter of only a few steps from one end of the place to the other. There are no windows, nor any within sufficient distance to the door for natural light to enter when someone checks on him. Rufus takes to leaving the overhead lights off, and uses table lamps with dark shades instead; the light bothers him less that way.

His father does not stop by to see him, or send him any messages of any kind. There is no hint given to him as to just how long he is going to be expected to live this way, and Rufus does not inquire; he decides that he just doesn't want to know. The wrong answer might make him want to strangle himself.

Sometimes he watches his father move around the building via the security feed. There are no cameras in the office on the top floor (or at least none that Rufus has ever been able to access) but there is one in the hallway outside the family suite, and the President often takes meetings elsewhere. The man smiles, chats with people, demands and commands respect, and never, ever says even the first word about his son. Inquiries into how Rufus is doing are bluntly ignored.

A few weeks in, it's Tseng who checks on him, and Rufus fights down his resentment enough to ask, "Do you know what's going to happen to Sunny?"

"... yes."

The bottom drops out of Rufus's stomach, and he asks, "He sold her?"

"That's what we did, yes."

Rufus does not miss the way Tseng rephrased that. "He ... wanted you to kill her, didn't he?"

Tseng's gaze drops. "We would never do that to you, sir."

"Did you find her a good home at least?" There's a hard spot in Rufus's throat, but he keeps his voice steady. 

"We had to keep her from competing," says Tseng, "so that your father won't find out what we did. So we took her to Cosmo Canyon and gave her to a farm family with some children. We made sure to ... impress upon them, that she is never to be re-sold."

"Check up on her sometimes, would you?"

"Yes, sir."

When Tseng is gone, Rufus turns out the light and crawls back into bed, and remembers the way the chocobo would happily wark when she saw him, and the affectionate way she would rub her head against his chest. He recalls the smell of her feathers, the way they felt under his hands. When was the last time he was out to the stable to see her? He can't remember. He should have gone out at least once since he moved back to Midgar but he ... just never did.

He hopes she'll be happy in Cosmo Canyon, and he hopes that Tseng did not just tell him a well-meant lie.

* * *

After a while Rufus has only the vaguest idea of how much time is passing. Every now and then he checks the calendar on his computer, but it seems as though many more days are going by than he can recall, and that's disconcerting. So he eventually stops looking.

Sometimes he spends the majority of his time asleep. At other times he can't sit still; he wants to _move,_ to _do things,_ to get out of here and just walk around (or run somewhere). He paces, restless. Rufus had never thought that there would be a time when he missed being able to see random strangers, but that time has come. When these phases grip him he sometimes strikes or kicks the wall, as though something inside him thinks he can knock it down. After a time he takes to breaking things, throwing them against the wall or smashing them to pieces on the floor, just to hear them shatter.

Any mess he makes in this way is always picked up soon afterward; the Turks can hear the racket he makes, and they respond as soon as the noise ceases. If it's Rude or Kat who checks on him after he has broken something, they simply remove the broken pieces in silence, but if it's Cissnei, Reno or Tseng, whoever it is will try to talk to him while cleaning it up. They know, he realizes, that he is becoming desperate for company. He is not yet willing to accept it from them, and ignores their overtures.

As time passes (unmarked, unremarked) it begins to slowly creep into Rufus's mind that he is literally a caged animal right now. He is entirely at the mercy of the Turks. His father has obviously disowned him, or forgotten about him, or both, and no one else knows where he is.

The Turks could do anything to him. He is trapped, can go nowhere, and can complain to no one. There is no one to whom he can appeal, no check on their power over him. It is only their professionalism, and whatever loyalty they might still feel toward him, that keep them from misusing him terribly.

The realization should probably be frightening, but Rufus has never in his life been truly afraid of a Turk and he isn't now; he instead finds the thought arousing. His sex drive, dealt with to this point in perfunctory manner during lengthy showers, begins to intrude into his mind more and more often. He thinks about just how _helpless_ he is, just how _held in place._ It's ... interesting, and leads his mind to interesting places.

One day he purposefully smashes a lamp and waits for the inevitable response. Cissnei comes to remove the shards, and as she often does she starts to chatter to him quietly about a television show she is following these days while picking up the mess.

He interrupts her monologue as she is about to leave. "I want to see Reno," he tells her.

It's interesting to Rufus, how her face lights up when he speaks to her. "I'll call him, sir," she says. "Right now."

A bit later (minutes? hours?) there is another tap at the door and then Reno walks in. He, too, looks strangely happy at this development. "You wanted t'see me, Boss?"

"Close the door," Rufus tells him, and he does. Then, "Come over here and kiss me."

Reno's expression drops from that hopeful half-smile into a more troubled look. "I dunno if that's ..."

The feel of Rufus's clothing against his skin is suddenly unbearable. He stands up and starts to take off his coat. "Do it, Reno," he says.

There is a long hesitation, and Rufus can't even begin to guess what Reno is thinking. Then the Turk says, "I can't ... just ..."

The refusal is almost too much for Rufus to take. He heats up from the humiliation of it, and if he hadn't already broken his chair-side lamp he would grab it right now and throw it at Reno's head. He has his coat off now, and he pitches that instead. "You have to do it!" he says, and he hears his own voice rise in pitch, take on equal parts rage and despair. "I am ordering you to do it!"

Reno catches Rufus's thrown coat, shakes it out and neatly folds it up to lay it across the back of Rufus's computer desk chair. Rufus strips off his under-coat, and then takes off his tie as Reno averts his eyes. "Sir," says Reno, and Rufus interrupts him.

"Stop. Just shut up." Rufus unfastens his vest, starts to unbutton his shirt; he takes a breath as he does it, calms himself. "I need this, Reno. Come here and kiss me, then hold me against the wall and ... and have your way with me." He swallows. "Come on. I can't stop you. Don't you know that? I can't stop you."

There is a battle going on inside Reno; Rufus can see it happening now. He won't look at Rufus, and his hand twitches as though he _wants_ to touch and has to keep stopping himself. "Reno ..." says Rufus.

"I can't, sir. I'm sorry." Reno wins and Rufus loses; the red-haired Turk swipes open the door and escapes before Rufus can say anything more. The door locks behind him.

An instant later Rufus is blinded by fury; in an unthinking rage he grabs his under-coat off the floor and smashes everything in his reach, using the heavy fabric like a blunt-force whip to knock over and destroy every object in the room except the furniture.

The destruction, and the sheer physicality of the effort required to wreak it, leave him wrung out. He goes into his tiny closet of a bedroom, strips down, and huddles under his blanket. After a few minutes he hears the door open again, and some Turk or other - maybe Reno, maybe not - comes in and tidies up the chaos he just created. Rufus hides and does not look.

When he is finally alone again, some time later, Rufus desperately masturbates himself to orgasm, and then drifts to sleep sticky and wet.

* * *

They replace the items he broke. They always do.

Tseng comes to see him (the next day? two days later? three?) and he sits down in the desk chair, in front of Rufus's new computer, without being invited. "Sir," he says. "Please. What can we do for you?"

It's impossible to tell if Tseng knows about what Rufus asked of Reno, or if he is simply responding to Rufus's brief burst of insanity. Rufus considers giving the man only silence, the way he almost always has before, but Tseng is patient and waits. "Unless you've suddenly become empowered to let me out of here," he tells Tseng at last, "I would say there is nothing you can do for me."

It takes a while for Tseng to formulate the answer he wants to give. "As far as your father is concerned, this is a punishment," he says. "But that's not how we see it, and it doesn't have to be that way."

Again, Rufus contemplates retreating back into silence, and again Tseng patiently waits until he changes his mind. "And how is it that you see it, then?"

"Veld wanted to protect you, and so did I, and so did everyone else. Your father ... was ..."

Rufus interrupts. "Incandescent."

Tseng nods. "The only thing we could do was to separate you. Veld told your father that you would be kept in isolation, like a prisoner. It was never our intention to make that actually happen."

Rufus takes a few moments to think that over; the punishment his father wanted to inflict on him is the one that Rufus has been inflicting intentionally on himself. The irony of it irritates him, but he's not yet ready to relinquish his anger at the Turks.

Then he looks over at Tseng, who is once more patiently waiting him out; Tseng, who once more has impassive neutrality written across his features.

Tseng, who has always been there.

"You want to do something for me?" says Rufus, and Tseng gives a small nod. Rufus sits back in his chair. "You can kiss me."

It's then that he knows that Reno told no one, and Tseng came in here completely ignorant of the request that Rufus made to the other Turk. The man hides his surprise quite well, but Rufus has known him for most of his life, and knows that he's taken Tseng completely off-guard.

Tseng starts to say something, and to forestall another rejection Rufus starts to speak instead. "You asked me what you can do for me. I'm telling you. Were those just pretty words, lies, just like all the lies you and the other Turks have always told me, about how I'm _one of you,_ and you'll _look out for me?_ Is that it?"

That isn't quite what he'd intended to say, and he certainly didn't expect his voice to rise in tone there at the end. It just kind of comes out in a rush, and then it's too late to take it back. "Kiss me," says Rufus. "Or are you just not into that?" He realizes that he actually has no idea if Tseng is into men or women or, like Reno, both.

After a moment Tseng stands up, and Rufus knows he is being refused again. Fury begins to rise within him. "I don't know if you mean that," says Tseng, "or if you're just saying it because you're lonely."

"What fucking difference does it make? For fuck's sake, what do I have to do? Slit my throat with a fucking dinner knife?"

"It matters," says Tseng. And then, like Reno, he says, "I'm sorry."

As the door closes behind him, Rufus throws his new lamp, and it shatters against the wall next to the door.

After that, all the knives he is given are dull.

* * *

Tseng and Reno do not speak to anyone about Rufus propositioning them, let alone to one another, and so neither one learns about the other's experience. They both think about it, however, in the context of how Rufus seems to be deteriorating, how this idea of Veld's, intended to save the treacherous young heir and protect him from his father's wrath, is looking worse and worse.

Not long after, Tseng brings up the possibility of letting Rufus out for a while to Veld. "Just around the office, maybe," he says. "Let him look out the window at least." He doesn't mention the sexual proposal; it isn't relevant.

Veld shakes his head. "The President would find out." He does not say how, but Tseng guesses that President Shinra must be checking the security feeds from the department's offices from time to time, making sure his orders are being followed. "You're right, though. This situation is becoming untenable. Let me think about it."

Reno does not bring anything up with Veld, or with anyone. His morals are more flexible than Tseng's; it wasn't the possibility that Rufus might be asking for sex out of a warped need for normal human contact that stopped him, but instead the suddenness and weird inappropriateness of it. It has not escaped him that he could, in fact, do whatever he liked to Rufus, but he never _would_ and he does not really like the implications of what Rufus said along those lines.

Still, he remembers how Rufus always seemed to like it a little rough, and wonders if that's enough of an excuse for him. They do have a history, after all.

In the end, it's enough. The next time Reno is staying late in order to be there when Rufus comes unglued and destroys all his possessions, and most everyone else has left for the night and there are only two other Turks in the office working late, Reno wanders over to the hidden little room where their terrible secret is kept. It's a bit after midnight.

Rufus is surprised when the door opens; he hasn't thrown anything and he's already eaten, so there's really no reason for anyone to visit. When he sees that it's Reno, he frowns and turns back to the computer screen.

"Unless you're here to fuck me," he says coldly, "I want you to leave."

Reno slides the rest of the way in and shuts the door. "What if I _am_ here t'fuck you, then?" he asks.

The answer makes the muscles of Rufus's lower abdomen tighten. He thinks about rebuffing Reno, just as Reno rebuffed him, but after a few moments of thought he finds that he wants this more than he wants petty revenge. He pushes his chair back and regards the Turk. "Then I guess there's nothing I can do. Is there?"

Reno isn't sure what Rufus would rather hear more - _no, there isn't,_ or _of course there is, just tell me and I'll stop_ \- so he says nothing. Instead he pulls Rufus out of the chair and pushes him back into the small bedroom, and tears off Rufus's coat and his tie and then his shirt and his pants. He's rough, biting Rufus and pinning him down, and Rufus responds wildly; Reno has to quickly shuck his own jacket and shirt to keep Rufus from ripping them.

Enforced confinement has made Rufus softer than he used to be, and Reno is able to easily catch his wrists and trap him. This stops Rufus from scratching him and elicits gasping moans, and Reno growls as he mouths Rufus's collarbone. He grinds his erection into the hollow of Rufus's hip, inhaling the scent of the young man's skin; Reno hadn't remembered until this moment how _good_ Rufus smells, how good he tastes and feels. How incredible it always was to screw the boss. He forces Rufus to lower his arms so that Reno can slide down his body; the dark gold hair between Rufus's legs smells of warm, heady sexual spice.

He holds Rufus's hands down at his sides, teases him with his tongue and lips, and Rufus - sensitive as ever - comes when Reno's mouth slides down over his erection. Then, just as he sometimes did in the past, Reno brings Rufus's hands together and thrusts into them until he comes himself; his grip is tight, and he gives Rufus no opportunity to pull his hands away.

Rufus is relaxed afterward, tired. He whispers, "I thought you were going to fuck me."

Reno is still holding him by the wrists, and kisses the side of his throat. "Maybe next time, yeah?" Then he pauses a moment, and says, "You never wanted it before."

The response this gets is disturbing. "What I want doesn't matter anymore," says Rufus. "Do whatever you like. I can't stop you."

_Yes, you can._ "You're still the boss," says Reno.

"I'm a prisoner."

Again, Reno kisses him, this time on the lips. "You're still the boss, yo. You ever tell me t'stop, I'll stop."

It's now that he releases Rufus's wrists, and Rufus rubs his left one. He sits up, and Reno moves to allow it. "Don't you ever hate me?" he asks.

"Pffth. Why would I hate you?"

"For what I said, back at the reactor." Rufus regards the Turk; the light is dim, and Reno's hair smolders. "Does anyone hate me for it?"

"Mmmm." Reno reaches for his pants on the floor, pulls them into his lap, does not try to put them on. "Not me. A coupla the others did for a while. I think it really hurt Tseng. Rude was ready t'punch your lights out." He shrugs. "They're over it."

The news doesn't surprise Rufus. "Why weren't you?"

Reno shakes his head. "I knew why you did it, yeah?"

After that, Reno comes to _have his way_ with Rufus with fair regularity. He isn't always in the office, and even when he is, he's not always the one to stay late to tend to Rufus's destructive episodes. There's not always an opportune moment when he can visit without waking suspicion. Rufus finds that he really has no way to predict when Reno will slip into his rooms, and the uncertainty of it is exciting.

Some of his instability calms. It's not the sex, exactly, more the way Reno draws him into conversation, during and after. He tells Rufus what the Turks have been up to lately, what Reno himself has been up to lately, and he shares some of the gossip that was once the mainstay of their professional relationship. He touches Rufus - his body, his hands, his face - which is pleasant and grounding, in a way Rufus hadn't realized he needed.

One night Reno brings along a couple of condoms and a little tube of lubricant. He doesn't ask if Rufus wants it; they both know that Reno will go along with anything Rufus says, but they keep it unspoken, to keep the veil over the fiction that Rufus has no choice but to comply with Reno's sexual demands. It feels strange to Rufus, powerfully intimate, more so than even the most ardent blow job. Reno puts him on his hands and knees, rests across his back, pinches his nipples and grips his cock while thrusting slowly into him, and Rufus isn't sure he likes it at first. Then he comes with Reno inside him, and his body clenches on the intrusion, and it turns Rufus's orgasm into something he could have never predicted, something that goes on and on, rocks his hips, and drags harsh sounds out of his throat.

* * *

One day when Rude comes to collect his breakfast dishes (breakfast, although it is close to sundown), Rufus shocks the hell out of him by addressing him. "I want some books."

Rude immediately pulls his notebook out of his inside jacket pocket and clicks his pen. "Any preferences?"

For a moment Rufus considers saying, _Surprise me,_ just to see what Rude would, indeed, surprise him with. What would a person like Rude consider to be a good book? Maybe later.

The Turks give him anything he wishes, and so they now give him books. Rufus starts with the classics of literature, branches out into popular modern fiction, and then drifts back into the classics, this time of philosophy and political thought. He reads stories of lambs and birds of prey, and madmen with lanterns; accounts of great monsters from the sea; and the ownership of acorns that fall from a tree to the ground.

The last vestige of Rufus's deep resentment of this thing that has been done to him fades. His father wants this to be punishment, but as Tseng explained, it is only punishment if Rufus lets it be. He has nothing to do, and that means he has time to do anything he wants. All of the things he never had time to do in the past - because he always had schoolwork or, later, company business to attend - he has time for them now. This place is quiet, peaceful, and he is completely safe here. This is an opportunity, if he wants it to be.

He asks for a journal, and receives it, and begins to collect in it bits of lore from his readings. He remembers the connections between mathematics and logic, and creates new ones between logic and history and the structure of human society. The symbolic language of lines and icons that he once used to describe the social relationships in the company is adapted to describe the relationships he discovers (or imagines) between these different fields.

Sometimes Rufus thinks about the nature of reality, and the reality of nature. Actor and act ... thinker and thought ... is there a difference, or is the apparent difference illusory? Is the thinker merely the self-propagation of thought, the appearance of separation just a deception of language? Is the actor merely the process of acting, to cease to be when the action ceases?

Can power exist when it is not being exercised?

As Rufus works through these things, he begins to talk to the other Turks. Reno knows nothing about literature and philosophy, and cares even less. Cissnei loves literature, and knows more about it than Rufus would have expected a Turk to know; none of her favorite authors has been alive in two hundred years. Rude is an unexpectedly insightful conversationalist. Rufus has never spoken much with Rude, and although he has good feelings toward the man he's never given him much thought in the past; Rude is quiet, calm, efficient, doesn't stand out much, and tends to fade into the background behind the firecracker that is Reno.

He also turns out to be intelligent, well-read, and extremely thoughtful. If he still wants to punch Rufus's lights out, as Reno said before, there is no sign of it. Rufus has an extra chair moved in so that Rude can sit down comfortably without having to take a seat at the computer desk. The Turk reads whatever Rufus gives him and comes back with thoughts that are always interesting even when Rufus does not agree with them.

Rufus takes to leaving his computer on one of cameras on the outside of the building when he isn't otherwise using it, so that there is almost always a real-time feed of a genuine day/night cycle. It's not a window, but it's reality.

He breaks things far less often. Spells of instability come upon him infrequently now, and when they do he simply knocks on the door to summon some company.

He checks the date one day, and realizes that he's been a captive for more than two years.

* * *

"How much longer am I going to be in here?" he asks Tseng. His twenty-third birthday is coming up. The Turks have promised him a cake. It would be nice if he could spend the day somewhere else, but Rufus realizes that he won't be terribly sad if he's told that isn't going to happen.

"Do you want to leave?" It's neither a serious question nor an idle one; Tseng has no power to release Rufus, but he nevertheless wants to know the current layout of Rufus's emotional state.

Rufus understands, and thinks about it. "I don't know," he says. The life he used to have - full of things, events, people, _business_ \- seems like a far-away thing now, or like the memory of a dream. The life he has now - three small rooms and a handful of faithful Turks - is so constrained, and yet there is no pressure on him here, no bad consequences for mistakes, essentially no opportunity to _make_ mistakes.

It's a relaxing life, really, but Rufus is starting to feel restless again. There are only so many books he can read, so much theory he can absorb and process, before he wants to try some of it out. From here, he can't. Someday he will be out of here, and he will need to remember what it was like to help run a world-spanning mega-corporation.

Yes, his earlier thought was right: it would be nice to leave.

"I want to start receiving regular updates again," he says.

"Yes, sir." The agreement is instantaneous. "On what, exactly?"

"Everything. Everything I used to be given. Pretend ..." He chooses his words. "Pretend ... I'm still Vice President."

Tseng hesitates, and then says, "Sir, you _are_ still Vice President."

Rufus had not known that; he'd assumed that he'd been stripped of his position the moment his treachery was revealed. The revelation gives him an interesting feeling. Despite his circumstances, then, he is still a latent power in the company.

He remembers the disjointed musing written into his journal. Is it power if it is not exercised?

Rufus decides to exercise it, to make it real. "Send in Veld. I want to speak to him."

Tseng stands and says, "Of course, sir." He leaves, and Rufus waits.

Less than five minutes later there is a tap at his door, and then the door opens, and there's Veld standing right there, expectant and respectful. "You wanted to see me, sir?"

"Yes." Rufus gestures at the other proper chair in the room, the one Rude takes when they discuss the words of dead authors. "Sit down, please."

Veld does. He clearly has no clue what Rufus wants, but he's compliant, the same way he used to be when Rufus had an office and Veld answered to him. In fact, at the moment, it is almost as though _this_ is Rufus's office.

Veld is Rufus's jailor, but maybe reluctantly so, and he would know things that no one else would. Things that Rufus never much cared to know before, but now does. "I'd like for you to tell me everything about the conversation you had with my father, when you came up with this plan to cage me in your back offices."

"Where should I start?"

Rufus waves his hand around, at the small room around them. "Start with whose idea it was to lock me up."

"It was mine, sir." With that beginning point, Veld unfolds it for him, step by step: breaking the news to President Shinra that his son was positively identified as a traitor; the President going absolutely ballistic; Veld's immediate understanding that he was going to take Rufus literally apart, with his bare hands if necessary, as soon as the Turks brought him back. He'd seen the President strike out before, occasionally, but never like that. A backhand across the face of an unruly subordinate, or a forceful push or pull. He'd known that the President was physical with Rufus from time to time, but until President Shinra started to rave about all the things he was going to do to Rufus when he got his hands on him, Veld had not really comprehended the danger the father posed to his son.

He'd thought that the violence in Rufus's home was something along the same lines as what he had himself seen. Slaps, pushing. He knew about the harsh discipline that had been administered to Rufus when he was a small child, but children sometimes have to be punished.

What Veld saw and heard in the President's office that night was something different. It was a murder in the making.

"Your safety is our highest priority behind the President's," says Veld. "So I separated you."

Rufus makes a disgusted sound. He's more than a little humiliated to know that Veld knows so much about the ill-treatment he always got from his father; the old habits of denial, concealment, spring up inside him. Those things are personal family things, not to be known by others. Not even Turks. "If he told you to kill me," says Rufus, "you'd do it."

"Sir, he did. He told me to bring you straight back and deliver you to him. It's the same thing. I talked him out of it."

Interesting. "What if there comes a time when you can't talk him out of it?"

"I believe I will always be able to talk him out of it. You're still his son. He just ... lost control for a little while, I think. You'll always be his son."

"... thank you for the information," says Rufus. "That's all I needed."

When Veld is gone, Rufus thinks about what he has been told. If he believes it - and, in his heart, Rufus knows it to be true - then by locking him in here Veld probably saved his life. Out of duty? Or some other reason?

It's strange, though ... he's resented the Turks for so long, for standing by, for _doing nothing._ But now they've done something, it seems. When he needed it most, the Turks did something.

What would have happened, in another world, where he went to them and told them that he was afraid for his life, instead of contacting AVALANCHE? It could have never happened - things unfolded the way they did for good reason, and that conversation is not one that could have ever occurred - but Rufus still finds it a tempting exercise to imagine how that might have fallen out.

Reno comes by in the early morning hours, and when he attempts to hold Rufus down, Rufus resists and says, "No." He is immediately released, and so he then says, "Show me how to touch you."

It turns out that Reno knows exactly what he likes and is an enthusiastic instructor. He teaches Rufus to bite his wrists and up his inner arms, how to use his tongue along lines of bone and sinew across his chest, how _not_ to tickle. Rufus is reluctant to use his mouth on Reno's cock, so he doesn't, but that turns out not to really matter; his hands work well enough. He learns how much is too little and how much is too much, and he learns how to bring Reno to the edge of orgasm and then stop, because Reno turns out to really like that. Rufus has never known Reno to make such sounds, or to move quite that way. When he eventually lets Reno fuck him, there's a strength to Reno's ardor that has never been there before.

Rufus discovers that give-and-take is much more productive than just taking.

This, too, he realizes, is an exercise of power.


	5. President Shinra

Veld leaves. It's unexpected, and accompanied by some drama that probably nobody could have predicted: one of the AVALANCHE leaders that Rufus heard about but never met turns out to be Veld's daughter. She's ill in some way - Reno is unclear on the details - and had somehow lost her memory, and Fuhito carried her away just as Veld and the daughter realized they were related.

So Veld has dropped everything and run off to try to get his daughter back. Rufus isn't sure what to make it of all when he's informed, the day after it all occurs. He would normally trust Veld to put the company first in whichever way he chooses to deal with this unhappy situation, but it almost sounds like Veld has _resigned,_ which of course is impossible for a Turk.

"What are you going to do?" Rufus asks Reno.

Reno shrugs. "Dunno yet. Tseng'll let us know." He pauses. "I know orders've come down already t'hunt him down an' kill him."

When Reno is gone Rufus tries to go back to his reading, but the news rattles around his mind. Veld. Left Shinra. It's like he's just been told that the sun has begun to rise in the west. If it had come from a different source, he just wouldn't believe it.

Veld's daughter. In some kind of trouble. And Veld has forfeited his position in the Turks and very probably his own life in order to look out for her.

Not that Rufus really believes that the Turks will obey the order to find Veld and kill him; probably they will half-ass any effort to locate him, and pretend to have not seen him if they do run across him by accident. But there is more to Shinra than the Department of Administrative Research, much more, and there are other organizations within the company that can be turned out to kill a wayward defector.

Veld is risking everything to aid his daughter.

Over the course of a couple of hours, Rufus begins to find this frustrating, and then absolutely enraging. The thought will not leave him alone, and the more he thinks about it, the more terrible it becomes. Veld has given up his position - which meant everything to him, as far as Rufus has ever been able to tell - and put his very life on the line, in the name of tending to his offspring. Something _no one_ has ever done for Rufus.

The idea will not allow Rufus to concentrate, and every time it intrudes into his thoughts it frays a little more of his control. Finally something snaps, and it's not until the door flies open to reveal a stunned-looking Reno that Rufus realizes that he has, once again, for the first time in a year or more, reduced everything around him to pieces in an episode of blind, mad rage.

"... you okay, Boss?" says Reno after a moment.

Rufus turns his back on the Turk, and will not speak to him at first; he's breathing hard from the effort of smashing his computer monitor repeatedly into the wall, and so furious he does not trust himself to open his mouth. Then Reno says, "Hey, hey, talk t'me. What's the matter?" and touches him on the shoulder, and Rufus thinks that maybe Reno, of all of them ... Reno knows him the best. Reno will understand.

"No one cares about me," he tells Reno, pulling away from the Turk's hand. "Not like that."

"... like what? Sir, y'know we ..."

"Not like that," says Rufus again. "Not enough to give up everything for me."

There's a long silence, and then Reno figures it out. "You think that, yeah?" His voice is low. Disappointed, maybe.

Obviously Rufus was wrong and Reno does not actually understand. "Never mind," he says.

"No." Again, Reno touches his shoulder, and this time when Rufus tries to pull away the Turk just steps over the wreckage of the desk lamp and won't let him. "No, you listen t'me. Whaddya think it means that the Director lit out after Felicia like that?"

That's not obvious? Rufus almost refuses to answer, but then says, "It means he loves her, more than anything else. He'll do anything for her."

"Nah." There's a hard note in Reno's voice. "It means he _fucked up."_

"What are you talking about?" Rufus turns around, irritated because Reno is not making sense.

"C'mon," says Reno. "You _know_ what I'm talkin' about. Turks don't help people by walkin' out on Shinra for 'em and turnin' int'big conspicuous targets. We do it quiet-like, behind the scenes, yeah?" His mouth turns down, into an annoyed twist. "The Director took off 'cause he wasn't thinkin' straight. He coulda done a lot more for her if he'd stuck around here an' kept his head. Shinra's a big company, we get a lot done that nobody knows about." Reno clicks his teeth, and says, "Like you."

"Is this going somewhere?" asks Rufus angrily.

"Yeah. Takin' off like he did ain't a sign of love. I mean, he does love her I think, but if he _hadn't_ took off like that, it wouldn't mean he didn't love her, yeah? It woulda just meant he found a better way t'do somethin' for her. It ain't a sign of devotion or nothin'. Just a sign he couldn't come up with a less stupid way t'save her."

Rufus thinks about that. "A sign of failure," he muses.

"No one ever ran out on Shinra for you," says Reno, "an' no one ever will. 'Cause that'd be _fuckin' up,_ an' we ain't gonna fuck up when it comes t'you. Ever." He snorts, and adds, a little under his breath, "Even though you're prob'ly the most self-absorbed person I know, yo."

"Hmmmph." Rufus thinks about feeling insulted, but his rage has been calmed and it's a choice.

Reno is not apologetic; he has never censored his words for Rufus, and he doesn't now. "Only _you_ could take everythin' that's happenin' an' make it somehow about _you,"_ and then, "Everyone in this office cares about you."

After that Reno cleans up the wreckage Rufus created and leaves, promising to come back with a new computer before the end of the day. Rufus sits in his chair, with a book in his lap but he's not reading it, just staring moodily at the wall, and thinking.

* * *

After that, the Turks are always busy with this thing with Veld. Rufus insists on receiving regular reports, and he starts to find the entire thing highly entertaining. It's almost like one of those television shows Cissnei talks about sometimes: there's materia involved, and AVALANCHE is back in full swing after being quiet for more than a year, and there's long-lost family, and Fuhito is revealed to be far more crazy than Rufus ever would have guessed from the man's demeanor, and yep it looks like the Turks aren't really looking very hard for Veld but they have to pretend otherwise and the shell game they put on for the President and the rest of the executives is extremely educational.

Rufus takes to watching his father again, partially because the man is a part of this ongoing high drama, and partially because he takes a vicious kind of satisfaction in how pissed his father always looks these days. The President constantly wears the kind of expression that always presages an explosion, but for the first time in his life Rufus need not fear it. He is completely safe, hidden away, and his father has probably utterly forgotten that he even exists anyway. When the President lashes out - verbally, usually, although Rufus once catches him raising a hand to Palmer - everyone has to worry about it _except_ Rufus.

For a while, that's all he does - he just observes. He reads the reports, and listens in on meetings and on whispered consultations in the hallways. It's entertaining, nothing more. Then things change. The shell game collapses; the Turks run into Veld and give him active assistance, and aren't careful enough to cover their tracks.

Rufus is one of the first to find out. He's watching a meeting in the conference room on Sixty-Six, a meeting on the topic of Mako engine development projects that _should_ be completely routine and ordinary, but it's rendered tense and strained by the President's simmering fury. When the meeting breaks up and everyone is leaving, a messenger runs in with a note for Rufus's father.

He takes it, dismisses the messenger, reads the note, and had Rufus been present in the same room he would have tried to shrink into the corner and disappear. Then the President walks over to the conference room phone, furiously punches in a number, and holds a conversation in low tones with someone that Rufus soon realizes must be Scarlet. The President's words are full of barely-leashed rage when he tells Scarlet that it is now her job to find Veld.

It's supposed to be the _Turks'_ job to find Veld. They've fucked something up. Rufus doesn't know what, but they've fucked something up.

When his father is finished issuing orders to Scarlet, Rufus walks over to the door and raps his knuckles on it until Kat comes and opens it. "Is Tseng in?" he asks.

"Not at the moment, sir," says Kat. "Do you want me to call him?"

"Yes," says Rufus. This little television show drama has just turned into a game. One he can play, and which he perhaps needs to play to keep his Turks from getting killed. "Tell him that I think prices are being calculated for all your heads as we speak."

* * *

When Tseng returns, every Turk who wasn't already in the office returns with him, and they hold a consultation. Rufus watches it over the cameras, interested in what they're going to do; he knows, as they together come to the understanding that they are basically fucked, that Reno was completely correct before. This represents serious error. They are going to have to undertake a split with the company, but only because they have screwed up.

Tseng already knew that something had gone horribly wrong before he got Rufus's message, but appreciated the verification; he says, without referring to Rufus by name, that he received "confirmation" that a cooperative interaction between Veld and another Turk was observed and reported back to President Shinra. They can assume that they are being blacklisted within the company. All their lives are in danger now, not just Veld's.

"But we still hold an important card," says Tseng. "We have the Vice President as a hostage. The President will hesitate to act against us directly as long as he's in our custody."

A _hostage!?_ Rufus stares at the video feed in disbelief. What the _fuck_ makes Tseng think that Rufus is remotely useful as a _hostage?_

He asks Tseng fifteen minutes later, when the conference has broken up and the dark-haired Turk drops in on him. "What the hell was that?" Rufus says.

Tseng glances over at Rufus's computer monitor, which still shows the video feed from the department's security camera. "I hope you know you weren't the only one watching that," he says as he takes a seat. "I'm sure your father saw it, too, or he will soon."

"A hostage? Seriously?"

Tseng is impassive. "Sir, I apologize for having offended you, but it was necessary to say it so that the President will be aware of our position."

Rufus can't believe he has to spell this out. "I'm not _offended,"_ he says. "But my father wouldn't care if you skinned me alive and hung me from the top of the building. I'm the worst possible hostage!"

"Ahhh," says Tseng. "You're wrong about that. He cares about you."

"He doesn't even remember me. If he needs an heir he can always go find Lazard."

"Lazard is dead, sir," says Tseng. "But even if he weren't, your father would not want to see you harmed."

That's news to Rufus, about Lazard, and he's not sure how he feels about it; he sets it aside for now. He thinks about this a little more, and then says, "Let's say you're right. Hostages are no good if you're not willing to hurt them. Are you willing to hurt me, Tseng?"

Tseng measures his words. "It ... may become necessary to convince the President that we seriously intend to use you as a hostage. But ... no, sir. I'm not."

There's something inside Rufus that eases at those words.

"I hope I can count on your cooperation in this, sir," Tseng continues. "Our loyalty is to Shinra. Your father doesn't believe it right now, but I know you do."

"From an outside perspective it looks like you're mainly loyal to Veld," says Rufus. "What would you say to that?"

Tseng has the grace to look a little chagrined. "We owe Veld, a great deal. However, our ultimate responsibility and loyalty is always to Shinra. If we ever thought Veld was a danger to the company, we would take the appropriate action."

Rufus knows how the department works, better than his father ever did, and this answer is satisfactory. He also knows that there's really nothing he can do about this hostage development anyway. He decides it doesn't matter; he can still play this game, even from a position on the board.

Then he looks at Tseng, who seems a bit uncomfortable although he is hiding it well. Did that question about the Turks' loyalty to Veld bother him? Or is it having use Rufus this way? Rufus gets up, and because the room is so small and the chairs so close together he is able to drop into Tseng's lap, straddling his legs, in almost the same motion.

"Sir," says Tseng, immediately cautious.

"Just so we're clear, how exactly might you convince my father that I am really a hostage?" Rufus leans forward, trapping Tseng in the chair. "Tell me how this might go."

"Sir ..."

"Are you going to drag me out in front of one of the cameras?" asks Rufus. "Put a gun to my head? Force me down to my knees?"

Tseng lays a hand on Rufus's chest, and it's a barrier, resisting Rufus getting any closer. "Please, sir," says Tseng.

Rufus doesn't retreat. The idea of being used as a hostage seems kind of hot, for the same reason being trapped here with no defense can be hot. "You're going to kiss me," says Rufus, "or else you're going to tell me, definitively, that you have no interest at all in kissing me."

"This is not a good idea." Tseng's voice is firm, but it's not the answer Rufus wants.

"Tell me you have no interest in kissing me, at all," he says.

"Sir, I have ..."

Rufus interrupts to clarify, "Without lying."

That stops Tseng again. He isn't looking at Rufus now, but off to the side somewhere, at something behind Rufus's shoulder. He could still lie, and there is even a good possibility that Rufus wouldn't be able to tell, but Rufus is counting on Tseng being too honorable for that. He leans forward a bit more, and is stopped by the pressure of Tseng's hand. "You'll have to make it look good for my father," he says. "Like you really intend to kill me. Maybe you should grab me by the hair and force my head back, and shove the barrel of your gun in my mouth."

Tseng looks shocked at the suggestion, so Rufus does something that Reno sometimes does to him, and he takes Tseng's free hand and pulls it between his own legs. "I would never," Tseng begins, and then Rufus presses the man's fingers against his clothed erection and the words stop.

"Not even if I liked it?" asks Rufus.

There's a long hesitation, and Rufus feels Tseng's fingers twitch, and curve a bit, to make better contact. "Why are you doing this?" asks Tseng at last.

"You have to say it." Rufus pushes Tseng's hand more firmly against himself, uses it to rub. "Or else you have to kiss me."

"Why are you doing this?" asks Tseng again, and Rufus feels the hand on his groin twitch, but at the same time the hand on his chest attempts to nudge him farther back.

Rufus honestly isn't sure. Maybe because he used to jack off, when he was younger, to furtive thoughts of Tseng. Maybe because there's a disaster in progress, and he doesn't know when he'll again have an opportunity.

Maybe because he heard Tseng mentioned by name when his father was ranting to Scarlet.

Maybe because Tseng might be dead in a week.

Rufus has never felt a need to explain himself, and he doesn't now.

"It doesn't matter," he tells Tseng.

"It does matter." Another nudge back, and Tseng attempts to remove his hand from Rufus's erection; Rufus grips tighter.

Rufus says, "No, it doesn't. Not this time."

Tseng's expression shifts, somehow softens. "I can't. You're very attractive. You're also my employer."

That's never stopped Reno; Rufus almost says it, out of irritation, but catches himself. He releases Tseng's hand. "Kiss me," says Rufus. "Just once. Then I won't ask again."

He's almost sure that Tseng will refuse, but in the end the Turk gives in. The pressure on Rufus's chest slackens, Rufus leans forward, and he rests his lips gently against Tseng's.

It's soft at first, and slow, but when Rufus parts his lips the Turk makes a low sound and does likewise, and Rufus falls forward as Tseng's arms go around him and it's heated and hungry and Rufus closes his eyes and there is nothing to his world except Tseng's mouth and tongue. He feels Tseng's hands go up his back under his coat, and one slides under his vest as well, mapping out his body; Rufus responds and presses more closely, and his fingers rumple Tseng's pressed white shirt. He's so _hard_ now, and Tseng is making little noises into his mouth, and there's a warm masculine scent and Rufus can think of nothing except how much he wants to feel the man's skin and taste his sweat.

Then Tseng moves a hand between them again, and he gives a small push, and Rufus, remembering what he said, eases back. It's not easy; he leans his head forward as his body retreats, to keep their mouths together as long as possible. Then he must sit back, lick the moisture off his lips, and watch Tseng do the same.

That was more than Rufus had expected.

But Tseng says, "This can't happen again." His voice is a little rough.

Rufus is realistic. "You know it will."

"No." Tseng tries to stand up, and Rufus stands first so that he can. "It won't. It can't."

He moves to leave, but before he can swipe open the door Rufus says, "If you have to put on a hostage show for my father, I want you to make sure you put your gun in my mouth."

Tseng walks out the door without another word.

* * *

Things become very hectic after that. There are almost never more than one or two Turks in the office at any time; the rest are always out in the field. Veld is looking for a few particular pieces of materia, thinking that they can help his daughter; Fuhito wants the same materia, and nobody thinks that his intentions for it are altruistic. The Turks assist Veld, and Rufus assists the Turks, although in his case it's not for Veld's sake so much as it's because he dislikes and distrusts Fuhito and helping Veld is the most efficient way to oppose Fuhito.

And it's not like he wants Veld dead or anything. Veld's devotion to his daughter still rankles, but the man is a Turk (nobody just _quits_ the Turks) and the Turks belong to Rufus.

Nobody ever drags him out to threaten him for the security cameras, not that Rufus ever thought it would happen; his estimation of his own value as a hostage remains near zero. It's also true that nobody breaks into the Turks' offices to attack them, although Rufus thinks this is just a matter of time really. His father wouldn't just send in a bunch of grunts - the Turk offices are too full of company secrets - but would have to assemble an assault group made up of people who are at least as trusted as the Turks used to be. That might take a little while, but it's pretty much inevitable.

Rufus wonders what he will do when the offices are invaded. The entrance to the room he's in is hidden and could be overlooked, but he can always knock on the door to draw attention to himself. He'd probably have to, actually, and what an interesting conversation _that_ will be.

Most of Rufus's hours are spent scouring the Shinra mainframe in search of clues for this materia that he doesn't really care about; he reads status reports and reviews security footage from around the building and around assorted outside Shinra outposts, eavesdropping on conversations and checking personnel movements. He can track what Scarlet is doing with ease, and can usually piece together AVALANCHE's movements as well from the data Shinra collects on them.

In addition to information, he provides to Tseng passwords and instructions for how to open and alter certain files to fox Shinra operations. The process is cumbersome, as he still must transfer information manually, by telling someone or writing it down and handing it to a Turk to pass along. It would be a thousand times easier if he had two-way computer access and could do all the file manipulation himself.

One day he says, "Why don't you at least give me a PHS so I can call you."

But Tseng shakes his head. "We will follow our orders to the end."

It's annoying, but Rufus understands.

Rufus doesn't always tell Tseng everything, and the information he provides is not always completely accurate; he tells the Turks what they need to know, to get them where they need to be or away from where they need to not be, and that doesn't always require the truth. This is a very dangerous three-way game he's playing, against his father and against Fuhito, played with pieces that have minds of their own and sometimes go off-target or do dangerous and self-destructive things. Rufus does what he has to do to keep his Turks from getting themselves killed.

* * *

Sometimes he thinks about Lazard, when there isn't much else going on. He always got on pretty well with Lazard, back before he knew what he knows now, and he wonders how long Lazard knew. Probably always, he guesses; that would be why Lazard was a company Vice President, just like Rufus. But the man never said anything, was never anything toward Rufus but generically affable.

In some ways, Rufus longs to talk to him, now that he's dead. Find out more about him, how he grew up ... who his mother was, why she appealed to their father ... what he and their father would talk about ...

Rufus remembers the way Lazard looked at him, the last time they were ever together, back in Junon the day after his birthday; the memory fills Rufus with an uneasy kind of anger. So, Lazard wished he had the kind of close relationship to their father that Rufus had? In his moments of anger, Rufus wishes Lazard _had_ known their father better, known him the way Rufus did, known what it was like to live in fear in his own home.

But in his more uneasy moments, Rufus is glad that things were the way they were. His father is _his_ father, and Rufus would not willingly share.

* * *

Rufus is reading Scarlet's emails when Tseng walks in on him and says, "Veld has been captured. Can you find out where he's being held?"

"I can try." Rufus starts to think about where Veld might be. "When did this happen, and where?"

Tseng tells him; it was Corel Prison, twenty-one hours ago. He gives Rufus as many details as he can. The Turk's voice is calm but Rufus can see the quivering bundle of nerves behind the façade. "I'll try," Rufus tells him again.

Once Tseng is gone Rufus flips through security feeds, looking for the transport convoy that left Corel Prison to return Veld to Midgar. He finds the record without much trouble, and tracks through the feeds to follow it back to Midgar. The convoy split up in Sector Two, but six of the vehicles returned to the depot and contained only soldiers, so Rufus digs up the video records of the journey the other two took.

Four and a half hours later, Rufus is looking at a live feed from Veld's holding cell in one of the city's trash processing facilities, in the interior of the Sector Five plate. For a while he just looks, thinking about what kind of effects he can expect if he tells Tseng. Because telling Tseng is, of course, a choice.

The cell in which Veld is being kept is probably about the same size as Rufus's little suite would be if all the rooms were combined into one. The view is false-color, because the cell is completely dark and the camera is infrared; everything is washed-out gray, except for Veld, who is warm and therefore in shades of greenish-white. Details are hard to make out, but Rufus imagines it is probably filthy, reeking of garbage from the facility, and from the way Veld is sitting, with his arms around his raised knees, it's probably cold, too.

As Rufus is making up his mind, a priority message is broadcast across the executive listserv: Veld has been captured, and is to be executed in four days. Additionally, with this development the Turks are being officially disbanded. It's signed by the President himself.

"That's interesting," Rufus murmurs to himself. Why do that? Why not just kill him _now?_ Why announce it to the department heads this way? What use does, say, Hojo have for this information? He can just imagine the look on Hojo's face as he reads this.

Well, with four days to go, Rufus doesn't need to come to any decisions this minute. He goes back to reading Scarlet's email, not because he expects to find anything but just so there will be something in front of him in case a Turk wanders in.

Had Rufus never been caught with AVALANCHE, never been locked up this way, and had this thing with Veld still happened regardless ... how would all of this be playing out now? Rufus imagines he probably would be thinking of Veld quite straightforwardly, as a traitor, and really the man _is_ a traitor, but ...

But ... but.

So is Rufus.

* * *

It would be bad, he decides, to tell Tseng where Veld is being held. Tseng will, of course, race off to rescue the ex-Director, and who-knows-all will go with him, and there is a good chance all of them will be killed in the attempt. Veld is a Turk - one of Rufus's Turks - but he's only one person.

Nevertheless, after Rufus has slept on it, he raps on the door to summon Tseng.

Reno and Rude come with him; they're both eager to find out what Rufus has discovered. They'll surely head out with Tseng, Rufus thinks, which is the whole point, and he hopes desperately they make it out alive. The three of them can't all fit into this room with Rufus, so Reno enters with Tseng and Rude stands in the door.

Rufus hadn't expected Reno and Rude to come in that way, but maybe he can use this.

Tseng's mouth is pressed into a line as he looks at the feed from Veld's cell. "Where?" he asks.

"I'll tell you," says Rufus, "but I have a condition."

This doesn't go over well. Rude stares; for a moment so does Reno. Then the outrage starts. How could Rufus even _think_ of putting a string on this information, after everything Veld has done, for all of them and for Rufus in particular ... Rufus lets it go on for a few sentences and then cuts them off. "This is not a negotiation," he says, raising his voice to talk over them. "Either you agree, or you can find him for yourself." He touches his computer, shuts off the feed.

Tseng silences his subordinates, and then says, "What is the condition, sir?"

Rufus looks past Tseng at Rude and Reno. "Excuse us please, gentlemen."

They don't want to go, but they can't argue, so they go. When the door is shut behind them, Rufus looks at Tseng.

This is, in many important ways, a trade-off for Rufus. Tseng will probably hate him for this, and if everything works out correctly the other Turks will, too.

But it is a trade-off Rufus must make, and he thinks he can live with the Turks' hatred. The consequences of not doing this, of not making the trade, are too terrible to imagine.

Rufus wishes he'd been able to be with Reno, one last time, before all of this went down.

He tells Tseng the condition, and watches pure disbelief spill across Tseng's expression. "I don't know if I can do that," says the Turk.

"You're going to have to. And it has to be you."

"I might kill him." Tseng thinks, and then says, "Trig is a better shot with a gun than I am. He can do it and make it non-lethal."

"No," says Rufus, and he makes his voice cruel. "It has to be you, and you can't tell _any_ of them what you're doing. They have to believe that Veld is dead. All of them have to believe that."

"But ... sir ..."

"All of them," Rufus repeats. "No exceptions. They have to see you, _you,_ Tseng, pull the trigger and execute Veld. You have to do it, and you can never tell anyone the truth."

Tseng struggles with himself for a moment, and then says, "Why?"

"That's not your concern." Sometimes a piece can't know why it is being moved the way it is. "You're going to tell any observers that you're executing Veld as a traitor to Shinra. After you've done it and you're alone with the other Turks, you will tell them that it was on my order. You're going to tell them that the condition I imposed was that you kill Veld, and you went along with it because at least this way he could get a clean death."

Again, Tseng asks him why, and again Rufus refuses to tell him. "It doesn't matter," Rufus says. "This is my condition. Take it or leave it. He's due to be executed by Shinra in three days."

Rufus watches, then, as Tseng's expression hardens, freezing into that smooth, neutral mask. "Yes, sir," he says, and the words are stiff. "I ... suppose I must take it."

"Good." Rufus tells him where the cell is located, and then as Tseng is leaving he turns and gives Rufus a long look. He's angry, worried - Rufus can see it - probably because he's concerned that he won't be able to make the shot as precisely as needed. Later, when he's told all of these lies and deceived the other Turks in multiple ways, Rufus thinks that Tseng will probably start to hate him.

Rufus can live with that.

When Tseng is gone, Rufus goes into his small bathroom and straightens his tie, checks his hair; Rude gave him a haircut last month, but it's getting a little moppish. Rufus wets his comb and forces it back a bit.

When his hair is tamed, Rufus goes back in and sits down, picks up a book and his journal, and begins to read. There's no point in trying to follow the action on his computer; either he's right, or he isn't, and either way the matter is now out of his hands.

He reads, takes notes, diagrams the germ of an idea that he has about the relationship between matter, mind and magic, and waits. There's a squirmy feeling in the lower part of his stomach, like nerves or something. He'd feel better if he had a weapon, but it would have been pointless to ask for one. The nervousness gets worse as the minutes tick by.

Some hours later, the door clicks. There is no tap.

Rufus's heart leaps into his throat. He stands up as the door opens, tugs his coat to make it neat (because he _must_ be perfectly groomed), pretends to be surprised and says, "H-hello, father."

The look on the man's face is dreadful, and Rufus is suddenly very afraid; it's an emotion he hasn't felt in more than three years but he falls back into it easily, like a comfortable overcoat. The President is _furious_ and no wonder ... this whole business with the Turks must be frustrating beyond measure. It's _stress_ that does it. It's always stress.

Then Rufus's father steps forward, and Rufus has to hold his ground by willpower alone, and the man's arms wrap around him and he is pulled into a tight hug.

"I knew it," his father says, and his voice almost cracks. "Oh, my boy, I knew you'd do it."

"Yes, father," says Rufus, stiff, frightened, confused by the fierce embrace. Then, belatedly, he remembers the game he's playing. "What did I do?"

The President steps back and pulls Rufus toward the door. "Come on, we have to get you out of here."

Leaving the confined space that has been his only environment for three and a half years, especially so abruptly, is a surreal experience. His father pulls him through the Turk offices, which gives Rufus a vague sense not unlike déjà-vu ... he recognizes these halls and rooms and doors, but his memory has altered the layout and the reality does not quite match up. It's like visiting a place for the first time and yet being somehow familiar with it already.

He doesn't have time to think about it. His father rushes him through the department - clear of Turks, because any who were in the office this morning went with Tseng - and into the restricted-access elevator that will let them exit the department.

"I knew you'd do it," says his father again, relief coloring his words. He is holding Rufus by the wrist, tugging him along, and Rufus is still holding his book and journal. "Those damned Turks are probably going to rescue Veld, but it doesn't matter anymore now that I have you back."

Rufus says nothing. This is happening so fast, and his father's very presence is almost overwhelming; he'd forgotten how tremendously his father fills a room. The President swipes his keycard and selects the seventieth floor, then pulls Rufus into another hug.

They reach the top-floor office, and Rufus's father is telling him how his hands were tied with this Turk thing because they had Rufus in custody. The office is huge - it seems much bigger than he remembers - and he has a moment of vertigo at not being closely surrounded by walls.

He reminds himself, again, that this is a game. A dangerous game, a game where people can get killed and will be if Rufus does not play it carefully, and maybe even then. He has to pull himself together, not get bowled over by the force of his father's personality, which is much more difficult to do than it was to imagine.

"You knew they were gone, and you could come get me," he says, musing as though just now figuring it out. "How did you know?"

"How did I know you were using your security clearance to pass info to them, you mean?" The President sounds smug rather than angry, which is a good sign. "How else could they have always been two steps ahead of Scarlet?"

"I didn't do that because I wanted to." Rufus tries to put a little anxiety into his words, isn't sure if it sounds right.

"Oh, I know." His father pats him on the shoulder, comfortingly, and then picks up the phone and calls Scarlet, and tells her that it's okay now to start killing any Turks she finds.

Rufus thinks he'll probably sound very convincingly anxious from this point forward, because now he really is. He knew there was a high probability of this happening - it's one of the risks of this move - but it's hard to listen to his father sign his Turks' death warrants.

_They know how to take care of themselves._ He reminds himself of this.

He is then asked how the Turks gained his compliance, and he lies. He tells his father that at first he didn't really understand what was going on, and that later he simply didn't dare go against them. "They didn't threaten me. They didn't have to. I know what they can do."

"It's all right," his father says, and he takes a seat behind the vast desk. "It worked out in the end. I knew they'd be looking over your shoulder so I gave them something to see that would send them running."

It's a serious relief for Rufus to know that he read that listserv message correctly - it wasn't for Hojo or Heidegger, it was for _him,_ and it was for the Turks to receive through him - because that means that he read the underlying context correctly as well. This risky move he's making, this terrible trade-off he's making, it's not for nothing. If he hadn't done it, the President would still be making his own move, against the Turks, but in a time and manner that Rufus could not predict.

This is better. Rufus can deal with this, because he knew when and how it was coming, and could plan accordingly.

His father now thinks that Rufus had no idea what was going on, and it's time to plant the next seed.

"Tseng said something before he left," says Rufus. "He's actually been kind of moody for a while now."

"How's that?"

"I don't know, but I think Veld running off upset him. When I showed him where Veld is being held, he said something about finally making it right." Rufus pauses, reminds himself that his Turks are in danger and why, and lets that worry creep into his voice. "I'm glad I'm not going to be there when he gets back."

His father starts to say something, but then he glances down and says instead, "What's that you've got, boy?"

Rufus looks down as well, at the book in his hand. "I've been reading a lot. I didn't have much else to do."

For some reason, this makes his father look a bit irritated. "I shouldn't have left you there so long. You know why I did it, though."

"Yes, father," says Rufus. "It was hard at first, but I understand now."

The irritation clears, and his father smiles at him and says, "I missed you. You know I love you, more than anything."

The words are almost like a physical blow; for an instant Rufus can't breathe. All of his low-grade anger, all of his calculating thoughts about this dangerous game he is playing against that man behind the desk, it all falls away, and all Rufus can do is stand there as his grip on his emotions wavers.

"I love you, too, Dad," he says in the end, and his voice quivers on the last word.

* * *

Rufus is not to return from his "extended overseas assignment" just yet. His father thinks he needs to be hidden away again, so that the Turks don't attempt to re-abduct him.

So Rufus is sent to Kalm. It's not a Shinra town, exactly, but the company maintains some property there, and it's near enough to Midgar for Rufus to stay in close contact. He's flown out to Kalm under cover of darkness, accompanied by a small special-ops squad and two SOLDIERs.

This requires a bit of adjustment for Rufus. The rooms in the manor house seem enormous to him, he wakes up in the morning disoriented and doesn't know where he is, and there's not a Turk to be found anywhere. He doesn't know what to make of the two SOLDIERs his father sends with him; he just knows he doesn't quite trust them. Maybe it's their look. Maybe it's the way they dress.

It turns out that he is in even worse physical condition than he'd feared, and he can't go up even one flight of stairs without becoming winded. It disgusts him to be so weak, and he wishes he had time to exercise some. He thinks, however, that his little game is going to wrap itself up in the next day or two, and he needs to be on top of it when the endgame arrives. So he spends his time much the same way he did when confined: on the computer, observing and collecting information.

The evening following his arrival in Kalm, his new PHS rings. It's his father.

"Tell me again about Tseng," says the President. "You said he told you something before he left. What was it?"

_This is it._ "Something about making things finally right," says Rufus, and he keeps a firm grip on his nerves. "I don't know what he meant."

"I know what he meant." His father's voice is tight, angry. "He fucking killed Veld."

Rufus lets a long silence lapse, and then he says, "Wow. That's unexpected."

"I don't know what to do about this. I can't let this pass, but he fucking killed Veld and I'm told he made a whole speech first about the honor and pride of the Turks and how Veld can't just walk out on that. Then he just stone-cold shot the man."

Rufus is glad he's on the phone with his father and not in front of him, because he can't help the manic grin that spreads across his face at this news. _Yes._ It sounds like Tseng really sold it, despite not knowing what the fuck he was doing. Time for the next move. "What are the options?" he asks his father, scrubbing the glee out of his tone.

"Oh, let me see," says his father. "Welcome them back into the fold. Kill them all. Welcome them back, _then_ kill them all."

"Nothing in-between?"

"Hell with it, boy, I _need_ those Turks! You know what's been going on lately? I'll tell you, it's exactly the kind of bullshit that I have Turks for, so they can handle it, but not this time, because this time the Turks were the ones doing it!"

"Almost sounds like Tseng solved it for us, though."

"I can't just let it pass." His father's voice is hard.

Rufus has to let another little time go by in silence, as though he is thinking about it. Then he says, "Punish them."

His father snorts. "You think I haven't thought of that? I don't have time to do that, and if I get someone else to do it, it'll spread what happened around the company. I don't need this getting out more than it already has."

"Scarlet?" suggests Rufus, knowing what the answer is going to be.

And, it's exactly what he expected. "Same as killing them."

Rufus pauses, and says with transparent casualness, "I suppose I could come up with something."

Now it's the President's turn to deliberate in silence. Then he says slowly, "I bet you'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"Let's see," says Rufus coldly. "They kept me in a small windowless room for three and a half years, held me hostage against my own father, and forced me to use my security clearance for their purposes. Tseng ultimately used me to get to Veld so he could kill him. Great. He still used me."

"Let me think about this," his father says, but before Rufus can congratulate himself on a game well played, the man adds, "There's going to be a tribunal here in a couple of days, as soon as all the Turks are hauled in."

"... tribunal?" Rufus doesn't like the sound of this, for several reasons, the most important of which is the fact that he didn't anticipate it and has no response prepared. 

"Yes. I don't know, maybe I should just wipe them out and start over. We'll decide it then. I'll definitely take your suggestion under advisement, though."

"Yes, father," says Rufus. He's going to have to do some more planning, it seems.

When they hang up, Rufus finds his journal and a pen, and heads outside. It's dark already, but that's fine; he discovered this afternoon that the sun is very bothersome. The breeze is cool and the air is sweet with flowers. He sits in a chair on the veranda and listens to the rustle of the trees, and thinks about how he's going to handle this tribunal thing. He'd thought he only had to convince his father, but maybe that isn't the case.

The horizon off in the direction of Midgar is very bright. Rufus doesn't really notice, until he sees the moon high in the sky and realizes that the glow can't be that. It's very peculiar, and he considers calling his father back just to ask what it is, but in the end he decides not to bother.

It's probably just a Shinra project of some kind, implemented while he was depressed and not paying attention to that kind of thing. Rufus dismisses the idea, opens his journal and turns so that the light from the window behind him hits the page, and begins to plan.

* * *

Two days later, Rufus learns that the glow was no Shinra project, but was instead the summon that Fuhito was going to use to destroy the world. The world, obviously, goes un-destroyed. The Turks took care of it, although it seems that the majority of them were killed in the process.

Rufus takes this news rather hard, although he is careful to hide it. _After all of this ..._ after he's practically _won_ this game and gotten the Turks reinstated in the company ... they have to go off and get themselves killed.

He's furious at them. Absolutely furious. Because that's better than any of the alternative emotions that want to take hold of him.

He returns to Midgar, since there are only three Turks left and they are all in custody, so there is no further danger of "abduction." He obtains a copy of the incident report and spends a few hours reading slowly through it. There are photos of all the Turks killed by Fuhito's summon, and Rufus makes himself flip through them, looking at all their faces, remembering their voices, the way each would speak to him, the different and small kindnesses each would show to him.

"Damn you," he tells them with an ache in his throat. "I hope you all rot in hell."

The tribunal thing is practically an anticlimax after that. The danger posed to the company by three Turks is significantly less than the danger that would have been posed by fifteen, and it's not too hard for Rufus to persuade the other executives that they can be tightly leashed. As he'd originally believed, it is his father who is the deciding factor, and really it's only his father who needs to be convinced. Rufus channels his fury at all the Turks who got themselves killed as he looks at Tseng, who stands before the tribunal awaiting judgment, and his father believes that Rufus will punish them adequately.

What Tseng thinks, Rufus can't begin to guess. He is quiet, collected, and won't even look at Rufus.

When the proceedings are over, Tseng and Rufus go to release Reno and Rude, who are in one of the holding cells on the science floor. They look up with hope when Tseng enters, and then they see Rufus.

Rude turns into marble; Reno turns red and starts to say something to Rufus that Tseng cuts off before he has a chance to get going. Rufus tells them what's going on - that they are being reinstated, they will be reporting to Heidegger from now on, they will be very closely watched and monitored (so don't fuck up, is the message) - and they listen with silence and undisguised fury.

Just the three of them. Reno, Rude and Tseng. This is all Rufus has left. His composure nearly cracks.

When he's finished, Tseng tells him, "Thank you for speaking up for us, sir."

"I didn't do it for you," says Rufus, and he undergirds the words with steel to keep his voice from breaking. _They can't know._ They can't know Rufus cares at all. "I had my reasons."

And that's the end of it. Rufus knows he's won, just by the way Reno and Rude are looking at him. They're beyond furious, and it's directed straight at Rufus.

Rufus can live with that. If they blame him, that means they _don't_ blame Tseng. The Turks cannot survive if they hate and distrust their leader.

But ... but. If he'd known. If he'd known that only three would survive, maybe he wouldn't have done it this way.

For a moment he considers telling them. _Veld isn't dead, Tseng didn't kill him,_ but he knows he can't. There can be no chance that anyone ever learns the truth, and that means no one can _know_ the truth. Not even Reno and Rude, for whom secret-keeping is a way of life. They care about Veld too much; they will try to assist him again. They'll give him away. Tseng is more disciplined, but if Rufus could have arranged this without Tseng knowing either, he would have.

"That is all," Rufus tells them. They leave; Reno makes a point to "accidentally" strike Rufus with his shoulder on his way out. Rufus ignores it. Once they are out in the hallway, he hears Reno's voice rise and Tseng once again shut him down.

They can't survive if they hate Tseng, and they need to hate someone. Rufus needs a functional department more than he needs friendship.

He tells himself this is the only way it could be.

It's true.

It doesn't help.


	6. Sephiroth

Rufus "goes back to his interrupted overseas assignment." He's not entirely sure why, but he has conjectures. Maybe because he's pale, and weak, and just _looks_ like someone who has been in prison for three years, and that needs to be cleared up before a lot of people see him and notice. Maybe his father still thinks that the Turks might try to recapture Rufus and use him again. Maybe his father just isn't used to having him around, and needs to ease back into that, or thinks Rufus needs to be eased back onto society.

Regardless, he returns to the manor house in Kalm, with only one SOLDIER this time and small squad of regular army and some support staff for the house. The three remaining Turks stay in Midgar, and reports start crossing Rufus's desk about their activities. It's all normal Turk business - SOLDIER recruitment, mainly, also a few assorted other bits - but there isn't as much of it because three Turks can only do so much.

This is the first time Rufus can remember that he has lived without one or more Turks within calling distance. He discovers quickly that he doesn't like it. He always feels at least somewhat insecure, unsafe. Who is checking the residence, to be sure there are no bombs or wiretaps? What if he gets a visitor? Who will be there to provide intimidation? He doesn't get any visitors - his presence in Kalm is under wraps for one thing - but he has frequent and somewhat irrational thoughts along those lines, and along the lines of what-if-the-building-catches-on-fire, and what-if-terrorists-attack, and what-if-I-need-to-go-somewhere-who-will-make-sure-the-car-or-helicopter-is-ready-and-safe. He's armed again, with knives and a concealed shotgun, but he's so out of practice and so _weak_ that he doesn't really feel like he can protect himself.

For this reason only, to soothe his nerves - absolutely _not_ because he's starting to feel lonely without his cabal of ravens - Rufus tries to get to know the SOLDIER that was assigned to him. The man is no-nonsense and straightforward, a native of Mideel it turns out, of laconic manner but swift action when it's needed, and his name is Zerist.

It's now that Rufus realizes that he doesn't really know how to get to know people. He first tries to approach Zerist like he would approach a new business contact, but the superficial small talk suited to the negotiation table is no way to build a real connection. Then he tries, awkwardly, asking Zerist questions about himself and his life, and while this seems to amuse the SOLDIER it only gets Rufus some polite but very brief factoids about the man (such as the from-Mideel part).

Finally Zerist takes pity on him, and tells him, "Sir, I'm really not a very interesting person."

"I have to be able to trust the people around me," says Rufus, defensive.

"You can trust me, sir. I'll protect you with my life if need be. But if it's all right, let's not try to become friends."

"I'm not trying to become friends!" Rufus tells him angrily, and then, "I certainly don't need _you_ as a friend!"

Zerist bows, and says, "I couldn't agree with you more, sir."

Rufus winds up at the upstairs bedroom window, little gusts of air ruffling his hair and clothing, looking moodily out at the road that fronts the house and thinking about Sunny. It occurs to him that he could, now that he is free, check on her in Cosmo Canyon, but he knows he probably won't. There is a non-zero chance that Tseng lied, that the Turks did kill her the way his father told them, and if that's the case Rufus just doesn't want to know. He'd rather think of her living out her last years happy in Cosmo Canyon, giving rides to kids.

But he thinks about his childhood chocobo, and how she was always so happy to see him, and he misses that. He misses that unconditional acceptance that can only be had from an animal.

Maybe he should get another one. But not a chocobo this time. Chocobo are too gentle, too trusting. He wants an animal that will defend itself if anyone tries to hurt Rufus by hurting the beast.

A couple hours of thinking later, and he is back downstairs. "I want a guard hound," he tells Zerist.

The SOLDIER gives him a bemused look, and thinks about it. "That's probably a good idea," he says. Then he goes back to the paper he's reading.

Rufus waits, flustered by this reaction. He's not sure what to do now; a Turk would have taken his statement as intended and asked for more details as to what he wants in a guard hound, and then made arrangements to procure one. Zerist is just ... sitting there, like Rufus told him this for the hell of it.

After a half-minute or so, Rufus prompts, "Aren't you going to ask me what kind of hound I want?"

"I assumed I'd get to see it when you bring it home," Zerist tells him.

Irritated, Rufus says, spacing his words to convey his irritation, "But _you're_ supposed to find one and bring it home for me."

"I'm your bodyguard, sir, not your secretary. I can hardly guard you if I'm running around looking for a dog."

A Turk would have managed both. Again Rufus is befuddled, and he's also furious because of it; he feels like Zerist is making a fool out of him somehow and he isn't sure how. This is getting him nowhere, though, and he stalks off to find another option.

Then he realizes that Zerist already gave him another option. Rufus calls his father's secretary, who understands the implicit demand when he tells her he wants a guard hound. She takes the necessary details from him (an adult, already trained, female if possible, do guard hounds come in white?) and promises to send someone over to Kalm with a hound as soon as possible.

The exchange reassures Rufus that he can still give orders and have them obeyed, and he thinks that maybe he should get his own secretary now. His scheduling was always done cooperatively between his father's secretary and the Turks; with one half of that equation gone, maybe he should have a dedicated secretary of his own.

It turns out that guard hounds do _not_ come in white, so he is sent a black one instead. She arrives with her trainer, a Shinra employee who is almost overcome by the honor of one of _his_ hounds going to the Vice President. The hound is well-trained, with impeccable manners and no bad habits, and she is friendly enough but she has an intense look to her, always taking in her surroundings.

Rufus likes her. She isn't soft and fluffy like Sunny; she's long and lean, with hard paws and sharp teeth, and dark gold eyes that seem to look straight through him. A fighter of an animal. He's told that she can cast a few basic magic spells, and will if there is a need. The hound's trainer teaches Rufus her commands and stays the afternoon to ensure Rufus has it all down. "Play with her, sir," the man tells him, "when you can. She'll work better for you if she's fond of you."

"Does she have a name?" asks Rufus.

"No, sir, not yet. But if you give her one and use it consistently, she should learn it fast."

When it's time for the trainer to leave, the hound gives him a long look while he walks out the door, and then turns her gaze to Rufus. Rufus strokes her head with his hand; her skin is soft, but layered over hard and angular bone. "Do you like me?" he asks her, and she responds by giving his hand a brief lick, and then turning her attention outward again, taking in the room around them.

The hound parks herself beside Rufus's bed when he goes to sleep that night, and is waiting when he wakes up. Rufus takes her for a walk around the grounds, and the hound is alert and all business throughout. Later he decides to throw a frisbee around the garden for her, and her demeanor softens while they play but even then she is always checking the surroundings. She noses into dark corners and listens to sounds that Rufus cannot hear, and sniffs the air. The tentacle sweeping out the back of her neck is constantly in motion.

"You'll never hate me, will you?" he asks her, very quietly so that no one can hear. "No matter what I do." She gives him her full attention while he's speaking, but then is back to scanning the garden.

Rufus names her Dark Nation, and he spends essentially all of his time with her at his side. She has her moods, can be playful, but she takes her job very seriously and she knows that her job is Rufus. Despite recognizing that Zerist is far better physical protection than the hound, Dark Nation's skill set is one that feels familiar to Rufus and puts him at better ease. If the house catches on fire, he has no doubt that Dark Nation will know it long before anyone else, and will make sure Rufus gets out.

* * *

Rufus makes a concerted effort to regain his strength, and having the hound helps. He walks her himself, rather than assigning this to someone else, and soon takes to jogging instead. He practices with his weapons on an improvised firing range behind the garden. He does some push-ups in his bedroom upon waking - just a few at first, but he works his way up.

He starts to watch his father's television appearances for the first time in his life. It's ... impressive. The President gives frequent speeches and interviews. He goes to museum exhibit openings and visits children's hospitals. He gives money to charities, and always makes sure a camera is there, broadcasting the generosity of the Shinra Corporation. He is present when new products are unveiled and their designers explain to the public how much better these items will make their lives. The company is everywhere, in everything, and the President is at the forefront of all of it.

Rufus has no idea when the man finds the time, or even why he does it. It seems like so much _work,_ and for what benefit?

Three months into Rufus's residence in Kalm, his father drops by to visit. It goes well; at dinner they do not speak of the past, of the things Rufus has done or the things the President has done, but of the future instead. The company has historically been a manufacturer of weapons and heavy machinery, and the core of the business today is Mako power, but the President wants to branch out into consumer electronics. The profit margins will be very low, however.

When Rufus asks why do it then, his father says, "To make people's lives better, Rufus. That's what we do."

"Yes, father," says Rufus, not because he believes it, but because he doesn't want to get into an argument about it.

The response doesn't fool the President, and he gives an annoyed little frown. "Improving the world is why our company is everything it is. Even the people in the slums live better today than they did before Shinra." He takes a bite of his dinner and says, "How is it you don't know that?"

"I'm sorry, father." Rufus really doesn't want to argue, not now. "I know, you're right."

They finish dinner amiably, and take a walk around the grounds together. His father approves of Dark Nation and says some complimentary things about Rufus's taste in pets, and they speak some more about the company. Now that AVALANCHE is gone, it's back to business as usual. His father hints that Rufus may be recalled soon to resume his prior role, and Rufus wonders silently how he will manage that without the Turks to put the fear of Shinra into the men and women on the other side of the negotiating table.

Rufus is not asked about the Turks' punishment, which is good because he hasn't assigned one nor intends to. He has an excuse prepared for the delay, but fortunately is not required to give it.

When he and his father part late that night, it is with smiles and a warm hug, and not everything is forgiven but it seems to be at least forgotten on both sides. Rufus waves as his father heads toward the helipad, and calls, "Love you, Dad! Take care!"

After the President is gone Rufus sits on the veranda with Dark Nation at his feet, and thinks. His father _is_ right about Shinra, but only because his father has been the one to set Shinra's vision from the beginning. The reality is that the company is the engine of the world, and the prosperity of the company is the prosperity of all. Just by being profitable and functional, the Shinra Corporation makes people's lives better. There's not any need to waste money trying to "improve the world." The world will be improved automatically, as a byproduct of Shinra technological innovation and success.

The President's vision is not the only vision possible, or even necessarily the best one. When Rufus takes over, things will be different.

That won't be for a long time, though. Rufus will be recalled to Midgar soon, now that he isn't so pale and washed out anymore and his father has seen that. It won't be long before he's back in the action, but his father is in good health and might live another twenty years or more.

So Rufus has a long time to come up with his own vision for the company, and maybe even to start implementing it as he gradually takes control of more of the business.

He intended to bring up Lazard at some point, but the opportunity never presented itself. Rufus thinks it doesn't matter. He will have many other chances.

Except that he never does. Rufus never speaks to his father again.

* * *

Rumors again rise about terrorists. Some of the reports state that it's a remnant of AVALANCHE, others that it is a new organization entirely. President Shinra goes on television, to reassure the citizens of Midgar that the Shinra army will protect them. The terrorists will be rooted out; the company will not allow them to harm the innocent. He is confident and calm, and completely sincere.

Rufus doesn't like it; the mention of AVALANCHE makes him very uneasy. He'd thought AVALANCHE was completely wiped out, and it would certainly be better if that were true. He can't show his unease - he won't have Zerist thinking he is afraid - but Dark Nation is an attentive listener in the small hours of the morning when Rufus can't sleep.

Then a reactor is attacked, and Rufus can just see it all coming apart again, everything going to hell _again,_ his father's frustration rising again and taking it out on Rufus _again ..._ He'd glad he's not in Midgar yet. He has dreams after the reactor attack, bad ones. Dark Nation takes to jumping up onto his bed uninvited after he's asleep, and he wakes from these dreams to find the hound snuggled close, and his own arms wrapped around her.

* * *

Less than a week later, Rufus is wakened in the night by a sharp knock at the door. It's Zerist; there's been _an incident_ at the Shinra Tower. Rufus throws on his clothes and follows the SOLIDER out to the helipad, knowing at that point only that he has to return to Midgar immediately.

It's in the helicopter that he gets the details, such as they are known. A lot of people are dead. Someone, or something, went through the upper few floors of the building and killed every living thing.

"The President is one of the deceased," says Zerist, and his voice is full of sincere regret. "I'm sorry, sir."

With that, what had been an urgent but confusing summons to Midgar suddenly turns into a terrible nightmare.

Zerist's words don't sound real. It's loud in the chopper; it's insulated to block out much of the noise of the rotors, but it's still loud, and those words just don't sound real. "That's not true," says Rufus. He lays a hand on Dark Nation's head; his fingers are numb.

"I'm very sorry, sir."

It's not true. It isn't. Rufus looks at the darkness outside the vehicle. It can't be true.

The rest of the trip passes in silence. Rufus's mind just goes in circles, _it can't be true, it isn't true, it can't be, it isn't,_ while his fingers gently move over his hound's head and Rufus is completely unable to feel the animal's fur. This is ... another bad dream, maybe, or a joke in incredibly poor taste, or maybe someone is just _mistaken_ and when he gets to the Tower he'll discover that his father is at home and angry at being woken early.

This can't be true. It isn't true.

The ride lasts for an eternity, and passes in an instant.

They circle the Tower and then land on the roof, and Rufus tells Zerist to stay in the chopper. "Where ... is he?" he asks.

"Still in his office, I believe," says the SOLDIER.

Rufus makes it down the stairs but not as far as the doorway before someone comes running out of the building. It's Palmer, and he's gibbering. Rufus lays a hand on Dark Nation's head to keep her from leaping at Palmer's throat, but she issues a threatening growl when Palmer looks like he's going to throw himself at Rufus and that stops him from doing it.

"It was Sephiroth!" Palmer cries. "It was Sephiroth! I saw him!"

The man doesn't stop stammering about Sephiroth until Rufus's fragile control snaps and he backhands Palmer across the face. _"Shut the fuck up,"_ he says, and then, more calmly, "What the hell are you trying to say?"

The blow seems to help Palmer get a grip, and he is able to deliver a semi-coherent report after that. He was in the middle of a meeting with the President when screams started from downstairs and then Sephiroth came up the stairs and ...

"Sephiroth is dead," says Rufus, interrupting before Palmer can say it. _And then he killed your father._ It's all impossible. Sephiroth is _dead,_ and Rufus should know; he helped arrange the cover-up.

"Not dead enough!" Palmer laughs, and the sound is hysterical.

Some more people come out of the building then, and Rufus just stares at them as Palmer takes off toward the stairs going up to the rooftop. Dark Nation again rumbles her warning, putting herself in between Rufus and the threat, and this time Rufus does not hold her back. "Who the hell are you?" he asks. He can't deal with this. Not with all this, not right now. But it looks like he's going to have to.

And, in a way, all of this nonsense, all of this _meaningless_ nonsense that is keeping him from walking into the building, is helping. Because it's keeping him from walking into the building and seeing ... whatever he's going to see in there, and making all of this real. Because he is being approached as a Shinra executive, and therefore he reverts into Shinra Executive Mode in reaction. Because it keeps his mind from going back into that _it's not true, it can't be true_ circle.

It's four people and what looks like a big cat, except that it turns out that the cat can talk. They introduce themselves as an ex-SOLDIER - Rufus hadn't known such a thing was possible, it seems as unlikely as an ex-Turk - two members of AVALANCHE, a slum-dweller, and the cat claims to be an escaped research specimen. The man and woman who say they are AVALANCHE aren't anyone Rufus recognizes, and he assumes them to be nobody important in the organization.

"What a crew," says Rufus. This has taken a distinctly dreamlike turn. He feels more than a little detached, as though this is happening somewhere else and he's observing it from afar. Maybe it's the talking cat. That's definitely like something from a dream. But he's still in his Shinra executive skin, and it's only polite to introduce himself. "I am Rufus Shinra," he tells them, "the ... President of the Shinra Electric Power Company." Because, why not. "Do you want to hear my appointment speech?" It's hard to keep from laughing; this just isn't real. It's completely unreal.

He improvises a little speech on the spot, populates it with some unintentional honesty about what he thinks about his father's policies. Then one of the women makes a snide comment about how he likes to make speeches _just like his father,_ and the urge to laugh is completely gone and is replaced by an urge to splatter her brains against the wall; it's only the knowledge that there's an ex-SOLDIER on the balcony with him that keeps Rufus from sending his hound to tear out her throat. There must be something of that on his face, because the ex-SOLDIER sends all the others away, and then he attempts to take Rufus out.

Dark Nation goes for him the moment he moves, and Rufus gets out his shotgun, and they engage in a brief but dirty little scuffle on the balcony. Rufus is simply defending himself, but the ex-SOLDIER is out for blood for some reason, and Dark Nation is the first to go down, caught by the ex-SOLDIER's sword as she casts a protection spell on Rufus. "Why do you even want to fight me?" asks Rufus, as his hound flails and continues trying to attack even though her back is broken and her intestines are smeared across the ground behind her.

"You seek the Promised Land," says the man, and Rufus does laugh then, high and mad. The _Promised Land_ of all things!

"I guess this means we can't become friends," he says.

The helicopter comes to his rescue, then, because Palmer - bless him - told them that Rufus was in danger. Zerist extracts Rufus with the chopper, and the ex-SOLDIER runs back into the building before any more can be done about him. By the time Zerist has dismounted the chopper and gone to look for the vagrant, he's nowhere to be found.

Rufus is injured, but not too badly; Dark Nation, however, is dying. She probably saved his life, with her spell and her willingness to throw herself between Rufus and his assailant to buy him time, and Rufus has never wished so hard that he carried materia.

"You don't have any, do you?" he asks Zerist, and no, the SOLDIER doesn't. Rufus sends Palmer to find some while he sits on the balcony with his disemboweled hound's head on his lap; she licks his palm, and shakes all over, and the tentacle twitches, trying to sway. He knows Palmer isn't going to find any materia in time. The messy slice through her abdomen is too thorough, there's too much pumping blood.

"It's okay, girl," he tells her, and strokes her head. "You did good." She is silent, too disciplined to whine even now, and she licks his fingers. All of the emotions are draining out of Rufus, spilling like his hound's blood across the balcony.

Some of the blood gets onto Rufus's coat, and it clings there when Rufus stands back up a few minutes later. He pulls out his PHS and dials Palmer. "Don't bother," he tells the man, "unless it's a life materia you find."

Then he sends Zerist away. He's back home now, as safe as anyone can make him, and if Sephiroth shows up again it's not like a regular SOLDIER would be able to do anything about it.

Now he just wants to be alone.

The seventieth-floor office is dark, the lights turned down, as though the end came before nightfall. His father is face-down across the desk, with a sword sticking up out of his back; it's too dark to see the man's face, and for that Rufus is grateful.

It's real, now. Rufus's hound is dead, just a body out on the balcony, and here's his father, dead as well, just a body across the desk. Rufus walks across the office to the desk, remembering the last time he was here, just before he went to Kalm the second time, and he sits down on the edge of the desk just like he did then.

There's a queer feeling inside of him, not at all like the blank emptiness that has always come over him in times of grief before; this is a sort of hollowness that seems to hold something within it, something terrible that is in precarious balance. His mind is no longer going in circles, but has become still. Rufus makes himself look at his father's body, slumped across the desk, his face in shadow, never again to raise his voice in anger, or to tell Rufus he's done something well.

What was the last thing Rufus said to him? He can't remember.

_Don't cry,_ he reminds himself. _It will upset him if he sees you crying._

Palmer then enters, stumbling up the staircase from the offices below. He's stuttering something about materia and he's full of apologies and Rufus doesn't even know what else. He says something about the dark, and turns up the lights.

That terrible thing inside Rufus goes off-balance immediately as the lights come up, and he is on his feet and all the way across the office and has slammed Palmer against the wall. _"Why didn't you take the sword out!"_ he screams, the roaring agony inside him filling every word. _"Why did you just leave him there with a sword sticking out of him!"_

Palmer is a coward; he's more than twice Rufus's age and has been a part of Shinra since before Rufus was born, but he blubbers and stammers and cringes before the elemental rage that is Rufus. Whatever kind of excuse he offers is completely wasted on Rufus, who isn't listening except to the extent that the sound of Palmer's voice is like broken glass across his nerves. Rufus hauls back his arm to just cold-cock the man and _shut him the fuck up_ when he's grabbed from behind and pulled away. He fights this, and is about to deliver an incoherent death threat to the intercessor when he sees that it's Tseng.

This is so startling that Rufus's fury dissolves; he hasn't seen Tseng in months, and this is how he presents himself? That's all he can think about, as Palmer scampers away and Rufus's emotions retreat back into that wobbly equilibrium ... how disgraceful he must look, blood all over him, attacking Palmer of all people. He pulls away and runs a hand through his hair to straighten it, and tugs his coat and says, as though he wasn't just in a wild rage a moment earlier, "Get that sword out of him, Tseng."

"Yes, sir."

Rufus moves to the window, as Tseng whips out his PHS and starts calling for more people to come up to the top office. He looks out at the green Mako halo around the Sector Four reactor, and he's quivering inside but feels more stable already. Tseng wouldn't want to see Rufus behaving like a madman, and so Rufus won't do that.

"We're going to have a formal ... a formal funeral." It's hard for Rufus to say it. He realizes he doesn't know very much about funerals; the only one he has attended is his mother's, and he was too young to have anything to do with the preparations.

But Tseng is here. Tseng will know what to do.

"You'll take care of it, won't you?" he says to Tseng.

Considering how much Tseng must hate him right now, it's surprising how gentle the man's voice is when he says, "Of course I will, sir."

"You have to find Sephiroth."

"Of course ... President Shinra."

* * *

The capstone on the worst night of Rufus's life comes at 4:28 AM, when he officially becomes "President Shinra." It's a matter of paperwork; he must sign a few documents, and so must a couple of witnesses, transferring all of his father's shares in the company to him and then, as owner, appointing himself CEO. The documents are filed in the Mayor's library. Rufus takes care of it at the desk on Sixty-Nine, because he can't bear to be on Seventy. His father's body has been removed now, but the blood has not yet been cleaned up; the blood on Sixty-Nine, on the other hand, belongs to nobody Rufus cares about, and he must merely be mindful not to smear it on the documents.

The next two days leave Rufus very little time to think. He must get a crash course on all of the company projects that he never needed to care about before. Hojo and the Cetra. Neo-Midgar. The Promised Land. Yes, the _Promised Land._ It turns out that what that ex-SOLDIER said about the Promised Land wasn't just lunatic raving after all; there actually _is_ a project in the works to find it.

"Sure," Rufus mutters to himself at the end of that report. "Why the hell not?" At least now he knows where Tseng used to go, when the Turk would leave him for little stretches at a time. Rufus himself was Tseng's primary assignment, but his secondary one was the supposed last living Cetra.

Rufus is also briefed on the events of the last few weeks, regarding AVALANCHE, and he's flabbergasted when he learns that the sullen red-orange glow he saw out the chopper window as he arrived at the Tower, but didn't really register at the time, is an entire sector of the city, destroyed under his father's order.

"You're fucking kidding me," he says when Reeve delivers this particular update. Finding the Promised Land sounds completely rational in comparison.

"I'm afraid not." Reeve looks tired, disheartened.

Rufus goes to tour the zone of devastation, and the cameras follow him. The sector plate dropped whole and landed on a very slight angle, and buildings and structures crushed in place upon impact. The remains of them jut up from the wreckage, like the ribs of some huge animal. Rufus stands near the edge of the adjoining Sector Eight, looking down at the ruin and surrounded by aides and media; the wreckage is still smoldering, but there is a small army of rescue workers swarming over it anyway, looking for survivors.

The reporters want him to give an interview but Rufus is not in the mood and has them chased away. Regardless of that, the headlines will glow that evening: _NEW PRESIDENT OF SHINRA VOWS TO BRING TERRORISTS TO JUSTICE._ The papers are owned by Shinra, after all, and while they like to report real news, they will invent the news in a crunch.

What Rufus says to Tseng privately is quite different from the headlines.

"These were all ratepayers," he says under his breath. "Even the ones under the plate. This is insane." 

"Yes, sir," says Tseng, just as quietly.

It's Reno who actually did it. He's laid up in medical at the moment, having had a run-in at the plate support with the same ex-SOLDIER who killed Dark Nation and almost killed Rufus. Every now and then Rufus thinks about going to pay Reno a visit, but it probably would not be well-received and so he doesn't.

There are no options except to follow the old President's lead, and claim that the destruction of Sector Seven was the work of AVALANCHE. It's not a very difficult sell, as few know the truth and this is such an atrocity that the idea that Shinra could be responsible is completely alien and never crosses anyone's mind. It puts the taste of bile on the back of Rufus's tongue, however. Had this actually been the work of terrorists, it would have made Shinra very inept indeed to have allowed it to happen.

What the hell was his father thinking? Was it calculated, or just born of frustration and anger?

Rufus's father is cremated that same evening following an elaborate funeral ceremony. For the occasion Rufus dresses in pure white, with no black accents at all. The official story is that the President died of a sudden heart attack, brought on by distress over the fate of Sector Seven; it's maudlin and melodramatic, but the press eats it up, and it's frankly more plausible than the truth.

There is calm within Rufus as he watches his father's coffin lowered into the cremation furnace. Whatever it was that gripped him the night of the man's death is gone now, and he is scoured clean. Everything he's learned the past few days has told him one thing: his father was going insane. The Promised Land. Sector Seven. Signing off on some harebrained plan to crossbreed a Cetra with that red cat creature.

Maybe it's better this way. Maybe it's good that his father died before these crazy schemes escalated further. Rufus says goodbye, and feels nothing. "I love you, Dad."

That night, Rufus goes to bed in his old bedroom; his dreams are full of family, and Dark Nation is in them, too. He wakes early, and stares out into the darkness for an hour or so before getting up. He misses the feeling of a warm body beside him, an animal's watchful gold eyes.

Once he is up, his first order of business is to get some contractors in to start remodeling the family suite. He doesn't want to strip out everything of his mother and father, but he needs to make it his own space, so that it no longer feels like he's being stabbed in the chest when he walks in the door.

"And Tseng," he tells the Turk, who is following him everywhere. "I want you to bring me the files for some of the secretaries so I can pick one to promote up here. Then I want to see what you have on Sephiroth so far."

"Yes, sir."

* * *

A file has been put together for Rufus; it turns out to be Rude's work, the Turk's tidy signature at the bottom of the executive summary. It's dated the morning after Sephiroth's attack. Rufus goes over it during lunch, after he's selected a secretary. It's thick and mainly history: a copy of Sephiroth's SOLDIER service record; old status updates for the Jenova Project that had produced him (Rufus hadn't known about this project and finds that part of the record fascinating); details about the destruction of Nibelheim and the subsequent cover-up, complete with the reports that Rufus himself filed at the time.

He's nearly finished with it when Tseng comes in with a couple more files in-hand, and shows him a photograph. It's a man in a Shinra army uniform, young but dour and serious.

"That's the guy that was on the balcony," says Rufus, recognizing him immediately. "The ex-SOLIDER."

"He's no SOLDIER, sir," says Tseng. He hands Rufus one of the files he's carrying, much thinner than Sephiroth's. "His name is Cloud Strife. He applied for SOLDIER but was rejected. He enlisted in the army instead. Later he was used as an experimental subject by Hojo, for a procedure that is similar to the SOLDIER Mako enhancement process."

"I see." The young man in the picture looks back at Rufus without a hint of Mako in his eyes.

"You'll think this is interesting." Tseng opens the thin file and turns three pages.

Rufus scans the page thus indicated, and then goes back and reads it a second time. "He was at Nibelheim when Sephiroth waxed the town."

"Yes, sir. That's how he got involved in Hojo's experiment, actually. According to his project proposal, Hojo was trying to ..." Tseng hems for a second, and then says, "Re-create Sephiroth."

"And then he was here right after Sephiroth," says Rufus. "Oh, that can't be a coincidence."

Tseng gives Rufus the other file in his hand. "Strife was here first. This is our analysis of Sephiroth's attack and the events that lead up to it." The summary page is signed by Tseng. "But I agree with you, sir. I'd like to keep Strife and his group under surveillance. They may help lead us to Sephiroth. They've left Midgar and are currently in Kalm, but it looks like they may move again soon, possibly today."

Rufus looks up at Tseng. Has the man slept? Rufus can't tell. "Hire more Turks," he tells Tseng.

The order takes Tseng off-guard, and he hesitates. Then he says, "I can't bring on more than one right now. Reno can't walk so he can't train anyone. Rude and I could handle one trainee, but not more than that."

"Hire _a_ Turk then," says Rufus.

Tseng then says, "Sir, let me tell them."

"No." Rufus looks back down at the file on the desk in front of him.

"You're the President now." Tseng lays a hand on the file, to pull Rufus's attention away from it. "There's no need to hide what we did any longer."

What _we_ did? Rufus almost snarls at him. "No," he says again.

"May I at least know why not?"

There are good reasons. It might make Rude and Reno hate Tseng, for lying to them, for putting them through that emotional wringer, and then Rufus would have the very result he needed to avoid in the first place. Then there's Scarlet and Heidegger; Rufus can't risk those two finding out about Veld and hatching some kind of plot between them.

Tseng doesn't need to know that, and Rufus doesn't need Tseng distracted from his important work for trivial reasons. "You may not," Rufus tells him. "Now, thank you for this information, do keep me apprised of any developments."

There are no further arguments. Tseng says quietly, "Yes, sir, Mr. President," and withdraws.

When he is gone, Rufus reviews Strife's thin file; the details about Hojo's experiment on him are skimpy, and Rufus thinks there must be a lot missing. "Why," Rufus asks the photo, "would you claim to be an ex-SOLDIER? It's not like _I_ care." So the lie must have been for the other people who came up to the balcony with Strife. Rufus tries to recall who they were, and can't, so he opens the incident report on Sephiroth's attack. It should be in there, and is.

* * *

Tseng moves quickly on the new Turk, and by the end of the day has hired one. Rufus thinks he must have had some candidates already in mind. The new Turk is named Elena; she's related to one of the Turks killed by Fuhito a few months back. Rufus is required to sign off on the decision, but he trusts Tseng's judgment and it's just a formality.

Rufus meets her the following morning. She looks a lot like her sister but younger, somewhat less poised, not yet at ease in a Turk's uniform, a bit intimidated by him. He tries to encourage this by making a joke about killing her if she fucks up that isn't actually a joke, but her reaction surprises him. Instead of backing down in fear, the way his new secretary did when he said a similar thing yesterday, she instead straightens herself up and puts on defiance.

"I will _not_ fuck up, sir," she tells him. She doesn't even stumble over the profanity. "You can believe that. If I ever did, I'd deserve whatever you gave me."

Rufus likes it, and tells her so, and she leaves with a little glow on her face.

By lunch time, Tseng has taken Rude and Elena and gone after Strife. Rufus tells him before he leaves, "Do whatever you think is necessary. Send me updates but don't wait for approval. I trust you. Do whatever it takes to find Sephiroth."

"Yes, sir."

* * *

With the three Turks gone, that leaves only Reno in the building with Rufus. Since Reno is in medical, and contractors are in Rufus's home in the building, Rufus decides to crash on one of the couches in the Turk offices tonight.

He wakes up in the morning to the smell of coffee, and moments after he sits up a cup of it is shoved in his face. "Here," Reno tells him with an unhappy frown.

Rufus is gracious. "Thank you."

Reno is not. He makes a disgusted sound and hobbles back into the break room. He's on a crutch, and has one pant leg slit up to the hip to accommodate a bulky brace and bandages wrapped around his leg.

The coffee is just cool enough to drink, and has a touch of sugar, exactly as Rufus likes it. "Thought you were still in the infirmary," he calls.

"You thought wrong."

Obviously. Rufus takes another sip of coffee and walks toward the break room. "I wouldn't have come here if I'd known," he says. "I'm surprised you didn't murder me."

"Yeah?" Reno is pouring another cup of coffee one-handed, leaning on his crutch with the other. "What makes you so sure I ain't gonna?"

Rufus sets down his coffee cup and says, "I'll go."

"Take your fuckin' coffee with you."

"Is it poisoned?"

Reno gives him a fresh glare. "No," he says.

So Rufus picks the cup back up and prepares to leave. Reno stops him by saying, "Why'd you fuckin' do it, Rufus?"

Rufus doesn't look at him. "I had my reasons."

Something goes crash behind him, and Rufus doesn't bother to check what it was. "You _know_ everythin' we did for you. You know _everythin'_ Veld did for you. An' then you go an' do _that._ What is fuckin' _wrong_ with you, Rufus?"

"I don't have to take this." Rufus walks out of the break room, saying, "Get yourself put back together, you're useless if you can't walk."

Something else shatters in the break room behind him.

* * *

Scarlet and Heidegger are going to be a problem. The two are collaborators in almost everything - their respective departments fit together like interlaced fingers and they incestuously trade staff - and Rufus has never really trusted them because of that. They are also lynchpins in the structure of the company, ones that can't simply be yanked out and tossed into a pool of Mako (no matter how much Rufus fantasizes about doing that every time one of them laughs).

They know it. They know that Rufus doesn't like them, and they know they are, at least in the short term, effectively invulnerable. Rufus is still young and has come onto the job quite abruptly; Scarlet and Heidegger smell blood.

Rufus doesn't know how _much_ of a problem they're going to be, however, until Reno shows up in his office the following afternoon. He barges straight past the secretary, who tries to stop him from going up to the seventieth floor; even a half-crippled Reno is hardly going to be slowed down by a middle-aged and somewhat timid paperpusher.

The first indication Rufus has of Reno's visit is the sound of his secretary on the stairs, trying to tell someone, "I'm sorry, you really can't go up there, the President is ..." and then sort of strangling off. Then Reno appears, dragging himself up the stairs with his crutch under one arm and Rufus's secretary asphyxiating under the other.

"You'll wanna see this," says Reno without preamble, and he flings something across the room like a tiny frisbee. It's a disc; Rufus leans over and slides it into his computer, discovers that it contains an audio file.

"Warren, go back downstairs," says Rufus, and Reno drops the man to the floor so he can comply.

When his secretary is gone, Rufus plays the file while Reno leans on his crutch and gives angry looks to the leaden sky outside. Two voices speak in low tones; one of them is Scarlet, the other a male voice that Rufus doesn't recognize. They are coy with each other, laughing - at one point they kiss. Scarlet talks about needing to know that she can "count on" the other person, to insert or delete files from the mainframe. Because "who knows what might happen" and Scarlet can assure a steady flow of funds to the man's department, no matter what might occur.

"That's Steron St. John, in IT," says Reno. "He's the only person in Shinra with a mainframe clearance equal t'yours. An' he's got more expertise than you, can change an' hide shit in the logfiles so you'd never know."

"I can see where this might be a problem," says Rufus.

Reno gives him a sarcastic goggle. "Y' _think?"_

"How'd you get this?"

"I got my ways."

Rufus supposes that's all that matters. "Is there any reason we can't kill him?"

"Not really. Might be good. His assistant director is female an' straight, an' pretty upstandin' actually. Don't threaten her budget like your ol' man did, though. That's what sent St. John for a spin. Scarlet's been feedin' him through her black box budget."

"Why don't you take care of that as soon as you're better," says Rufus. "Make it look like a heart attack or something."

Reno flips him off, and then turns to hobble back toward the stairs. Rufus says, "Thank you."

"I dunno what _you_ are, but I'm still a fuckin' Turk, Rufus."

When Reno has disappeared down the stairs, Rufus ejects the disc from his computer, folds it against the top of his desk until it breaks, and drops the pieces into the "to be shredded" bin. This is good, he thinks. The department is still functional. Reno's hatred of him isn't for nothing. Then he calls his secretary and tells the man, as calmly as he can, exactly what is going to happen to him if he ever tries to stop a Turk from coming into his office again.


	7. Costa del Sol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning in this chapter for a kind of secondhand snuff.

Rufus has trouble sleeping. The contractors are done and the layout of his home in the Shinra Tower has been completely rearranged; it actually feels good to come home to it at the end of the day. But when he lays down and closes his eyes, he sees hallways painted in blood, corridors splashed in gore, bodies on the stairs, his father's face shadowed by darkness. The silence around him seems to scream.

After the third night of poor sleep and the third day of fractured concentration, Reno comes into his office at about seven PM; he's walking again, having finally accepted another materia hit for his leg injury. He brings Rufus a report, the kind that shouldn't be sent through interoffice mail. "Steron St. John, found tragically dead this mornin'," he tells Rufus, dropping the file on the President's desk. "Seems he was doin' some kinda kinky sex thin' an' his heart couldn't take it. There's currently a search on for his partner, for runnin' off like that an' leavin' him when he had his attack, but somethin' tells me that ain't gonna turn up anybody. You might wanna promote his assistant director sometime soon, yeah?"

Rufus picks up the folder and opens it. "That is _very_ tragic," he says, and scans the incident summary. Inside the file is tucked a photo of the deceased as he was found. It's quite explicit. "Was it difficult to set this up?"

"Nah. He was squirmin' an' fightin' some so I gave him a hit from the poison before I tied him up. That made it real easy."

"That's good." Rufus tucks the photo away into the file and sets it aside, and then turns his attention to his computer. He's been trying to absorb the contents of the report on the screen for twenty minutes, and it's only just now starting to make sense.

After a minute or so, Reno says, "The fuck's the matter with you?"

Rufus glances at him, and then back to the computer, wondering why the Turk is still here. "I thought you were done," he says. "You may go."

"You look like shit, Rufus."

"Thank you. You may go."

Then, unexpectedly, Reno's voice drops a notch, until he sounds almost concerned. "You sleepin' okay?"

Rufus turns his attention back to Reno, irritated now. "No, I am not. Does that make you happy?"

An angry scowl crosses Reno's face. "Why the fuck would that make me happy?"

"Oh, I don't know." Rufus runs a hand over his face and through his hair, and then he levels a tired look at Reno. "Do I really have to deal with you right now?"

But Reno received a phone call last night, and since then he's been doing some thinking, about what he is and who he is, and what and who Rufus is. "Tell me just one thin' then," he says.

"Oh, _what?"_

"Tell me you had a good reason, at least."

Rufus's exhausted exasperation fades a little, and he thinks yes, he owes Reno that much. "I had good reasons," he says. "I still do." _You can't know. Maybe later. Not now._

And that, Reno knows, is the best he's going to get. He will never know why Rufus had Veld killed that way (and it still burns to think about it, puts a hard spot of painful rage in his chest). But Rufus is the President now, and Reno is going to have to just accept that Rufus is entitled to do things at times that he won't like. Hell, he didn't exactly _like_ dropping the plate on Sector Seven, and he certainly didn't like sticking around after the timer was set to make sure nobody disarmed the system, and he definitely didn't like getting trashed as a result. But he did it, because his President told him to do it, and he's a Turk, and performing a mission successfully is always more important than _why_ the mission must be done.

Last night, Tseng called him and asked him how Rufus is doing, and Reno had to admit that he had no idea because he's been avoiding Rufus whenever possible, and Tseng said, "Find out how he's doing, and make sure he's okay."

And that's as much of a mission as dropping the plate.

"Sir," says Reno, "it's gettin' late."

"Is it." Rufus is no longer looking at Reno. So Reno walks around the desk until he's next to the President's chair, and he remembers how being touched used to calm the man when he was a captive, and so Reno runs the backs of his fingers over the side of Rufus's neck.

"It's late," says the Turk again, even though it's really not all that late. "Why don't you go t'bed?"

Rufus goes still, and says, "Why are you doing this?"

"'Cause I don't like seein' you look like shit, yeah?"

There is very little additional resistance from Rufus; he's just too tired to fight Reno, or question Reno's motives. Reno takes him downstairs to the elevator, dismisses his secretary and assistants on the way through, guides him to his own floor and then in his door.

It's actually the first time Reno has ever been in the Shinra family home, and he knows it's been recently renovated but he can't know how it was changed. The layout reminds him of the condo in Junon, only bigger.

Rufus has no idea why he's here; he's just going along with Reno because he's tired, and because he wasn't actually getting anything accomplished in his office anyway, and because it's easy to revert to old habits when he's exhausted. And because watching Reno walk around his living room poking into cabinets is suddenly very nostalgic and Rufus wishes desperately for the casual intimacy he once had with his Turk but has no longer.

Reno finds what he's looking for, pulls a glass and a bottle of bourbon out of the liquor cabinet, and gets Rufus to drink some. Then he puts Rufus to bed, and sits with him, and Rufus (always something of a lightweight, and having not touched liquor in four years now) becomes very intoxicated very quickly.

When he wakes it's dark and he's alone, and he's still about half-drunk, but his mind will not rest and he gets up to go find more whiskey, wondering dazedly why he hadn't thought of this himself. That's how he discovers that Reno is still in the house, sacked out on the couch just like he used to in Junon, and Reno is instantly awake and armed the moment Rufus comes out of the bedroom but he puts the weapon down when he sees who it is.

"Why ain't you asleep?" asks Reno. There's a greenish rime over everything, the halo over the Sector Three reactor coming through the floor-to-ceiling window, and a faint yellow sodium glow from the city's lights.

"I don't know." Rufus touches his mouth, has a confused liquid-memory of having kissed Reno before falling asleep. "What time is it?"

Reno checks his PHS. "Not even midnight. Go back t'bed."

The greater part of Rufus yearns, aches, to go over to the couch, sink down into Reno's lap and kiss the man; he knows, vaguely, that he kissed Reno earlier tonight, but doesn't recall the context or how it was received. He's almost still drunk enough to try it, but not quite, and the sobriety in him knows that if he does that, if he tries to kiss Reno, Reno will probably just pull away, turn aside, and refuse him, and Rufus doesn't want to deal with that. He finds the liquor cabinet in the green darkness, pours some whiskey sloppily into a glass, downs it in one gulp.

"Y'oughta put some water in that, yo," Reno suggests. "That's expensive shit, an' you can't be able t'taste it that way."

"Good night," Rufus tells him, with half a slur.

When he wakes again it's morning, and he feels drugged and heavy, but that's an improvement over the no-sleep-at-all he's been getting lately. He can smell breakfast, and he lays in bed wishing things could be the way they'd been in Junon, when Reno would make him breakfast and sometimes give him a blow job before work. Or even how they'd been when Rufus was held in the Turks' back office, and Reno would drop in on him unexpectedly and fuck him into the wall.

Rufus recalls the photo that was included with the report Reno brought him, and it gives him a lazy, drowsy kind of heat. He gets up, and finds that he has a mild headache.

The food is from the building kitchen; Reno hasn't cooked. He's in the middle of his meal but there's more for Rufus. He gestures at the table but Rufus hesitates; much of the furniture in the suite is the same, and this the table at which he dined with his family for most of his life.

He sits down, and must stifle the reflexive moment of fear. Reno is not his father. Reno will not shout at him, nor lose his temper with him and throw him to the floor.

"Feel better?"

Rufus asks him, "Why are you here?"

Reno takes a few moments to respond, and then tells Rufus that he just wants to make sure he's okay, but it takes him a lot of words to express the thought and he starts to ramble. In the middle of his explanation Rufus interrupts. "I kissed you last night, didn't I?"

"... yes."

"I won't do it again."

After that they eat their breakfast together in silence, and Rufus goes to take a shower. When he comes out, in shirt and pants but no tie or coat yet, Reno is standing at the window, looking out over the city; Rufus really has no idea why he's sticking around and he wishes the Turk would just go away. He misses Reno's easy company too much. This Reno, a Reno who hates him, is best experienced from a considerable distance.

The tangible glow of Reno's hatred is cranked back at the moment, though, and is almost bearable. Reno says, "I didn't mind you kissin' me."

Rufus can't handle that, so he says, "There's no reason for you to be here." _So leave._ He can't seem to make himself add that part.

It proves unnecessary; Reno is intelligent and hears it anyway. "I gotcha," he says, and he crosses the room to the door, lays a hand on the knob, and adds, "But. You want me t'come back, just say so."

He opens the door, is walking through, and then Rufus says, "Wait."

It's weakness, and Rufus knows it. It won't be what he wants, because Reno hates him. He does it anyway. He says, "Wait," and Reno waits, and comes back into the apartment, and closes the door behind him.

They wind up on the floor, and at first there are no words (nor any need for them) beyond _slower_ and _yes_ and _there_ and _Reno_ and _yes._ Rufus comes quickly, as he always has, and while he waits to regain an erection he teases Reno nearly to orgasm and then backs him off, then does it again so that Reno is almost crazed with lust. He says to Reno, "Tell me about when you killed St. John."

Reno is breathless, his hands gripping Rufus's arm, and he groans, "What d'you want t'know?"

"Everything. In detail."

Reno is not thinking clearly, and he doesn't know at that point just how strange things are about to become. So he starts talking, tells Rufus about catching St. John asleep, waking him up with a gun to his face, the man figuring out that he was to be killed and deciding he had nothing to lose by fighting back, and so Reno gave him a disabling hit from his mag-rod and a partial dose of poison to make him quiet.

"Couldn't let him, y'know, bruise himself all up," explains Reno. "It's supposed t'be a normal sex game, consensual-like, gone bad."

The verbal picture that Reno paints supplements the memory of the real photo in Rufus's mind - the photo of St. John tied naked to his bed, blindfolded and with a sex toy sticking out of him - and it's doing things to Rufus. Makes him think about being that helpless, so subject to Reno's whim. Reno killed St. John; his whim was lethal when he did it, and there was nothing to stop him.

"Tell me more," whispers Rufus, and he tongues his way down the side of Reno's neck. Rufus still has his shirt on, but nothing else, and even that is starting to feel like too much; Reno's clothes are laid open but none have been removed. There's a tightness in Rufus's groin, and he knows he'll be hard again soon.

As Rufus delivers another slow hand job, Reno tells him more. How he administered about a half-dose of poison, which made St. John's heart began to fibrillate, and made him hysterical with terror and put him into a type of shock so that he was all but incapacitated. How Reno stripped him down, tied him to the bed, spread his legs and inserted a vibrator into him, then switched it on and forced an orgasm out of him.

That description goes straight to Rufus's cock, and it starts to thicken. He asks, "Why?" and Reno says he did it to get semen onto his victim, so that the sex-game story would be the most logical interpretation of the facts. Reno tells how he left the vibrator inside St. John and finished giving him the poison, a drop at a time, killing him with exquisite slowness to better mimic a real heart failure ... The story becomes more difficult to tell as Rufus teases him to the brink for a third time, and now Reno is so hot and so crazed the words just kind of drop off his lips, sentences no longer firmly connected to one another.

"Be careful," Reno warns, as he grips Rufus's shoulders and cools off, "or I'll flip you over an' fuck you int'next week."

"I might like that," says Rufus. Oh, he would very much like that.

That doesn't happen, mainly because Reno was not expecting sex and didn't bring anything with him. What does happen is Rufus sitting on the couch with Reno on his knees on the floor blowing him. Reno is sloppy and passionate about it because he's almost out of his mind, and Rufus runs his fingers through the Turk's hair and it's _so much_ like those times in Junon, before all the bullshit, before Reno started to hate him. It takes a while for Rufus to come the second time, but when he's close he pulls Reno up onto the couch with him, and kisses him, and they touch each other, and it's clumsy and sweaty and Rufus's hand goes astray once and Reno laughs a little. Reno has his tongue in Rufus's mouth when they come, and Rufus breathes in the Turk's moans.

In the aftermath, Rufus lays quiet and drowsy with Reno atop him, and they are wrapped against and around one another; the scent of sweat and sex surround them. After a while Rufus has to get up to go take another shower and get re-dressed, and Reno leaves while he's doing that.

There's a stain on Reno's hip; he puts his hands in his jacket pockets so he can pull the fabric around to conceal it. He leaves the building, goes back home, and on the way he, too, remembers the condo in Junon. He remembers Rufus once asking how he'd ever live without Reno, and at the time Reno responded something along the lines of, "You wouldn't."

Once he's home, Reno calls Tseng and says, "President Shinra is doin' okay."

When he hangs up, he wonders if sleeping with Rufus has become part of his job description, and, if it has, he wonders if he minds.

* * *

Sephiroth is spotted in Junon. Or, rather, the thing running around the continent that currently looks like Sephiroth is spotted in Junon.

Actually, it seems like Sephiroth went out of his way to be spotted in Junon, killing a couple members of the Junon garrison in public, then vanishing. Tseng has already pointed Strife's group in that direction by the time he calls Rufus, but it's going to take a while for them to get there because they are going at a literal walking pace.

"I'm coming there," Rufus tells Tseng.

"That's not necessary, sir."

"I'm sure it isn't, but I'm still coming to Junon."

Tseng hesitates, and then says, "At least give us a couple of days to secure the town."

"All right," Rufus tells him. "Three days." Then he hangs up and buzzes his secretary to tell him to start making arrangements for relocation.

Tseng doesn't ask why Rufus wants to be in Junon, but Rufus asks himself, and finds he has no articulate answer. Sephiroth is there (probably). Sephiroth killed his father. ... After that, the logic breaks down.

Sephiroth is a positive threat, to Shinra's authority, to Rufus's safety, to the company's reputation and wellbeing. But Rufus's personal presence is not needed; there's nothing he can do, personally, against Sephiroth. It doesn't matter. He still wants to be there, be on the scene when Sephiroth is captured.

He isn't going to say that, though. He knows how stupid and possibly insane it would sound. So instead he comes up with a plan to, essentially, tour the Shinra empire, which is something he realizes that he really needs to do anyway so it's not like this will be just an excuse. He should stop by all the major Shinra installations, to connect (or reconnect) with the on-site administration, to remind them of Shinra's power, to supplant his father in their minds as the head of the company, to put the fear of Rufus Shinra into them.

He's in the middle of working out his itinerary with three of the company trip planners when Heidegger storms into his office, and confronts Rufus about the Turks. Rufus is annoyed but hears him out anyway - the upshot is that the Turks are one of _Heidegger's_ departments, reporting to _him,_ and yet he didn't know they'd been ordered to find Sephiroth until just now. Furthermore, he had to find out through back channels, by asking why in the hell Rufus is going to Junon at all. He doesn't appreciate being undercut this way.

To be honest, Rufus hadn't even thought about it. He's still accustomed to the Turks reporting directly to him, and it hadn't even crossed his mind that he should have gone through Heidegger (or, at the least, redrawn the org chart appropriately). It wasn't right, going around Heidegger the way he did.

But on the other hand he's not going to take this kind of shit either, especially in front of witnesses, so after Heidegger is finished ranting Rufus stands up, pulls out his shotgun and points it at the man's head, and tells him to go back downstairs and talk to his secretary about making a fucking appointment.

"Things aren't like they were with my father," Rufus tells him, as Heidegger retreats with a terrified holy-shit-who-is-this-lunatic look on his face. "You don't just walk into my office whenever the hell you like, and you sure as hell don't do it and then give me a lecture. If you're so _interested_ in what the Turks are doing on my orders, why don't you get on finding Sephiroth yourself?"

Unlike Palmer, Heidegger is no coward, but he knows a serious threat from a bluff and can see that this is no bluff. He takes several slow steps backward, saying, "I'm very sorry, sir, I'll make an appointment next time."

Rufus lowers his weapon, resting the muzzle on his desk, and recalls the problem with Heidegger: the man is in charge of the army. Rufus can't lose control of the army. It would be a disaster, and possibly fatal. But Heidegger is unpopular amongst his subordinates. "Make yourself useful," Rufus tells him. "I want to review the garrison in Junon when I arrive there. Make arrangements."

"Of course, sir," Heidegger tells him, and Rufus can see the wheels spinning in the man's head.

He makes sure they are the right wheels by saying, "I want to see a _ready_ and _well-ordered_ garrison. No fuck-ups by the grunts, Heidegger, or it's on you."

Heidegger assures him that there will be no fuck-ups, and Rufus is satisfied. Heidegger leaves, and Rufus sets his shotgun down on the desk next to him and returns to plotting out his itinerary with the now-terrified trip planners.

The next day a letter appears on Rufus's desk. It's from Hojo, and he says he's resigning. Rufus can't help a frustrated growl, and he forwards the letter to Heidegger with a note. _Deal with this for me, too._

* * *

Going to Junon is a serious undertaking, one that Rufus had not really anticipated. He is accustomed to traveling light, with one to three Turks and some baggage; a single helicopter should be able to take him and all his possessions and personnel anywhere he wants to go.

Now that he is the President of Shinra, an entire infrastructure must travel with him. The amount of equipment and number of people coming to Junon with him is a little staggering, enough to make him seriously reconsider it. There aren't enough choppers in Midgar to carry everyone, and a lot of the people and gear go a day early in multiple waves.

The entire tour is going to be like this, he realizes, and suddenly feels tired.

But he wants to be there, so he goes.

There is more than just a review arranged when Rufus lands in Junon. It is a full-on parade. It's not what Rufus expected, and he briefly considers refusing to go along with it, but in the end he relents; it's not like Sephiroth could have missed his arrival anyway what with the medium-sized army of aides and assistants coming with him. So why not make a parade out of it?

The parade is broadcast worldwide, and it's even fun. Rufus is not required to give any interviews, just sit in the back of an open car, smile and wave to people who shower him with adoring cheers. The city is decked out in banners for him, and on Rufus's orders each banner conveys an understated but unmistakable break from his father's policies: _A New Age._

Heidegger marches at the head of the parade, as proud as a new father, and is clearly pleased with the way the garrison turned out for Rufus. Once the parade is over, however, Rufus takes the opportunity to ask Heidegger, in front of a group of soldiers from the garrison, about the airship and the large transport plane. The next stop on the itinerary is Costa del Sol, and if Rufus is to cross the ocean with his enormous retinue, he needs more than just choppers.

So he asks about the other options, because knows what the answers will be.

The airship _Highwind_ is currently under retrofit and not flightready, and the Gelnika-class transport stationed in Junon suffered some damage that might have been sabotage and is being repaired. Neither is airworthy, and Heidegger must admit to it out loud when Rufus inquires. Heidegger starts to laugh, nervous at being caught responsible for unprepared aircraft. He has a braying kind of laugh; Rufus doesn't like to hear it, and Heidegger knows that.

"Stop with that stupid horse laugh," he tells Heidegger. "I told you, things are different now than they were when my father was in charge."

Heidegger sort of chokes himself to stop the nervous laughter, and Rufus asks him about the ship, _can you at least get a ship ready in a shipping port full of them_ is the question within the question. The entire exchange leaves Heidegger so wound up and angry that Rufus, as he's walking away, actually sees the man physically assault one of the garrison soldiers.

Later, Rufus takes Reno and goes to the airstrip to look at the _Highwind,_ genuinely disappointed that he can't use it yet. The airship was built while he was in custody in Midgar, and he's never seen it before. It's beautiful - long and sleek and silver, like a racing animal currently tethered and sleeping - and it hovers, bobbing with great majesty in the wind, as though disdainful of the ground. While there, and while walking to the airstrip and back (Reno offers to get a car, Rufus refuses), he finds ways to engage in conversation with the Shinra army soldiers that he encounters. A small question here, an offhand compliment there. It's all very shallow and superficial, and it's not like Rufus actually cares, but he can provide a decent simulacrum of caring so long as his interactions are very short.

Some of these soldiers might remember him from when he lived in Junon for a time, and others won't, but he knows that by tomorrow morning the rumor mill will have spread stories of his behavior throughout the garrison. He makes himself an appealing target for loyalty, much more likable than Heidegger.

Rufus spends three days in Junon. He takes a report from Tseng the first evening, after the parade and just after returning from the airstrip. To Tseng's consternation, the Turks have lost track of Strife's group somehow. They entered the lower town, but are no longer there, but they haven't left nor have they entered the upper town. That's irritating to Rufus, and he starts to think about what might be done about that in the future. The Turks just have too much ground to cover, too many tasks, and there are too few of them.

Tseng looks dispirited when he gives Rufus his report, and Rufus instructs him to take Reno with him and take a couple of days off. When the Turk objects, Rufus insists; he's in a Shinra city surrounded by a quarter of the Shinra army. If Sephiroth attacks, he'll have a lot of people to go through to get to Rufus, and that should give Rufus some warning at least.

The Turks won't really stop working, Rufus knows, but maybe they'll at least work from a bar somewhere.

He spends the second day visiting the garrison and touring the facilities. _Now_ he gets a review, and Heidegger is so worked up that he's terrorizing the soldiers whenever Rufus turns his back. Rufus smiles and puts on his most charming face, even stopping a few times to ask a couple of random grunts some semi-personal questions; he knows it _makes their day_ to have the company President feign an interest in them. He talks to the garrison commander (a different fellow from the one who was in charge when Rufus lived in Junon, Rufus wonders what happened that that guy) and reminds him who pays the bills and who can have commanders removed with extreme prejudice. A hint: it's not Heidegger. The commander all but swears his undying fealty.

That second evening he is invited to a dinner party by some of the people with whom he used to socialize when he lived in Junon. He accepts. They behave differently toward him now, their attitude toward the President different from what it had been toward the President's son. One of the women he used to date is there, and she flirts with him; she's changed some, although he has a hard time figuring out how, maybe she's dressing differently or has her hair up or something. However that works out, she's much more attractive now than she used to be, and Rufus seriously considers inviting her home with him, thinks he might give that heterosexuality thing another spin.

Halfway through the dinner he spots Tseng, standing near the restaurant's entrance, although probably Tseng's been there since the start, and Rufus has to remind himself not to stare. Turks always look good, really good - well-dressed, sharp, lethal, like a well-made and functional weapon - and Tseng has the quintessence of a Turk. Rufus remembers kissing Tseng, and is no longer interested in taking his lady friend home; he beckons Tseng to come home with him instead. He's had a couple glasses of wine, is more than slightly intoxicated, and he invites Tseng into the condo.

Tseng is sober and easily puts the young President to bed (alone).

The next day is Rufus's last in Junon, and he spends it with the nominal city government. Like Midgar, Junon has a mayor and even a city council, and like in Midgar they are elected in fair elections only because nobody else is permitted by Shinra to run. They serve a few useful administrative functions and Rufus makes sure to remind them that the company makes a brilliant friend and a terrifying enemy.

That evening, there is more bad news: no trace of Sephiroth has been found in Junon. Shipping has been shut down since the attack and it can't stay that way, so Rufus reluctantly must re-open it and continue on his tour. "This is terrible," he tells Tseng, who agrees. They don't speak of Rufus's clumsy and drunken pass at Tseng the night before. "We've lost him, haven't we?"

"I suspect he won't stay lost long, sir." Tseng thinks that Sephiroth has an agenda. He just doesn't yet know what it is.

* * *

The ship is loaded, and Rufus boards it the following morning with Heidegger next to him. He makes sure to provide one last positive experience for the Junon garrison by giving the send-off guards a worthless little token that they will no doubt cherish forever.

The trip would be only a few hours in a helicopter, but more than a day on a sailing vessel. The Turks are left in Junon, to continue to search for signs of Sephiroth and to follow later in a chopper. The first part of the trip is dull, and the most exciting moment on the first day out is when Rufus finally gets fed up with Heidegger laughing at his own terrible, unfunny jokes and threatens to feed him his eyeballs. He dines with the captain in the forward cabin, and prior to the eyeball comment he listens to a lot of Heidegger's babbling about troop strengths and how Sephiroth cannot possibly escape the net that the army is spinning for him. After the comment, Heidegger is quieter, and Rufus congratulates himself and wishes he'd thought of that sooner.

The second day, during the approach to Costa del Sol, Rufus is startled during breakfast by the sound of alarms. The captain excuses himself to go find out what is going on, and Rufus stabs at his eggs, his appetite more or less ruined by the noise.

"The Turks cleared this ship, didn't they?" Rufus mutters, and then he turns to Heidegger and asks again, "Didn't they?"

"Yes, sir, they did," Heidegger tells him. "I'm sure it's nothing, just a false alarm."

The Turks wouldn't let Rufus get on a ship with a dangerous individual, so Rufus finishes his breakfast, and in the process he completely misses what later turns out to be an extraordinarily hazardous event. It's only after the ship has docked in Costa del Sol and Heidegger has wandered off to supervise the unloading that the captain returns, ashen, and he gives Rufus an update.

People are dead, a lot of them. The lower decks are covered in blood. Rufus listens, his expression frozen into one of calm near-indifference, but his mind is full of the memory of corridors smeared in rusty red, slashes taken out of the walls, his father dead in the dark, pinned to his desk by an enormous sword.

"There are a few survivors from the lower decks," the captain tells him. "They say there was a man in a black cape or cloak, and several more individuals who appeared to be working as a group."

"Was one of them blond, with Mako in his eyes?" asks Rufus, and he is told that yes, one was blond, but nobody noticed if he had Mako eyes or not. There was also a red animal, a trained fighting cat, and then Rufus is sure. Some kind of combat took place in the cargo hold. Nobody witnessed it, only discovered the gruesome aftermath.

The captain is full of apologies for why the carnage was not discovered sooner, early enough to delay docking and trap the perpetrators on board. They've probably escaped by this point. Rufus nods, dismisses him; the implications disturb him.

He disembarks, and there's a chopper waiting to ferry him to the company vacation estate; it's the one outside town, as Rufus has put the main-street villa up for sale. As the massive Shinra administrative machine is unloaded from the ship around him, Rufus runs into Heidegger, so he covers his disquiet with irritation and unloads it on his subordinate. Not only Sephiroth, but _also_ Strife and all his cronies were on the ship with them, and Heidegger's people didn't notice! There aren't words in the language for the magnitude of this cock-up. How could they have missed that big cat thing, anyway? Heidegger is apologetic, just like the ship captain, but Rufus is not in a forgiving mood. He wants Sephiroth found. This was a missed opportunity, and as far as Rufus is concerned, Heidegger is the one to blame.

* * *

Tseng is appalled. He arrives at the Shinra Corporation seaside vacation house a few hours after Rufus, and as Rufus explains what happened on the ship he watches all the color drain out of the Turk's face. "We should never have left you alone," says Tseng, and he's practically whispering.

For Tseng, however, Rufus has no condemnation. "I told you to stay in Junon," he says.

"I shouldn't have listened."

"You should always listen to me, no matter what I tell you. Even when it's stupid."

Tseng doesn't argue, but Rufus can see that he's not buying it. Oh, well. Rufus can't be angry at him. At least now they have a good lead on Sephiroth; they know where he was this morning.

It's then that Tseng brings up what Rufus already knows: the Turks don't have enough personnel. Tseng wants to keep one Turk with Rufus but that's impossible if they are to investigate leads on Sephiroth and also track Strife.

Rufus silently curses both fate and his father, for the events that lead to this inexcusable dearth of Turks. He remembers Cissnei, and Kat, and has a strange moment of heartache for their loss. "I'll tell Heidegger to cooperate with you and let you use his people." Rufus knows that the Turks have taken to using army squads from time to time in the past couple of months, so this is hardly unprecedented.

A frown briefly touches Tseng's mouth, and Rufus knows what he thinks of this. "The army is good for waging war, sir," he says, "not covert operations."

"Take all the Turks," Rufus tells him. "I'll use the army for personal protection. Surely they can do that much."

But Tseng reveals that he has another idea for tracking Strife's group. He describes a project in Urban Development, one that sounds familiar to Rufus once he gets into it. A remote-controlled reconnaissance robot, that can be disguised as anything; Reeve favors a design that looks like a cute children's toy. If one can be placed with Strife's party, then no further effort will be required on the Turks' part to keep track of them.

"And what do you think the odds are that someone claiming to be an ex-SOLDIER will accept a cute children's toy?" asks Rufus.

It turns out that Strife has picked up another hanger-on, reputedly a barely-pubescent girl. Tseng has high hopes that this individual will think the toy is adorable and want to keep it, or, failing that, one of the other women in the group will pick it up. If it doesn't work, a different design can be constructed and tried, but these toys are already built and tested and ready for deployment.

It's worth a shot, and it can't hurt to try. Rufus gives his okay, but still insists that Tseng take _all_ of the Turks with him. "Before you go, though," he says, "I'd like to talk to Reno."

Reno is smart, and knows that this summons isn't about talking, so he comes prepared. They meet in the third-floor office, to maintain the deception that this is just a private consultation of the ordinary kind, and at first Reno has his bristles up and Rufus wonders if this was a mistake and the two of them are back to acrimony. It takes very little time, however, for Reno to transmute his simmering anger into sexy-as-hell straight-up aggression, and to force Rufus over the desk. He's rough about it, more so than Rufus expected, but it's exciting and Rufus fights back knowing that he can't possibly win. Reno eventually subdues him, binds his wrists with his tie, and then Rufus taunts Reno into screwing him.

It's hard, and deep, and messy and a little painful, and Reno rolls him over to push his face onto the desk top until Rufus has difficulty breathing at times. He comes hard, and then must continue to submit until Reno has come, too, and is finished with him.

Then they clean up and Reno leaves, and Rufus remains in the office for a while wondering what he'll do if Reno ever gets killed.

That night, Rufus can't sleep. He tries. The sound of the waves hitting the shore outside is soothing, and there is a breeze coming in the window that is fragrant with salt, but when Rufus closes his eyes he can smell the tang of blood, and hear Zerist's voice. _I'm very sorry, sir._ He eventually gets up and resolves it with two glasses of bourbon.

* * *

Rufus spends a week in Costa del Sol. The town is a lazy one, hot but breezy, populated by people who prefer all their days to be uneventful and all their nights to be bright. The weather makes Rufus abandon his vest and switch to lighter fabric for the length of his stay, silk in his suits instead of wool. The screw-up with the ship haunts him; they _had_ Sephiroth, but he got away. He still blames Heidegger.

The mess in the ship's cargo hold is analyzed, and it turns out to be chopped and barbequed bits of Jenova. Elena does the investigation, supervised by Rude, although this is Elena's first encounter with Jenova and it's Rude who makes the identification. They destroy the remaining fragments. When Elena files her report with Rufus, she tells him, with uncertainty in her tone, that some of the pieces were still moving.

Tseng and Reno leave town together to return to Midgar, and then come back to the western continent with some of Reeve's recon toy robot things. They plant four of them along Strife's likely path. Reeve has already programmed them to tell fortunes, so they put one in Costa del Sol, two in the Gold Saucer, and one in Cosmo Canyon so that Strife will surely run into at least one eventually. Rufus thinks it unlikely that Strife will want to take a toy into his band, although it amuses him to think of the man going to sleep with a plush cat in his arms.

Costa del Sol is a popular vacation spot for Shinra employees, and the economy is so dependent upon Shinra shipping and Shinra tourism that it's practically a Shinra town. Rufus spends the week socializing with all of the local notables; no threats are necessary here, only promises to maintain the status quo (they already understand what will happen if the status quo is altered). He goes to the theatre. He attends dinners. Work comes to him from the home office, and he spends hours on that every day, taking care of what he must and delegating the rest. Executives fly in from Midgar for meetings. Rufus goes home alone and drinks himself to sleep.

There is no hint whatsoever that Sephiroth is in Costa del Sol, and Strife's party leaves town the day after they arrive, heading toward the mountains. They don't take the cat toy with them.


	8. Rocket Town

Hojo is found in Costa del Sol, and Heidegger's forces take him into custody. Rufus goes to see him, to find out what the hell he thought he was doing, trying to _quit_ the _company,_ as though Shinra were just any corporation and a high-ranking executive can simply resign. He brings a squad with him, just in case Hojo tries something, but the man is not interested in Rufus at all and doesn't seem inclined to dispute his detention. "I've had my fill of the beach," says Hojo. Rufus has him shipped back to Midgar and put under surveillance.

It's a victory for Heidegger, and Rufus decides to give him a little verbal pat on the head for it. His simple, "Good work," makes Heidegger preen and makes it that much more satisfying to prick his pride afterward by asking, again, after Sephiroth.

"The Turks are on it," says Heidegger.

"Yes," says Rufus in return, "but are _you?"_

When his week in Costa del Sol is up, the massive Shinra infrastructure is loaded into another vessel for the journey up to the northern continent. There's a dig of some kind there and a town has sprung up around it; Rufus's father had provided a lot of the funding and some of the personnel. Rufus visits the rather literally-named Bone Village, to forge a connection and maybe figure out if he wants to continue funding the dig, or maybe have it carpet-bombed. A battalion from the army meets him there, to replace the soldiers Sephiroth killed on the way to Costa del Sol.

It's a very different town from Costa del Sol, and _very_ different from Junon. The majority of the people here are neither Shinra employees nor directly beholden to Shinra, and the expressions on their faces when they look at Rufus and his security detail range from indifference to outright dislike. A few look at him in thinly-disguised fear, and Rufus thinks that's a fine thing.

He is given a tour of the site, and then the next day the dig's lead researchers provide him with a presentation of their current findings and future goals. It's two men and three women, and all of them have the stink of academia around them; never in their lives have they had to turn a profit, but have instead been privileged to spend other people's money. The dig is about half-related to the excavation of the fossilized skeletons of extinct animals, with the other half having to do with the Cetra. They believe that there was a Cetra settlement in the area, long ago. "But the Cetra never settled anywhere for long," one of the researchers tells Rufus, "so the signs are faint." A few post-holes, some ancient hearths. A field where the Cetra carefully sowed their trash, so that the remains would be absorbed by the earth.

It sounds like as much nonsense to Rufus, so he says, apropos of nothing, "I've heard that Mako deposits have been discovered up here. This might be a good spot for a new reactor."

It's not true - Rufus has heard nothing of the sort; there was a project once to build a reactor much farther north but it was an expensive failure and Rufus has no inclination to restart it. However, everyone knows what happens when Shinra decides to build a reactor somewhere. Everyone knows what changes take place in locations where a reactor is successfully completed, how Shinra wraps its tendrils around the economy and around all local institutions, bringing everything within the company's stranglehold. Everyone knows what happened to Wutai when the island nation attempted to refuse Shinra. Rufus throws that out there just to put them on edge.

The reaction he gets, however, is remarkable. Two of the researchers start to babble denials, and a third one raises his voice to speak over them with an even more emphatic denial. No, sir, Rufus is assured, there is _no_ Mako of any significance within a hundred kilometers of Bone Village. Just traces, as everywhere. "I invite your geologists to verify that!" says the man, with a nervous laugh.

"Rest assured that they will," says Rufus. He smiles, and knows it is not a nice smile.

The remainder of the presentation has to do with financials; since Shinra provided a significant grant to this project, Rufus is entitled to know how the money was spent. He doesn't pay much attention, as it is something he can go over in better detail later by himself, and instead he nods at the right places while thinking about why these people are so anxious to immediately deny the presence of Mako in the area. There must be some here; either that, or something else is hidden in the ground, something they don't want Shinra to discover.

The weather in Bone Village is much cooler, and Rufus is able to switch back to wool suits, which is good; he felt very uncomfortable - unprotected - in thin silk. The weather also makes his wrist ache, which is not good at all. He catches himself rubbing it at times, the dull throb reminding him of healed breaks; the pain puts him into a touchy mood, makes him cranky. He's in one of these cranky moods when he realizes that this dig is another of those projects being undertaken solely for the joy of it, because the people involved are passionate about the knowledge they hope to uncover and no other reason. From what Rufus can tell, his father's interest in it was related to the Ancients and the Promised Land, but for the researchers it is something more fundamental and pure.

It isn't a lot of money, but after he comes to this realization Rufus decides that even one gil would be too much. He sends a memo back to the home office: _Cease all funding, effective immediately._ He doesn't bother to tell the researchers that he has just cut their support. Shinra is not the sole benefactor of the dig, and Rufus has no doubt that these _people_ will somehow find a way to keep doing this thing that they love.

He could not despise them more.

* * *

The day before Rufus is scheduled to leave Bone Village, when the mobile company administration is already in the process of being broken down and re-loaded into the ship, he is visited in his improvised office by the most senior of the researchers and begged not to build a reactor. It's an enlightening exchange for Rufus, because if there were no Mako here there would be no need for such groveling; it confirms for him that he has hit upon a local secret by complete accident. Rufus pretends otherwise, claiming to have possession of an analysis that reveals rich Mako deposits in the area, and the researcher tells him that his guess is dead on the money by asking him what she can do to persuade him not to build.

"A reactor could be exactly what this area needs," says Rufus. "Cheap energy, good jobs ..."

She cuts him off, which he thinks, with amusement, is quite rude. "President Shinra," she says, "a reactor is the last thing this area needs. Please. Tell me what I have to do to make you reconsider."

She's dignified about it, but her words are nevertheless full of desperation, and Rufus likes the taste of it; he keeps his expression straight and serious so as not to make it obvious that he's playing with her. He's thinking about what kind of answer he wants to give - what will produce the most interesting response - when his PHS rings and he checks the display.

"Stay right there," he tells the researcher and flips his PHS open. "What do you have for me?"

"Strife ran into one of the robots in the Gold Saucer, sir," says Tseng without greeting or preamble. "He has it with him right now."

No way. "You are making that up," Rufus tells him, astonished, and then he starts to laugh.

"I assure you, sir, I am not," says Tseng. "It's assisting them with combat."

Well, that at least makes a modicum of sense. Rufus makes plans to call Reeve later to arrange for regular reports. But Tseng has more news: Heidegger has reassigned the Turks to Scarlet. Strife got word that Sephiroth was last seen heading toward Gongaga, which aligns with the Turks' information, and Scarlet wants to personally investigate the reactor there. Heidegger has ordered the Turks to assist her.

That seems odd to Rufus; the Gongaga reactor is offline, destroyed somehow during Rufus's confinement. There should be nothing there, for Sephiroth or for Scarlet. But the reassignment of the Turks is a power play, one so transparent that Rufus wonders if it's a diversion of some kind. Or, he thinks, maybe it's a test, to see how much Rufus will allow, what he'll let Scarlet and Heidegger get away with. To see if he's too busy to notice this, or doesn't care enough to say anything.

The tone in Tseng's voice is asking him to countermand Heidegger's orders, but Rufus says, "Then you will assist. Keep me apprised, of anything you hear. From _whatever_ source."

"Understood, sir." And Rufus knows Tseng does understand.

"I still want at least one Turk to meet me in Wutai. If Scarlet or Heidegger give you trouble about that, let me know."

"Yes, sir."

He hangs up, turns his attention back to the researcher, who is just sitting there, waiting while he takes care of other business, and he thinks, _If only she were a he._ She's older than he is, hair lightly streaked with silver, has some padding in the hips that a younger woman might not but she's comfortable with herself and that comfort makes her very attractive. Rufus knows his father would have asked her to fuck him - more like forced, told her that if she wants him to fox the reactor she'd have to put out - and it crosses his mind that he could do that himself. The thought puts warmth into his groin, lets him know that he could get an erection with little effort.

And, he sees suddenly, she knows it, and is prepared for him to say it. He can't tell what her answer will be if he does, and that makes him want to issue the demand, just to find out.

Instead he says, "Tell me why you don't want a reactor."

He expects something like, _they're unsafe,_ or _they attract terrorists_ (same thing really), or _we don't want be under Shinra's heel._

What she says is, "The land here is very beautiful, President Shinra. We don't want it to become dead, like Midgar."

Anger rumbles like a thundercloud across his vision, and Rufus says, "Get the hell out of here."

* * *

The next morning, after he's bathed and is dressing, he pauses with his black turtleneck shirt in his hand and looks at himself in the mirror. He used to be in better shape, before he was held captive; he's recovered much of his strength, but a good bit of softness remains around the curves of his shoulders and the plane of his abdomen. He runs a hand over his belly, then down and cards his fingers through dark gold curls.

There are no marks on his skin, no bruises, no dark-red stains like splashes of wine betraying a recent break beneath the flesh. His wrist hurts, aches, as though his father's hand has it in a tight grip, and he rubs it, but no hint of the pain is visible on his body. His father is dead, and he will never again see those things in his reflection.

For a few minutes he wonders why he's bothering with any of this. He doesn't have to; the ship is loaded but there's no gun to his head forcing him to continue on the next leg of his trip. He could just as easily sail back to Junon and, from there, head to Midgar. Or just call a helicopter to come get him. He could be back in the Tower by dinner.

He never really wanted to do this. He wanted to be in Junon when Sephiroth was captured, and this tour of Shinra holdings was almost an afterthought, an excuse for him to leave Midgar. Costa del Sol was nice enough to visit, but he managed to ferry Sephiroth across the ocean by accident in the process so ... that was kind of a failure.

Rufus puts on his shirt, and then steps into his boxers, continues getting dressed. His father rarely left Midgar. He sat in the Tower like a fat spider, thinking he could control the world by remote, thinking he could know what was happening anywhere by feeling the vibrations sent back to the center of the web. It worked, in its way ... the Turks were the old President's eyes and ears, and his scalpel; the army was his grenade; SOLDIER was his rifle. He used the media to spread whatever propaganda was needed to wherever it the world it had to go. And between and around and through everything was Shinra money, streams of gil like threads in the web, binding the world to the company, making everyone dependent upon Shinra, grants and paychecks and contracts ready to be pulled or dangled as needed to make others jump and dance.

But that way of doing things leads to crap like this dig on the northern continent, or the space program. Things that, Rufus is sure, sounded good on paper and in reports, but which are a clear waste of time and money when seen firsthand. Rufus doesn't want to depend fully on reports from other people to know what is going on.

Above all, he doesn't want to be his father.

* * *

The next stop is Wutai. It's a long trip, and they hit weather going through the straits; Rufus is in some degree of pain for two and a half days, until they double the cape and turn south and leave the weather behind. For the most part the ache is the worst it's ever been, a constant stabbing throb like a nail through his wrist, with a side-splinter that goes up the ulna almost to his elbow. The deep sway of the ship as it rolls through high waves dissuades Rufus from hitting the booze, just in case it makes him seasick, and experience has taught him that this is nothing materia or potions can resolve. He is back to spending the night sleeplessly staring at the ceiling, with only the pain and his memories of blood to keep him company.

Everyone on the ship figures out really quickly that Rufus's fuse has been radically shortened - the tension oozes off him like a miasma - but no one knows why. It also doesn't help that the tossing sea makes it essentially impossible for Rufus to shave; the two days' growth of stubble is wheat-blond, and therefore not exceptionally visible except at close range, but it makes Rufus feel scruffy and it's aggravating for him to touch his face and feel sandpaper. Rufus is left largely to his own devices, and the crew speak to him only when absolutely necessary. That's how he prefers it, although he wishes his PHS worked this far out to sea, so that he could call Tseng and see what's happening with Sephiroth and Strife.

Then the ship leaves the straits and the weather and stops rolling around, and Rufus finally gets to shave and afterward he goes up on deck to get some air in the misty early-morning sunshine. He feels human again, and the cool sea spray is actually pretty nice; all in all, a definitely improvement. But then Heidegger strolls up to him and begins to talk, in that hearty way of his, about how it should be a smooth trip from here. He starts to tell Rufus about the time his father visited Wutai, right after Rufus was sent on that long assignment, and he says what a shame it is that Rufus couldn't come along because the trip was such a pleasant one and Rufus's father was in an exceptionally good mood and Rufus would have enjoyed it, and then he _laughs_ ...

Rufus can feel his father's hand in the pain in his wrist, and the flood of words from Heidegger suddenly reaches an intolerable peak. His vision turns white - _shut up, shut the fuck up_ \- and an instant later he's punched Heidegger once in the face to _make him shut up_ and Heidegger has grabbed his arm and is holding him back to keep him from doing it again. Rufus finds himself staring at the man, coming down fast off that mad point of rage and he realizes that he just lost control of himself. In front of Heidegger. Heidegger's eyes are wide, his mouth within the black beard slightly open in surprise. Rufus is humiliated.

"Don't talk to me about my father," he tells Heidegger, yanking his arm back, and then to cover why he just flipped like that, "He's only been dead a month."

Heidegger accepts the explanation without question, and backs down. "I'm very sorry, President Shinra. I forgot myself."

"Don't do it again. I don't want to hear him mentioned."

"I won't, President Shinra."

* * *

There's a festival starting in Wutai the evening of Rufus's arrival; he can't tell if this is a coincidence or if it was scheduled specifically for him. He decides he doesn't care. Decorations are everywhere, exotic and beautiful, and people walk around wearing costumes, their faces painted like hideous demons. Everything is in shades of red and black and ivory and gold.

A delegation is waiting for him at the dock: Godo Kisaragi and an entourage, flanked by standard-bearers holding up the arms of Wutai. Rufus descends to the dock with an armed escort, and one of them carries a similar standard, with a banner that bears the Shinra logo. Rufus thinks the whole thing is ridiculous, but Heidegger insisted and Rufus wants to pick his battles.

Godo is the leader of Wutai. His precise title does not translate well, and the closest analogue is "War-king" which is not appropriate for the head of a client state, so he is addressed by the Shinra as merely Lord Godo. He was the Wutain leader during the war; this is the man that Rufus's father defeated. He is overweight, but beneath the extra flesh Rufus can see that he is still a strong man, still a fighter. Godo is gracious to his young overlord, bows respectfully although Rufus is half Godo's age; he has brought a few small presents to the dock and promises that more are waiting in town. He speaks Rufus's language perfectly but with a hint of an accent, like spice in his words.

The moment Rufus sets foot on the dock, a Turk materializes beside him; it's Reno. He says nothing, which means all is well ... if there were any danger here to Rufus, Reno would tell him. Wutai remains a hotbed of anti-Shinra sentiment, and Rufus is reassured that Reno is on the job here.

Rufus is escorted back to the royal estate, where Godo insists on opening a bottle of wine with him. Rufus is staying in the guest house - probably the most opulent suite of rooms he could possibly imagine, with jade and gilding on practically every surface - which means that he takes lunch with his host. Godo inquires as to his health, the health of his company, expresses regret at the passing of Rufus's father with such depth of sincerity that Rufus thinks the man deserves a prize for his acting ability. He pours the wine and says what Rufus thinks he wanted to say from the start.

"What are your plans for our little Wutai now?" The question is casual, offhand. Rufus hears the weight behind the words, the weight that Godo tries hard to conceal.

He turns the question around. "What would you like to see happen?"

Godo is an intelligent man; he doesn't tell the truth. The truth would doubtless be something along the lines of, _I want to see Shinra gone from my country forever._ What actually comes out the man's mouth is, "My only wish is for eternal friendship between Wutai and Midgar."

It's a good answer. It's the right answer. Rufus takes a sip of wine, and says with a smile, "I am certain that the fortunes of Wutai and Midgar will remain aligned."

* * *

Rufus meets with Reno after lunch; the festival proper is due to begin at sundown, but he has a few hours until then. Tseng is not in Wutai. Reno does not explain why, but Rufus can guess and doesn't ask.

Reno first checks the room ("Makin' sure no ninjas are in the rafters,") and then delivers a quick and concise report. Scarlet is after Huge Materia; nobody knows why, Tseng thinks it is related to weapon development but isn't sure. Reno has volunteered to try to get more detailed info out of her and will start on that as soon as this Wutai thing is over. Rufus knows what this means, and he's not sure why but the news puts a tight knot of anger into the pit of his stomach. He tries to keep his irritation off his face, isn't sure if he succeeds.

It is also apparent to Reno that Scarlet is largely unaware of the strong ties the Turks have to Rufus. "She's trying t'turn us against you, sir." He gives a dark little smile, that promises murder. "Ain't workin', exactly."

That's really good to hear, especially from Reno. _In theory_ Rufus knows that Reno's loyalty and professionalism are beyond reproach, but the knowledge of Reno's hatred weighs on Rufus's logic, drags it down into pessimistic places.

Still, this is potentially an opportunity. "Do you think you could lead her on? You know, make her think you might be open to that?"

Doubt crosses Reno's face, and he says, "I ... suppose." He thinks about it some, and then adds, "Won't like it, but I guess that don't matter. Don't need anyone thinkin' I'm some kinda traitor, yeah?"

"I know you're not," says Rufus through his own irrational doubts.

There is more: they knew from Reeve that Strife's group was in the Gongaga area and so Scarlet posted Reno and Rude outside the reactor while she was there, to keep Strife at bay. Of course the Turks ran into the outlaws, and there was a brief throw-down. Nobody was crippled this time by the wannabe-SOLDIER and so Reno counts it as a win. "That fucker hits hard," is his assessment of Strife. "You'd never believe he wasn't really in SOLDIER."

Reno has brought Reeve's own assessment of Strife, current as of yesterday, and he hands it over to Rufus, who skims it. The core of the group is Strife, Lockhart and Wallace, and the Cetra Aerith Gainsborough, all figures that Rufus knows from the Turks' files. The first three are all that's left of AVALANCHE (something that Rufus is _very_ glad to learn, if he just kills those three the terrorist organization will be finally extinct) and the Ancient seems to have been kind of adopted by them. The cat creature, for whom they use Hojo's code-name "Red XIII," is much more loosely attached, and so is their other recruit, a Wutain named Yuffie Kisaragi. Reeve actually has no explanation for why those two are even with the AVALANCHE group. Yuffie, of course, has been positively identified as Godo Kisaragi's daughter.

The interesting part comes after this brief sketch of the group dynamics: Strife seems unstable to Reeve. He often wakes suddenly in the night; he doesn't talk about it, but Reeve thinks he has frequent nightmares. Strife and Lockhart don't seem to be very comfortable around one another despite being, supposedly, friends since early childhood. At times Strife has a strange way of speaking, as though he is reading from some kind of internal script, and his mannerisms sometimes strike Reeve as being perfectly natural and at other times they come across as very affected. In some ways, Reeve writes, Strife behaves like a much younger and more naïve individual than his age would suggest, as though he is a child putting on airs, pretending to be an adult.

He's also utterly obsessed with Sephiroth; Reeve posits that Strife views everything through a kind of Sephiroth filter, that every event is tested for whether Sephiroth could possibly be responsible before any other explanation is considered. He talks about Sephiroth constantly, thinks about him constantly.

Considering what Rufus knows about the experiments Hojo conducted on Strife, it is probably not surprising that the man is a little unhinged. The group is approaching Cosmo Canyon; that's where the cat was originally captured and no doubt where he will part ways with Strife. After that, Reeve thinks they will probably head for Nibelheim, as Strife and Lockhart know where they are and are already talking about looking for Sephiroth there.

Rufus closes the file. "Tell Reeve this is good work," he says.

"Yes, sir."

_I hate it when none of you are around._ Rufus almost says it, realizes how it would sound and doesn't.

As dusk darkens the sky the festival really begins. There are lanterns everywhere, not Mako but oil; the light that falls across the city is as soft and yellow as butter. There is a parade, but thankfully Rufus is not required to take part. It is performed by the locals, dancing and carrying huge puppets down the streets, as unfamiliar music wails weirdly out of the throats of bizarre instruments.

Godo and his guests - Rufus, Heidegger, four of the local business elites - take their dinner on a second-floor balcony overlooking the main street down the center of Wutai, where the parade marches slowly past them and the visitors can marvel over it.

At one point Rufus asks Godo if he has any children, and Godo explains that he had a son who died as an infant, and has a daughter who is "the brightest rose of Wutai." Then he smoothly changes the subject, seeking to shut down further inquiry.

Rufus lets him ramble a bit about the cultural significance of the puppet being carried by on the street. The local religion is focused around a bit of materia of all things, a summon called Leviathan. There's a certain strange logic to it - summon materia is somehow special, and is the only type that has thus far eluded Shinra's ability to manufacture - but Rufus wonders why they couldn't have picked a better summon at least, like Bahamut. The reverence the Wutains have for materia was one of the reasons they lost the war, as they were reluctant to deploy their "holy" summon and they had few other materia, none even close to that powerful.

After Godo has told a little story about Leviathan, Rufus switches back to his daughter. "Did you let Yuffie take Leviathan with her?" he asks. "When she started the little trip she's on right now."

Heidegger gives him a sharp look, but Godo is a much better actor and chuckles. "Not even Yuffie is allowed to borrow Leviathan," he says.

"That's too bad. The road is dangerous sometimes." Rufus smiles. "Would you like me to assign some operatives to keep an eye on her for you?"

Godo assures him that Yuffie can take care of herself, and he lies and says that she hasn't even left Wutai and no one in the country would harm her. Then he looks away and his throat works in a nervous swallow, and Rufus knows that the threat been received and understood.

Confident that Godo will work to ensure that anti-Shinra activity is tamped down, at least during Rufus's visit, the young President relaxes and sips his wine, and enjoys the remainder of the festival.

* * *

Rufus makes the sojourn in Wutai productive. Shinra's claws are sunk deep into Wutai's business community, but Rufus would like to add to the company's portfolio here. To that end he has scheduled visits to twelve firms to negotiate contracts, or to investigate purchases.

It's almost like old times; Reno even joins him, just like he used to. The menace implied by a Turk, however, is almost overkill in Wutai, as this is a nation that has become bloodily familiar with the raw force that Shinra can deploy. Nearly everyone he meets has felt Shinra's touch, in the form of dead children, dead parents, dead siblings or cousins or lovers. Some of them even feel a need to share that with Rufus, as though he is going to care or something.

Fear is everywhere Rufus goes; his name alone inspires it. _This_ is how things should be everywhere, he thinks. As long as people are too afraid of Shinra to act against the company, force need not be deployed. No one need suffer, and Shinra need not expend any resources or gil to maintain peace. A quiet population is good for everyone, but mostly it's good for business, and an intimidated population is a quiet one.

Rufus tours factories, sits down with owners, brings in the legal department (traveling with him) to draw up contracts, or brings in the accounting department (also in his entourage) to do audits. Everywhere he goes he impresses on his hosts that the elaborate ceremony that accompanies everything in Wutai is to be dispensed; Rufus is not charmed by ritual tea-drinking or the token exchange of small gifts. He does things the Midgar way, and so will everyone else, end of discussion.

Every morning he calls Tseng, and then calls Reeve, to get updates on what is happening with Sephiroth. Tseng is stuck with Scarlet, but he has Rude and Elena on Sephiroth's trail and they have uncovered a very interesting development: the remnants of Hojo's experiments that are running loose in Nibelheim have begun to talk about Sephiroth. Rude and Elena have ... interviewed ... them, and report that they moan about Sephiroth, about hearing Sephiroth's voice, about Sephiroth being nearby. "They're also talking about bringing something to him," says Tseng. "They were subjected to a similar process as Cloud Strife. Whatever is affecting them is probably affecting him, too."

"What could they possibly want to bring to the General?" Rufus wonders.

"We don't know that yet."

Reno seems almost back to normal, but Rufus can see the tension in him at times. The red-haired Turk is still angry at him; those two encounters, in Midgar and in Costa del Sol, have not cleared things up as Rufus had hoped. Rufus waits for Reno to say or do something to indicate that he is interested in having sex, and nothing is forthcoming.

It occurs to Rufus that he's had sex exactly twice in the past eight months, and it also occurs to him that he's the President of Shinra now and he shouldn't have to put up with that. He doesn't have the same sex drive he did when he was eighteen, but he still _wants_ it _sometimes_ and twice in eight months is not enough. His father's death rattled him but he's well past it; he wakes up aroused, has no problem jacking off (and why should he have to do that?) He finds himself watching Reno when the Turk isn't looking, waiting for his always-partially-unbuttoned shirt to fall a bit to the side and reveal the base of his throat, and the urge to lick that tender hollow intrudes into his thoughts over and over.

He thinks about sleeping with someone else for a change, someone who doesn't hate him.

Late on the fourth evening in Wutai, he's just poured a glass of the local white liquor when Reno says, "Y'know, if I'd known you were gonna get liquored up every night I never woulda given you that bourbon that one time."

Reno is checking his gun, preparing to set it aside for the night. Rufus knocks back the glass; it smells and tastes like honey and goes down smoother than water, but the shiver that runs up his spine tells him that it's a hundred proof, minimum. "At least I'm sleeping again," he says.

"When you start drinkin' at noon, you an' I are gonna have a talk, yo." Reno snaps the magazine back into his gun and lays it down on the table, pulls his mag-rod off his belt and begins to give it a once-over.

Rufus watches him, wants to touch him. The way his hands move over the weapon, long-familiar, barely having to look at the controls as he tests the structure and function, makes Rufus stare; Reno has slender hands, and long and agile fingers. He'll look over Rufus's shotgun next, although Rufus can do it himself. Maybe it's the alcohol, already hitting him, that makes Rufus say, "I'm surprised you haven't taken advantage of me yet when I'm drunk."

That gets Reno's attention at least; he glances up, sidelong, strands of red hair falling over his eyes. "Been waitin' for you t'say somethin'. You know, sir, all you gotta do is ask." He gives the mag-rod a quick charge, switches it back off. "There's a reason I'm here an' not Elena."

The right response to something like that would be to turn around and go straight to sleep, and the irritated part of Rufus wants to do exactly that. The part of Rufus that has been taking every opportunity to catch Reno's scent - the part that has been imagining his mouth on Reno's wrist, scraping his teeth against the tendons, making Reno take in that short gasp of air - the part of him that is already rock-hard and aching, makes him say, "Take off your jacket."

Reno sets down his rod on the table and stands up, shucks off his jacket, and then without prompting he takes off his shoulder holster and unbuttons his shirt. Then he draws Rufus down onto the couch, and Rufus slides his hands into Reno's open shirt and up his warm back, and Reno tongues Rufus's collarbone to make him moan.

"I wish bein' a backstabbin' prick made you less hot," whispers Reno against Rufus's throat, and he pushes a knee between Rufus's thighs and grinds his erection against Rufus's hip. By now the booze is diffusing through Rufus's brain and he can't come up with a response; instead he just tangles his fingers in Reno's hair and closes his eyes to drown in that sensation of floating and the feel of Reno's mouth.

But it isn't what he wants. Reno goes down on him and that feels fantastic - Reno's mouth is warm on his cock, tongue pushing back Rufus's foreskin and gliding over the sensitive ridge, then heat going down Rufus's erection. The alcohol gives Rufus some stamina for a change, and despite the intensity of the blow job it takes a good ten minutes for him to come. But something is still missing, something seems off, and he's too inebriated by this point to more than wonder what it might be. Reno puts him to bed, kisses him, runs a hand through his hair as Rufus drifts to sleep.

By the time he wakes in the morning, Rufus has forgotten all about it.

* * *

Two days before the end of his stay in Wutai, Rufus has just finished up a meeting with the board of the Wutai custom house, which Shinra is probably going to acquire, and has gotten into his limo to return to the royal estate. He has files and paperwork on his lap that he needs to review before the acquisition is finalized: the portfolio and financials of the company. The firm handles customs in the main port of Wutai under a government charter, which could be extremely lucrative, and simultaneously provide a chokehold on Wutai shipping. His mind is going over everything he learned in the meeting, and he makes note of what he wants the accountants to double-check; he's not entirely convinced that he was told the whole story on the cost of bribery on the docks.

His PHS rings. It's Tseng.

"President Shinra, sir," says the Turk, "do you have a moment? This is important. It's about Sephiroth."

Rufus gathers up the paperwork and sets it aside on the seat next to him. The custom house's bribery schema is gone from his mind. "Yes. Go ahead."

Tseng has been collaborating with Reeve, and between the Turks' investigation and what Reeve has learned by spying on Strife's group Tseng has concluded that Sephiroth is definitely gunning for the Promised Land and has a positive idea about where to find it. To reach it, however, Sephiroth needs to access a special kind of magic, the _ultimate destructive magic_ supposedly, and to do _that_ he must reach the Temple of the Ancients.

"Temple of the Ancients," repeats Rufus, as Reno gives him a cockeyed look. "You're telling me it exists."

"Yes, sir," says Tseng.

"And I suppose you know where it is, too."

"We have a good lead on it, sir."

Rufus isn't sure if this is some kind of miracle or if they should all be committed. The Promised Land. The Temple of the Ancients. Sephiroth is chasing nursery rhymes. Rufus half-expects Tseng to claim next that the Lifestream is a real thing, too.

The connection between the Promised Land, the Temple and this _ultimate destructive magic_ is confusing for Rufus; Tseng tries to explain it, but Rufus gets the idea that Tseng doesn't really understand it either, and in the end it doesn't actually matter. He cuts off Tseng's attempt to clarify and says, "I don't care _why,_ the upshot is that we know where Sephiroth is headed."

"Yes, sir, I believe so."

That's much better than knowing where Sephiroth is now. "This is very good work, Tseng," Rufus tells him.

According to Tseng's information, the Temple is on the main island in the chain south of the eastern continent; the island is heavily forested, largely unexplored and populated by dangerous creatures. Rufus remembers his father sending an exploratory party to the island once, thinking that it could be used as a source of lumber. A month later the survivors staggered back to Midgar, talking about how the very insects of the forest devoured some of the soldiers.

"Sir," says Tseng, "we're going to need air transport, and not a helicopter."

"Why?"

"It's too stormy for choppers down there this time of year, sir. The airship would be ideal, but the retrofit is not complete."

_Fuck._ Rufus can't believe the retrofit is still not complete. He swipes a hand over his face, wondering who needs to be strangled to get the Gaiadamned airship flightready again, and says, "What other options are there?"

"A Gelnika would require us to construct a large airstrip," says Tseng. "So I believe that's out, sir. There is another aircraft we could use, though. It's in Rocket Town. It's small but if we move now we can still get enough people down there before Sephiroth arrives."

Sephiroth is going to need a key to enter the Temple, and Strife is hot on the General's tail and may find the key first. Rufus tells Tseng to concentrate on the key. "I'll get the plane myself," he says.

"Plane?" says Reno, once Rufus snaps his PHS closed.

Rufus quickly fills him in, and says, "I'm going to Rocket Town to get this plane," and then, even though it makes him grind his teeth, "I want you to report back to Scarlet as soon as I'm out of Wutai."

"Yes, sir," says Reno.

Rufus then calls his secretary, explaining that he wants to be on an outbound ship tonight, and telling the man to move however much of heaven and earth is necessary to make that a reality. His next call is to Reeve. Two of Strife's companions - Barret Wallace and the Ancient - left relatives behind in Midgar. "Pick them up," Rufus tells Reeve. "We may need hostages soon."

* * *

Rocket Town is not far from Wutai - just across the narrow Wutai Sea - and Rufus is on land again before breakfast the next day. He brings with him a small army company and lots of vehicles so they can move fast, but none of the Shinra bureaucrats who have been trailing after him. The time for tours and doing business is on hold. Now he needs to jack a plane.

The airplane is Shinra property, and Rufus _should_ just be able to call Rocket Town and have the plane relocated to Midgar or wherever Tseng needs it. He knows, however, that Cid Highwind is not going to surrender it easily. The man is the ringleader of Rocket Town, the one who has been sending missives back to corporate headquarters since the space program was shut down, wanting to know when the company is going to re-fund the program and send him into orbit. Rufus's father replied with platitudes for a while, and then just started to ignore the messages; Rufus read them sometimes when he was locked up, out of boredom.

From them, he knows that Highwind takes a possessive view of the rocket, of the airship (he complained _bitterly_ when he wasn't allowed to keep it after construction), and of the small plane that remains in his custody. So Rufus is going to repossess the plane in person, with the army behind him. No telling what Highwind might do to it if Rufus just orders him to hand it over.

Palmer is the head of Highwind's department, and so Rufus summons Palmer to meet him in Rocket Town. The man arrives in a helicopter and connects with Rufus's convoy before they reach the village, when the rocket is just in sight on the horizon, and joins Rufus in the executive limo. Rufus does not tell him about Sephiroth, the Temple of the Ancients, or anything like that, only that they are taking the Tiny Bronco and returning it to Midgar.

"Oh," says Palmer. "Oh, Cid's not going to like that."

"Fortunately," says Rufus, "I don't have to care what he likes."

The convoy rolls into Rocket Town, and Rufus watches the buildings go by with mild interest. It's a tiny village, barely bigger than the aluminum-silver trailer town that used to house the space program technicians. Just a collection of new wooden buildings, a couple of unpaved roads, a lot of trees and shrubs. It rings the launch pad and gantry in a tight hug, much closer than the trailer town used to be; obviously nobody expects the now-algae-covered and still-tilting rocket to ever launch, or to fall down on them either.

Palmer directs them to a house near the gantry as being Highwind's place, saying that he thinks Highwind keeps the plane in his back yard. The convoy comes to a halt in the street outside, and Rufus sends Palmer in to fetch Highwind.

Rocket Town contains most of the same faces that Rufus met on his first, earlier visit here, when the rocket launch failed. Rufus looks around, recognizes the people who come out of the buildings to gawk at him. The woman who worked on the re-entry system, who told Rufus that she wanted a husband and three kids but just couldn't find the time to date. The programmer with a girlfriend who worked in the Gold Saucer. The old fellow with no technical skills at all, who took a custodian's job just to be near the space program. The physicist who brewed her own beer. All of them had shared their stories with a younger and increasingly-hate-filled Rufus, and he remembers them all.

He wonders if the physicist still brews beer.

Highwind struts out of his house and greets Rufus with a huge grin, and asks, "So when we building a new bird?" Rufus takes a vicious kind of pleasure in telling him never.

"The space program was never more than a money trap," says Rufus. "You're not getting even one more gil out of the company."

It's four different kinds of satisfying to watch that grin drop off Highwind's face, to listen to him splutter. He takes a drag off his cigarette to steady himself and begins to ramble about the _history_ of it, the sheer _imperative_ of reaching space. Can't Rufus see? Can't he understand the wonder and marvel of it, and want to get there, too? Finally Highwind winds up saying, "Fuck me ... but don't ... President Rufus, don't you have _dreams?_ You're still a kid!"

Being called a _kid_ (with _President Rufus_ only half a step behind it in offensiveness) makes Rufus want to crush this man's spirit in every way he can. "Of course I have dreams," he says. _I dream of destroying your dreams._ "My dreams are practical and attainable, and as a consequence they do not involve rocket ships or outer space."

Another drag off the cigarette; Highwind clings to the thing like it's a lifeline. Reno occasionally smokes and so does Tseng, but neither of them do it in front of Rufus (he dislikes the smell and they know it, although Reno's flavored cigarettes aren't as bad) and neither of them does it very often. It's clearly a habit for Highwind, and that only makes Rufus dislike him more.

"You got me all excited for nothing?" asks Highwind at last, all trace of respect gone from his tone. "Then what the fuck did you come here for?" 

"We're taking the Tiny Bronco," says Rufus, and because he's not a cruel man he explains, "We're going after Sephiroth. It seems like we've been going the wrong direction, but now we know where he's headed. We need the airplane to cross the ocean."

Highwind starts to swear, with great vehemence, and Rufus thinks that bringing the army was a good plan; if he didn't have soldiers behind him, he thinks that Highwind might actually walk up and throw a punch at him. "First the airship," says Highwind angrily, "then the rocket, now the Tiny Bronco ... You took outer space away from me, and now you want to take the sky, too?" He takes another drag off his cigarette and spits on the ground. "Fuck you, Rufus."

It's on the tip of Rufus's tongue to say, _You can have it back when we're done with it,_ and if it hadn't been for that last jab he might have. But he can't let that kind of backtalk go unaddressed when fifteen soldiers are standing right next to him and thirty more are back in the vehicles watching. He's the President of Shinra. People will _not_ talk to him that way.

He gathers his dignity and says coldly, "I think you're forgetting something. If it weren't for Shinra, you would have never gotten off the ground at all. You should be grateful for what you've been given."

_"What!?"_ Yes, bringing the army was a good idea; Highwind sounds ready to bite someone. _"Grateful?"_

"Yes, grateful. My father was very generous with you," _funding your dreams, not stepping on them,_ "but you're not _entitled_ to anything. You don't have any kind of fundamental right to the sky. You fly on Shinra's sufferance." Rufus aims a finger at Highwind's face. "You should be grateful for everything you've been given and not think you have a right to more."

"You little ..."

Rufus raises his voice to drown out the profanity. "You've suckled off Shinra's teat your entire career, Highwind, and all you do is complain about what you _don't_ have. Let me tell you about some of things you _don't_ have, like a right to however much of _my_ company's money you need to chase whatever fool idea is in your head."

Highwind takes a final drag off his cigarette, then tosses it aside, taps another one out of the pack in his pocket and lights it; he is silent and deliberate about it, angry but no longer swearing. The smoke off the new cigarette is fragrant, and Rufus catches a whiff of it as Highwind pulls from it.

"When'd you get so cynical?" asks the man at last. "You were cynical the last time I saw you, too. What the hell happened to you to make you this way?"

There's no way Rufus is going to take that kind of treatment, but he has no opportunity to do anything about it because the end of Highwind's question is almost drowned out by the buzzing sound of engines. A few moments later Rufus sees what can only be the Tiny Bronco taking off from the house's backyard.

The plane climbs high very fast, then drops back toward the ground like a shot bird. Rufus is sure it's going to crash but it recovers at the last second and swoops low along the ground; Rufus has to duck for fear of the props taking off his head. Highwind goes running after it as Rufus's escort start shooting at the retreating plane; he sees Highwind manage to grab onto the tail just before the plane darts back up again toward the sky, out of control. There are figures clinging to the wings and fuselage.

"Well, fuck," says Rufus, and then he turns to find out what in all hells just went wrong.


	9. Tseng

It was Strife, of course. Reeve provides the summary: Strife stole the Tiny Bronco, and the gunfire from Rufus's escort damaged the plane and caused it to crash into the ocean. It retains motive power but can't get out of the water, so Rufus decides to let them have it. The plane is of no use to him if it can't fly, but it might be of use to them.

He's not happy that Strife was in the area at the same time he was, though. There's no telling what Strife might have done if they'd stumbled into one another; the guy tried to kill him the last time they met, for no reason at all, and Rufus still misses his hound. This is a serious intelligence failure on Reeve's part, and the Director of Urban Development is full of apologies about it.

"I had no idea you were going to Rocket Town, sir," Reeve tells Rufus. "I would have called you."

Rufus is not appeased. "You told me yesterday they were in the Nibel mountain pass. The pass is eighty kilometers from here, and you said they were on foot again!" It's in this way that he learns that the reports he's been getting from Reeve are on a one day delay. Rufus conveys that this is unacceptable and that Reeve needs to get his shit together quicker than that from this point forward.

Palmer tried to prevent Strife from taking the airplane and was badly injured in the process. Leastwise, that's what he claims; his story is a little inconsistent, and Rufus isn't entirely sure what to believe. In any case, his condition is stabilized at the local clinic and then Rufus decides to have him flown back to Midgar; despite his total contempt for Palmer, he doesn't actually want the fat old loser to die. Rufus will go with him as far as Junon. The airship is now the only viable air transport available.

The chopper that brought Palmer is refueled and they are in the air within an hour. Palmer tries to talk to Rufus; at first Rufus pretends not to hear his conversational forays, but when Palmer keeps at it he has to shut it down.

"Don't talk to me," Rufus tells him. "I'm very angry right now."

Palmer shuts up instantly, and does not make a peep the rest of the flight.

They stop in Costa del Sol after nightfall, where the chopper is refueled and they switch pilots. Rufus gets out for a while to get a bite to eat and take a piss, and just walk around and stretch his legs; then they cross the ocean overnight.

Rufus takes a nap while the helicopter is flying through the darkness, and discovers that the vibration of the vehicle and the incessant low-pitched hum of it is as good at soothing him to sleep as liquor. He just leans the seat back and goes straight to sleep. No memories of blood follow him into his dreams. He doesn't wake until mid-morning Junon time, when the helicopter comes in for a landing, and he feels better than he has for weeks.

Rufus orders the chopper to be refueled again and take Palmer back to the Tower for proper treatment, and then he goes to get a status update on the airship. It would be better if he could get Heidegger to do this for him, but Heidegger is still en route from Wutai and Rufus can't wait.

"I'm sorry, Mr. President," says the chief engineer with a slight stammer, "but the airship is a complex ..."

Rufus is not in the mood and the sniveling tone just hits him all wrong; he slams the engineer face-first into the wall and flips out one of his knives, and presses the tip into the hollow under the man's ear. The guy struggles a little, but Rufus has been trained to fight by the Turks and this is just a scrawny office worker, and the engineer goes still when he feels the point of the knife prick his skin.

"S-sir?" he squeaks.

"Day before yesterday," says Rufus, and his voice is dead steady, "I was asking myself who needs to die to get this retrofit finished. Can you answer that question for me? Is it you?"

"P-president Sh-h-h-h-hinra, sir, I-I-I-I-I ..."

_"What ..."_ More fury erupts into the word than Rufus wants, so he pauses a moment to collect himself and tries again. "What is it going to take to get that airship completed? I _need_ it."

He's pressed against the engineer, holding the man against the wall with his own body, so he feels the tremor of pure terror go through him. Rufus rests his lips against the engineer's ear and whispers, "I don't know if you understand just how much I _need_ that airship."

"Y-y-yes, sir."

Still whispering, Rufus asks, "When will it be done?"

There's a long pause, broken only by the engineer's harsh breathing, and then the man says, "... a week?"

Rufus grabs his hair and slams his forehead into the wall. "A week is too long. One more try."

"Tomorrow! T-tomorrow it will be ready!"

Taking a step back, Rufus puts away his knife and then pulls the engineer away from the wall and straightens out the man's clothes, brushing out the wrinkles that he just created. "I like tomorrow," he says, as the engineer stares at him like an animal. "That's a good answer. Make tomorrow happen."

"Yes, sir!"

Rufus sticks around to see what kind of alteration in behavior his little talk with the chief engineer produces, and within fifteen minutes about a hundred extra people have erupted out of the buildings around the airstrip and converged on the _Highwind._ They swarm up the airship's ladders, and bring in more cranes to lift equipment up onto the deck.

"Should have done this sooner," Rufus muses to himself. He doesn't think (doesn't _think)_ that the lengthy delays were deliberate, just an understandable incomprehension of the urgency of the company's need for the airship. Well, now they comprehend it. He calls for a car and heads back to the Junon condo for the night.

* * *

From Junon, Rufus can access the Tower mainframe directly; the computer in the condo is somewhat outdated (it's the same one he used when he lived there, five years ago), but it handles the uplink without a problem. In this way, Rufus is able to review directly the information that Reeve has been summarizing for him.

He doesn't mean to spend all night watching videos from the robot. After reading Reeve's latest update, Rufus decides to check out some of the footage that the report references, thinking that he'll just review the highlights and then move on to something else (like the quarterly budget). Then he should get to sleep and try to reset his internal clock. It's just that when he's done with the clips, he wants to know what happened just before and after the clips Reeve selected, and then he discovers another folder full of files, and before he knows it the clock is chiming 5 AM and he still hasn't gotten to bed.

There's a definite voyeurism in it; Strife and his companions have zero idea that they are being observed or recorded, and Rufus has never before gotten such an extended example of how people behave when they are not in the presence of one or more Shinras. They're scruffy. They live out of tents and, when in town, they stay in the cheapest hotels; at one point Rufus sees _ants_ along the baseboard of the room where the robot is stashed. None of them seems to own a suit (he supposes it would be impractical, what with all the fights with wildlife they have). It's unbelievable to Rufus how much magic the group uses - they break out the materia forty times a day - and watching their facility with magic almost makes him want to start carrying some of his own. Almost.

Within three hours he can see some of what made Reeve say the things he has about Cloud Strife. There are times - here and there, very fleeting - when the man is visibly not at home in his own skin. It's rare that it shows, but when it does it's quite jarring. It's surprising that nobody around him says anything about it, but when Rufus reviews the most recent upload he notes that Cid Highwind has joined Strife's group, and Highwind keeps giving Strife odd looks. No doubt he's seeing the same thing Rufus and Reeve are seeing. It would be hard to pin down exactly what's wrong, but it's undeniable that something is wrong.

But the most interesting thing of all, and what keeps Rufus from getting to bed until almost dawn, is the recording of a conversation that happened just last evening between the cat creature and the Ancient. Rufus thought that Red XIII would leave at Cosmo Canyon but that didn't happen; he's been kind of wondering why not, but hasn't had the time or inclination to really look into Reeve's reports for the answer to that.

The conversation occurs after dark, when everyone else is apparently asleep around a low-banked campfire, but the Cetra remains awake staring into the coals. Red XIII, also awake, opens the conversation by apologizing for what happened in Hojo's lab (Rufus has watched the security footage and is still pretty weirded-out that Hojo actually tried to get them to have sex), and the cat uses Gainsborough's reassurance that no apologies are needed as a segue. "He said he wanted to breed us because my people are long-lived," says Red XIII, "and yours can find the Promised Land."

"Yes," she replies without much emotion.

"I've often wondered about the Promised Land. Is it real?" The cat pauses. "Professor Hojo didn't seem to think so."

So Gainsborough starts to talk. According to her the Promised Land _is_ real, but she is more unclear on whether or not it is a physical location. She talks about what her mother told her (both before _and_ after the woman died, which sends a chill over Rufus when he realizes what she's saying), that the fate of the Cetra is a life of hardship and self-sacrifice, striving always toward the Promised Land. At times she seems to be saying that the Promised Land is reached only at death, and in a way she implies that it _is_ death itself. At another point she says, "I think that each of us has our own Promised Land. So there's not just one, but many." One thing she knows is that, as a Cetra, she should be able to speak with the planet and unlock it, and she's not quite sure how to do those things.

"I've been hearing the planet more often since we left Midgar," she tells Red XIII near the end of the recording. "Bugenhagen was right. It's in pain, and screaming."

"Grandpa is wise," says the cat, and Gainsborough reaches out with a smile and gives his ruff a scratch, exactly like she might if he were a guard hound.

"Yes, he is," she says. "Once we've caught up with Sephiroth, we'll have to do something about the Shinra. I'd like to talk to Rufus Shinra someday."

"Why?" Rufus asks the screen, but the Ancient in the video doesn't elaborate. Before long the conversation is over, and she and Red XIII go to sleep and the recording ends.

The video leaves Rufus with more questions than answers, but it does leave him thoughtful. Chasing the Promised Land has seemed so ridiculous to Rufus, since the first moment he heard about it, that he could barely say it out loud without rolling his eyes, but he is beginning to reconsider that position. Rufus's father thought that the Promised Land is a real place, one where Mako is so abundant that it flows out of the ground like water when an aquifer is struck. Gainsborough never speaks of it that way, which makes Rufus wonder how the old man thought the Ancient could lead the way to this mythical locale if she herself doesn't think it is a single physical location.

But, while she seems confused on what the Promised Land is, exactly, she seems certain that it is, at a minimum, not a myth. And everyone agrees that Sephiroth believes it is a real place that can be seized, and Sephiroth is part-Ancient, in a roundabout way, so he should probably have a good idea about it. If everyone from Sephiroth to Tseng thinks that the Promised Land exists, then maybe it does, and maybe Rufus should stop dismissing it out of hand. Maybe he should start making plans for the company to appropriate it.

What if there _is_ such a place, where Mako just gushes from the ground? On land, where a reactor can be built cheaply, and not like those underwater Mako springs that are so expensive to exploit and which are so stingy with their riches. It might be worthwhile to look into the possibility.

With that thought, Rufus finally drags himself into the bedroom to catch two hours of sleep. He hasn't even glanced at the quarterly budget all night, but somehow he can't bring himself to regret that.

* * *

The airship is not done by tomorrow. Rufus is inclined to cut the crew some slack, but only because Heidegger has arrived and he seems more than willing to be the bad guy in this matter. Rufus chews Heidegger out about the delays - in private - and then watches the man take it out on his own subordinates, allowing Rufus to pretend the abuse isn't his fault and that he didn't just pull a knife on the chief engineer himself yesterday.

It's nothing that Rufus didn't expect, really. One can kick a project into high gear by ordering round-the-clock work, but it's hard to make people actually work faster without degrading quality and there is a limit to the number of competent individuals who can work on an airship (at the same time, and in total). The technicians pull longer shifts and bring in some more personnel, but this only moves up the schedule, it doesn't make the retrofit magically complete overnight.

The chief engineer, carrying that terrified-yet-resigned look of someone who fully expects to have his head blown off, _promises_ that it will be done the following day. Rufus leaves in the middle of the fracas that Heidegger starts after that pronouncement, and calls Tseng.

"I'm still on Wutai time and I think it's midnight there," he tells Tseng. "So tell me something good that will wake me up."

"We've located the Keystone," says Tseng, which Rufus must agree is _very_ good. "Dio has it. He's willing to give it to us but he wants to meet with you, first, sir. I was just about to call you, actually."

The Gold Saucer is on Rufus's itinerary already; Shinra is a minority stakeholder in the park. Rufus was due to return to Midgar from Wutai by crossing the western continent, hitting the Nibelheim research center and the Saucer, and according to his schedule he should be arriving at the Saucer in two days. At this point, however, Rufus can't commit to that schedule. "Find some other way to get it," he tells Tseng. "Preferably one that doesn't involve killing Dio. Pull in whatever you need to get it done."

"Yes, sir."

Rufus is still not sure why this key to the Temple of the Ancients is so crucial, and he doesn't really feel like he has the time to look into it further, but he knows it is and so _his_ people have to be the ones to get it.

He takes a helicopter back to Midgar, leaving Heidegger to harangue the retrofit into completion, and arrives before lunch. The rest of the day is spent handling some of the backlog of work that couldn't be brought to him, and then reviewing that budget. His internal clock is still not fixed so despite the lack of sleep the night before he's not tired on schedule, but he has access to the bourbon again so that's not a problem.

The following morning Reeve is waiting for him in his office when he gets there, and has great news: Tseng has the Keystone. It actually sounds like quite a coup for Tseng and Reeve, a complicated little bit of subterfuge involving Cloud Strife, a sabotaged tram at the Gold Saucer, and a verbal nudge to get the Cetra to take Strife out of his hotel room and leave the Keystone available for pilfering. Dio is not happy that the Turks pulled an operation at the Saucer without advance notice, but Rufus is not very concerned about that.

"We had to play the hostages," Reeve says. "I feel kind of bad about that."

"Don't," Rufus tells him. "That's what hostages are for." The hostages are currently on Forty-Six in the low-security facility, the one that's more like a hotel than a prison; Reeve invites Rufus to meet them, but Rufus declines.

Later that same morning Heidegger calls with more great news: the airship is on a shakedown flight, and if everything checks out it should be ready for use by nightfall. Rufus tells him to coordinate with Tseng and put the airship at the Turks' disposal.

Finally, finally, everything is coming together.

* * *

It takes less than two full days for everything to fall, catastrophically, back apart.

Elena returns to Midgar and the airship drops her off on the Tower roof, and then she comes down into the President's office where Rufus and Reeve are waiting for her. Rufus has three glasses of whiskey in him by the time she arrives, but the soft blanket of intoxication doesn't protect him from the stab of pain when he sees how pale she is, how red her eyes are. What she told him over the phone isn't a mistake, then. It's real.

"What happened?" he asks, and his voice is barely above a whisper.

Her voice is steady as she starts her report. Things went according to plan at first. She and Tseng arrived at the Temple, were dropped off by the _Highwind_ and opened the Temple with the Keystone, then spent a day exploring. They met with some resistance from the wildlife but none from any intelligent source, and eventually located an interior hallway covered in murals.

Tseng knew immediately that the murals were the key to everything and they spent several hours documenting them; at this point in her report Elena hands over her PHS, which still contains pictures of the murals. Rufus pages through them, numb, as she continues.

"The Director instructed me to return to the _Highwind_ and contact you, President Shinra," Elena says. But there is no PHS reception near the Temple, so the airship pulled back toward Fort Condor. That was when Elena called Rufus the first time, to report in on the Turks' progress in the Temple. Rufus remembers it; he was in the middle of a meeting with Scarlet at the time, and was more than happy to take a call from a Turk to obtain a brief break from Scarlet's verbal orgasm over the progress of a robotic weapon she's developing.

Scarlet is now the last thing on his mind.

Reeve takes over the narrative.

Strife's group encountered Tseng in the Temple entryway. He was bleeding to death. Reeve's robot was not with the group that entered the Temple due to his being outed as a spy a couple days ago, and so Reeve was not at that point aware of Tseng's condition. Strife and his party took the Keystone from Tseng and entered the Temple. Reeve is unclear on their actions from that point until they called on the entire group to discuss the problem of the Temple.

"The Temple itself was the Black Materia," says Reeve, and Rufus must interrupt him.

"What's _Black Materia?"_ he asks, and then he adds, "If you tell me it's materia that's black, you're going to eat a bullet."

Reeve's voice turns cautious. "The Black Materia contains the ultimate destructive magic. The spell is called Meteor, and from what I understand it seems to be a something of a cross between an evocation and a summoning." He then fills in the gaps, describing the thought process that led to Strife deciding to obtain the Black Materia for himself. The Temple could be transmuted back into the Black Materia by manipulating a mechanism in the Temple interior; however, this would kill anyone making the attempt, as the Temple collapsed back into a piece of materia and crushed the person inside it. It was determined that the people Hojo used in his attempt to re-create Sephiroth are aligned with Sephiroth, and that the General could use one of these individuals to retrieve the Black Materia. Consequently, Strife felt he had to obtain the materia first in order to prevent this from occurring.

So they used the Cait Sith toy to collapse the Temple. "With Tseng inside," says Rufus. He closes Elena's PHS and gives it back to her; he's drunk enough that he thinks the pain stabbing through his chest should be muted, but it isn't, and he can't feel anything else.

"Sir," says Reeve, and his voice is earnest. "I didn't see Tseng when I guided Cait into the Temple. He must have gotten out."

"We conducted a thorough search before I called you the second time, President Shinra," says Elena grimly. "I left three squads on the island to continue searching, but ..."

Reeve interrupts to insist that Tseng must have gotten out, to which Elena counters that if he did then something probably ate him - her voice catches - because she sure as hell didn't extract him from the island.

_"Enough!"_ Rufus slams his hand down on his desk, and then, because he _hurts_ and because he's drunk he sweeps one of the monitors off his desk and throws it forcefully to the floor. He can barely breathe around that knife-feeling in his chest; he kicks another monitor, demolishes it in a spray of sparks and plastic fragments. "You fucking killed him, Reeve!"

Reeve knows what Shinras are like when they become drunk and emotional, and he knows how to finesse his way out of the danger zone. He keeps his voice calm and measured, and sincere. He takes responsibility without taking the blame. He says, "I didn't see him," and "I'm sure he wasn't in the Temple, sir, I'm _positive,"_ and "I'm so sorry," and "I should have found some way to do things differently." When Rufus stops breaking things and starts running a hand through his hair while staring bleakly at the floor, and the danger of violence seems past, Reeve approaches the President and lays a gentle hand on his shoulder. "I would have saved him if I'd known, but I didn't see him at all."

"How did this happen?" asks Rufus, but it's more like a plea now than a question. "How could this happen?"

"We all underestimated Sephiroth," says Reeve. But he's not going to underestimate Rufus, which means that this opportunity to separate Rufus from his key minion is one Reeve can't pass up. He just wishes Rufus didn't seem so ... broken up about it, like he genuinely cares about Tseng as an individual, and is upset to hear about the Turk being dead on a personal level rather than a merely professional one. It's making Reeve feel guilty and Reeve really doesn't want to feel guilty about this.

He doesn't want to, but the guilt creeps in anyway. He isn't going to let that stop him. Reeve has been on the Shinra payroll a long time, and ignoring guilt is in his job description. Nevertheless, the fact that Rufus looks like he might start crying any moment now alters the story that Reeve tells; he emphasizes the probability that Tseng successfully escaped the Temple not just to reduce his own culpability, but also in a twisted kind of attempt at comforting Rufus. _He has to be alive,_ is the unspoken message, even while he disavows all knowledge of the man's fate, and even while glossing the improbability of Tseng being wounded but alive in the jungle.

Eventually Rufus goes to stand at the window with another glass of golden whiskey, and Reeve realizes that the President is no longer listening. He asks to be excused, and Rufus waves, so Reeve leaves.

Elena is about to follow him when Rufus asks her to remain. She walks up to the window beside him, and she says, "What can I do for you, sir?"

"Just stay here." The words are a little slurred; Rufus is very drunk now. He doesn't really know Elena, but that doesn't matter. That stabbed-in-the-chest feeling is dulling into a terrible ache, and Rufus doesn't want to be alone with it. He does not say any of that, but Elena nevertheless somehow understands, and just stands next to him in silence.

Rufus drinks his whiskey, and through the haze of booze and grief he tries to imagine a world that doesn't have Tseng in it.

He can't do it, and it's an agony to try.

He throws the glass at the floor, and shatters it into a thousand pieces.

* * *

Rufus gets the rest of the story, such as it is, the next day from the report that Reeve files; he has to force himself to read it, and he's relieved that there is little mention of Tseng.

Reeve includes a preliminary analysis of the murals that Tseng discovered, combining the Turks' information with what Gainsborough has said, and it seems that Rufus's understanding of the relationship between the Promised Land, the _ultimate destructive magic_ and the Temple was mistaken. Sephiroth doesn't need the Black Materia in order to find the Promised Land, but rather the reverse is true: he needs the Promised Land in order to cast Meteor. The spell requires a lot of power, more than any one person can provide. Sephiroth plans to use the energy inherent in Mako to fuel the spell, and the Promised Land should have an abundance of Mako for him to use.

Sephiroth already has the Black Materia in his possession, on account of Strife just handing it over to him. Gainsborough has left Strife's party and nobody can say why. Strife seems sure that Sephiroth is heading north, and is either in or has passed through Bone Village, and is in pursuit. Rufus notices that there is a sharp disconnect between what Reeve relates that Strife _says_ versus what Strife actually _does,_ but he is too tired and hung over to really think about it.

Tseng is gone. That's what his mind keeps going back to. Tseng is _gone,_ and the place behind Rufus, in the shadows, where Tseng should be, is now occupied by emptiness. Rufus puts hand to his chest as the ache returns. He remembers Tseng's body behind him, pressed against him, demonstrating to him how to hold a rifle. He remembers the feel of Tseng's breath against his ear.

He remembers the taste of Tseng's mouth.

He sets down the report and pushes it aside; he has the most salient point, which is that Sephiroth intends an action that will, if successful, probably destroy the world. This puts a new urgency on Rufus's desire to apprehend the General. It's not just about revenge anymore; this has become bigger than just Rufus's need to take down his father's killer (Tseng's killer) or eliminate a threat to himself and his company.

Rufus reaches for his desk phone, and then pauses. Who is he going to call, to put onto this? Reno is the next in line to command the Turks, but ...

More or less by themselves, his fingers dial in Tseng's number.

It goes to voicemail. The greeting on Tseng's voicemail is straightforward and direct. He doesn't introduce himself. _"I apologize that I am not available. Please leave a detailed message and I will return your call at my earliest opportunity."_

For a minute or so, Rufus can't breathe.

Then, because there are no other options, he punches in the number to Reno's PHS.

That call goes to voicemail, too. Rufus checks the time, and realizes he doesn't know where Reno is right now; it could very well be the middle of the night, wherever he is. Rufus leaves a message, telling Reno to call him back immediately. Then he pulls up a video that Reeve has marked as a key conversation in Strife's group to distract himself. It took place in the lobby of the Gold Saucer hotel just before Tseng acquired the Keystone from them and before Reeve was revealed as a spy. Reeve prompted Strife for an explanation of his actions and motives, and it quickly turned into a discussion of the Promised Land.

"You don't _know_ where the Promised Land of the Ancients is," says Gainsborough on the video. "You search and travel until you feel it. Like you just know, _This is the Promised Land."_

Strife says, "Aerith, can you feel it, too?"

"I think so."

"So Sephiroth is traveling the world," says Lockhart, "because he's searching for the Promised Land?" And they all agree that he is.

There's much more in the video but nothing as interesting as that exchange. Finding Sephiroth ... finding the Promised Land ... it seems as though they are the same thing.

* * *

It takes Reno more than a week to call Rufus back.

"Where the fuck have you been?" demands Rufus, when Reno finally does check in. He's furious, but more than half of his anger is fueled by the fact that ten minutes ago he had nearly convinced himself that Sephiroth had killed the rest of his Turks.

"On vacation, yo," is Reno's response. He is quiet while Rufus's temper detonates on that statement, and then calmly explains that he hadn't had a vacation for most of a year and it was time. Rude and Elena came with him, which is why they weren't answering their phones either, and Heidegger cleared it so it's not like they went AWOL or anything. He is bemused that Rufus didn't already know.

Rufus had, once again, completely forgotten that the Turks report to Heidegger and not directly to himself, but that doesn't mollify him. "You just had to take your vacation _now?"_ Rufus asks, incredulous. "You couldn't wait until, I don't know, the world isn't in danger of _ending?"_

"If I wait 'til there's no emergency, I'll never take it, yo. There's always an emergency of one type or another goin' on." Rufus hears Reno take a drag off a cigarette through the line, and then the Turk says, "'Sides, if the world is gonna end, I better take my time off now, yeah? 'Cause there won't be any time later."

Rufus sees white for an instant, grabs the stapler off his desk and flings it; it bounces off the bulletproof glass of the window and skitters across the floor. Then he is able to pause, take a breath, and remind himself that Reno knows how to do his fucking job and doesn't need to be micromanaged. He picks the receiver back up and says, "I see."

"Chill, sir. Shit's under control, yeah?" Reno has been talking with Reeve, and he knows where Sephiroth is and where Strife is. Matter of fact, the Turks ran into Strife in Wutai, and Reno thinks it's a good thing he was on vacation because Scarlet found out where Strife was, too, and called Reno to order him to take Strife's group out. "But I was on vacation, yo." Sephiroth, meanwhile, is heading north from Bone Village, through the Sleeping Forest. For a non-Cetra to pass through the Forest some kind of magic is required, and Reno is inclined to let Strife figure out what that magic is and how to use it. "Then we'll just come in behind 'em." Reno takes another drag, and then says, "Y'know, I got this feelin' that Sephiroth is makin' himself real easy to follow. He's always leavin' rumors, seems like he's not even tryin' t'keep a low profile."

"Everyone knows what he looks like," says Rufus. "I doubt he could if he wanted to."

"Maybe."

The last bit of information Reno has is that Don Corneo had a terrible accident on Da Chao Mountain and fell to his death. Rufus had no idea that there was a hit out on Corneo; it seems that the Don let the plan to drop the Sector Seven plate slip to AVALANCHE, and Rufus's father was not amused. Although Rufus still thinks the plate thing was an immense mistake, he has to agree that leaks of confidential company information must be plugged and he's happy to learn that Reno has dealt with this one.

"Thought you were on vacation," says Rufus sourly.

"Doesn't mean I can't kill people for fun, yeah?"

Most of Rufus's anger is gone now, but he warns Reno not to fall out of touch that way again. "Sure thing, Boss," says Reno, but his tone is flippant and Rufus is not at all convinced the Turk will obey him.

* * *

Hojo shows up in Rufus's office. He doesn't make an appointment, but Rufus lets it go because he picks a good time for it, when Rufus isn't busy with anything urgent, and because he keeps his tone respectful. "President Shinra," he says to Rufus, "I came by to inquire how my experiment is coming along."

Rufus has to ask what the hell the man means, and Hojo clarifies that he's talking about Sephiroth. Rufus turns away from his computer and thinks about it, and then proposes an exchange. Hojo will tell him exactly why he cares, and Rufus will share what's going on with the General.

Although Rufus expects some resistance to this suggestion, Hojo needs very little prompting to start talking about his work. At first it's the same stuff Rufus already knows from the Jenova Project reports - details of Sephiroth's ... creation, a recap of how Sephiroth was the successful prong of the SOLDIER project - but then he says something very remarkable that Rufus hadn't known. "Ultimately it was a good thing that Jenova turned out to not be an Ancient at all, because otherwise I think we wouldn't have met with nearly as much success."

"Wait," Rufus stops him. "I thought Jenova was identified as a Cetra."

"Oho, _Gast_ certainly thought that." Hojo giggles, actually _giggles._ "But he didn't have half my genius. You never saw the final analysis? No, no, Jenova is no Cetra. She is something _much_ more fascinating, and much more powerful! An organism like no other on this planet!"

Interesting, but Rufus's mind leaps immediately to the problem at hand. "What are you saying? That Sephiroth is not an Ancient?"

"Certainly not. The Ancients are nearly extinct for a reason."

"Then how could he find the Promised Land?"

Hojo's expression twists into one of distaste. "The Promised Land doesn't exist."

That's not the reaction Rufus expected. He says, "I thought you were going to help my father find it."

"Well," says Hojo, "we would have found _something._ The Cetra certainly had a feel for something. But, the Promised Land? A land of supreme happiness for everyone?" He scoffs. "I'm sure the Ancients would have shown us to nothing more amazing than a field of flowers, or some such." He sounds disgusted by the very idea.

Rufus withholds his opinion on that; he's almost certain by this point that the Promised Land is real and exists somewhere, but he doesn't have to justify that belief to an employee, and he doesn't feel like getting into an argument over it. Instead he says, "So, if not the Promised Land, what could Sephiroth be after?"

"I have no idea. Why don't you let me know what he's been up to, and maybe I'll come up with a hypothesis for you."

Why not? Rufus gives Hojo a brief recap of Sephiroth's recent movements, but he leaves out the bit about the Temple of the Ancients and Meteor because he doesn't see that Hojo has a need to know that. "He's currently on the northern continent trying to get through the Sleeping Forest."

"Hmmm," says Hojo. "You know what's on the other side of the Sleeping Forest, don't you?"

"I'm afraid not."

Hojo gives a thin smile. "Nobody does, for certain, but a few researchers have made it through and back and claimed it was a Cetra city! Can you imagine that? A settlement by the Cetra that lasted more than a couple of weeks? If Sephiroth makes it there, hmmm. I wonder what he'll find?" Hojo muses to himself, "Maybe some of the lore of the Ancients."

"But that can't be the Promised Land," says Rufus. Not at the location of a Cetra city.

"Of course not, since the Promised Land doesn't exist at all."

"Oh," says Rufus, who had briefly forgotten Hojo's skepticism on that point. "Of course not."

They discuss a few more things: Hojo's theories about the Cetra, his direct observations of Gainsborough, more of his derisive thoughts on what the so-called Promised Land really is (a Mako spring, a cemetery, more dismissive comments about flowers). By the time Hojo leaves Rufus has the best picture of this whole business that he's had to date, and he's grateful the professor stopped by. As he's turning to go, Hojo says, "Do keep me informed of anything Sephiroth might find, would you? I would be deeply appreciative."

"Of course," says Rufus.

* * *

Rufus can't stop thinking about Tseng.

Reno finally pries some info out of Scarlet: she's working on a weapons platform that uses Huge Materia alone as an energy source. The Mako Cannon operates on a combination of Huge Materia and direct Mako power from the Junon reactor; Scarlet wants a power source that removes the Mako from the equation and make the materia the sole source of energy. "I don't understand the details," says Reno, "but it sounds good." Rufus must agree that it would be a true innovation. The Mako Cannon is easily Shinra's most powerful weapon, but it's tied to the reactor; a weapon of even half the Cannon's power, but mobile, would be terrifying.

"Okay," Rufus says, trying not to think about how Reno got Scarlet so talkative. "So why all the secrecy?" Reno says that Rufus's father forbade Scarlet from wasting her time on what he thought was a fool's errand, a weapon too expensive to develop and build given that there is no enemy in the world that requires it. Rufus has not forbidden Scarlet anything, and she intends to present a completed weapon to him as a _fait accompli,_ banking on forgiveness being easier to obtain than permission.

It's actually kind of an interesting strategy to Rufus, and he decides to let her keep at it without letting her know that he's aware of it so long as she sticks within her existing black-box budget. There's a certain, almost evolutionary appeal to it; the project will succeed on its own or it will die, without any outside interference.

It makes him wish, painfully, that Tseng were here, to have an opinion on it and maybe share it. Rufus never had to ask Tseng for advice; Tseng just gave it when it was appropriate, or withheld it when it wasn't. How can Rufus ever again be certain - _certain_ \- that he's doing the right thing, without Tseng?

A couple of days later, Gainsborough is dead. Reeve delivers the news with a voice full of real regret; it seems to Rufus that he became somewhat fond of the Ancient in their brief period of long-distance association. Sephiroth is responsible, of course, first attempting to force Strife to kill Gainsborough, and when that failed he did the deed himself. If, as Hojo claims, Sephiroth has no link to the Cetra, this means that the Ancients are, finally, completely extinct.

Rufus wonders what Gainsborough wanted to say to him; he'll never know now. Hopefully it wasn't important. But what his mind keeps going over, and over and over, is what Tseng would have thought of this. Would he be upset? Tseng had a long and complicated history with the Ancient; was he fond of her, too? Would he grieve?

For the rest of the day Rufus is somewhat sad about Gainsborough's death, because Tseng can't be.

The rest of the information Reeve provides is alarming, and it relates to Cloud Strife. Apparently the influence Sephiroth has over Strife is either increasing, or greater than anyone originally believed. In any case, after Gainsborough's death he actually asked his companions to stay with him as a kind of group chaperone project, to prevent him from doing any more stupid things like handing dangerous materia over to Sephiroth or attempting to kill his friends. Rufus had been reasonably content to let Strife do all the hard work and simply capitalize on the information the wannabe-SOLDIER uncovered, but it looks like that is no longer a safe strategy (and probably never was one).

So now they have to find the Promised Land themselves, the hard way, without being able to rely on tracking a Cetra who is also looking for it. According to Reeve, Sephiroth mentioned something about the northern snow fields; Rufus tells Reeve to call Reno with everything he's learned, and get the Turks on it, ahead of Strife this time.

Then, when Reeve is gone and Rufus is alone in his office, he finds himself staring at his phone; almost against his will, he picks it up and dials.

_"I apologize that I am not available. Please leave a detailed message and I will return your call at my earliest opportunity."_

Rufus leaves a message, although it is not detailed. "I miss you."

* * *

It's Elena who finds it.

She calls in, her voice excited, the call relayed - with difficulty - through Icicle Inn and Bone Village. "There's a huge crater up here." It's surrounded by strong winds and storms, and Mako bursts out of it in geysers.

Rufus orders her to bring the airship back to the Tower to collect him. He wants to see it himself. Then, while he waits for the _Highwind_ to arrive, he tries to return to what he'd been doing before the call - reviewing world-wide Mako rates, determining which should be raised and which lowered to maximize profit, which involves a lot of charting and calculus - but the figures can't hold his attention. Within five minutes he's out of his seat, pacing restlessly. _The Promised Land._

The only thing that moves faster than bad news in the Shinra Tower is a juicy rumor, and within an hour Scarlet is in Rufus's office. She is full of effusive praise for the discovery, and talks about what a turning-point this will be for the company. The Shinra Electric Power Company will never be the same. History, she says, will remember Rufus's name first, over his father's. It doesn't fool Rufus - he knows what she's after - but he nevertheless finds himself smiling behind his hand as she goes on and on about what a brilliant and visionary President he is. He's already in a good mood, and Scarlet is pushing him into an excellent one.

"Yes, you may come along," says Rufus, once he feels like his ego has had its fill. "The airship should be here by nightfall and we'll be departing then." Scarlet leaves happy.

Heidegger is also coming, just because he has to as the head of the military that runs the airship, and Reno adds himself and Rude to the manifest without telling anyone ahead of time. Rude just kind of shows up in Rufus's office as the _Highwind_ is tacking in toward the Tower, comes to stand at the window as the President watches the airship drift majestically through the clouds of steam off the Sector Two reactor, and when the airship docks he walks next to Rufus up to the roof and gets on board, without saying a single word to anyone about why he's there.

Rufus doesn't know Reno is going to accompany him, and won't until later.

At the last minute Rufus sends for Hojo. The Professor's skepticism about the Promised Land irked him, although he's not sure why. It's childish, but Rufus sort of wants to rub the man's face in it. _The Promised Land._

If only Tseng were here to see it.

Elena debarks before the _Highwind_ casts off, but before she does she meets with Rufus in the ship's conference room for twenty minutes, telling him everything about how she found it and what it's like. It wasn't hard to find, exactly, according to Elena, but she's nevertheless not surprised that nobody got there before because it is virtually unreachable without an airship. "There's a glacier between Icicle Inn and the crater, sir," she tells him. "People die on it all the time." She was able to fly over the glacier with ease, but the crater creates its own weather and the weather is terrible, probably impenetrable to a smaller aircraft. "The winds would slap a chopper down. Take it slow going through them, sir."

As for the crater itself ... her eyes glitter a little when she reiterates the geysers of Mako. Rufus wants to be sure that wasn't an exaggeration, and she tells him that one of them almost hit the airship half a kilometer up.

"That's a lot of Mako," he says.

"Yes, sir."

At the end of the meeting she gets off the ship, and then the crew lift the airship away from the Tower and come around Midgar in a wide arc, turning northward.

It will be a long flight, and Rufus intends to get some sleep on the way there, but he has time yet before he'll be tired. He goes out onto the deck, and stands there with the wind whipping the tails of his coat against his legs; the ship's turn gives him a panoramic view of the Tower and then a long and loving review of the city. Midgar is, in its way, beautiful, the lights like gems on black velvet, the reactors gleaming with pure emerald green in their throats.

There is darkness where Sector Seven used to be, and large sections in Sector Six where construction of the plate is not yet complete; the Sector One reactor is still offline, and the Sector Five reactor is at half power. The flaws stir something inside Rufus, not for the first time. This is _his_ city now, in the very literal sense that Shinra owns a large percentage of the real estate, and it feels like someone mauled it before handing it over to him. Midgar is damaged goods, worked over by AVALANCHE and by Rufus's father.

But the emotion that is stirred in Rufus is not anger ... something related, but different. He wants to turn the lights back on in Sector Seven. He wants a complete ring of reactors glowing against the sky. He wants his city to be symmetrical, perfected, like a formal garden grown with neon and steel.

Rude joins him on the deck. The Turk says nothing, just stands a little way down the railing, looking out over the city in the same way as the President, and Rufus does not speak to him. Rufus has no thoughts he is willing to share. Not with Rude, anyway.

Rufus pulls out his PHS, dials.

_"I apologize that I am not available. Please leave a detailed message and I will return your call at my earliest opportunity."_

"We found the Promised Land. I want to use it to heal Midgar. What do you think of that?"


	10. the Black Materia

It will take a few hours to get to the crater. Rufus finds out which of the staterooms has his luggage and goes to lay down; it's just before he turns out the light that he discovers that Reno has come along for the ride, when the Turk walks in on him.

_What are you doing here?_ Rufus has his mouth open to ask, and Reno cuts off the words by closing the door and pulling him around and up against it, and kissing him. It's such a surprise, and doesn't answer the question Rufus wants to ask, but when Rufus attempts to push Reno away the Turk grabs him by the wrists and pins him, subduing him against the door as easily as Rufus had subdued the engineer back in Junon.

Reno pushes his pelvis against Rufus's hip, and Rufus can feel the Turk's hard erection; between that and Reno's tongue in his mouth and the sudden entrapment, the message is delivered that Rufus is about to be fucked. Then Reno shifts his kiss down to Rufus's throat, using his teeth and tongue on the junction of Rufus's shoulder, and gives Rufus the opportunity to voice an objection, if he wants to.

Instead he moans, and says, "Do it," and Reno growls. This has lasted all of twenty seconds so far and Rufus is already hard; it's been more than a week since Rufus last masturbated, and it feels like an age since Wutai. He'd already shed his coats and vest and tie before Reno came in, but he's nevertheless hot, feels like he's wearing far too much.

Maybe Reno feels the same way, because he releases Rufus's wrists and starts to strip off his shirt; Rufus uses the freedom to push at Reno's jacket. Despite the interference Reno gets Rufus's shirt off and his pants half-off him, too, and then moves him over to the stateroom bed to strip him the rest of the way. This also makes it easier for Rufus to get Reno's clothes off him, and some of Reno's aggression eases for a few moments when Rufus gets a hand on the Turk's cock and his mouth on one of Reno's nipples.

"Damn," Reno whispers, and he lays a hand over Rufus's, slowing the strokes. His other hand goes through Rufus's hair. "I want you so bad."

"Do it," says Rufus again, wetly, giving Reno's nipple a touch of his teeth.

No further urging is required; Reno pushes Rufus over, finds his jacket to retrieve the condoms and lubricant he brought, and then violently fucks the President on his knees. Rufus comes practically the second Reno is inside him, and Reno fucks him straight through it which makes it almost too intense, but he can't pull away and Reno wraps a hand around his throat to stop him when his body tries.

"No, you don't," says Reno, voice rough, and he bites the back of Rufus's neck for emphasis.

So Rufus stays where he is, a jolt of almost unbearable pleasure jabbing through him with each of Reno's thrusts, and he groans and gasps, and sucks on Reno's fingers when they're pushed into his mouth. The airship sways beneath them, and Rufus closes his eyes.

Reno has much more stamina than Rufus, and by the time he comes as well Rufus is half-aroused again. The stateroom has a small shower attached; it's not sized to be used by more than one person, but Reno somehow makes it work. Rufus comes again into Reno's hand with warm water streaming over them both, biting the Turk's shoulder and crying out.

Afterward, when they've both cleaned off and Rufus is laying drowsy and warm on the stateroom bed, he asks what he's been wanting to know all along. "Why are you here?"

Reno, sitting beside him, does not answer; instead he asks, "You really think this thing'll be the Promised Land, sir?"

"I hope so."

"You should prob'ly get some sleep then, yeah?" Reno runs a hand over Rufus's face, stands up, gets dressed. Rufus says nothing more as the Turk straightens out his clothes, and then leaves.

* * *

The visit to the Promised Land is an unmitigated disaster. A _complete_ disaster, in the sense that nothing goes quite right, and everything that could go wrong does.

The locale itself is beautiful, in a violent and primal kind of way. _Geysers of Mako_ doesn't actually do the place justice; not only was Elena not exaggerating, if anything she was underselling it. There are geysers of Mako all right ... and a cyclone of Mako, and a caldera full of churning Mako, and caverns with walls where the Mako has crystallized into solid sheets of materia. Curtains of light dance in the sky. It's breathtaking.

The crew get the airship as close as they can without spraying the deck in Mako and tether it so that people can climb down to the rocky ground. Heidegger then deploys the army and the two SOLDIER squads they brought, ordering everyone to stay in radio contact and call in _immediately_ when Sephiroth is sighted. His plan is to bring the _Highwind's_ artillery to bear wherever Sephiroth turns up, which is really the only hope anyone has to keep the General away from the wealth of Mako.

Rufus is thinking, how to secure this, how to keep Sephiroth _away_ from this, but also, how to exploit this. His father wanted to build a new city on the Promised Land; that's obviously ridiculous, and was ridiculous even before Rufus saw what kind of Gaiaforsaken landscape surrounds the site. Kilometers of ice and snow in every direction, until one hits the sea. Midgar is perfectly located at a crossroads of commerce. This place? It's in the middle of fucking _nowhere._

To get all this Mako to market ... he'll have to get some engineers up here, do feasibility studies. Maybe a pumping station, with tankers, or an inter-continental pipeline. He's not really sure; engineering isn't his field.

That can be worked out later, assuming they can keep Sephiroth off it.

"Sir," Heidegger tells Rufus when the young President climbs down the ladder to the ground, "it would be safer if you stayed on the airship."

"I know," Rufus replies, but he didn't come all this way to see the Promised Land only to remain on board the whole time. He hops off the last rung and goes to check out the place.

Scarlet accompanies him even though he doesn't ask her to, and Hojo unexpectedly follows him as well. Rufus finds a way into the main cavern, and is just absolutely stunned by the beauty of it. The green glow of the Mako shines through the translucent barrier of materia, creating an ethereal lace of dancing shadows and light.

"It's all materia!" says Scarlet after a moment's inspection. "The whole wall!"

Vast quantities of Mako on the outside, enormous reserves of (natural!) materia on the inside. Rufus says, reverent, "This truly is the Promised Land."

It's then that Hojo feels a need to again express his pessimism about the very existence of the Promised Land. While standing in the middle of it, while actually _looking_ at this gorgeous cascade of frozen Mako. Rufus gives what he hopes is not a _completely_ contemptuous look and says, "This is everything anyone could hope the Promised Land could be," and then his irritation sort of ruins his attempt to conceal his contempt by making him add, "You know, people say you're a second-rate scientist. It's that kind of dullness that makes you sound like one."

Hojo gives a sort of matching look of near-contempt, and he might be about to say something but then the ground rumbles and everyone forgets about what they were talking about a moment ago. "The hell was that?" says Rufus when the rumbles stop.

Scarlet, at the far end of the cavern examining the materia, says, "It's coming from inside the wall," and then she backs away because there is something moving in there.

A moment later, what looks like a vast eye blinks drowsily open, then closes again.

"WEAPON," says Hojo thoughtfully. "So it really does exist."

Rufus, far less enchanted by this place now than he was five minutes ago, demands to know what Hojo is talking about, and a look of almost insufferable smugness crosses the professor's face. WEAPON, says Hojo, is something he never personally believed in; he always thought it was a myth.

Of course that explains nothing, and when Hojo says something about giant monsters created by the planet, that doesn't help much either (because it sounds insane). "But here it is," says Hojo, peering through the materia at the vast, creature-shaped shadow within. "Just as Gast stated in his report."

He's being abstruse on purpose, Rufus thinks, likely in retaliation for that second-rate-scientist crack. Rufus supposes he deserves it, but he'll be fucked before he admits that. "I never saw a report about that," he says irritably. "Where is it?"

Hojo indicates that he keeps it in his head, which is not really a surprise. Gast was Hojo's predecessor and, from what Rufus understands, in some ways Hojo's mentor. Rufus never met the man - he cut out and disappeared when Rufus was a toddler - but people talk about him even today as being far more intelligent and innovative than Hojo. There's no mystery in why Hojo might want to suppress Gast's work.

Where is Gast today? Rufus wonders. "You keep too much to yourself," he tells Hojo. "Well, it's sharing time. Tell me everything you know about this WEAPON thing, now."

Rufus expects resistance, but as before it doesn't actually take much to get Hojo into lecture mode. The term WEAPON comes from a Cetra concept, the idea that the planet itself reacts to danger by creating a self-defense mechanism, a system. At some point in the past this occurred, but the Cetra dealt with the threat themselves and WEAPON was not deployed. The system went inactive, the creatures that compose it went to sleep, but if the planet is again threatened the system can re-mobilize.

It _does_ sound quite ridiculous; it makes it sound like the planet is, in some way, a living thing and at least semi-sentient. No wonder Hojo discounted it. Rufus is inclined to discount it himself, right now, but he grants this theory the benefit of the doubt for the moment, given that there is definitely _something_ inside the wall here. "What makes you so sure this is it, then?" he asks.

"The location is right." Hojo explains that it's somewhere around here that whatever happened that caused WEAPON to come into being. If this self-defense system was created but never deployed, it should be in more or less the same spot today. "And ... there's nothing else it could be."

Rufus thinks, personally, that there is more than one possible origin for an enormous creature in the middle of an area saturated in a known mutagen, but there's no point getting into that. WEAPON is as good an explanation as any.

Scarlet approaches. "President Shinra," she says, "I don't think it's a good idea to stay here." She indicates the might-be-WEAPON shadow within the wall, which has half-opened its eye again and is drowsily regarding them.

It's eerie, and yes, Rufus doesn't really want to stick around here anymore. "Let's go back to the ship," says Rufus, and that's when things take another sharp downward turn.

Some people appear, just materialize out of nowhere. One of them turns to Rufus, and Rufus realizes with horror that it's Cloud Strife. And he has _no_ bodyguards anywhere nearby.

As casually as he can, Rufus slides a hand into his jacket and hits the emergency call button on the back of his PHS. There's no proper reception here, but the Turks should be close enough to pick it up via relay.

It will take a few minutes for anyone to respond, so it's fortunate that Strife doesn't seem inclined to murder Rufus at just this moment; he looks a bit lost, actually, and a bit like a confused child. He ignores everyone else and turns to Rufus, and says, "You might want to get out of here, while you still can. This place is going to get ... a little rough." He turns his gaze upward.

"What are you talking about?" asks Rufus, and he runs a hand nervously through his hair. One of Strife's companions - Tifa Lockhart, Rufus sees when he glances that way - is calling Strife's name, but if Strife even hears it he gives no sign.

"Just leave things to me," Strife tells Rufus. "This is where the Reunion is happening. Where everything ... begins and ends."

_What the fuck?_ Rufus feels like he's stepped into some kind of parallel universe. How did Strife even _get here?_

Someone else comes stumbling in: the third AVALANCHE member, Barret Wallace, another person Rufus doesn't really want to meet up close this way. Strife addresses him, asks for the Black Materia, and Wallace just ... passes over what must be it.

"Had a lot of pressure holding this thing," says Wallace, and Rufus abruptly realizes that this can't possibly end well. Strife already gave the Black Materia to Sephiroth once. Rufus has no idea how this bunch got it back, but giving it to Strife ... seems like a bad plan.

Later, Rufus will look back on his actions (and inactions) in these crucial few minutes, and curse himself for the cowardice he displays. But right now, in the moment, he can't bring himself to act. The Black Materia shines dully in Strife's hand, and Rufus wonders what would happen if he walked over there and took it away; then he remembers Dark Nation bleeding out on the Shinra Tower roof balcony, and he doesn't dare try.

Strife proceeds to apologize to everyone, although he doesn't say for what. Then Hojo cackles and sends the conversation further down the hole of surrealism by asking to see Strife's number. His _number._ Strife seems to know what Hojo is talking about, and says that he doesn't have one because he was deemed a failed experiment; Hojo reacts with disdain, and Strife ... kind of flies away, as though lifted by strings.

It's then that Rufus sees Rude at the entrance to the cavern; he's not very close, but just _seeing_ him there lifts a weight off Rufus's nerves. (It doesn't hurt that Strife is gone, as inexplicably as he'd arrived.) Rufus claps his hands together to get everyone's attention and regain control of this situation, and says, "What in the _fuck_ was that? Who wants to go first?"

It again takes very minimal prompting to get Hojo to give a fresh lecture. He describes (again, as though Rufus hasn't heard it before) his attempt to recreate Sephiroth, but then he drops a new detail: his _reunion_ theory. "You see," says Hojo, gazing up toward the ceiling where Strife disappeared, "even if Jenova's body is dismembered, it will eventually become one again. That's what is meant by Jenova's _reunion."_ He parceled up bits of Jenova, using Strife and others, and let them disperse, then waited for them to come back together on their own accord. "I thought the clones would begin to gather at Midgar, where the main part of Jenova was stored." But they didn't; instead, the remaining intact portion removed itself from the Shinra Tower, and relocated.

Hojo starts to laugh, and his voice hikes up a notch. "But, I _am_ a genius, and I soon figured it out. It was Sephiroth. It was all Sephiroth's doing! He is not content to diffuse his will into the Lifestream, oh no. He wants to manipulate Jenova and the clones himself!"

Rufus brushes a hand through his hair. The fucking _Lifestream?_ Really? But before he can say that - _you think the Promised Land is a fairy tale but the fucking Lifestream you believe in?_ \- Hojo continues to lay out his theory that Sephiroth is, in some fashion, using Jenova's _reunion_ trait to gather the clones to himself.

Only one conclusion can be drawn from that, but it takes a few moments for Rufus to reach it, and by the time he realizes what Hojo is describing it's too late to do or say anything.

Actually, he will realize later, the point of _too late_ was passed several minutes ago.

There is a terrific _crack,_ almost deafening in the enclosed space, and the ceiling seems to fracture. Rude is at Rufus's elbow in an instant, pulling Rufus away, out toward the cavern entrance as the walls begin to shake and the ground rumbles.

Reno appears once they are out of the cavern, on Rufus's other side, and he's breathing hard like he ran all the way from wherever he was before. "What's goin' on?"

Rude answers before Rufus has a chance. "Cave ceiling's starting to come down. We have to get the President back to the airship."

"Wait." Rufus stops, yanks his arm free of Rude. Behind them, Hojo's voice rises again. _"Did you see it? It's Sephiroth! So he is here!"_ The ground lurches; stones tumble and crack against he ground, and Reno catches Rufus when he stumbles.

"Call Heidegger," Rufus tells the Turks. "Get everyone back on board ship immediately and prepare to pull out. I'm going back."

"Sir ..." says Reno, the beginning of an objection, but Rufus cuts him off. He's thinking about Sephiroth, and the Black Materia, and the imperative to keep them apart, things he should have thought five minutes ago but didn't.

"I don't have time to argue," he says. "Just fucking _do it."_

Reno does it. He and Rude start to run up the path toward the airship, pulling out their radios as they go. Rufus turns back to the cavern.

And ... he can see immediately that there's nothing he can do. The cavern is collapsing; Strife is not in sight, and neither is Sephiroth. Stones and broken materia crash to the ground, which is heaving and splitting. Rufus stumbles, and must catch himself to keep from being thrown down.

Strife's companions are still in the middle of the cavern, staring in open-mouthed horror at the ceiling. They're going to die here if they don't escape, and although Rufus doesn't care about that exactly, he'd nevertheless like to know more about what's going on in a way that doesn't rely on Reeve's robot.

He grabs Lockhart's arm and says, "Come with me." She starts to say something, and he cuts her off, too. "Just come! Anything said now is too little, too late. We have to evacuate. I have an airship. Come with me."

They come with Rufus; they have little choice. The rest of their group is nearby and the whole crowd of them retreat to the _Highwind_ with the President; the last one grabs onto the ladder just as the ground begins to destabilize.

The _Highwind_ turns. The Mako geysers disappear, and Rufus watches, mutely, filled with a sense of terrible futility and fate, as light begins to fill the center of the crater. The _Highwind_ kicks into gear and pulls away, chased by that brilliant light. Immense creatures claw their way out of the crater, roaring.

Rufus knows a great and awful spell is being cast; too little, too late indeed. There's nothing at all to say, and, as has been the case all along, the only thing he can do is stand and watch it happen.

* * *

Much to Rufus's surprise, the world does not end immediately. In fact, for a while it looks like nothing happens at all, and he wonders if the Black Materia was some kind of dud.

By the time they reach Junon, he knows otherwise.

It appears in the sky alongside the morning sun: red, angry, wreathed in tendrils of fiery magic. It's hard to say how big it is - there's nothing for scale - but to Rufus's eyes at least it looks _huge._

"Fuck," he says, standing at the railing on the _Highwind's_ deck, watching it as it rises over the horizon.

This is his fault. All night (not sleeping, as usual) he's been thinking of all the things he could have - should have - done. All the things he could have said. All the different ways in which he could have shot Cloud Strife (and maybe even survived the attempt). It turns out that Sephiroth was right there in the cavern the whole time; if only Rufus had _looked up._ If only he'd tried to keep _Strife_ out. If only he hadn't been so intimidated by Strife's sudden appearance. If only he'd brought Reno with him into the cavern. If only. If only.

_If only Tseng had been there. He would have known what to do._

It's only mid-morning when they arrive, and people have had only a few hours to notice and start to question this new arrival in the sky. Rufus gets back to the Shinra offices without a problem, but there are already messages waiting for him - the press office wants to know what official story the papers and television stations should run - and it gets worse from there. By lunch, there is a crowd outside the building; by mid-afternoon, the army has to post some soldiers to maintain security.

Rufus offloads the problem of the press to Reeve, and the evening news will report that it is currently under investigation by Shinra scientists, but early analysis has identified it as an unusually large solar flare. It is not traveling toward the planet and is no danger to anyone.

Strife's companions are brought to the barracks; one of them, Lockhart, was injured during the escape from the crater, and Rufus authorizes her to be cared for in the infirmary. The rest are locked up, and Rufus goes to dispose of them just before dinner.

Wallace and Lockhart are really the only important ones, and Lockhart's injury gives Rufus a first-class opportunity to separate them from the rest without violence. When he enters the holding area, he is met with loud curses and demands to know _where she is, where is she motherfucker,_ and Rufus lets it go on for thirty seconds or so before responding.

"She hit her head or something," he tells them. "She's still unconscious." Then he pauses, as though the idea has just come to him, and addresses Wallace. "Would it make you feel better if you stayed with her?"

The offer takes the wind out of Wallace's anger, and he eventually admits that yes, it would, so Rufus has him taken to the infirmary.

The other three, Rufus really doesn't need. Valentine, the ex-Turk, isn't present (and Rufus has no clue where he is) which is a damned shame because Rufus really wanted to talk to him, but oh well. Yuffie Kisaragi would make a useful hostage if Rufus thought Wutai was any threat, but he doesn't, so she isn't. He has nothing against the red cat thing, and no use whatsoever for Cid Highwind.

No, Lockhart and Wallace are the only ones he needs to keep. They're all that's left of AVALANCHE, and they're also Cloud Strife's closest companions. Rufus would like to know if Strife is still alive; if he is, he'll surely try to rescue the two of them. Rufus also thinks that those two will be the most informed when it comes to Strife and Sephiroth. These others are extraneous.

Once Wallace is gone, Rufus tells them, "The rest of you may go."

"... what?" says Highwind.

Ignoring him, Rufus turns to the guard and says, "Have them escorted outside the complex," and the guard salutes. Then Rufus turns to leave.

Highwind's voice rises behind him. "Hey, Rufus, get your ass back here!"

"Go home, Highwind," Rufus tells him. "This is none of your business and never was."

He gives Wallace half an hour to reassure himself that Lockhart is being treated properly for her injuries, and then checks in on them. It's dinner time now and he invites Wallace to join him. The man angrily refuses, and Rufus shrugs.

He's almost out the door when Wallace says, "What're you playin' at, Shinra?"

"I thought you might be hungry by now," Rufus tells him. "And I thought we could talk."

"Got nuthin' to say to you," says Wallace.

So Rufus dines alone that evening. He has a lot of wine, because it's going to be essentially impossible for him to get to sleep without it. Reno comes by afterward, to accompany Rufus home, and he's visibly disappointed when he sees how drunk Rufus is but he says nothing about it.

The next day, the first analysis of Meteor crosses Rufus's desk. As Rufus expected, it's headed straight for Gaia, but the report highlights this as being very _un_ expected by the scientists. Rufus doesn't understand why and he calls the scientist who wrote up the findings to get an in-depth explanation. It turns out that things in space always move in curves, and one would expect Meteor to be in orbit around the sun, perhaps in an orbit that will intersect Gaia's at some point. But no, it's moving straight - straight - for the planet.

"That's actually good news for us, Mr. President," the scientist says. "Aiming straight at what you want to hit is a really terrible way to catch anything in orbit, because your target is gone by the time you get there, and the gravitational forces of the sun and other bodies pull you out of your intended trajectory. The spell is having to drag this thing constantly into new directions as our planet moves through space, so it's going to take a lot longer for it to reach us than it would otherwise."

Rufus kind of grasps it - if Meteor were _smart_ it would aim in front of the planet, like leading a moving target. But Meteor isn't smart, it's just unintelligent, brute-force magic. "So how long do you think we have?"

"I'm not sure, sir. A month, maybe? We'll have an estimate once we've made more observations."

The first demonstrations start in Midgar the same day; people aren't buying the "harmless solar flare" story and want real answers. Rufus tells Heidegger to have the army to break it up without killing anyone, but to arrest anyone who seems like a ringleader.

He extends another invitation to Wallace to have dinner with him that evening. This time Wallace grudgingly accepts; Lockhart is still out, and probably he's bored stupid, having nothing to do. Or maybe he's hoping to get a shot at Rufus, but he has no ammunition for the gun on his arm and Rufus brings a Turk with him (Rude, since he figures Reno is not popular with AVALANCHE at the moment) so that doesn't happen.

"I want to understand your grudge against my company," Rufus tells Wallace. It's a lie; really, it would be difficult for him to care less about this. What he needs is information about Sephiroth, and about Meteor, but he doesn't think Wallace is in a sharing mood when it comes to those subjects. Rufus has to break past this hatred that Wallace carries for him first, and he thinks this is a good way to do that.

So he eats in silence while Wallace unloads a dissertation on the subject of his hatred for Shinra. It's all framed in terms of _Shinra is killing the planet_ but what is beneath the words is simple impotent rage. Shinra is wealthy and powerful, and Wallace is neither; that's the beginning and the end of it. It's just the resentment that the powerless always have for the powerful, wrapped up in talk of the Lifestream (again with the fucking Lifestream).

Disappointing, but hardly startling. Rufus conceals his disappointment, nodding thoughtfully at the right moments to keep Wallace going. Wallace obviously expects Rufus to argue with him, and becomes suspicious halfway through the meal when the argument doesn't materialize. "Ain't you gonna say nuthin'?" he says at last.

"I believe you already know what I think," says Rufus. "So there's no point in my saying it."

"You gonna just sit there," says Wallace slowly, "an' not even tell me why you think it's _okay_ to act like money is more important than the planet's life?"

Rufus does not roll his eyes, although the temptation is very great. "I'm hardly going to change your mind. But let's say, this is your opportunity to change mine."

It's manipulative, but Rufus has no philosophical objections to being manipulative. And it works; he can see that Wallace doesn't really buy it, but also that the man knows he can't afford to pass up even the remotest chance that Rufus is serious. So he goes back to ranting, but more earnestly this time, with fewer personal insults directed at Rufus and more talk about the Lifestream.

Then someone taps at the door, and Rude goes to check who it is, and then the Turk comes back and he has a look on his face that makes Rufus raise his hand to stop Wallace mid-thought. "Sir," says Rude. "It's Commander Harris."

Rude knows how to screen visitors. "Show him in," says Rufus.

The garrison commander comes to the table, salutes, and then says, "President Shinra, WEAPON has been spotted in the water off the coast near Costa del Sol. We believe it is going to attack the city."

_Fuck._ Rufus sets down his fork. "What can we do?"

"I'd like your permission to fire on it. We probably can't do any damage to it while it's underwater, or at this distance, but perhaps we can get it's attention. Draw it here. This is a hardened installation. We can withstand an attack, whereas Costa del Sol cannot."

"Do it," Rufus tells him, and he salutes again and hurries out.

Wallace is silent for a moment, and then says, "Wouldn't expect you to care 'bout Costa del Sol."

The _balls_ of that statement momentarily flips off Rufus's cool mask, and he glares. It's on the tip of his tongue to say, _Thousands of people live in Costa del Sol. What the fuck do you take me for?_

But, of course, he already knows what Wallace takes him for. So he spends a moment to calm himself, picks up his fork again, and says, "It's a valuable shipping port, and it would be expensive to rebuild."

For a moment it looks like Wallace is about to say something; then he looks down at his plate and stabs at his vegetables. Outside the sirens begin to wail, warning citizens to get indoors before the blast shields go up. Rufus says, "What were you saying, before we were interrupted?" and he forces Wallace to continue their little discussion, even when the windows are covered by the building's blast shield, and even when the Mako Cannon fires.

* * *

Is it wrong to masturbate to orgasm to thoughts of a dead man, who was never a lover, in the shower upon waking? Rufus wonders this, the next morning. He isn't able to come up with an answer, and doesn't try too hard as he ejaculates to the memory of Tseng's kiss.

He calls Tseng after breakfast, four times, just to listen to the man's voice recite that calm voicemail greeting. He leaves no message.

The attack on Costa del Sol is averted. Rufus isn't clear on whether the Cannon strikes WEAPON or not, but WEAPON turns toward Junon which is all the matters. Rufus is not exactly thrilled that Junon is now the target, but it's better than the defenseless resort town across the sea.

More demonstrations today in Midgar, and a few in Junon, too. Costa del Sol's citizens would like some answers. Rufus stops there and doesn't continue reading to see what people in other towns are doing. Midgar is the most important location, because it's densely populated and there are so many unemployed in the slums who have nothing better to do with their time. This makes it, potentially, a powder keg; so far everything's been peaceful, but if people realize what Meteor is and what it's going to do, the demonstrations are going to become riots.

Maybe in the end that won't make a difference because everyone is going to die anyway. But Rufus doesn't actually believe that Meteor is going to kill them all; this certainly won't happen if he has any say in it. This is his world, and he's hardly going to just give it up to Sephiroth, and he's hardly without any tools to effect a defense.

So riots cannot be allowed, and Rufus directs Heidegger to suppress these demonstrations (again, without killing anyone if that's possible) before they turn violent. Rufus wants an _orderly_ and _intact_ world at the end of this.

He also instructs Reeve to get the press office a different story. The "solar flare" thing isn't working. Reeve wants to present a version of the truth, and Rufus allows that as long as no mention of everyone dying is part of it. So, that evening the news will report that what was originally believed to be an unusually bright solar flare is actually a new moon that has been captured in orbit. The papers start a campaign to solicit names for it from schoolchildren, in the hope that this will make it seem that much less threatening and more benign. _In completely unrelated news,_ some kind of hitherto-unknown sea monster has been detected in the ocean between Junon and Costa del Sol, but the Shinra military is dealing with it and no one has yet been harmed.

Wallace again accepts Rufus's invitation to dinner, and this time Rufus gets him talking on the important subject: Sephiroth and Meteor.

Sephiroth's plan, according to Wallace, who was apparently there when the General arrogantly explained it, is to slam Meteor into the planet in order to gouge out a wound like the northern crater, only bigger. Mako (or the Lifestream as Wallace insists on calling it) was gathered at the crater in order to, in some way, "heal" this wound, summoned there by the Cetra long ago. A larger impact will collect a correspondingly larger quantity of Mako and Sephiroth intends to be at the center of it immediately after the strike.

It sounds kind of nuts to Rufus, because Mako is fucking dangerous stuff and it's not like bathing in spring water. But he's getting used to the idea that not a lot of this is going to be rational, and he has to deal with it regardless. It's not like Meteor is going to go away just because its summoner's plan is bonkers.

This does fill in some gaps in Rufus's knowledge, and he's appreciative. He thanks Wallace, which seems to take the man completely off guard.

Reno goes home with Rufus again that night, and when Rufus reaches for the liquor Reno presses his lips together but doesn't say anything.

Around midnight the sirens begin to wail; Rufus wakes, still about half-drunk, and he demands a little incoherently for an explanation. Reno makes a phone call and finds out quickly that WEAPON has surfaced off the coast. Heidegger is handling it. The Mako Cannon is fired, and Rufus goes back to sleep.

The following morning, an interim report comes in from the scientists studying Meteor. The preliminary finding, that Meteor is moving relatively slowly due to the way its magic is dragging it toward the planet, has been confirmed. They estimate impact in forty-three days, and provide a detailed chart describing exactly how close Meteor will be at any given time or date.

They've identified what the thing is as well: it's a previously-known meteoroid that, until now, was in a harmless orbit farther out from the sun. They're still working on what the magic is, exactly, that has yanked it out of position and is driving it toward Gaia, but they know that the forces involved are tremendous. Research is still underway.

Rufus sends out an email to the executive listserv, and appends the report. The gist is that he will return to Midgar as soon as this WEAPON thing is dealt with, and he will want ideas on how to take care of Meteor once he is back in the Tower. He wants each department head to get his or her department working on this immediately - _without exception,_ yes, even Building Maintenance and Housekeeping need to get on this, if a maid comes up with something brilliant Rufus wants to know about it - and start generating ideas for how to get rid of Meteor, or shield the planet, or interrupt the spell, or _something._

Of course, this lets tens of thousands of Shinra employees in on the secret, so Rufus includes a threat: the truth about Meteor cannot leave the company, and anyone who is found leaking information will be shot. He knows this threat won't keep the truth under wraps, but maybe it can slow the leaks down. It seems to him that the potential benefit is worth the risk (certainty) of leaks.

WEAPON feints toward Junon all day. Rufus has yet to get a look at the thing, because it stays underwater and a good way off the coast; through binoculars, when it surfaces, he can see a dark smear just at the horizon and nothing more. Heidegger fires the Cannon at it whenever it looks like it's moving off, to keep it focused on Junon, but it won't come close enough for a killing shot.

The activity of WEAPON and the Cannon keep Junon pacified, because nobody wants to be outside when the Cannon fires and _nobody_ wants to be caught out if the creature stalking the city suddenly decides to move in. Midgar has no such fortuity, and with Rufus's blessing Reeve declares martial law and institutes a curfew to keep people off the streets. The army is deployed throughout the city, breaking up gatherings and dispersing citizens.

Rufus knows this won't work forever.

He has everything he wanted from Wallace, but he invites the man to join him again for dinner anyway, because it's a habit by now and because Wallace might have more that Rufus doesn't know enough to ask but which he would nevertheless want to know. Wallace asks Rufus about WEAPON, and why Rufus is trying to defeat it.

Rufus tells him, "WEAPON is bad for business." Wallace scowls, but Rufus doesn't know what the man wants from him. _Because I'm not a monster and I don't want to see ten thousand people get killed by this thing if I can stop that from happening_ is not an answer Wallace is prepared to hear, not from Rufus Shinra.

The Cannon fires again that evening, just after Rufus gets home, and he has even more trouble getting to sleep than usual. _This is my fault,_ he thinks. He should have done something ... something _more_ ... in the crater. He should have shot Cloud Strife. He should have brought one of the Turks with him when he went to the cavern. He should have kept in closer contact with Reeve, and known that Strife's group had regained control of the Black Materia, and acted to take it away from them. The _should haves_ rattle around in his mind, and he can't seem to get intoxicated enough to stop them.

The next afternoon, Rufus has a meeting with Heidegger and the top Junon military brass, on the topic of WEAPON's behavior thus far and options for dealing with it. Is it acting intelligently, or like an animal? There is very little agreement on this. Rufus is tired, unrested, somewhat hung over, and he's not entirely sure he's following the discussion correctly. What he takes away is that sometimes WEAPON appears to be quite smart, and seems to be testing the Cannon, and at other times it does things that are practically random. One thing it is _not_ doing is making itself an easy target.

Everyone has a different idea on what to do, but what Rufus approves is a plan to send out two submarines for recon and an attempt to draw WEAPON closer to Junon. He accepts that they'll probably lose the subs, but they need to get rid of this thing before it attacks a population center, and Rufus needs to get back to Midgar.

Once the meeting is over and everyone is out of his office, Rufus takes out his PHS. _"I apologize that I am not available. Please leave a detailed message and I will return your call at my earliest opportunity."_

"What am I supposed to do?" Rufus asks the voicemail. "I'm a fucking businessman, Tseng, not a soldier." He can listen to the experts, choose a course of action, and then let the military carry it out, but he's aware that he doesn't have the in-depth understanding of military affairs necessary to truly comprehend the possible consequences of each available option. He feels half-blind in this, out of his depth. "Everything is going wrong. Why aren't you here?"

That same evening, after another dinner with Wallace (they talk about Meteor again, although Wallace has nothing new) and after Rufus has gone home, but before he is very drunk, he receives a call from Reeve. The first true riots have broken out in Midgar. They started in the slums but spread quickly to the Sector Two plate, and then approached the Tower but didn't get there before the army mobilized. A large commercial district is on fire.

"They know we're lying with the moon story, sir," Reeve tells him. "Someone leaked. I knew it would happen, just not this quickly."

"Yeah," says Rufus. He knew it, too. He has a glass of bourbon in his hand and takes a drink, and then says, "Have the press office prepare a new story, that's mostly the truth but attributes Meteor to AVALANCHE instead of Sephiroth. Don't release it yet, not until I tell you."

"Yes, sir," says Reeve, although his voice is somewhat dubious. "What are you planning to do?"

"Blame it on AVALANCHE, of course." Isn't that obvious? "We have two of them in custody after all. As soon as Lockhart regains consciousness we can have them executed for it. That should make the public feel better, like Shinra is on top of the situation."

"Yes, sir." And Rufus can tell that Reeve doesn't like this plan, but that doesn't matter because it's the only good way to quell the rioting.

After hanging up with Reeve, Rufus drinks the rest of the bourbon in the glass, and then gives the wall a moody glare. _Rioting._ In Midgar. A sector on fire. A moment of rage grips him, and he throws the glass against the wall and shatters it.

This is fucking bullshit, and he says as much, screams it actually. Reno comes in from the other room at the noise, so Rufus tells him, "Pour me another glass."

There's a moment of hesitation, but before Rufus, in his intoxication, can make an issue of it Reno obeys and splashes more bourbon into a new glass. However, when he brings it to Rufus, instead of putting it into his hand Reno sets it down on the table and slides into Rufus's lap, and kisses him.

Rufus is just drunk enough that he forgets immediately about the glass of whiskey, about the riots and about his anger, and he grabs onto Reno's jacket to pull him closer. The Turk pushes him to lay sideways across the couch, and the next indeterminate time is taken up by Reno's hands opening his clothes and then sliding over his chest, the pressure of Reno's body, Reno sucking on his tongue. Reno is sober and precise; Rufus is almost sloppy drunk and the most he can do is run his hands up Reno's back.

He never actually gets an erection, which becomes clear when Reno eases a hand between them and feels for one, but Rufus is too hammered to be embarrassed by this and Reno doesn't say anything. So they just make out until Rufus is ready to drop off to sleep, and then Reno puts him to bed.

He does remember something of what upset him, before Reno leaves. "This is fucking bullshit, Reno," Rufus says, and the words are slurred all over the place but Reno nevertheless understands.

Reno strokes his fingers through Rufus's hair. "You can handle it, yeah?" He gives Rufus a kiss, and then leaves him to sleep.

When the door is closed Rufus gropes on the table for his PHS and fumbles it open. _"I apologize that I am not available. Please leave a detailed message and I will return your call at my earliest opportunity."_ Only then is he able to sleep.


	11. the Highwind

Rufus thinks about calling in Veld, but ultimately decides against it. It's a hard decision; there are some good arguments in favor. Veld has expertise, after all. Not only would this boost the personnel count by one experienced Turk immediately, but Veld would probably have some ideas for what courses of action Rufus should take.

Despite this, Rufus eventually decides not to do it. For one, he doesn't know where Veld is _(Tseng would have known, Tseng surely kept track of him)_ and he'd have to get Reno to run the man down. Rufus is not prepared, not just now, to have that conversation with his Turks, about how he lied to them, put them through the things he put them through. And what if Veld has somehow gotten himself killed in the interim? That would be the worst of all worlds.

Even if Veld is safe and can be located, there is a strong possibility that he won't want anything to do with Rufus. After all, Rufus essentially had him mock-executed without any warning. Sure, it wasn't lethal, but Veld _didn't know that at the time,_ and staring down what you think is going to be your own death has to be awful. Maybe Veld won't forgive him. Then there's Scarlet and Heidegger, especially Heidegger, the whole reason Rufus hadn't explained everything to Reno and Rude immediately after taking over the presidency. He can't get rid of Heidegger _now,_ not when he's relying on the man to coordinate the military. It's turning out that Heidegger is actually really efficient at this, and Rufus can't possibly replace him in the middle of this crisis.

And then there's Reno to consider. He's just now settling into his position as the department Director. He wouldn't appreciate being demoted again at this point. And that's probably the pettiest reason Rufus could possibly cite to himself, but there's no way that the real reason is that he isn't yet ready to truly replace Tseng.

* * *

A report comes in from the home office that raises a really good question that Rufus hadn't even thought to ask: why is WEAPON attacking Junon? The obvious response (because Junon attacked it first) only pushes the question back one step and doesn't answer it. WEAPON is supposed to be the planet's self-defense mechanism. Why isn't it doing something about Meteor, or at least going after Sephiroth?

Rufus is just so accustomed to people attacking Shinra, for invented reasons or no reason at all, that it never crossed his mind to wonder why a giant monster might get it into its head to do the same thing. The Science Department is paid to ask questions like this, and Rufus gains a new appreciation for the value of having employees with that kind of unstructured job description.

The character of the crater on the northern continent has changed, and the Science Department believes that to be the answer. The crater has been hollowed out, and is covered with a hemispherical barrier. Detailed analysis of the barrier is not possible without more time and a closer look than the scientists have been able to get, but initial fly-bys have not revealed much because the barrier is impervious to scanning magic. The report outlines the hypothesis that Sephiroth has erected the barrier (either purposefully or as a side-effect of the Black Materia) and it is shielding him from WEAPON. WEAPON can't isolate the true threat, and is lashing out at the most convenient target.

Rufus forwards this report to the executive listserv, in order to add this data to the could-be-part-of-a-solution pile.

* * *

Rufus decides he's done fucking around with WEAPON, and, as though reading his mind, WEAPON decides that it's done fucking around with Junon and commences its first serious assault on the city.

Rufus wants to start a coordinated action to pound the damned thing with as much conventional artillery as they can, and draw it back toward Junon. Heidegger agrees that this would be a good idea, and draws up a plan involving the navy and the Mako Cannon, but leaving out the _Highwind_ entirely. When Rufus points this out - the airship has missiles and is highly mobile, so it would make sense to use it - Heidegger starts coming up with reasons why they shouldn't involve the _Highwind_ and they don't sound quite right to Rufus. But then the sirens start to wail and someone runs into the conference room with the news, "WEAPON is attacking!" and the discussion is over.

The creature comes steaming in toward the city just beneath the surface, pushing a vast wave ahead of it. Rufus dashes into the command center just in time to see the Cannon take a shot at it, and then WEAPON runs into some of the mines Heidegger has strewn out in the harbor and the explosions send pillars of water skyward.

WEAPON turns, and its tail rises from the sea, and some kind of fin-like structure cuts out of the water. It doesn't seem to have been hit by the Cannon, or if it was it wasn't seriously injured, so Rufus has the army open up with conventional weaponry. It moves out, then back in again and hits two more of the harbor mines, and then it goes for the ships.

The Cannon can't fire again until it is reloaded, and it can't be reloaded until it has cooled down, and so there's nothing Rufus can do but watch, horrified, as WEAPON sinks every ship in the harbor. All of the commercial shipping has been halted, so there are thankfully no civilian vessels out there, but a significant minority of the Shinra navy is on the water. The ships attempt to defend themselves but the "battle" is entirely one-sided; WEAPON doesn't even have to fully surface to do its work, and within thirty minutes the harbor is littered with shattered and sinking vessels. Then WEAPON moves back out to sea, and only when it is gone is the Cannon again loaded and ready to fire.

_It knows,_ Rufus realizes, turning numbly away from the scene unfolding outside, as small boats move out into the harbor to rescue survivors. WEAPON _knows_ how long of a window it has between one firing of the Cannon and the next.

He grabs Heidegger, who is shouting orders relating to the rescue. "Find a way to reload the Mako Cannon faster," Rufus tells the man.

"President Shinra," says Heidegger. "The Cannon ..."

_"Just fucking do it!"_ Rufus yells. "I don't care if you have to build a _new Gaiadamned mechanism_ onto the breach! _Find a way to reload it faster!"_

Heidegger stares, and everyone looks their way; a lot of the chatter in the command center quiets as people turn toward the outburst. _I'm under a lot of pressure right now,_ Rufus almost says, but then he decides that he isn't obligated to explain himself, to anyone, ever. "That is your first _and only_ priority right now, Heidegger," he says, and then looks at all the wide-eyed faces around him. He brushes his hair back, and adds, "Anyone who comes up with a workable method to reload the Mako Cannon in no more than half its current reload time, that can be implemented by tomorrow, will get a bonus equal to your current annual salary."

That should do it. 

Rufus walks out. His hands are shaking so he sticks them into his coat pockets.

He's better by dinner time, not shaking anymore, although his mind keeps replaying the sinking of his ships for him, over and over. A storm front moves in; Rufus's wrist aches, warning him that rain is coming before it starts. Wallace asks what the ruckus was about, and Rufus explains that WEAPON attacked and it had to be fought off. He doesn't mention the massacre.

Tonight, Wallace wants to know what happened to the rest of his companions. "They were released days ago," Rufus tells him, and has a smug moment when this answer makes Wallace shut down in confusion. Clearly the man expected Rufus to say that he had them all shot, and not wanting to hear that answer is probably why he waited so long to inquire.

Wallace's expression softens for just an instant, and then he scowls again and regains that core of resentment that is probably all that sustains him. Rufus changes the subject. "How close were you with Fuhito?" he asks.

It's in this way that he learns that Wallace never had any contact at all with Fuhito or any of the other AVALANCHE members Rufus dealt with in the past; Wallace doesn't even know who Fuhito was and must be told. "Before my time," Wallace says.

_He tried to destroy the world, too._ Rufus doesn't say it. There's no point. Thunder rolls across Junon, and Rufus takes a moment to rub at the pain it brings.

Wallace asks about Sephiroth, and Rufus fills him in on the barrier over the crater, and on WEAPON's attack on Junon, and the postulate that the two things are connected. He also mentions that the doctors think that Lockhart may wake up soon, which Wallace is very happy to hear. Rufus does not mention his plan to scapegoat the two of them as soon as she does.

* * *

Cloud Strife doesn't turn up. It's been a week since the Black Materia was used and Strife disappeared, and not even a hint or a rumor of his presence has been heard. Rufus has to conclude that he's dead. Being bait for Strife was the last possible use he had for keeping the two members of AVALANCHE captive, and so when Lockhart begins to show concrete signs of returning to consciousness the next morning Rufus calls Reeve.

"Put out the report about Meteor," he tells Reeve, "the one that says AVALANCHE did it. Make it breaking news."

"Are you sure about this, sir?" asks Reeve.

What the hell? "Of course," says Rufus. "Fucking do it." He snaps his PHS closed hard in irritation.

Rufus has Heidegger and Scarlet handle the details: Heidegger, because of the security concerns, and Scarlet, because Rufus thinks (correctly, it turns out) that she'll get a kick out of it. It's short notice since he didn't alert them beforehand, but they rise to the occasion and everything is in place (even a press conference!) by the time Lockhart is awake and aware and standing upright late that afternoon.

Maybe Scarlet is enjoying it a little _too_ much, but Rufus won't begrudge her. He understands, after all; he makes sure she knows that he wants a tape made, since he probably won't be able to watch it live.

He goes to see the two members of AVALANCHE to let them know the bad news personally. Rufus sort of feels like he owes it to Wallace, for the pleasant and informative dinner conversation the man has given him over the past week. He intends to break it to them gently, tell them about the riots, explain his reasons ... he doesn't think it will make them feel philosophical or go willingly, but they ought to at least know why they have to die.

Heidegger ruins it by walking in sooner than expected and simply blurting out that "preparations for the public execution are complete." Of course they're not willing to hear anything Rufus has to say after that, and Wallace looks absolutely betrayed.

Really, Rufus thinks, they shouldn't be terribly surprised. They _are_ terrorists. And in the end Rufus has more important things to worry about than the feelings of terrorists.

"Well, enjoy your last moments together," he advises them, and leaves. He wishes he'd had the opportunity to get to know Lockhart, but riot control waits for no man, or woman. Rufus's presser is scheduled after this thing is done, wherein he will have to explain that yes, Meteor is dangerous and not actually a new moon, but Shinra has already identified and punished the perpetrators (AVALANCHE, naturally) and is in the process of eliminating the threat in the sky. Hopefully that will settle public opinion, at least for a while, and Shinra can get back to the real problem and stop worrying about ridiculous shit like riots.

Rufus goes to the command center, checks on the status of the Mako Cannon. Someone (he doesn't yet know who) had the idea to pre-cool the breach of the weapon; the problem is one of heat, not movement, as it takes only minutes to load a shell once the breach is cool enough to safely receive it. The army has heat-shielded some robots and stationed them around the rear third of the Cannon to pour chilled coolant onto it, now, before WEAPON is sighted, and hopefully this pre-cooling will keep the heat down enough to allow a relatively quick reload.

The engineers have said the probability that this will damage the Cannon is nearly one hundred percent, as it is not designed to handle heat flow in this way. Rufus is okay with that if it means WEAPON dies.

Before long - before Rufus can decide that it might be all right for him to go watch the execution after all - the alarm goes up. _"WEAPON is approaching. All military personnel, report to your positions. Repeat: WEAPON is approaching. All military personnel ..."_

Heidegger coordinates the defense, as always. The Cannon fires as soon as WEAPON surfaces, far out to sea, and then Rufus checks the clock. _Twelve minutes to reload._

The Cannon crew make a genuine effort to hit WEAPON, and for a few moments all is quiet and Heidegger speculates that they've hit the thing and repelled it. Then its shadow is spotted under the water, powering toward the city.

There are no more mines in the harbor, not that those stopped it the last time. It enters the harbor at speed, an immense roll of water on its crest, and _great Gaia that thing is enormous_ and Rufus takes an involuntary step back, away from the window.

The Junon military open up on it with literally everything they have, from anti-aircraft weaponry to small arms fire. WEAPON shrugs it all off and slams bodily into the forward mount of the Mako Cannon.

_It knows,_ Rufus thinks, but it can't possibly know about the pre-cooling. He glances at the clock. Eight-and-a-half minutes. He sticks his hands into his pockets.

WEAPON circles, attacks a small boat that was unlucky enough to be out on the water and was unable to reach the dock, and then for the first time it rises up out of the water and Rufus finally gets to _see_ it. He ... wishes he hadn't. Not because it's hideous or anything, but because _it knows._ It has eyes, and intelligence is a dark mirror behind them, and Rufus can see it when the thing turns and scans its gaze across Junon.

It bobs in the water, swaying from side to side as it somehow treads the water and holds itself upright; the motion is slow, majestic, as the creature is enormous. Something changes about it, something moves and parts and opens up and light lances across the harbor and slices into Junon.

The lights flicker and shouts start at the rear of the command center; whatever that did, it was bad. Then WEAPON turns a little, and Rufus is sure that it's looking straight at him.

He glances up at the clock. Four minutes ... and some-odd seconds. Too long. Too late.

Except that it isn't. As WEAPON prepares to do that ... whatever it was, again, attack Junon again and maybe do it straight through the window at Rufus, the Mako Cannon fires. Earlier than anticipated, it fires. Point-blank, directly into WEAPON's face.

The slow, stately movement holding it upright in the water ceases, and it topples, crashing sideways into the ocean; a vast wave boils up from the impact and Rufus sees it swamp the lower portion of the city. A cry rises up behind him, cheering, as the creature falls headless into the water, and Rufus doesn't say anything, or do anything (he hasn't said or done anything at all since giving Heidegger the initial go-ahead to start the defense) but somewhere inside him it feels like he just sidestepped death. And that doesn't feel good at all; it doesn't feel like a victory or a win or anything like that. It feels like nausea actually.

This is not _at all_ what he thought running the Shinra Corporation would be like.

Through the cheering he grabs Heidegger, and tells him, "Make sure that thing is fucking dead," and Heidegger immediately grabs someone else to make sure a sub goes out to survey the wreckage and ensure it's fucking dead. Rufus walks over to the window, watches the enormous impact waves that WEAPON made when it fell spread out, interact with the incoming waves from the ocean, dissipate, become nothing.

His hands are still trembling a little, and he wishes he had something to drink.

Then the _Highwind_ comes around the city, fast, like it's on a mission, and it seems to be heading for the Mako Cannon, and only when Rufus follows its course does he see that some kind of confrontation is taking place out there. On the barrel of the Mako Cannon, of all the places.

The _Highwind_ swoops in, something occurs that is too far away for Rufus to see properly, and then the airship takes off into the sky.

Rufus turns to Heidegger and says, "What just happened there, with my airship?"

* * *

There are no words for Rufus's rage when Heidegger admits that the _Highwind_ has been stolen.

_Stolen._ Rufus goes so insane that he actually attempts to throw Heidegger into the wall, and is only prevented by the fact that doing this is physically impossible given that Heidegger weighs twice as much as he does.

There's some kind of story behind the theft, but Rufus doesn't want or need to hear it. He already knows who did it, the only person who would possibly dare do this. And he doesn't care _how_ Highwind did it. The only thing that matters is the airship's immediately retrieval.

Heidegger is useless on this, worse than useless ... the only thing he can even attempt to do is shoot the airship down, which Rufus is definitely prepared to do if it is turned against Shinra as a weapon. But what he _wants_ is his airship _back,_ not destroyed.

So, after Rufus has calmed down slightly, he gets into a chopper and flies back to Midgar, and he tells Reeve to meet him in his office.

The trip is weird; Rufus has flown between these two cities a hundred times or more, and he knows the scenery by heart. But now ... it's like an alien landscape down there. Something crashed down, hard, flattened half a mountain and burned down most of the forest, and left a dark-blue lake and millions of tons of debris behind; witnesses saw something fiery come down from the sky, so it is believed to be related to the summoning of Meteor. Rufus was told about this but sort of skimmed the reports, being too occupied with WEAPON. But now he's seeing it and it's ... terrible.

All of this is terrible.

Reeve is obediently in Rufus's office when he lands, and he already knows what this is about and is full of apologies. "I'm sorry, sir. I couldn't stop them."

"Bring it _back,"_ Rufus tells him. Seeing the changed landscape on the trip has calmed him slightly, but his anger rises again as he thinks about the _Highwind._ "I don't care what you have to do."

But there is no Cait Sith robot with the AVALANCHE group any longer; when Reeve realized what they were doing and tried to stop them from taking the airship, they destroyed the robot and took it anyway. Rufus fumes, and thinks about telling Reeve to kill those two hostages they took, but Reeve somehow anticipates this and says that if they kill the hostages then they have nothing. No leverage at all. To which Rufus must agree, but on the other hand if they are unwilling to take action against the hostages then they might as well not have hostages in the first place. Power is not power unless it is exercised.

Reeve says, "I can use them to get another Cait into the group. Just killing them won't do anything and we won't be able to retrieve the _Highwind._ It'll take a little time but ... this will work. Sir, let me try."

"I want that airship back, Reeve," says Rufus, and Reeve promises he'll be able to bring the _Highwind_ back, just as long as Rufus gives him a chance. So Rufus agrees.

When Reeve is gone Rufus turns his chair around and stares angrily out the window for a time. He should never have let Strife keep the Tiny Bronco. That obviously gave his companions the notion that Shinra property is actually public property that can be appropriated at any time without consequences.

Rufus is so overcome by fury at this thought that he destroys all of the computer monitors on his desk in a blind moment, and then when he realizes what he's done he has to call his secretary to get IT to come up and replace them. And that just makes him more angry (although in a more controlled way) because people shouldn't be infuriating him so much that he destroys things.

There'll be some fucking consequences this time, he promises himself that. When Rufus gets his hands on Highwind and his cronies, they're going to _wish_ for a fate as benign as Scarlet's gas chamber.

* * *

Heidegger takes credit for the pre-cooling on the Mako Cannon of course, now that it worked out for the good (he hadn't before). Rufus tells him that he'll get the promised bonus at the end of the year, with the idea that maybe he'll be rid of the man by then, and if he isn't then maybe he can just "forget," or have a computer error or something. In the meantime, he tells Reno to find out who really came up with the idea. It worked - the reload went even faster than anticipated, and that turned out to be crucial - and even though the Cannon was, in fact, badly damaged, the person who thought that up probably saved all their lives. Rufus wants the right person rewarded for it.

Reno goes to Junon to investigate personally, and assigns Elena to check up on Rufus. Rufus is not informed; he doesn't even know Elena is in the building until she turns up in his office. Her method is similar to Reno's but much less subtle: she shows up around ten in the evening, unannounced, and just asks him directly when he's going to be done with work.

Rufus is reviewing information on the riot, the damage done, the cost to repair. Almost three hundred people were injured, sixteen killed, more than twelve hundred arrested. Preliminary estimates on damage run into tens of millions of gil. It's really nothing he has to know, but he just got out of a meeting with Reeve on this very topic of the press and the riot and he isn't yet exhausted enough to sleep. Fortunately it doesn't seem as though another riot is brewing quite yet; the execution of AVALANCHE didn't go through properly on account of WEAPON, but the people seem to have been at least partially pacified by the event anyway, and more troops have been posted around the city to ensure things stay quiet.

"In a bit," he says.

Elena comes over to his desk and tells him, "Sir, if you just work and sleep and nothing else, you're going to burn yourself out," and explains that the company needs him to be bright and alert and not worn down.

That annoys him, and he says irritably, "Have you noticed that there's a crisis going on?" and she says yes, of course she has, but that just means that it's _more_ vital that Rufus be at his best, not less.

"You should leave the office no later than six," she tells him. "Then go somewhere. Go on a date, or to the theatre. Or both! Take a date to the theatre! Or at least just walk around somewhere, or go home and read a book or something. Just whatever it takes to forget about everything for a couple of hours, every day. You need to do this _every day."_ She pauses, and adds, "I'm starting to ramble, aren't I, sir?"

"Yes," he tells her, but the flare of irritation is gone now, in favor of amusement. She's trying to tell him what to do, and that's hilarious.

"I'm sorry," she says, but doesn't stop. "You know I'm right, though. I'll be available whenever you decide you want to go somewhere! I know I just joined the department, but you can count on me, sir!"

It's then that he knows that Reno's been talking to her, because there's no way she could know that this has become a habit of his by just observing him for one day. Which means that this looking-after-Rufus thing is an assignment to her, and _that_ means that there's no use arguing with her about it. Rufus is going to have to have words with Reno, but resisting a Turk on an assignment is pointless. "All right," he says, and starts to shut down his computer.

Elena accompanies him as he leaves; she's unobtrusive about it, but she clearly doesn't trust him not to turn right around and return to his office once her back is turned. Rufus dismisses his secretary on the way through, saying, "My babysitter tells me it's past my bedtime," and Elena doesn't look the slightest bit embarrassed to be described that way.

He asks her in the elevator, "What if I have a meeting tomorrow night at eight? Am I allowed to go to it?" Before she can answer, he clarifies, "This isn't hypothetical, I have a meeting tomorrow at eight."

She thinks about it. "I suppose that's okay," she says at last, "but only if you _leave your office_ at six and do something else in the meantime." Rufus laughs, and makes no promises.

When they get to his door he tells her, "You know, I have a computer. What's to stop me from going straight back to work from here?"

He half-expects her to insist on coming in with him, to watch him or to disconnect his computer from the building wireless or something. Instead she says, "Nothing, sir. If you're determined to run yourself into the ground, there's only so much I can do."

Elena starts to make a motion like a salute, but aborts it halfway through with a confused kind of fluster, and then she leaves. Rufus goes into his home, does _not_ get on the computer but instead pours himself a glass of bourbon and, when that isn't enough to knock him out, a second, and goes to sleep.

* * *

The next day, Scarlet and Heidegger have a positive plan for Meteor. That's great, and Rufus is happy to know it. He is less pleased that they've already started implementing it before getting his approval, but they quickly explain why before he can become too aggravated.

The plan is to slam a load of Huge Materia into Meteor, blowing it into many small pieces. These pieces should then disperse, but even if they don't they won't pose much of a threat because they should mostly burn up in the atmosphere before striking the ground. Implementation is already underway because Scarlet was in the process of collecting Huge Materia for another project anyway (she glosses this, doesn't explain what it is, and seems happy when Rufus does not inquire further).

"So it's a Huge Materia warhead," Rufus concludes. "How are we going to deliver it?"

Heidegger turns a bit to Palmer, who looks strangely subdued, and says, "By good fortune we already have a vehicle built, and almost ready."

It takes only a moment for Rufus to realize that they're talking about the Shinra Number 26 rocket. "Will that thing actually fly?" he asks, remembering how sharply-tilted and green-and-brown with algae and rust the rocket was when he last saw it.

But everyone believes it can be made flightready in two weeks or less. The people of Rocket Town (still Shinra employees) are delighted by the idea and began working on it immediately, before even getting the go-ahead from Rufus. Palmer assures Rufus that it will be prepped before the Huge Materia is assembled and ready to be loaded.

So Rufus approves the plan, but makes sure he communicates that he does _not_ appreciate them moving forward before notifying him. Rocket Town he can forgive - it sounds like the techs there just started working on their own when they heard a rumor - but the Huge Materia collection he cannot. Even though he knows Scarlet was already working on it for her other project, he should have been alerted first, and if it was something that had to be moved on immediately then he should have been told immediately.

Scarlet seems inclined to argue about this (probably something about how _that's not how we used to do things)_ but Heidegger is more wary and interrupts and talks over her. He apologizes to Rufus, promises it won't happen again, and raises his voice to repeat it when Scarlet again attempts to interject.

After the meeting breaks up Rufus goes back to his office, and before long Elena comes in. He checks the clock; it is 6 PM.

He looks up but doesn't say anything, and she walks up to his desk with no shame at all. "President Shinra," she says. "I thought we agreed that you'd leave your office between now and your eight-o'clock meeting."

"I don't remember agreeing to that," he tells her.

She does not apologize, nor back down. "Sir, you _need_ to take a break every now and then. You can't just work and sleep! Now, come on, stand up. We're leaving here."

It's not like she's grabbing his arm or anything - she's still on the other side of the desk - but he can tell by the expression on her face that she's not going to take _no_ for an answer. This could be annoying, and Rufus contemplates being annoyed _._ He says to her, "You know that I employ you, right? You work for me, not the other way around. I could fire you."

"Yes, sir," says Elena, and her tone is a little perplexed, like she's not sure why he's saying that. "Come on, we're leaving here."

Rufus decides he's not going to be annoyed; he's going to be _charmed._ She's so forthright. No games, just a straight-up request (he refuses to think of it as an order). "All right." It's only two hours.

She talks him into leaving the building, and then because he's made no plans at all and it's only two hours he decides to go have dinner somewhere outside the Tower. Elena has already secured a car, and they decide on a restaurant together and she calls ahead to alert the place and make sure a private table is ready. Then when they arrive she goes in first to ensure that all is well, but this is a place Rufus's father would go to sometimes and they know how to handle a Shinra dropping by unexpectedly, and everything is fine.

Rufus insists that Elena sit down with him. He says, "I've always liked to know my Turks, but I've just met you really," and asks her to tell him about herself. It takes a bit to get her on track - she _does_ tend to ramble - but by the fish she is describing the fraught relationship she always had with her father and older sister. Rufus is careful not to bring up his own memories of her sister, because it seems like that wound is still too raw; instead he lets her talk, and inquires further whenever it seems like she's running out of things to say.

In this manner, he learns that she is something of a sharpshooter and aspires to improve further, that she lives in Sector Three but wants to move to Five, and that she loves houseplants but just can't seem to keep any alive. During a quiet moment she confesses, "I miss Tseng," and Rufus says, "So do I."

They return to the Tower just in time for Rufus to make his eight-o'clock meeting, and before Elena can excuse herself Rufus asks, "Would you like to go to the theatre with me tomorrow?"

* * *

There was a Huge Materia in the Nibelheim reactor, and Scarlet has secured it without trouble. She also identified some in the Junon, Corel and Fort Condor reactors, and there is trouble with those.

Fort Condor has been a sore spot with Shinra for some time now; the local populace ejected the Shinra administrators from the reactor and hasn't allowed them back in. Rufus's father assigned Heidegger to rectify this, and Heidegger hasn't done it yet.

"They'll sabotage the reactor if we're too aggressive," Heidegger explains. "If we give them the impression that we're going to carpet-bomb the area and execute the survivors, for instance, and they realize they have nothing to lose. But they won't as long as the condors are on the reactor and we pretend that we will stick with conventional warfare so that the condors are out of the line of fire."

"Condors," says Rufus, musing. He's never seen a condor in person, only in pictures and movies, and he wonders if it's possible to re-take the reactor without harming them. Then he decides he doesn't care; the condors will die with everyone else if Meteor is allowed to hit the planet. "Get the materia. Do whatever you have to do."

At first it seems like that's the only issue. The Corel reactor was partially repaired after AVALANCHE destroyed it and has been operating at about a third its intended capacity ever since; it's currently the main source of power to the Gold Saucer. Despite the damage it is firmly in Shinra control, and Scarlet sends a small force to collect the Huge Materia from it. The survivors of Corel live nearby but have never caused any trouble and there's no reason to expect trouble from them now.

So it is that, when Rufus gets an email from Scarlet that says, _The materia from Corel is going to take longer than expected,_ it just doesn't even cross his mind to wonder why. He has other matters to attend (Fort Condor and the progress of Meteor toward Gaia and the need to keep the public calm and holy hell are the company revenues in the toilet right now) and he trusts that Scarlet will handle whatever is wrong.

But she doesn't, and two days later she comes to his office and reports that the materia was stolen by none other than Cid Highwind and the group he has apparently inherited from the deceased Strife. She has no plan for how to get it back.

Rufus does not take this well. He raises his voice to her. He throws a few things at the floor. Scarlet retreats while he almost breaks his phone in the process of getting his secretary to send Reeve up, and he looks up to find that she's gone at which point he unloads his rage and five shotgun shells into one of his computer monitors.

When Reeve arrives he stays well back from the desk, spreads his hands slightly to show that he's unarmed and harmless, and is quiet while Rufus spits invective at him. It's only when Rufus demands to know when he's going to _get his fucking airship back_ that Reeve responds. "Soon," he says. He promises, "Soon." He doesn't have a robot back in the group yet but they have acceded to his hostage-facilitated demand for them to take the robot and he's just waiting for them to pick it up. He says, "They seem to be busy with something else, and I was going to contact them again tomorrow and issue an ultimatum."

"I know what they're doing," says Rufus sourly, and he tells Reeve about the Corel materia. This makes Reeve look alarmed.

"They must be getting information from inside the company," he says, and Rufus was too furious before to realize this for himself but he knows instantly that Reeve is right. How else could Highwind know Shinra was after Huge Materia in the first place, let alone where to find it? "I'll get on that and flush out the leak."

"No," Rufus tells him. "I'll put the Turks on it." Reeve tries to talk him out of this - he can handle it, the Turks are on more important business - but Rufus is in no mood for backtalk and Reeve only gets about four sentences in before Rufus aims his gun at his subordinate and tells him to shut the fuck up. After that Reeve quickly excuses himself and beats a retreat.

Elena shows up not long after, while IT is still in Rufus's office fixing his computer mess. She intends to force him out of the office again but he tells her not today, he's too furious, and for once she doesn't push.

Instead she says, "All right, sir. But, well, if you feel better later let me know. And if you decide you need to talk about it, I'm available." Then she heads for the stairs.

Rufus isn't sure why she says that, but talking things out with one of his Turks honestly sounds like the most natural thing in the world; he's going to assign this to them anyway. He says, "Forget what I just said, where are we going?" and he walks toward the stairs with her. There's a poetry slam happening tonight at a club in Sector Eight, and although she has arranged for a heavy security escort she wants Rufus to get there early so they can secure a quiet corner where he will be less noticeable. Rufus has never been to one of these and doesn't know what to expect, but he's not really averse to getting out of the office for a while even if it turns out to be boring or ridiculous.

In the car he tells her about the information leak, his voice tight with anger, and she agrees that this should be investigated immediately. She calls Reno about it right then, and passes along that Reno is going to put Rude on it sometime in the next five minutes. "We'll find the leak, President Shinra," she says. "Or leaks. There may be more than one, you know."

All is ... not right with the world, exactly, but the swift professionalism is a familiar rhythm to Rufus and his fury mostly evaporates.

They run into a clash between the army and some protesters, and Rufus is no longer angry but the sight doesn't exactly make him happy and he winds up in a mood. The car detours to go around the disturbance, but Rufus can hear the shouting for several blocks.

Elena says quietly, "Meteor has them worried."

A long stretch of silence, before Rufus can admit, "It has _me_ worried."

"You're doing what you can, sir," she says. "That's all anyone can ask of you."

"Is it enough?" He wonders. "If everyone dies, will it be because of me?" Because, in the moment of crisis, the moment that _mattered,_ he froze up and didn't act?

Elena gives him a very serious look and says, "Sir, don't take this the wrong way, but if you ever say something like that again I'm going to punch your lights out." Rufus starts laughing, and that only makes her look more serious and say, "I mean it! The company needs you to be confident, or at least _pretend_ you're confident! How can any of the rest of us stay calm and focused if _you're_ saying things like that? You know what's going on better than any of us, and if you think it's over then everyone is going to think it's over. If you start saying it's your fault, then everyone is going to think it's your fault, and that kind of thing can't end well." She finishes with, "It's my responsibility as a Turk to protect the company from that kind of talk, so if you do it again I'll have to take action."

Rufus isn't laughing anymore; he knows she's right, and although he doesn't think he would have said something like that if she weren't a Turk, he realizes that he can't be going around demoralizing his Turks either. "It's not over," he tells her.

That's enough to satisfy her. "I know, sir," she says.

Then he smiles. "If you ever punch me, I'm going to have you shot."

"I know, sir," she says again, completely earnest. "But I'll do it anyway if it needs to be done."

* * *

Somehow, Highwind gets in the way of the Fort Condor materia, too. Takes it right out of the reactor under the noses of the Shinra forces.

No, not "somehow" ... Rufus knows _exactly_ how the man manages to get halfway across the world in less than a day.

_"That's my fucking airship!"_ he winds up screaming at Reeve as the sun is going down and Meteor makes weird double-shadows fall across the walls. "My fucking company built that fucking airship! It fucking belongs to _me!"_

Reeve isn't arguing - he knows that would be very dangerous to himself - but he's trying to calm Rufus down and the ways he used to calm down Rufus's father aren't working. "I'll get it back, sir, I swear, just give me a few more days."

"I'm going to blow that fucking thing out of the sky!" And Rufus picks up his desk phone, intending to call Heidegger and tell him to destroy the Gaiadamned thing, but he's so furious he can't see or think straight and he misdials; then, rather than try again, he just picks up the phone and throws it straight at the window. "Get Heidegger up here!"

Rather than do that, Reeve says, cautiously, "Sir, if you do that you'll destroy the Huge Materia."

_"I don't care!"_

"You have to care!" Reeve knows that saying this is a risk, but he doesn't want to see all his friends killed, and Rufus doesn't have his gun out yet so Reeve thinks it's just mindless rage at this point. "What are you going to say if Meteor gets here and it's in one piece because you blew up the materia you needed to destroy it?"

Rufus opens his mouth and Reeve interrupts the terrible thing he knows is about to come out. "We can get it back," says Reeve. "I'll bring it back when I bring the airship back."

Maybe it was the wrong act to separate Rufus and Tseng. Tseng is a stabilizing force to everyone around him, and it's become clear to Reeve that Rufus depended on that far more than was originally apparent. Reeve blames those years that Rufus was overseas; he doesn't actually know the younger Shinra all that well and really couldn't have predicted this kind of reaction. It's too late to second-guess himself or alter the situation, but Reeve nevertheless has a moment of wondering if he's done - and is doing - the right thing.

He's counting on what he does remember of Rufus, that he's smart and rational, and on the surety that Rufus doesn't want to die any more than anyone else. The endgame for this isn't something Reeve has a plan for at the moment but anything is better than open battle between Shinra and the _Highwind._ So he says something that makes him feel somewhat dirty but he thinks he has no better option. "Sir," he says, "please. Trust me."

In the end, Rufus agrees to trust him, and Reeve leaves the President's office feeling like a complete rat and with no idea how a meeting that started out with Rufus issuing death threats and breaking office equipment ended with Reeve feeling like _he's_ the one in the wrong.


	12. WEAPON

The Mako Cannon needs extensive repairs, and once the Huge Materia that helps to power it is pulled it won't be able to fire again anyway. Rufus mulls over these two serious, related problems as the materia is carefully disconnected from the Junon reactor. Under other circumstances he might have looked for a way to preserve the Junon materia, but with only four Huge Materia available and two of them already swiped by Cid Highwind, Rufus can't afford to do that. The Junon materia has to go onto the rocket.

But what to do about the Cannon? The damage can be repaired (it's already under repair) but the Junon reactor can't power the Cannon on its own.

Rufus has a meeting with Scarlet anyway, to discuss the progress of the anti-WEAPON and anti-Sephiroth systems she is building, and he brings up the Cannon before they start the rest of the agenda. She points out immediately that the only thing that can take the place of the Huge Materia would be another reactor, a bigger one than the one already powering Junon. Rufus already knows that's unworkable: Mako near Junon is scarce except at the underwater seep, which is why Scarlet and his father went the Huge Materia route in the first place. Not to mention that constructing a new reactor would take time, and Rufus doesn't want the Cannon out of commission for a year. Not when there are more parts of WEAPON running around; there have been reports from sub crews in Junon that suggest another one is lurking underwater in the sea between Junon and Costa del Sol, and Reeve says that a third was spotted near Mideel just that morning.

So, speaking of that, they move on to the in-progress weapon systems. Scarlet has a lot to report; a couple of the systems Rufus approved previously have been built already and are in the testing phase, and she also has a few new designs she wants to try. She's brought some blueprints with her, and she spreads them out for Rufus across his desk. They discuss the designs a bit, and it becomes immediately clear that she is on the same page as Rufus when it comes to priorities; she is aiming for speed of implementation, and nothing that she is proposing will take more than a week to construct.

One of the projects in the works is not a system so much as a series of biological weapons, the deliberate mutation of harmless creatures to turn them into killing machines. This hasn't gone precisely as planned, as the creatures are not as tractable as Scarlet had hoped, but they are apparently quite deadly.

"We just need to be careful how we deploy them," she says. She's brought a preliminary analysis of the newly-constructed monstrosities, and aside from a tendency to eat their handlers they are extraordinarily effective. "I figure we can airdrop them on Sephiroth, as soon as we somehow bring down that barrier."

Rufus can tell why his father kept Scarlet around in spite of her underhanded power plays. She's smart, and she knows her stuff; her estimates on build times are very accurate. Normally Rufus would be more wary of giving Scarlet money to build her dream weapons ... he'd be thinking about the company balance sheet, and about how useful any weaponry they build today is going to be in the future once all of this is over. How much long-term value the company can get out of each design.

Right now, though, he's thinking only about WEAPON, and about Sephiroth, and about how much he loathes sharing his planet with them. The only calculus that matters is the one that comes up with a solution that rids him of them both.

Around one in the afternoon they take a break for lunch, and while waiting for the kitchen to send something up Rufus goes over to the window and looks out at his city. It's just luck, really, that WEAPON decided to go after Costa del Sol instead of Midgar; if it had gone for Midgar there might have been nothing to be done. The Mako Cannon isn't designed to turn far enough to aim at Midgar, and it might have been impossible to draw the creature away from the poorly-defended city and make it fixate on Junon instead.

He says, "Scarlet. What if we moved the Mako Cannon?"

"... to where?"

"To here."

Rufus doesn't explain further than that, and doesn't have to. Scarlet walks over to the window and stands beside him, giving the plate some thoughtful scrutiny. "It would solve the power problem," she says. "If we shut down the grid and fed all reactor output to the Cannon, we could run three ... three-and-a-half times as much juice through it than we could with the materia at Junon." Her eyes narrow. "Maybe enough to reach the crater where Sephiroth is hiding."

A thrill runs through Rufus at that assessment, and it feels like his heart flutters a moment. "I want you to make that happen," he tells her.

"Yes, sir. Give me ten minutes and I'll have my department start on it this afternoon."

* * *

Rufus keeps his father's ashes in the bookcase beside the living room windows. The urn and the one containing his mother's ashes flank a large photograph of the three of them that was taken when Rufus was ten, not long after they moved into the Tower. They were on the roof, with the city behind them, turned so that the incomplete portions of Midgar weren't visible and framed so that the building beneath their feet wasn't visible either; in the photo, it is just them and the city. His father is smiling broadly, his mother has a smaller but still-genuine smile, and Rufus is staring straight at the camera with no expression whatsoever.

He looks at the picture, and at the urns on either side, as the sun moves toward the horizon and Meteor slides through the sky behind it (Meteor is moving farther from the sun's apparent position and it's bigger today, it's getting visibly closer) and Rufus sits on the couch already half-drunk because Elena bullied him into going home promptly at six, and there's more whiskey in his hand so that he can be fully-drunk soon. He's thinking about calling Elena and getting her to take him somewhere, but when he picks up his PHS it isn't Elena that he calls. _"I apologize that I am not available. Please leave a detailed message and I will return your call at my earliest opportunity."_

"I miss you," Rufus says, and the liquor slurs the words around. "Everything's gone to shit. If Dad were here, he'd ..." Rufus laughs a little, but not because it's funny. "Probably break my neck. Or put me a wheelchair at least." Another laugh. "Everything's cocked-up and if I manage to fix this I'll give myself a medal, but I don't know if I'm going to."

Then he lapses into drunken silence until the Shinra voicemail system beeps to warn him that he's about to be cut off; he hangs up and tosses his PHS down onto the couch next to him.

There's an anger inside him, low, lurking like a coiled snake somewhere inside his brainstem, and he knocks back the rest of the glass of bourbon and waits for it to numb his lips and fingers. He thinks about throwing the empty glass at the wall or the window (or the photo, or the urns) but ultimately sets it down intact on the table next to him.

He winds up laying sideways on the couch, as the sun slips below the horizon and Meteor sinks, wrapped in balefire; he watches it dully until he can no longer keep his eyes open.

He imagines Tseng coming in, laying down next to him, saying nothing, and he's now so drunk he can make himself feel it as he drifts to sleep.

* * *

Rufus knows that Cid Highwind is going to go for the Junon materia. The leak in the company hasn't been sealed (it hasn't even been _found)_ and so it seems inevitable. The airship is not seen at all during the three final days it takes to finish safely cycling down the Junon reactor so that the materia can be extracted; Rufus figures Highwind is biding his time. He knows when the Huge Materia will be available for swiping and is just waiting for that point to arrive.

So Rufus sends as much reinforcement as he can to Junon. Reno has found the person who came up with the pre-cooling idea - he describes her as a smart engineer and kind of a jerk about it - but Rufus has no problem with competent jerks and happily signs approval for her promised bonus. He tells Reno to stay in Junon and oversee security on the materia. "Make sure it gets to Rocket Town," he says, and Reno promises that it will.

"We're gonna take it out by sub," says the Turk. "Figure the _Highwind_ won't be able t'track it so easy that way." Rude is in Rocket Town, ensuring that the Shinra Number 26 will be ready to fly by the time the materia arrives; he has troops with him, too.

Everything that can be done is being done. Rufus knows this, and tries to relax. He gets some work done, things that are not related to WEAPON or Meteor, both to get his mind off the bigger issues and because company business must continue. Then Elena comes, right on schedule at six, and they go to a concert. The seats in the concert hall are only half-filled. When he gets home, Rufus has an even harder time getting to sleep than normal.

Reno comes into his office at nine. The news is not good.

"You're never gonna fuckin' believe who I saw at Junon," says Reno. "Cloud fuckin' Strife."

"... you're right," says Rufus after a moment. "I don't believe it."

"Last person I expected _or wanted_ t'see." Then he makes a disgusted kind of scowl and says, "Before you ask, yeah, we lost the materia. You wanna kill me for that, go ahead. I won't say nothin'." He spreads his hands a bit, as though inviting a shot.

"I don't want to kill you," says Rufus. He's not even angry, not yet, not like he was when Cid Highwind took two of the Huge Materia; he thought Strife was _dead._ He was sure of it!

He picks up his phone, but before he hits any numbers his secretary buzzes. "Reeve Tuesti is here to see you, sir."

What an interesting coincidence. "Tell him to come up," says Rufus, and then he hangs up and tells Reno, "Don't leave."

"Wouldn't miss this for the _world,_ sir," says Reno with a nasty smile, and he comes over to stand next to Rufus's desk.

Reeve climbs up the stairs, and his eyes dart over to the Turk beside the President, and Rufus can't read his expression well at this distance but Reeve doesn't look happy at all. When he's halfway across the office Rufus says, "I was just about to call you."

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Mr. President," says Reeve, "but I have important news. Cloud Strife has been discovered and has rejoined the AVALANCHE group."

"No fuckin' shit," says Reno.

Rufus raises a hand to quiet him, and says, "That is _very_ important news, I agree. When exactly were you planning to inform me?"

"I came up here as soon as I found out ..."

_There's_ the anger Rufus was missing five minutes ago; it rushes in, heats his body, sends white haze across his vision. He jumps to his feet and slams his hands down on his desk. _"Bullshit,"_ he yells. "That's fucking _bullshit!_ How long did you know about this?"

"I only found out fifteen minutes ago ..."

Rufus's gun is in his hand an instant later and Reeve snaps his mouth shut. "Are you, honest to _fuck,"_ says Rufus coldly, "going to tell me that you had _no idea_ that Highwind had recovered Strife until _fifteen minutes ago?_ Is that what you're telling me? You expect me to fucking believe that?"

It takes a moment for Reeve to find his voice. "They don't talk to Cait," he says quietly. "They know he's a spy. I only find out about things when they happen right in front of the robot. Sir, I swear, I just found out. I swear."

Several things run through Rufus's head, the most important of which is that Reeve really is the only way to get intelligence on what the terrorists on the _Highwind_ are doing. If he kills Reeve, there is nothing. But if Reeve is really this incompetent, or this ... this ...

Rufus lets the muzzle of his shotgun drop, and he says, "Get the fuck away from me."

Reeve doesn't have to be told twice; he's down the stairs in fifteen seconds flat.

When he's gone, Rufus holsters his weapon and glances at Reno, and he sees in Reno's frown that the Turk is thinking the same thing he is. "Find out what Reeve is really up to," Rufus tells him.

"Yes, sir," says Reno.

* * *

They decide to launch the rocket with the materia they have. They have no other choice. Scarlet and Heidegger load down the warhead with as much conventional explosive as they can make fit, but it's not as compact as Huge Materia and without the other three the power of the warhead can't approach its intended yield.

Rufus goes up onto the roof with a bottle of bourbon two hours after the launch, to watch the impact; it should be visible, especially if it works in blowing Meteor apart. Meteor hangs halfway to the zenith, as bright as the sun and casting a red glow over the world. Rufus leans against the parapet, and drinks. Below him, portions of Sectors One and Eight are sites of heavy construction; a new mount for the Mako Cannon is being assembled there. Off in the distance, beyond the edge of the city, he can see the main piece of the Cannon's barrel creep in slow-motion toward Midgar.

About fifteen minutes later Reno joins him. "Elena told me what she's been doin'," says Reno as he leans against the parapet next to Rufus. "Surprised you went along with it, sir, an' didn't kill her."

"I like her," says Rufus. He takes a sip of whiskey. "She's ... not like other women."

Reno snorts. "I guess you could say that." He takes the bourbon away from Rufus and knocks it back straight from the bottle, then makes a face because it's not watered down the way he likes. "It ain't like _other women_ are all the same or nothin'. Though maybe if you see it that way, it makes sense why you never fuck any."

"I've never found one that did it for me."

"Yeah. I know." They've never before spoken about Rufus's lack of sexual interest in anyone but Reno, and they don't now; Reno changes the subject. "Rude called. He ran 'cross Cloud Strife an' Cid Highwind in Rocket Town. They're on the rocket right now."

That ... actually puts a smile on Rufus's face. "You don't say."

"I do. They ran in t'grab the materia an' Palmer hit the switch before they made it back out."

That's brilliant; Rufus thinks Palmer needs a raise. His mood improves considerably. "I don't know why they've been working so hard to sabotage this project in the first place," he says. "Do they want to die? Do they want all of us to die?" He finishes off his glass and pours himself another.

"Dunno." Reno takes the bottle, takes another swig. "They got their reasons, I suppose. Prob'ly bad ones."

"Probably."

"Not sorry to see 'em go. Especially that Strife character."

Rufus doesn't doubt it; of them all, Reno has had the most run-ins with Strife, most recently while trying to recover data and equipment from a Gelnika transport that went down over the ocean. He hasn't been injured again to the same degree as he was while bringing down the plate, but he surely views an encounter with Strife as something to be positively avoided.

They gaze out over the city for a bit, and then Reno speaks up again. "I read the plan, for what we're gonna do when the shield comes down. I noticed no Turks are goin' t'the crater."

Rufus frowns. "It's a job for the army."

"One of us should go, t'make sure the right shit gets done. I ain't gonna knock the army, but they don't see the same stuff a Turk would see."

That's undeniable, but Rufus is not going to send any of his Turks to the crater and it's not open for discussion. "It's a job for the army," he says again, "and the army will take care of it. Your time is better spent elsewhere."

Reno is silent for a long time, just leaning against the parapet and looking in the general direction of the Cannon mount construction, but his eyes aren't really focused and eventually he nods a bit and says, "Yes, sir." Then he pulls out his PHS, checks the time, and says, "Rocket should be there anytime now."

Rufus swallows another mouthful of bourbon and then says, "This is going to work." It has to work. Even with only one materia on board, it has to work.

He doesn't want to think about what will happen if it doesn't. There's already anxiety chewing at his gut, born from the knowledge that this was chancy even before the materia yield was cut by three-fourths.

They wait in silence after that, trading the bottle of whiskey back and forth and Rufus tries to drown that anxiety in alcohol. Then a sudden, brilliant flash lights the sky. The rocket has reached Meteor.

The light is so bright Rufus must look down, and he shields his eyes with his arm, and after it begins to fade he must blink the spots out of his vision. He wants to be hopeful - it has to have worked, it _has_ to have worked to have been that bright! - but there is still a pit of anxiety in his belly telling him otherwise.

He looks up, and Meteor is still there.

It looks more ... angry now, more fiery in some way that he can't immediately identify. Like it is offended by the attempt to destroy it.

It's still there.

Reno clears his throat. "Now what, Boss?"

_Now what?_ Now what indeed? Rufus lays a hand on his chest, tries to clear out the emotion hunching there so that he can speak with an even tone of voice. "Now," he says, when he feels like he can, "we have to focus on Sephiroth." He sounds calmer than he feels. "If we can take him out, Meteor may well fizzle. Some of the scientists think that he has to actively maintain the spell in order to keep it going. If he's dead, the force dragging Meteor toward us should stop, and Meteor will drift away."

This is easier said than done, of course, and what if Sephiroth is killed and Meteor keeps chugging toward Gaia? That doesn't bear mentioning. Rufus doesn't even want to think about it.

Reno nods in agreement. "Yes, sir," he says.

It didn't work. Meteor should be in pieces right now. It _didn't work._

Fuck Cid Highwind. _Fuck Cid Highwind._ What did he think he was doing? Why would that _fucker_ sabotage this plan? Meteor is still there, and Cid Highwind is to blame. Why would anyone _do_ that?

The emotion that's pulling inside Rufus's chest suddenly yanks, and the half-full bottle of expensive whiskey shatters across the Shinra Tower rooftop.

* * *

The hopes of the planet now rest on the Mako Cannon.

Scarlet's department is frighteningly efficient at moving hardware around, and all of the Cannon's pieces are in or near Midgar within a week. Scaffolding goes up, then the concrete and steel mounting; the loading mechanism is erected just to the rear of the Shinra Tower itself, and power conduits are built from the reactors to the places where the shell-charging apparatus will be placed.

Rufus can see it from his office windows, and he takes to moodily staring at the work instead of concentrating on other things. Thanks to Cid _fucking_ Highwind, the Cannon's relocation is the most important task ever undertaken by Shinra.

There are complaints. More riots erupt in the slums. On the plate, large numbers of people are displaced by the construction, their homes and businesses razed in order to make space for the Cannon mount. Some of them, previously-complacent middle- and upper-class citizens, come to the Tower to lodge their complaints personally. Rufus gives standing orders to have them ejected from the building; he is not interested in their whining. Insofar as the riots go, he tells Heidegger to handle it by whatever means necessary; he isn't sure exactly what Heidegger does, but it works and the riots die down.

Elena no longer comes to roust him out of his office every evening at six. Rufus finds that he misses it.

Every day the Mako Cannon inches closer to complete reassembly. People are on it day and night, crawling everywhere, heavy equipment shifting pieces of the machine around. Racks of brilliant floodlights are mounted on it, lighting the work at night, and more lights are mounted on the points of the weapon so that wayward aircraft don't strike it. Sometimes tests are run, and low booming sounds echo across Midgar.

The barrel is lifted into place, and it takes two full days to align and seat it.

One evening Reno comes to Rufus's office, interrupting yet another session of staring at the Cannon. "You ain't gonna like this, sir," he says. He's been looking at the video files that Reeve stores on the mainframe, the ones from the Cait Sith robot, and, indeed, most of them involve the robot sitting alone in some corner or other of the _Highwind._ But Reno didn't like it, so he charmed the new head of IT into helping him do some comparative studies of all the files, and ... "Most of the footage is duped," Reno says. "Four or five hours of the robot sittin' somewhere, in a loop. It's a long enough loop that someone just lookin' at it prob'ly wouldn't notice." It was only by running the files through a computerized analysis that the looping was found. The majority of the hundreds of hours' worth of files in the mainframe is faked.

"An' one last thing," says Reno. "Those two hostages? They ain't in the Tower anymore."

It doesn't surprise Rufus; he's surprised by the degree to which he's _not_ surprised. "I see," he says.

Reno sticks his hands in his jacket pockets; he looks very dire. "What d'you want me t'do, sir?"

Rufus thinks about it, then turns back toward the window and says, "Nothing. Yet." Outside, the Cannon is defined by its lattice of lights.

The message is heard, and Reno says, "Yes, sir."

Rufus calls a meeting for the next day, to bring himself and everyone else up to speed on the status of the Cannon. Scarlet provides a ten-minute summary - everything is on track, testing is going well, it should be ready to fire in a day or two - and then they move to the topic of powering the Cannon. The full available output of all eight reactors will be channeled to the Cannon (the Sector One reactor is up to three-quarters capacity, which is bad but could be worse). The entire power grid will be taken offline for the duration of the Cannon's firing cycle, and Rufus makes it Reeve's responsibility to bring the reactors up to their maximum output and switch the feed from the city grid to the Cannon.

Reeve raises the expected objections, and Rufus answers them. Even the hospitals? Yes. What about the stress on the grid? Unimportant. The switching stations aren't designed for this, they might blow and make it impossible to bring city power back online. Make it work anyway. _Seriously, you want to cut power to the hospitals?_

That's really what Reeve cares about, and he comes back to it in disbelief. Under normal circumstances Rufus might be sympathetic, and say something about how it will only be for a short time and if they don't do this _everyone_ will die and not just a few ill and injured people in critical care, and maybe he might try to find a way to exempt the hospitals from the switchover or provision them with high-output generators to tide them over during the Cannon's firing cycle.

But these are not normal circumstances, and Rufus knows he's looking at a traitor. Veld was a traitor, and once upon a time so was Rufus. The entire human race was not in jeopardy back then. "This isn't up for debate," Rufus tells Reeve coldly. "This is what you're going to do."

He knows the dagger has found a home when Reeve just looks at the floor and says, "I see."

The meeting then moves on to Heidegger and Scarlet alternately flattering Rufus and flattering themselves; it's a familiar mode to Rufus, he saw them play this game with his father dozens of times, so he just goes along with it while keeping a watch on Reeve out of the corner of his eye. Scarlet declares that she is renaming the Cannon to the _Sister Ray,_ and she does it as though she made the name up or something even though Rufus knows it's what the Cannon crews called it in Junon. Reeve looks like he's trying to swallow a terrible poison.

Things are wrapping up and Scarlet is in the process of gathering up her paperwork when Heidegger's PHS rings. He answers it, listens, and his brows furrow.

"Right," he tells the caller, and snaps his PHS closed. "President Shinra, sir, another WEAPON has been spotted coming out of the ocean. It's heading this way."

* * *

They estimate two hours before WEAPON makes landfall. They don't _know,_ for a fact, that it's going to attack Midgar, but Rufus goes with that assumption because it's safer to believe that and be wrong than the reverse.

"Can the Cannon be fired now?" he asks Scarlet, and she hesitates only a moment, calculating, before saying, "We can make it happen."

She leaves, to scramble her people to abort testing and ready the Cannon immediately. Heidegger leaves as well, to mobilize the army in case the Cannon fails or for whatever reason doesn't work, and Midgar must be defended conventionally.

Reeve also leaves, and Rufus grabs his arm before he goes. "Prep the grid," Rufus tells him with steel in his voice. "When Scarlet tells you, bring it completely down. _Completely_ down."

"... yes, sir, Mr. President," says Reeve.

There's nothing more Rufus can do at that point, so he has his secretary bring him a bottle of bourbon and he has a drink to steady himself.

Heidegger calls about an hour later with interesting news: if WEAPON continues moving straight on to Midgar as it is now, there will be a tactical conjunction when WEAPON is about halfway between Midgar and the sea. "The Cannon shot should just rip through WEAPON, sir," Heidegger says. "If we fire when WEAPON is in the right location, the residue will continue north and hit the shield around the crater."

Rufus asks, "Have you talked to Scarlet? Will it be ready to fire by then?" If it is, this sounds very useful.

"She said it should be." Heidegger cautions that they might have only one shot anyway, because the Cannon is being rushed into service; destroying WEAPON may well damage it again. So Rufus gives his approval to take advantage of this alignment if it at all possible.

Then he stands there, looking out his window with a glass of whiskey in his hand, and he marvels at the sheer power of the company he wields. The Mako Cannon is a miracle of engineering and also physically massive, and not only is this phenomenal weapon under Rufus's command, but he was also able to have it picked up and moved by just willing it to be so. Rufus need only reach out, and the Shinra Corporation will materialize around his hand like a dreadful glove, ready to do his bidding.

He knows he's a little drunk and that this is a silly thought, but it makes him laugh to himself and that's better than thinking about the horror that will rampage through Midgar if the Cannon cannot be readied in time. He flips out his PHS, dials. _"I apologize that I am not available. Please leave a detailed message and I will return your call at my earliest opportunity."_

Rufus calls back a second time, because the sound of Tseng's voice - calm, measured - settles him. He leaves no message.

Some time later his desk phone rings again, and Rufus walks over and hits the speaker button; his secretary transfers Scarlet and Heidegger through.

The Cannon is ready to fire.

"How's the alignment?" asks Rufus, and then downs the rest of his glass of whiskey to quell the acid feeling in his gut.

"It moved right into position," says Heidegger.

"Anytime in the next five minutes should be fine," says Scarlet.

Rufus moves back toward the window. This is it. "Fire," he says.

The next three minutes will replay themselves in Rufus's dreams again and again. The reactors, on standby for the last two hours, immediately ramp up to full output; emerald-lit steam begins to pour out of their stacks. The conduits linking the reactors to the breach of the Cannon start to glow. Midgar seems to hum with power.

Then the lights go out. Starting at the outer edge of the plate, the blackout quickly sweeps inward, darkens the plate, and then the lights in the Tower itself dim and die and Rufus finds himself standing in darkness.

A thrill goes through him, and not a nice one; it was in darkness that he found his father, lying dead in this very office. It was in darkness that Sephiroth killed him.

The reactors flare, sending one final surge of power into the conduits, and then they die themselves; clouds of exhaust hang over each one, barely visible in the red glow of Meteor. There's a moment of quiet, of darkness, of anticipation.

Then the Cannon fires, and there are no blast shields to protect Midgar from the shock wave. It slams through the Tower, gives Rufus a flash of vertigo, a feeling like the Tower is going to collapse beneath him, and blows out all of the lower windows. The noise is louder than it ever was in Junon, standing as he is with nothing between himself and the Cannon but two layers of bulletproof glass and clear air. The plate itself lurches from the recoil, and the Cannon's muzzle flash is almost blinding.

The image burns itself onto Rufus's retinas, and the sound drills into his ears.

It's magnificent. It is Shinra at the height of its power.

Rufus swipes a hand through his hair.

Scarlet and Heidegger are still on speaker, and Heidegger relays news from the spotters. WEAPON has stopped, turned to face the Cannon shell ... it's fallen, burned through ... the shell is continuing and on target for the crater ...

_This is going to work._ Rufus sets down the bourbon and pulls out a handkerchief to wipe the sweat off his palms. It's going to work. The rocket plan didn't work, but this will. WEAPON is down, and Sephiroth will soon be vulnerable.

"WEAPON has been defeated," says Heidegger over the phone. "And ... the barrier is down!"

"Mr. President!" calls Scarlet. "A mass of high-density energy is heading toward Midgar!"

"What?" Of course, it couldn't be that easy. Rufus turns toward the window.

"It's from WEAPON," says Heidegger. "It's going to hit the city."

_Fuck._ Rufus moves closer to the window; he can see it now, a yellow-white glow coming straight in toward the Cannon. "Can we deflect it somehow?"

He never gets an answer. WEAPON's counterattack is moving faster than it first appears, and Rufus has no time to even think of retreating before one of the shots slams into the top floors of the Tower.

* * *

Later, there will be gaps in Rufus's memory.

He will remember being thrown backward, crushing against some structure behind him. He will remember agony, in his back, his legs, from the collision; it hits him weirdly, the pain oddly painless at first, and only blooming into full unbearable torture after a few seconds.

He will remember light, and heat, and his clothes smoking, and he will remember wondering why he can't feel the fire touching him.

He will remember, with pristine clarity, the shattered teeth of glass hanging down and thrusting up into the gap where his window used to be, and the way the shards are licked by yellow-orange tongues of flame.

He will remember being unable to breathe, unable to inhale, the sensation of choking, what feels like a vast hand wrapped around his chest and squeezing the life out of him. He will remember feeling the gentle touch of air on his cheek, coming in through the broken window, and turning toward it in hopes of catching it in a breath.

Then, he will remember nothing.

* * *

Rufus regains consciousness suddenly, with a great desperate inhalation of air, the blind and heaving gasp of a not-quite-drowned victim pulled suddenly from the water. His lungs burn; a cough catches in his throat and he flails, wheezing, unable to fully draw in his breath. There is a crushing pain in his chest, under his sternum, and the ceiling is lurid with a flickering orange glow.

"C'mon, Rufus," says someone next to him. "Shit, c'mon, breathe Rufus." There are hands on Rufus's arms, holding him down. "Rude."

"Move." Another hand comes down over his face, and a moment later a hot wave of magic sweeps through Rufus. It clears some of the burn out of his lungs, and when the hand is removed Rufus is able to inhale. He pants, starved for air. There's smoke in it, and Rufus is caught once again in a panicked cough.

"Fuck." It's Reno, of course; his hair is falling in his eyes and his ponytail is askew, and he looks like he just saw his own mother die. Rufus tries to clutch at his chest, at the pounding pain there, but Reno grabs his arm again and holds it down. "Easy, Rufus, just breathe, okay? Just breathe." Reno turns his head into his sleeve, coughs a few times.

Rufus tries to speak but can't, and Reno tells him not to try talking. Rude then says he wants to give Rufus a second hit from the materia, and does so, and the weird constricting pain around Rufus's heart eases. He's also breathing better afterward, and some of the terror goes out of Reno's eyes.

There's still smoke in the air, fire burning somewhere nearby. Rufus again starts to cough, and so does Reno.

"We gotta move 'im," says the Turk.

Rude again pushes him aside. "I'll carry him."

Being picked up is the most painful thing Rufus has ever experienced, worse than being clobbered over the head, worse than trying to breathe with a fractured rib. It feels like _every_ bone is shattered this time, and Rude somehow manages to shift them all in the process of lifting Rufus, bridal-style, from the floor. Reno says something; Rufus can't understand it. Rude replies, "I'll be right behind you."

Despite having had more magic run through him than Rufus has ever been exposed to before, he can barely move. His head lolls backward over Rude's arm, until Rude shrugs him closer and tucks Rufus's head against his shoulder. There's more smoke in the air now than there was at floor level, and Rufus turns his face toward Rude's shoulder in a futile attempt to evade it; that's the most he can accomplish.

Rude does not dally, however; he's coughing from the smoke, too. Before long they are in the stairwell, where the air is fresher and Rufus can drink in long, sweet breaths of it. The building alarm is going, a low, moaning wail hollowed out by the stairwell. Every step Rude takes downward jars Rufus's injuries, which become steadily more excruciating, but Rufus cannot manage more than a tiny whimper and the occasional weak cough. The trip down the sixty-nine flights of stairs to the ground becomes a single long unending welt of silent pain.

"Easy, sir," says Rude after an uncountable time. His voice is strained, breathless. "Almost there."

Then Reno comes back, and he tells Rude to give Rufus over and then "go find a fuckin' chopper." Rude does not argue and Rufus cannot muster a response at all, so he is transferred over to Reno, an experience which somehow manages to top the excruciating agony of having been picked up from the floor the first time. Rufus might actually pass out again; he won't be able to say for sure afterward.

When he regains his senses he is nestled against Reno, and he can smell Reno's scent, and rest his head against Reno's bony shoulder.

Reno is still walking, carrying Rufus somewhere, and he's talking, saying things like, "Just a little farther," and "You're gonna be okay, sir," and "Great fuckin' Gaia, tell me you're gonna be okay." Rufus is not lightweight, but Reno carries him as though he were a child, with a strength beyond even that which Rufus knew Reno possessed.

They emerge from the building, and the low _thop-thop-thop_ of a helicopter's rotors soon approaches. Rufus is able to raise his head just enough to look that direction, and he registers dully that there is no Shinra logo anywhere on the chopper.

It lands, and Reno hurries toward it, and people emerge from it and meet them halfway, and they have a gurney with them so that Rufus can be loaded into the chopper.

Reno sets Rufus down on the gurney, and Rufus tries to clutch at his jacket because, as painful as it was to be carried, he is afraid to be separated from his Turks and taken away in this strange helicopter that doesn't belong to his company. The people - paramedics? - are asking Reno questions, and Reno is answering them, and he's trying to dislodge Rufus's fingers at the same time.

"Why don't you go with him?" asks Rude, and Rufus is too disoriented to know when Rude got back.

There's a short argument, and Rufus is lifted into the back of the helicopter, and he's almost frantic again at being abandoned to these strangers in a vehicle that could take him anywhere in the world. A mask is pressed against his face, and the urge to cough out the residue of smoke in his throat and lungs fades a bit.

Then Reno climbs in as well and crouches beside him. It's loud, not well insulated, and they put a set of headphones onto Rufus to muffle the noise.

Just before they are dropped over his ears, he hears - with difficulty - Reno say, "Kalm."

Then his Turk grasps his hand, and all is well. Rufus closes his eyes, and feels the chopper leave the ground.


	13. Meteor

Rufus is barely aware of their arrival in Kalm. They give him drugs on the chopper, and by the time the chopper lands the searing agony has dulled to a vague but overwhelming ache, and Reno's hand is merely a muffled pressure on his own; the drugs take away his senses, and he knows nothing but confusion and the pain. In Kalm the drugs are supplemented with magic, and Rufus spends two days delusional. He drifts in and out of consciousness, and has horrifying nightmares - of fire, of the Cannon, of being crushed - and always in all of them he is unable to breathe. In the dreams he's always injured, choking, terrified. Dying. He can't wake from them. Despite the drugs he hurts, constantly, unbearably, and cannot express or escape it.

After two days the magic and potions have done the bulk of their work and Rufus is allowed to wake. The ragged coughing pain in his lungs has eased, and he hurts everywhere, everywhere, but the pain is not what it was before. It takes some time for the drugs to clear and there is a period when Rufus is awake but not fully aware, still caught in his terrible dreams. Then there comes a point when this gradually passes, and he finds himself staring, filled with residual fear and horror, at sympathetic faces.

Reno is one of the faces; he is one of the major reasons why Rufus is awake. He is holding Rufus's hand at first, but as Rufus claws his way back to full consciousness Reno releases his hand and backs away. Later Rufus will be grateful for Reno's observance of decorum, as there are others in the room with them.

When he sees that Rufus is lucid and calm, Reno breaks the news. "We got a problem, Boss."

His tone, his words, the long silence he allows after the statement, allow Rufus pull himself together the rest of the way. Rufus isn't in the Tower, crushed, asphyxiating; this is somewhere else, a pleasant-enough looking room with Reno and two strangers dressed as nurses. There's a window, and Meteor-tinged sunlight is coming in through it. Rufus moves, puts a hand to his chest where that suffocating feeling lingers, where the fear lives, and feels himself wrapped in what can only be bandages.

He's still the President of Shinra, and Reno's actions and tone remind him of such. Rufus tries to clear his throat, discovers that this is painful. "What's happening?" His voice is rough, weak.

There is no indication from Reno that he even notices the roughness and weakness, or the shadows of nightmare in Rufus's eyes, or that Rufus is injured at all; Reno delivers his report in the same voice and manner he would have used in Rufus's office. It helps. Everything helps.

The most important bit of information is that Meteor is still on track, and is now less than a week out. The barrier over the crater is still down, but the second most important bit of information is that a problem has arisen in deploying the necessary weapons to the site: Scarlet and Heidegger are missing.

How that came about turns out to be something of a story. Hojo attempted to take control of the Mako Cannon shortly after WEAPON's attack hit the Tower, in order to fire it a second time (for what purpose, nobody knows). Scarlet believed this would cause some kind of catastrophic failure and probably endanger Midgar. The Turks went to apprehend Hojo and stop this from happening, but ran into Cloud Strife and his merry band of terrorists along the way.

"We cut a deal with 'em, yo," says Reno, while Rufus wonders, distracted, just how Strife managed to survive the destruction of the rocket. "They'd take care of Hojo, so we could head t'the Tower an' look for you." There's a hard glint in Reno's eyes when he adds, "Say what you want about that, sir, but I ain't sorry."

"We'll discuss that later," says Rufus, with the intent to never bring it up again. This is all a little hard to follow; the residue of the drugs and magic are still clouding Rufus's mind. It seems like he ought to be able to fully understand all of this, but he feels like he's just grasping the highlights.

Reno continues. Since that time Scarlet and Heidegger have disappeared; it's Reno's theory, based on some wreckage in Sector Eight, that the two of them attempted to confront Strife using one of Scarlet's new robots. That apparently didn't go too well but Reno thinks they basically asked for it, especially since Reno himself had already told Strife it was okay to head to the Cannon. He suggests that if there's time later (if they are all still alive later, is what he doesn't say but what Rufus hears) Rufus might want to have the wreckage cleared out and the truth of their fate ascertained.

The upshot is that, with both of them out of the action at a minimum and Rufus incommunicado for the last two and a half days, both the Weapons Division and the army itself have become difficult to control. Rude and Reno have been trying to organize the deployment of Scarlet's biological weapons to the crater, but the necessary personnel don't want to answer to Turks and keep insisting that they need orders from their own department heads.

Rufus understands enough to know that this would be infuriating if he had any energy available for fury, but he is very tired and his mind feels like it's wrapped in cotton. "Get them here," he tells Reno, even though he still doesn't really know where _here_ is. "I'll straighten them out."

Reno looks uncomfortable for a moment, and then says, "Sir, I don't think that'd be a good idea."

"Why not?"

"Would be a serious security risk, given your ... condition an' the situation, yeah?"

After some confused thought Rufus has to concede that, but he can't think straight and he can't come up with an alternate plan. "What do you suggest, then?"

Reno thinks that putting a letter with Rufus's signature on it in Rude's hand will be enough. He's even conveniently brought one, typed up on Rufus's stationary, and Rufus practices his signature a few times on a blank sheet so that he can make his name on the letter look passably normal.

"How would I live without you?" asks Rufus, worn out by just this much effort. This time Reno does not reply, but that's all right because they both know the answer already.

Reno then leaves to take care of business, and a Shinra doctor comes in to discuss Rufus's injuries with him and describe the planned course of treatment. He was badly burned but the worst of the healing of the burns is over; they cleaned off the last of the charred skin before letting him wake up. What's under the bandages now is pink and delicate, and Rufus needs to be careful of it while natural healing takes care of the rest. This is all much simpler to grasp than Reno's report, but Rufus is glad he was unconscious earlier and decisions were made for him.

All of his broken bones were set and mended with materia, but those, too, need to finish healing with time instead of magic; this is something Rufus already knows from experience, but he says nothing because there's no need for this doctor to know anything about his prior injuries. Rufus will need to restrict his movement for at least two weeks, and the healing burns will need regular dressing changes for twice that or perhaps longer.

Despite the extensive damage, the doctor is confident that Rufus will make a full recovery. "Your Turk gave you a cure spell at a good time," she tells him. "You'll have marks from the burns for a few months, but they should fade and in a year or so nobody will be able to tell by looking at you."

"Thank you," says Rufus, although his looks are pretty much the least of his worries right now.

Elena shows up next; she'll be staying in the house with him. "Where is this?" Rufus asks her, and she tells him, with some surprise, that this is the Shinra property in Kalm.

Of course. Rufus recognizes it now, the moment she says it. This is one of the downstairs bedrooms, in the rear of the house; the window over there leads to the garden where he played with Dark Nation ... only a few months ago.

Elena gives Rufus a PHS - a new one, his old one was lost. All of the most important numbers are already programmed in. "Call me if you need something, sir," she tells him, and Rufus promises that he will.

When she leaves he checks the address book, and has an unpleasant and painful moment when he sees that Tseng's number is not there.

This has all been exhausting and confusing, and Rufus would like nothing better than to go back to sleep, so he tells the nurse to bring him some whiskey. She refuses and, although she does it in a respectful way and she cites as a reason that it will interfere with his medical treatment, a flat refusal from an employee leaves Rufus momentarily speechless. It's only momentary; a second later he starts to swear at her.

Fortunately for the nurse that's about all Rufus can do, as he can move only with great pain and he has no weapons; he can't even raise his voice. She nods agreeably as he calls her every profanity he knows and threatens both her job and her life. The noise brings Elena back into the room, and she tells Rufus sternly to stop threatening people and go to sleep if that's what he wants.

"What I _want,"_ says Rufus direly, "is some bourbon." How is he supposed to get to sleep without it?

When he says something to that effect the nurse starts to offer some assistance. Rufus curtly cuts her off before she even gets to the end of the first sentence. "No drugs," he tells her. "No magic." He is remembering, with unformed fear, being unable to wake from the nightmares. It was horrible. Horrible. He's only been awake for an hour, he doesn't want to go back into inescapable terror so soon.

"Booze is a drug," Elena tells him, and then she says that if he wants to fire someone for this, he can fire her. "But not until you can stand up. I just won't accept it until then."

So Rufus can do nothing but fume, and eventually he must settle down and at least attempt to sleep without chemical assistance. It's the first time in months that he's even tried.

He's so exhausted that it actually doesn't take him very long, but the sleep into which he falls is fitful and shallow and full of uneasy dreams of suffocation, from which he rouses gasping for air. However, just before dawn he dreams about Dark Nation, and he calls out to her and wakes himself in the process. For a moment afterward he honestly believes that she is still alive and present, and he drops his hand to the bedside and waits for her to push her bony head into his fingers in greeting.

The expected warm nudge does not come. Instead it is one of the nurses, asking solicitously if he needs anything. The human voice is jarring, and Rufus says something unpleasant and is left alone.

* * *

The next day Rufus's wits are a little less fractured, and he wants a change of view; the doctor thinks he's well enough to relocate out to the veranda at least. He's already downstairs (he's in the bedroom where Zerist slept when Rufus was stashed here, Gaia, it might as well have been years ago) so moving him is not that much trouble. After his burns are cleaned and dressed in the morning - they look horrible, but not as horrible as he's sure they looked before all that magic was pumped through him - the two nurses transfer him to a padded wheelchair and take him outside.

The weather is nice enough, clear and cool, with a crisp breeze that kicks up occasionally into an energetic wind and shakes the trees surrounding the back garden. Meteor is enormous and bright in the sky. Rufus keeps his head turned so that he won't see it.

He has a laptop brought out to him, and he attempts to log into the company mainframe but can't get a connection. That's vexing and confusing, and he calls Elena to ask if she knows what the hell is up with that.

"The central computers have been offline since the attack by WEAPON," she tells him. "A lot of the components were destroyed, and they've been working to bring in replacements."

That is incredibly annoying but there's nothing Rufus can do about it. He asks if there is an ETA and is told that there is not, and so he's left without any work that he can usefully do and no idea when that will change.

That turns out to be okay, though, because Rufus asks to be brought a book instead, and it becomes quickly apparent that even reading is too strenuous an activity for him. Within five minutes he is worn out, and he closes the book and sets it down on the blanket covering his lap. The washed-out shadows cast by Meteor draw his gaze, and he moodily stares at the pale lines of them, stretching behind columns and tree trunks like the second arm of a compass.

What would his father say about him now? Rufus doesn't even want to think about it, but he can't help doing it anyway. His father would call him a failure - a loser, maybe - and a complete fuck-up. And ... he'd be right. The company is probably in shambles; in a way Rufus is glad the mainframe is down because this way he can't know just how destroyed Shinra is. The Tower is damaged. Rufus himself is too injured to stand up.

Sephiroth is still alive, and Meteor glares down at the world like a vast and menacing face.

And all Rufus can do is lean wearily back in his chair and try to avoid thinking about how much of a mess this is, and how close Meteor is, and what is going to happen if (when) it gets here, and how little he can do about all of it.

_This is not the end,_ he thinks, because that's what he's been telling everyone, and himself, all along. Shinra will take care of Meteor. Shinra will take care of Sephiroth. That's what everyone has needed to hear all along, including Rufus himself. He lapsed once, and Elena very rightly set him back on track. Optimism is a requirement, not a choice.

Rufus's optimism is slipping. He tries not to let it, tries not to think about it at all, but although he keeps the words from forming in his mind he nevertheless knows the truth. Meteor is coming. It's almost here. Everything Rufus has tried has failed, in some way or another.

_This is not the end,_ he tells himself, and he wants to believe it.

* * *

There's a child in the house. Rufus discovers this when he's startled out of an inadvertent doze by the sound of the door to the house opening and then slamming closed. He jerks (he hadn't meant to fall asleep at all) and the book drops off his lap, and there's a child standing dead still next to the door and she's staring at him like a rabbit in the headlights.

A moment later a woman comes out, saying something about not slamming the doors, and the kid immediately grabs onto her and actually hides behind her. Rufus knows he looks bad but he doesn't think he looks _that_ bad.

"Marlene," the woman gently scolds. "Don't be rude. Say hello."

The child mumbles something that might be a hello while Rufus just stares back in confusion, and then the girl escapes back into the house. The woman remains and apologizes. "She's only four, and she's still learning."

"Who _is_ that?" Rufus asks, "and what is she doing here?" and it's in this way that he learns that the woman in front of him is not one of the house staff as he'd originally assumed. She's Elmyra Gainsborough, and the kid is Barret Wallace's daughter.

Part of Rufus is kind of amazed that Reeve would stash them _here_ of all the places, but in a backhanded kind of way it almost makes sense; there was no reason for Reeve to think that Rufus (or anyone else) would wind up in Kalm, after all. "I see," he says. "I hope everyone has treated you well."

Everyone has, apparently, and Elmyra gives no indication that she's even aware that she and Marlene are hostages. That's interesting to Rufus, because she's clearly an intelligent person and it's impossible that she doesn't know. She asks if there's anything she can do for Rufus, and offers polite condolences on the death of Rufus's father that she clearly does not mean but feels obligated to provide. She expresses bland confidence that Meteor will be deflected, one way or another.

She does not inquire about Aerith, and Rufus concludes that Reeve must have told her already.

Rufus asks if she'd like to have lunch with him later (even though he's hardly in a condition to offer good hospitality) but she politely declines and soon after that she goes back into the house. Before she goes, she promises that Marlene will be less rude the next time. Rufus tells her not to be concerned about it.

This is an unexpected development. He wonders if Elena knows who these two are, if she recognized them.

Rufus's book is on the veranda decking, and he tries to lean over to pick it up but fails because it's too painful to bend that way; he calls Elena and asks her to send someone out to pick it up for him.

Elena comes herself and retrieves the book, dusts it off, and gives it back to him. "Thank you," says Rufus.

"Sir," says Elena. "I'm sorry I didn't come to the Tower after WEAPON attacked." The words are spoken quietly, with guilt. "I thought you had to be dead."

"Maybe I was," says Rufus.

As long as the mainframe is down and Elena is here anyway, Rufus asks her what she knows about the status of the company. The Tower, she says, is pretty trashed; the upper three floors were essentially destroyed, along with most everyone in them, and ten more were seriously damaged. "Your secretary is dead," she says, and that's really bad news and Rufus spends a few minutes being annoyed about it.

Other than the damage to the Tower, the company as a whole, in Elena's impression, is behaving like a car that has suddenly had a wheel come off. Most of the divisions that aren't located in Midgar are doing fine, but the ones that are have become headless and directionless and are skidding all over the place. She thinks that Reno and Rude will have more to say about that when they report in, though, as they are actively working in Midgar right now.

It's ... nothing that Rufus didn't expect, really, but it's still seriously exhausting to hear about it. Fixing this is going to take a shitload of work and right now Rufus is missing several key personnel and he can't even read a book without running into a wall of fatigue. "I see," he says. It feels like a blanket of lead, weighing him down.

_Maybe none of it will make any difference._

"You know we're behind you, sir," says Elena. "The Turks will always be behind you."

"Yes, I know." He does know, and it does help, a little. "Thank you. By the way. Did you know that Elmyra Gainsborough and Barret Wallace's daughter are here at the manor?"

The news takes Elena by surprise; she'd thought, like Rufus had initially, that Elmyra was on staff and Marlene her daughter. Then Elena's expression falls, and she says, a little sadly, "I like them, sir."

"Don't worry," he tells her. If it comes that they have to kill the two of them, he'll get Reno to do it and not Elena. But he's thinking right then that it most likely will not come to that at all.

* * *

The following day, in the morning, Rufus calls Reno.

"We got shit movin'," Reno says, "but the _Highwind_ is at the crater now."

"Oh, you're fucking kidding me." Unbelievable. Even at this extremity, Highwind and Strife are creating obstacles for him.

"I fuckin' ain't." Reno pauses to take a drag off the cigarette he is apparently smoking. "We're armin' the transports an' bringin' in some of the escorts from Junon, gonna create a convoy. Should be ready t'leave for the crater tomorrow."

Great. Another delay. Another totally unnecessary delay. Rufus has a brief and unwelcome moment of wanting to just hide from this, let someone else deal with it, let it deal with itself. He crushes that down and says, "Thank you, Reno. Keep me informed."

An unexpected dining companion joins him for lunch, which Rufus takes in the small room off the kitchen where the staff usually eat, because the dining-room table is too tall for him to sit there in a wheelchair. The child, Marlene, races in just as Rufus is being served, sees him and again stops cold to stare at him.

A few seconds later she looks away. "M'sorry for staring," she says, her voice very quiet. "Yest'day too."

"It's all right," Rufus tells her. "I know I look dreadful."

"Aunty 'Myra says it's rude to stare."

"That's true." Rufus gestures at one of the empty seats at the table and says, "Are you hungry?"

It turns out that she is, so Rufus has some tableware and food brought out for her. She is quiet for a little while - it's quickly apparent that she's never been taught proper table manners and she eats like a barbarian - but eventually she asks what happened to him.

"I got into a fight with a giant monster," Rufus tells her.

"My daddy fights monsters," says Marlene. Her eyes drift down to Rufus's bandaged hands, and then back up to his face. "They look like people, but they're evil and they're not really people."

Interesting. Rufus wonders if Wallace actually believes that, or if it's just a story that he feeds to his preschooler to make his murdering ways seem less horrible. "This one didn't look like a person," says Rufus. "It just looked like a giant monster. It was going to attack Midgar and kill a lot of people, so I had to kill it first."

"Oooh!" says Marlene. "So you're a hero!" Her demeanor brightens instantly.

"Yes," says Rufus, highly amused by the source of this assessment. "I suppose I am."

Marlene starts talking more easily after that, asking his name - "Rufus," is all Rufus says - and giving her expert four-year-old opinion about her father, about Reeve, and about Shinra in general. Her opinions of Shinra are extremely negative and echo the standard AVALANCHE dogma in a distorted and somewhat misunderstood form; she censors nothing, apparently completely unaware that she's talking with the President of Shinra.

It's not the most scintillating conversation Rufus has ever had, but it's actually a relief to not have to think very hard about anything right now. Marlene does have a few interesting things to say, however. Her opinion of Reeve is surprisingly insightful, for instance: "He's one of the Shinra, but he always brings me a popsicles and reads me stories. I don't think he's a monster like the other Shinra. I think he's actually undercover!"

After lunch Rufus wants some fresh air so he moves back onto the veranda. He doesn't try to do anything, not even read a book.

Meteor is huge in the sky, casting a red haze over everything. Rufus doesn't look at it but gazes again at the doubled shadows, and there are thoughts lurking in his mind that he refuses to think because they are terrible and he knows that he's going to be swallowed by despair if he lets them in. It's just ... so close now. It's so close ... he shuts that down. _This is not the end._

Presently the door opens and closes, and Rufus looks up to see Marlene there. Her eyes are on the sky and she looks pensive, perhaps intimidated by the size and brightness of Meteor today.

Then she looks his way, and confirms Rufus's guess by saying, "Don't worry! Daddy will make it go away."

_Your daddy and his friends are keeping the grown-ups from making it go away._ Rufus doesn't say it; there would be no point. He just smiles and nods, and Marlene goes out to play in the garden.

Elmyra Gainsborough comes to dinner (again taken in the staff room), but she is almost silent beside Marlene as the child chatters endlessly. She does react when Marlene relates to her the story of Rufus's heroism ("He got hurt saving everyone in Midgar from a giant monster!"), and she gives Rufus a somewhat skeptical look.

"Is that so," she says, and Marlene assures her that it is so. Rufus just smiles, and says nothing.

Later, when Rufus has been moved from the wheelchair to his bed and he's about to go to sleep, he again asks for some bourbon. He is again refused. Again Elena must come in to defend the staff from Rufus's impotent rage and again Rufus must go to sleep without any liquor.

He again has troubled dreams and wakes often, but the sense of suffocation that has crushed him in his sleep until now is easing, and his fragmented dreams are more often of the Cannon firing than of what came after that.

* * *

The next day the convoy leaves for the crater; Rufus doesn't see it, as it doesn't pass anywhere near Kalm, but Reno calls him to tell him that it's underway. "How you doin', sir?" Reno asks.

Rufus hesitates before answering. He's healing - the many broken bones are in that stage where they ache and ache but there is no sharp pain, and the burns across his skin are almost comfortable when they're dressed - but he still has no energy at all, for anything. Least of all for doing anything personally about the menace in the sky, or about the wreck that is his company's headquarters, or ... anything, really. It all feels like a vast weight on top of him. He shouldn't say as much, but it's Reno. "I'm tired," he says.

"Rude an' I will be there later t'day," says Reno, and his voice is weirdly gentle. "We're takin' care of the last few thin's now, yo."

"Thank you."

With help, Rufus is tucked onto the couch in the sitting room with a book, and he again tries to read but winds up just staring at the page because the conversation with Reno is forcing him to think about Meteor again. It's only two days out; is two days enough time for the convoy to beat its way past the _Highwind,_ enter the crater, destroy Sephiroth, and somehow cause Meteor to cease its plunge toward Gaia?

What is going to happen if (when, no, not when, _if)_ Meteor hits the planet?

Rufus runs a finger over the page and tries not to think about how utterly meaningless all of this is going to be if the world is destroyed, and mostly fails. _There is no being behind the doing. The doing is everything._ In that case, Rufus is nothing. He can't even stand up.

Marlene runs in, heading toward the back door, and Rufus glances up with annoyance because it seems like she is always dashing around and it's beginning to get on his nerves. But she stops when she sees him and comes right over to him, and asks him what he's reading, and Rufus sees no need to take his annoyance out on her, not right now at least. If (not when) Meteor strikes, none of this will matter anyway.

"A story about a dragon," says Rufus, "that everyone hated, but the dragon saved the world."

Marlene climbs up onto the couch next to him, totally uninvited, and asks him to read it to her, and after a very uncomfortable moment Rufus starts to invent a little story for her; at a minimum, this should take his mind off Meteor. He lays a finger one the page as he speaks, moving it across the text as though reading it. "The dragon lived atop a mountain, and had great wealth and enormous power, but the people of the valley hated and feared it."

"Why?" Marlene asks, and Rufus tells her it's because they envied the dragon.

"This was a powerful dragon," he says, pointing at the page as though it says as much there. "Everyone wants power."

"Why?"

"To get the things they need. Like food, and shelter. And to keep other people with more power from taking those things away."

"Why?" And so Rufus tries to explain that people are generally ruthless and selfish, and the ones who aren't are exceptions, but he quickly exceeds Marlene's comprehension level and so he goes back to something easier.

"The dragon had a lot of gold," he tells her. "Everyone wants gold, right?"

He then spins more of the story, about a great calamity and how the dragon set out to avert it, even though a lot of people who hated the dragon tried to stop him because they hated him so much and didn't care that he was trying to save them. The story is fuzzy on the nature of the "calamity" because Rufus doesn't really want to think that hard, but Marlene is uncritical on this point and never asks for a description.

However, while Marlene is unconcerned about the calamity itself, or about the sociopolitical relationship between the dragon and the people of the valley, she is _very_ interested in the details of the dragon's journey from the mountain out to where the calamity is taking place. When Rufus starts to gloss over the trip, she prompts him, "Did he meet _giants?"_ and when he goes along with that, because why not, she adds, "And the giants had a dog! And it could talk!"

"Close," says Rufus, amused now and less uncomfortable with this situation. "It was a talking cat. It was red and the end of its tail was on fire."

The collaboration makes the story more fantastical and less of an expression of Rufus's irritation. Marlene snuggles up to his chest so that she can see the book, and she complains that it has no pictures but she doesn't seem to catch on that Rufus is not actually reading from it. The story detours to a flying castle, populated by sentient robots the size of mice, and the dragon goes through a sequence of successively smaller gates which somehow shrink him down to the size of a mouse, so that he can interact with them. Rufus doesn't worry about making any of it consistent or logical; Marlene is only four, after all. Every now and then he turns a page, still pretending to read.

The story is interrupted when a chopper lands outside, and Reno and Rude walk into the house and catch Rufus relating an encounter between a dragon and an evil robot, with a child snuggled against him. Reno nudges Rude. "Get out your camera!"

Rufus closes the book. "I'm afraid the story is over, Marlene." She complains, of course - she wants to know what happens! - so Rufus promises to finish it later. "Go find Elmyra. I have to do some business now."

When Marlene is gone, Reno says, "Tellin' stories t'little kids, Boss?" A tired glare from Rufus makes the Turk give up that line of questioning, and his expression straightens. "Sorry, sir."

"How's the company?"

Reno and Rude have battened down Shinra as best they can, given that they are Turks and not VPs, and had to essentially intimidate people into cooperation. All of the vital company paperwork and data is being moved out of the Tower and into underground storage, in hopes that if Meteor does strike, the company records at least will survive.

"It's all we can do," says Rufus, acutely aware that it's what _Rude_ and _Reno_ did, and he personally had nothing to do with any of it.

"Yes, sir."

Reno leaves, but Rude remains behind, asking if that kid was Marlene Wallace. "Yes," says Rufus, and, because he knows Rude has a soft spot for kids and finds killing them distasteful, he says the same thing he told Elena. "Don't worry. Reno will handle it, if needed, but I don't think it will be needed."

"Yes, sir," says Rude.

They all dine together that evening, and Marlene is intimidated by the new Turks but doesn't seem to recognize them for what they are, and Reno eventually charms her into re-telling the dragon story from that afternoon. Reno convincingly feigns interest in the tale (or maybe he really is interested, with Reno who can tell) and Marlene soon warms up in the telling and recruits Rufus to help recount it. Elena finds this absolutely hilarious, and has a difficult time hiding that in between bites of her dinner.

It's the evening before Meteorfall, and it's the strangest, and possibly the most relaxing dinner Rufus has had in his life.

* * *

The day ticks over to the final cell of the spreadsheet on Rufus's laptop, the last entry in Meteor's approach schedule. The time estimate for touchdown is 6:29 PM, MST.

After breakfast Rufus goes out onto the veranda. The air is warm but blustery, wind kicking through the trees, and gray clouds race across the sky. Meteor has not yet risen, but the furious glow on the horizon betrays that it will soon.

If (when) it does, what then? Rufus has done all he can (not much, not this past week) and if the expedition to the crater fails then ... at around dusk the end of the world will begin. How will it happen? Will it be like a Mako detonation, where those nearby are killed immediately and those not so close die slowly later? Or will it be all at once, just a flash and the end?

Reno comes out to find him, bringing a report from the Science Department. They've revised the calculations for touchdown, moving the time back fourteen minutes with a revised ETA of 6:43, and they know exactly where Meteor is going to hit first. "Midgar, yo."

Of course. "Of course," says Rufus.

"Maybe it won't hit the city itself," says Reno. "But the company is evacuatin', obviously."

"That's fine," says Rufus, aware that he wouldn't be able to stop people from leaving even if he wanted to.

"Sir," says Reno, and he straightens up. "Rude an' Elena want t'go t'Midgar."

Rufus glances up at him. "Why?"

It turns out that the company employees are essentially just looking out for themselves and their own. Nobody has issued a general evacuation order for the city and certainly nobody has taken charge to organize one. "Rude an' Elena want t'go get folks out."

Yes, of course they would. Rufus looks up at the sky, wonders again how it will happen. He wants his Turks with him. "I'll think about it," he says.

"I'd like t'go too, yeah?" says Reno.

Rufus says nothing. Meteor is beginning to rise, the fiery halo leading the way.

Reno reaches out, lays the back of his hand against Rufus's cheek, and without thinking Rufus turns his head into the touch. "It's our duty, sir," says Reno. "It's our city. It's Shinra's duty."

"What difference will it make?" Rufus touches his lips to Reno's fingers. He wants his Turks _with him._

"Maybe none."

Rufus takes Reno's hand, pulls him down, kisses him, and Reno tastes like coffee and cinnamon and Rufus wants him _here._ He wants his Turks _here._ This could be (will be) the end of everything, and Rufus wants them _here,_ with him, at the end.

He doesn't want to be alone.

When Reno pulls back, he's about to say something and Rufus interrupts. "Go on."

A pause. "Thank you, sir," says Reno. "We'll be back, I promise."

Before six that evening? When there is the entire city to empty? Rufus doesn't think so; he expects to never see any of his Turks again. "Do what you have to do, Reno."

For a moment longer Reno's hand is against Rufus's cheek and Reno looks like he might be about to change his mind, to say that he's going to stay. But he doesn't. He says again, "We'll be back, sir."

Rufus kisses the tips of Reno's fingers. "Bring me some bourbon before you leave."

Ten minutes later Rufus hears a chopper start on the helipad behind the garden. He drops one hand to the side of his chair, wishing and half-expecting to feel Dark Nation's warm ears under his palm, and swigs whiskey straight from the bottle as Meteor slides into the sky.

* * *

The doctor discovers Rufus mid-morning and tries to take the whiskey away from him, but he snarls at her, threatens her, tells her to get him another bottle in case he runs out, because _what fucking difference does it make_ and anyway he employs her and she needs to do what he tells her. It's probably the "what fucking difference does it make" that makes her shrug. "Yes, sir," she says, and later one of the nurses brings him more liquor.

Near noon Marlene comes out to the veranda, but Rufus likes Marlene so her interruption doesn't bother him as much as it would have otherwise. "Hi," he tells her.

She eyes him, and says, "You're drunk."

Rufus laughs. It's painful. "You're right."

"Daddy throws drunks out of the bar," declares Marlene. "He says they're no good."

"I'm not in your daddy's bar. Your daddy's bar doesn't exist." Rufus knocks back another slug of bourbon from the bottle and looks up at Meteor.

"Duh!" Marlene scrunches up her face. "That's 'cause it's _Tifa's_ bar! It's in Sector Seven!"

So nobody ever told Marlene about Sector Seven. Rufus considers doing it, but it's something his father would have done so he decides to withhold that information. "Oh," he says agreeably. "That explains it."

Marlene just stands there quietly for a moment, looking up at Meteor, and then she says, "Daddy's gonna save us, right Rufus?"

_No. Your daddy and his colleagues have probably helped doom us._ "I guess we'll see," says Rufus.

"He'll save us." Marlene's voice is confident now, and she comes up next to Rufus's wheelchair and takes the crippled President's hand. "Don't be scared! My daddy can do anything!"

"I'm not scared," Rufus tells her. "You shouldn't be either." Then he holds out the bottle. "Want some?"

Marlene giggles and makes a _gross_ face and turns it down. "Read me the rest of the story from yesterday!"

"Sure." Rufus gets out his PHS, starts to dial Elena and then remembers with a painful pull that she's gone, and calls one of the nurses instead to bring his book.

* * *

During Meteor's approach it has risen and set like the sun. Early on it was not very far from the sun in the sky, and it has gradually shifted away the sun as it got closer, but until today it has still moved through the sky throughout the day like a celestial body should.

Today it is different. It rises in the morning as usual, but then the day seems to almost elongate as Meteor's ascent to the zenith slows. The sun continues to move across the sky, rising to noon, dropping toward the sea, leaving Meteor behind.

Rufus "reads" to Marlene until almost three, when Elmyra comes looking for the child. She brings Rufus something from the kitchen, which Rufus refuses because he's still drunk and not hungry, and sends Marlene inside the house. "We'd like to leave," she says to Rufus. "If that's all right."

"Where will you go?" Clouds are coming in and the wind is picking up, as though a storm is coming. Meteor is enormous and growing more so, expanding like a malevolent flower as it nears the planet, and its glow shines through the scrim of cloud.

"Not far," says Elmyra. "I have friends here in Kalm. I'd like to be with them."

Rufus understands, and nods. "I'll have the driver take you."

This seems surprise Elmyra, like she was expecting a refusal. "Thank you," she says, and then, "I'd like you to know that I was never angry with you. I know why you did what you did, with Marlene and I."

It's kindly meant, Rufus knows, but nevertheless it angers him. "I don't need your forgiveness," he tells her. "Get the hell out of here before I change my mind." She leaves, immediately and without another word, and Rufus takes an irritated sip of bourbon before calling for a nurse to send out the housekeeper, so he can tell her about their "guests" needing a car.

Rufus doesn't know what Elmyra tells Marlene, but the child does not return to the veranda, to say goodbye or for any other reason.

That's for the best, really. If Rufus can't have his Turks with him, he'd just as soon be alone.

* * *

As the day ages, more clouds come in to cover the sky; Meteor is bright enough to glow through them. Concerned about rain, Rufus has the nurses bring him inside and take him upstairs to the master bedroom, so that he can sit at the broad picture window and watch the end come without concern for the weather. It's a project to get him up to the second floor, but they manage.

Then he tells them, "If you'd like to leave and go elsewhere, you may." They both thank him, and go back downstairs. He doesn't see if they take him up on it.

He can't see Midgar from here, as it is not visible from Kalm without much more height than this house provides, but he knows where it is and he can see that Meteor and the city are coming more-or-less into alignment. That's his city, out there, unseen, about to die. Rufus holds a book in his lap, and gazes out the window toward Midgar.

A quarter past six, there are footsteps outside his door. He turns, intending to send whoever it is away, but the words die on his lips when he sees that it's Reno.

He hadn't heard a helicopter arrive; the whipping wind must have masked it. "You're back," he says. Reno's clothes are dusty and stained, and one of his jacket sleeves is ripped but Rufus sees no blood.

Reno looks annoyed. "Yeah," he says. "We're back." Rufus supposes that the Turk must be irritated at the President's assumption that they _wouldn't_ make it back, but he's proven wrong almost immediately. "You'll never guess who we met in Midgar." He doesn't wait for Rufus to try to guess. "Veld."

"... oh." Reno is right; Rufus, indeed, would have never guessed that.

"Why didn't you _tell me?"_ says Reno. He has his mag-rod in his hand, and he raps it on the bookcase next to him to punctuate his words. "Communi-fuckin'- _cation!"_

"I had my reasons," Rufus tells him, and there's no point in going into it now. Not when, barring some miracle, they're all about to die.

Some of the anger clears off Reno's face. "I'd like t'hear 'em later." He turns his head, listening to something else in the house that Rufus can't hear, then he calls into the hallway, "Up here!" To Rufus he says, "We ran int'someone else in Midgar, too."

Rufus doesn't really want to talk about Veld right now, or anyone else; he wants nothing more than for Reno to come over to him, to have Rude and Elena come upstairs and join them, for them to be next to him. "I see," he says, not inviting more.

Then the rest of his Turks walk into the room, and with them ... is ...

"Tseng." The name slips from between Rufus's lips.

His suit is somewhat the worse for wear, like Reno's, and his hair is disheveled, and there's a smear of dust across the side of his face. The muss makes him look _real,_ like he's really standing there and is not an apparition constructed out of Rufus's mind.

"There's a story behind this," says Reno, all traces of irritation gone from his voice and manner. "You'll be interested, sir!"

Tseng interrupts. "Please excuse us a moment," he says.

The request takes Reno by surprise, and he glances between Rufus and Tseng; then he shrugs and obeys, herding Rude and Elena out of the doorway as he goes. Tseng closes the door behind them.

Rufus is staring, and he knows it, but he can't look away. Is this real? Tseng _looks_ real, but is this really real? He's been drinking all day, maybe this is some kind of intoxication dream.

"How?" he asks at last.

Tseng crosses the room, and when Rufus raises his hand Tseng takes it, and he lets himself be pulled closer. "It's a long story," says Tseng. "Reno is correct. You will be interested."

Questions crowd Rufus's mind, _How, When, Why,_ but all he can say is the most obvious, the most inane thing. "I thought you were dead."

"I didn't know, sir." Tseng kneels, and Rufus raises a hand to his face; he can barely feel it through the bandages on his fingers. "If I'd known you'd been told that, I would have come straight back."

"I thought you were dead," says Rufus again, and there's a catch in the words, pressure in his throat, pain in his chest from how badly he's wanted Tseng back and now, now here he is. He still has a hard time believing it.

He moves his fingers, and the bandages make a light scratchy sound over Tseng's cheek.

Tseng takes his hand, kisses his fingers, much the way Rufus kissed Reno's fingers earlier in the day. Rufus grips Tseng's hand, brings it up to his own mouth, and Tseng rises to follow, puts his hands on the arms of the wheelchair and leans in, and Rufus tilts his head back and moans a little because Tseng is kissing him. He puts his hands behind Tseng's head, and although he can't put any strength into it Tseng moves closer, kisses harder, his tongue deep in Rufus's mouth. Rufus closes his eyes, and it's that much more like a dream.

Tseng is back. Tseng is kissing him. What he's wished for, hoped for, longed for, ached for, it's happening now. It's so much. It's _too_ much. It's more than Rufus can bear, and he makes a soft sound into Tseng's mouth, a little noise that he can't repress. Tseng draws back, and Rufus can't prevent it.

"I'm sorry, sir," whispers the Turk against Rufus's lips. "I didn't know."

"I missed you." He's drunk and that makes him maudlin, but the pressure in his throat is easing, defeated by long practice. If he could he would pull Tseng close, reassure himself with the solid warmth of the man's body. His injuries forestall it.

"I know," says Tseng, and then again, "I'm so sorry, sir. It won't happen again."

When Rufus is composed once more, Tseng opens the door and the other three Turks file in. Reno starts to talk, about the evacuation of Midgar, but Rufus raises a hand to stop him. "It doesn't matter," he says. His voice is steady. There's still pain inside him, but it doesn't leak into his words.

They pull up chairs around Rufus; Rude and Reno retrieve theirs from other rooms. Rufus says, "Thank you. All of you. For everything. I'm sorry I wasn't able to stop ... this." He watches Tseng, can't take his eyes off Tseng.

"We did everythin' we could," says Reno, and that's the end of that.

It's the end of everything, really. Meteor is drilling through the clouds, dragged by inexorable magic toward the planet, and the planet rolls to place Midgar beneath it. Elsewhere the sky is stormy and leaden, although the rain hasn't come; the trees in the garden shake with a sound like waves of static. Rufus glances toward the red horror on the horizon in the direction of Midgar, and he wonders, did they do everything they could?

He thinks, he should have shot Cloud Strife in the crater. He could have, if he'd only kept his wits. Strife would have probably killed him for it, but at least everyone else would have made it through.

His gaze returns to Tseng. If Tseng had been there, things would have been different, would be different now. Tseng would have known what to do, and he would have done it. Rufus ... is not as wise.

This is his fault, really.

He doesn't say it. The Turks don't need to hear that, not from him, not even now, at the end. "Yes," he says instead. The pain returns to his throat, and he has to swallow past it. "We did everything we could."

* * *

Just as the sky in the direction of Midgar is becoming very bright, very red and very bright, Mako begins to rise up from the ground in the garden.

It's the most bizarre thing Rufus has ever seen or could even imagine, and at first he just stares at it, not comprehending. He knows Mako. Mako is his business. This is just not a thing that Mako does.

This is the end of the world, though, and maybe anything can happen.

Green mist rises, filtering upward through the earth; it begins to twine together into threads and then into tendrils, and flows into the air. As high as the window, it rises, and then higher, overtopping the trees. The trees themselves seem to be oozing a mist of Mako.

"What the fuck," says Reno.

It starts to come up through the floorboards, writhing around Rufus and the Turks, and this would be very alarming if it weren't the end of everything anyway. The Turks step away, but Rufus reaches out and runs his fingers through the tendril twisting up beside him; he's always wondered what it felt like. He always imagined it must burn - Mako is corrosive - but on his fingers it's cool, like a soft flow of immaterial water. "It must be a reaction to Meteor," he says. Although he has no idea _why,_ there is no other good explanation.

Reno, who has seen better than most what Mako can do to a human body, says warily, "Don't think y'oughta be touchin' that, Boss."

"No harm now," says Rufus. His world is dying; maybe this is its last gasp. Besides which, Mako is his business. It built his family fortune. It seems right to say goodbye to it, and anyway ... the flow is beautiful. It runs right through his flesh, elusive as a spirit.

The stream of Mako strengthens, reaches out the window, joins with the others flowing out of the garden, and there are so many tendrils of it now that Rufus can no longer see the sky.

"What time is it?" he asks.

Reno checks his PHS. "Six-thirty," he says. "Almost time." Then he sniffs and says, "Who wants some booze? We got fifteen minutes t'get hammered."

There's a moment when the other Turks think it over. "Sure," says Elena.

"Sure," agrees Rude.

"What do you have?" asks Tseng, and Reno pulls out a bottle of rye that he brought up from the first floor.

All of the Turks then glance at Rufus, their expressions questioning how he feels about this plan to get drunk while on duty. In response Rufus lifts the second bottle of bourbon, which he opened just before they all got there. "I'm already hammered," he tells them. He takes a drink and then passes it over.

The Turks take their liquor straight from the bottle, and move their chairs so that the Mako stream isn't touching them but they can still share with each other and with Rufus. There's no point anymore in looking out the window - the Mako blocks everything - and that's just as well really. It was kind of morbid to want to watch it.

They start to talk about meeting Veld in the city, how he just turned up without any warning to assist with the evacuation and how they all fell back into their accustomed roles as though he'd never left. Nobody tries to again ask Rufus why he did it. They talk about meeting up with Tseng soon after Veld; Tseng had come to Midgar for the same reason as the rest. "Happy times, yo," says Reno with a swig of whiskey.

"Great minds think alike," is Rude's opinion.

Veld didn't return with them, though; he wanted to get back to his daughter. Tseng starts to offer an apology for that, but Rufus dismisses it. "If any of you had families," says Rufus, "I would expect you to want to be with them."

Reno stares, and Rude says, with great dignity, "President Shinra, I _am_ with my family."

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be, sir," says Elena.

Rufus smiles. He can't help it. "There's nowhere else I'd rather be, either."


	14. Edge

Rufus wakes the next morning from his alcohol-facilitated slumber, to his great surprise.

He's is uncomfortable from having slept sitting upright, aching in places and unbearably painful in other places, and he makes a noise to this effect; Rude is in the room, waiting for him to waken, and he summons the nurses to tend to the President.

"What happened?" Rufus asks, drowsy and disoriented. There's sunlight coming in the window, and although it's gray and overcast there's nothing in it to indicate that the end of the world has come and gone.

"We don't know yet, sir," Rude tells him. "Tseng is looking into it."

_Tseng._ He's really alive. Rufus didn't just imagine it, or have a drunken dream. That hard ache returns to his chest, a bound-up emotion that he'd thought he'd left behind. Rufus touches a hand to the pain, collects himself. "I want to see everyone up here in an hour," he tells Rude.

"Yes, sir."

The Turks arrive in an hour, after Rufus, bathed and shaved and with fresh dressings over his burns, has been tucked into bed (upstairs this time). They are better-groomed than they were last night, tidy and professional for the most part, and even Reno is in a clean suit. Tseng comes to stand beside the bed, the other three lined up next to him.

He is so, so beautiful. Rufus can hardly believe he's real. "First things first," says the President. "What's going on with Meteor?"

They don't know much. Tseng and Reno have been calling around, and thus far all they have been able to ascertain is that Meteor has disintegrated. Theories for how and why this occurred abound, and Tseng goes through a few rumors that he's collected. AVALANCHE was destroyed, and the magic of Meteor dissipated. Meteor went incorporeal and sank into the ground, and is still on-track to destroy the planet from the core out. It rebounded off the atmosphere. A secret remnant of the Cetra emerged from hiding and took care of it. The Shinra army destroyed it using the Mako Cannon. The Shinra army destroyed it using a new and previously-untested weapon. An interaction with all that Mako that boiled up out of the ground broke it apart. AVALANCHE reversed their own spell because they didn't want to die.

There are more stories, but Tseng snaps his notebook closed on them and says, "We don't know the truth of it yet."

"Let me know when you do," says Rufus, and then he turns to the question that has been pressing on him since yesterday evening. It didn't seem important then, when the last minutes of life were upon them, but it seems things have changed. "What happened to you, Tseng?"

Tseng glances toward the other Turks, then back to Rufus; his gaze glances down Rufus's bandaged hands. "You won't like this, sir. Please try to remain calm."

"Don't hurt yourself," says Reno.

Ominous words. Rufus says, "Tell me."

They tell him. It was Reeve.

Reeve found Tseng, mortally wounded, using one of his robots. Tseng remembers a spell, healing the sword wound enough to save his life, but very little after that; he presumes that Reeve smuggled him somehow onto the _Highwind_ when Elena returned to the Temple of the Ancients.

Rufus goes cold under the coverlet, and icy rage crashes through his heart as the news sinks in. So, while he was in agony in his office at thinking Tseng dead, Tseng himself had been on the airship tethered to the Tower just outside. And Reeve had known that. Reeve had _known_ that, he'd watched Rufus drink himself blind in grief, and had told him poisonous lies.

It's so horrendous, so overwhelming, that Rufus barely hears the rest of the story, catching only the broad strokes. Tseng awoke in Junon, recovered without initially realizing that he was out of touch with the rest of the company, but soon twigged that the emails and other communications he was exchanging with the other Turks and with Rufus himself were being spoofed. Unclear on whom he could trust and who was an enemy, he presumed he was a hostage and escaped from the facility in Junon as soon as he was well enough to do so. He hadn't dared attempt to make contact with the Junon office, and had instead hidden out in Junon until he had an opportunity to steal a helicopter and fly to Midgar.

Rufus interrupts what is turning into an intricate story, full of all the wrong details. "Enough," he says, and Tseng falls silent. "Where is Reeve now?"

It's Reno who answers. "Not sure, sir," he says. "Everythin's gone t'shit. Midgar is a wreck. Can't even verify who's alive and who's dead, exactly."

"Find him. If he's still alive, bring him here alive."

There are other things to do, though, more immediately important things. Information, mostly. Rufus needs to know exactly what has happened, and even the news that Midgar is in ruins comes third-hand because the Turks have not actually seen it. The Turks agree that their primary mission right now is information, but Tseng refuses to leave Rufus unguarded. He assigns Rude to stay in the house.

_No,_ Rufus almost says. _You stay yourself._ But he holds his peace.

The other Turks walk out, and a few minutes later the sound of the chopper starting up on the helipad drifts in through the open window, soon followed by the sound of it flying away. Rude ensures that Rufus has his PHS number programmed into his phone, and assures the President that he will be within easy earshot at all times.

Rufus knows why Tseng couldn't stay with him, why the quiet Turk had to run off again only twelve hours after his return. Knows, and agrees. And Tseng will be back soon. He tells himself that. "Thank you," he says to Rude. "Please ask the housekeeper to have a light breakfast sent up here. Then you are dismissed."

* * *

The Turks report in that evening, via conference call. It's true: Midgar is all but destroyed. The Tower is still standing but is in shambles. Buildings all over the plate have been flattened, as if a great hand came down and crushed them. There's dust and debris everywhere. The plate itself seems unstable; parts of Sector Five are tilted, with some of the secondary supports under one corner giving way and much of the intra-plate structure collapsed. A detailed inspection of the city will require engineers, but it is Reno's opinion that at the moment Midgar is entirely unsafe for occupation.

Most of the Midgar-based Shinra personnel that Reno has tried to contact are missing. Reno doesn't think they're dead as a rule - although probably some of them are - but that they have mainly just fled without taking the time to leave a forwarding address. The few he has managed to reach, he describes as wanting direction. What should they do, now that the end of the world has come and gone and they are still alive?

Elena reports that the Junon satellite office is more-or-less intact, with only a few desertions so far and little physical damage. That's very good news. Tseng has checked the stored records and everything is secure, with no sign that the devastation of Meteor came anywhere near the storage facilities.

It's a painful decision, but it takes only a few moments of thought for Rufus to make it. "We'll move headquarters to Junon," he tells the Turks. "We'll start implementing the disaster recovery plan with that in mind."

"What about Midgar, sir?" asks Reno.

There's a tight spot in Rufus's throat, but it does not manifest in his voice. "Abandon it," he says. "For now, at least. Later we'll look at perhaps repairing the plate. Now is not the time for that."

"Yes, sir."

"Direct all the executives you can find to Junon. Anyone you can't find we'll just write off, as dead or terminated from the company. I'll be at Junon myself, soon."

When the conference call is over, Rufus summons the doctor. It's her professional opinion that he should not leave the Kalm manor house for at least another week, but he's the President and she doesn't look surprised when he says with irritation that he can't remain secluded that long. "I should go to Junon first," she tells him, "and get the facilities prepared for you. If everything is in order you can follow a day later." That's acceptable. Rufus tells Rude to arrange a helicopter for her.

* * *

When it comes down to it, Rufus is no longer in anything like critical condition, but the relocation to Junon nevertheless wears him out. The vibrations of the chopper's engine and rotors buzz within his barely-knitted bones and across the fragile skin beneath his bandages, and he feels bruised and beaten when he's assisted off the chopper. The driver pulls the waiting limo right up next to the helicopter, but Rufus is barely able to hobble the few necessary steps to get into it, even with Rude's support.

Elena is in the car, and she looks appalled when Rufus is helped in. "Do I look that bad?" he asks her.

"Uh, no, sir," she says, and then, "Yes, kind of."

"Hmmm," says Rude, not disagreeing.

"The medical team set up some equipment in the Presidential suite at the hotel," continues Elena. "You should have them look over you and then maybe rest for a while."

"I have work to do," says Rufus, although just the thought of it exhausts him.

"I told everyone you might need to take care of a few things before you call a meeting. There's no rush, sir."

Rufus really wants to live in the Junon condo, but they're ready for him at the hotel so he goes there. He intends to just be checked over, to ensure that he didn't re-break anything on the chopper, and then head over to the offices, but then he catches sight of himself in the mirror.

He looks ghastly. What can be seen of his skin is gray where it isn't inflamed red, and there are bruises around his eyes. He hadn't realized the short trip to Junon would take so much out of him. Rufus feels kind of ghastly, too. He's been out of touch with the company too long and he wants to at least attempt to fix that, but his appearance changes his mind. He can't go into a meeting looking like this, not if he wants anyone to take him seriously.

So he lays down intending to nap for an hour or so, winds up sleeping the rest of the day and only wakes when one of the nurses comes to do a dressing change on his burns. When that business is completed Rufus has dinner, and Rude stands watch while he eats.

As the minutes pass Rude looks more and more troubled, and presently he says, "Sir. May I ask you something?"

Rufus hesitates, and then addresses what he knows is coming. "I had my reasons."

Rude nods, but says, "Will we ever deserve to know those reasons?"

It's a fair question. Rufus takes a few moments to contemplate it, eating his dinner while he thinks. "Thank you," he says eventually. "You've been loyal even though I know that what I did hurt you." That's the important part, really.

"I'm a Turk, sir."

"It's not a question of whether or not you deserve it," continues Rufus. "Of course you deserve it." He sets down his fork. "I intended to tell you all, after ... everything. But there just ... never seemed to be a good time."

Rude is quiet, demanding nothing, and Rufus knows that if he decides to just let it drop and forget this conversation took place, Rude will allow that. "You understand," says Rufus, "that I didn't know that only a few Turks would be ... alive, in the end. I thought I would have a full department."

"You asked Tseng to lie to us, sir." There's no reproach in Rude's tone.

"Your reactions had to be genuine." Rufus's smile is thin. "Not all of you are ... were ... good actors. It's not exactly a job requirement."

Rude nods.

"You couldn't know about Veld," Rufus continues. "And you couldn't hate Tseng for killing him, as far as you knew anyway. Yes, I asked him to lie to you."

There's a long pause, and then Rude says, "I understand, sir." Rufus hopes he does.

They don't discuss it any further.

The next morning, Rufus meets with the executives in Junon. It's extremely short notice, because he isn't sure until after breakfast that he's up to it, and that's inconsiderate of him but the circumstances are extraordinary.

He doesn't even try to walk into the conference room; the doctor has secured a motorized wheelchair for him, and he uses that instead. Rude holds the door open for him. Everyone rises when he enters, and there are some shocked expressions, no doubt at how profoundly injured he looks.

Then they applaud him. This takes Rufus by surprise, and when the clapping dies down, he asks, "What was that for?"

"You saved us all, Mr. President," says Hardaway, from Urban Development.

Hobbes, from Space Development, adds, "And you're alive, sir."

Rufus lays his hands on the table, warm inside from that last, despite knowing that not everyone in this room is actually happy to see him alive and possibly Hobbes is in that number. "Did I?" he asks. "Save us all, I mean. That's one of the things on the agenda." He gestures to his new secretary, picked at random out of the Junon pool only half an hour earlier, to distribute copies of the agenda. "I know this was short notice, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you for coming."

The first thing Rufus does is appoint acting heads of all the critical departments, since all of the actual department heads are either missing or confirmed dead. This, like the selection of his new secretary, is done with no premeditation or preparation, as he'd been unable to discover ahead of time who was going to attend. Only the Science Department is not represented at all; Rufus puts Hobbes over it, since Space Development is the closest approximation, and Space Development is probably going to be downsized anyway.

"These are interim, temporary positions," Rufus tells them. "I'll make permanent decisions within the next few weeks." Right now, he needs organization and hierarchy more than anything else.

After that, they move through the agenda quickly enough. Rufus fills in the executives on all of the pertinent, known information his Turks have discovered, and then assigns them tasks. Put together an engineering team to analyze the damage done to Midgar. Assess SOLDIER. Find out what happened to AVALANCHE, and Sephiroth. Find out what happened to Meteor. Inventory the Mako reactors, see what kind of shape they are all in. He orders Hardaway to identify and appoint a coordinator for the company disaster recovery plan by the end of the day. The list is long, but most of the items are just the assignment of a problem to one of the departments, which requires very little time; it would be unreasonable for Rufus to expect feedback or meaningful contributions from any of them right now.

That doesn't mean they necessarily have none. Kyter, now in charge of Public Safety Maintenance, has already taken stock of the Junon army outpost and SOLDIER detachment, and is fully prepared to do the same with other Shinra installations over the next two weeks. Hobbes took the liberty of organizing a team of technicians and physical scientists to ascertain Meteor's fate, the day after Meteorfall. They're supposed to leave this afternoon. Hardaway saw a report yesterday about the Junon reactor, to the effect that there was only slight damage from Meteor and it is already under repair. She promises to have a copy of the report sent to Rufus an hour after the meeting closes.

Rufus is pleased. "The worst is behind us," he tells the executives. "Remember that."

The meeting breaks up, and all is not right in the world (by a long shot), but as long as the Shinra corporate machine is humming Rufus knows it soon will be.

* * *

Reno comes to roost in Junon before a week is out. He's found a dozen more executives and pointed them toward Junon, although four turned in resignations rather than rejoin the company. Rufus reads the letters that Reno brings him, and says, "Let them go." Reno is visibly disappointed.

The Turk also brings a few personal items from the Shinra Tower. "Thought you might want these," he says, unwrapping a box to reveal two urns and a framed photograph.

Rufus touches the picture; a few scratches mar the frame, but it is otherwise undamaged. "Thank you," he says, and he must speak around the knot in his throat.

He more than half-expects Reno to say something more: to ask him, _"Why'd you do it, Rufus?"_ or something equally insolent. Rufus isn't sure how he'll respond to that, hopes Reno doesn't ask it, but when Reno leaves shortly thereafter without dropping the question Rufus is weirdly disappointed. A day passes, then two. Rufus is sure that Rude called Reno, and he decides that probably that's the reason Reno doesn't ask. Still, he would have expected Reno to want to hear it directly from the President.

The medical resources in Junon are much more comprehensive than the facilities in Kalm, and a physical therapist comes to the Presidential suite every evening. Reno is there to keep an eye on things, and one evening when the therapist has just left and Reno is about to leave too, Rufus stops him. "Wait."

Reno stops, and waits, but Rufus finds that his words have deserted him. After a moment, Reno says, "Need somethin' sir?"

"Do you hate me?" asks Rufus, which is not precisely what he wanted to say but that's what comes out his mouth.

"Naw." Reno leans against the wall, near the door. "Did for a while. Got over it." He sniffs. "Was mad for a while. Got over that, too." Then he gives Rufus a shrewd look and adds, "Wish you coulda trusted Rude an' me, yo."

"It was better this way."

Reno grins, and it's an easy, genuine grin that makes Rufus smile a bit himself. "Yeah," says Reno. "Maybe."

* * *

Rufus is soon able to stand on his own and do some hobbling about, and gradually he grows stronger. His bones hurt, _oh_ do they hurt, but the pain diminishes and his balance improves. The rasp in his voice goes away. The bandages start to come off of the least-burned parts of his skin; the scars are blotchy red, but the doctor is nevertheless pleased by the clean way the burns have healed.

All of the Mako reactors that are outside of Midgar (and which weren't destroyed previously) are in good condition and still operating. However, demonstrations are staged outside of them every day. Word soon comes to Rufus that the common folk have gotten it into their heads that the Mako itself somehow saved them. That's ridiculous of course, and Rufus has what's left of the army posted outside the reactors. A lot of soldiers - and more than a few SOLDIERs - have deserted, but there are still enough left to protect the reactors.

The Science Department, what remains of it, still doesn't know what that business with the Mako was about, but it confirms that Meteor disintegrated over Midgar. Midgar is covered in it, actually, with more spread across the land surrounding the city, in the form of dust and pebbles, and chunks up to about fist-size. Thousands of refugees are camped under the plate, and Hardaway thinks Shinra should do something about that.

"The city is definitely not safe," she tells the President. "We need to relocate them somewhere else."

"There _is_ nowhere else," says Rufus. By now he's seen photos and video of the ruined city. The great city, _his_ city. The center of Shinra and of civilization itself. Dust-covered, gray, deserted. Dead. There's a tightness in his throat, and he covers it with irritation. "They'll have to relocate themselves."

At night, Rufus dreams. Of the Mako Cannon, and WEAPON. Of Midgar, the plate smashed and askew. Of choking and dying while flames dance across the walls. He takes to drinking himself to sleep once more, because nobody can stop him now and because it helps to numb his dreams.

Finally, Tseng comes to Junon. He brings with him the last of the company records and another group of misplaced Shinra executives and managers.

He also brings disturbing stories, of people falling ill in the area around Midgar. It's Meteor-sickness, some say. Mako-sickness, say others, although according to Tseng it looks nothing like Mako poisoning. "They get sick," Tseng says, "and there are bruises." Sometimes the bruises become covered in some kind of fluid or pus.

Rufus sends a message to Hobbes to get the Science Department on it. Then he says to Tseng, "I missed you." They're in the conference room at the top of the Junon office, and the windows overlook the sea; Rufus rests wearily in the wheelchair that he hopes to soon abandon.

Tseng's expression softens. "Sir," he says. "I came back as quickly as I could."

"I know." Rufus can't stop looking at him, still marveling that he's alive. "Have you found Reeve?"

"Not yet." He's found rumors of Reeve, places where Reeve has been, but the man himself has gone so far underground that even a Turk will need time to dig him out. "I'm going to fly out tomorrow to keep looking. I'll leave Reno and Elena here."

_No. You stay._ Rufus nods. "Perhaps we should hire more Turks. I suppose Veld is not interested in coming back."

A tiny smile touches Tseng's lips. "He thought you'd say that. He wanted me to tell you that if you ask, he'll return. He's still a Turk."

Rufus gives that the due consideration it deserves, but in the end he says, "No. Let him have his life." Then he looks at Tseng, and wonders if _this_ Turk would like to have his own life, too. Tseng would never admit it if he did, and if Rufus were to ask he would be insulted. So Rufus doesn't ask ... but he wonders.

Then he says, "If I ask, would you kiss me?"

Tseng's expression does not change. "Sir," he says, "you're the President."

"Yes." And the world is no longer ending. Rufus looks away, toward the sun setting across the sea. "Keep me informed. Find Reeve."

That night, Rufus dreams of his mother. She's wearing a beautiful dress of vivid green silk, and they're at a party. Rufus chases her through the crowd, calling out to her, but she does not hear him. When he catches up to her she turns around, and her face is gray and broken.

* * *

There are confirmed deaths from this Meteor-sickness. One, then a dozen, then fifty, and what had originally seemed to Rufus to be a curiosity turns into something alarming. The Science Department says it is not contagious, but it certainly seems to be to Rufus, as it is spreading amongst the refugees under the Midgar plate. A few have come down with it in Kalm.

The news comes to Rufus in a report, but it also slinks through the company in rumor form. It merges with the protests that are still staged, every day, at the company Mako reactors around the world, and together these things mutate into something far darker. _Shinra did this. Shinra brought Meteor, and Shinra Mako reactors brought this disease._

Rufus first learns these ugly rumors when the disaster recovery coordinator fails to meet a deadline, and Hardaway attempts to excuse the lapse by citing personnel losses. "What losses?" says Rufus, and Hardaway explains that her department has lost fourteen employees in the past three days.

When Rufus asks why people would quit the company, she relates the rumors to him; fury lights sparks across his vision, and he says something unfortunate and slams down the phone. Then he sweeps half the paperwork and items off his desk, and stops there only because he's not yet fully recovered.

Most of the fury, when it has faded some and he has a moment to reflect, comes from the fact that the company is circling the rim of a death spiral. Revenues are way down, and not just because of the crisis that Meteor punched into the world economy; people are removing themselves from the Shinra power grid every day. This story about how Mako saved the world - another stupid rumor - has gained a lot of traction, and people who happily paid for Mako power for decades now want nothing to do with it.

If the spiral starts, reduced revenue will lead to cuts in personnel, which would result in less capacity to provide services and enforce Shinra's monopoly, which in turn will feed back into reduced revenue. Shinra is on the lip of this whirlpool already. All Rufus needs, really, is for people to start jumping ship _before_ their paychecks are endangered.

He's not even completely well, not yet confident enough to leave the wheelchair at the hotel, or even to move out of the hotel and back into the Junon condo. He can only work for a few hours at a time before he becomes fatigued. Rufus just doesn't have the strength or energy to deal with this ... and yet he must. Somehow, he must.

Elena takes him back to the hotel that evening, and Rufus asks her about these rumors. She hesitates before answering, and then tells him what she's overheard. It's similar to what Hardaway said earlier, but Elena adds, "I think you should visit Midgar, sir."

"Why?" asks Rufus bitterly. "Midgar is a ruin."

"I think that's why you should go. You should see it for yourself."

Rufus immediately rejects this, but later that evening when he's sipping his bourbon the idea returns, unbidden. The images he's seen of Midgar are bad enough; he doesn't really want to see it in person. But maybe he should anyway. He'd needed to see his father's body, after Sephiroth killed him. Perhaps he needs to see Midgar's corpse for the same reasons.

The next morning he tells Elena that he wants to visit Midgar. His secretary cancels his appointments, and before lunch time he's on a chopper.

* * *

Even from a distance Midgar looks different. The long barrel of the Mako Cannon, resting on the plate, is visible as soon as the city is; the weapon gives the city an air of self-confidence, surety, a soldier at rest but with gun at the ready. As the chopper closes the distance, though, the damage comes into view: smashed buildings, the plate tilted in Sector Five, the gaping broken windows of the Shinra Tower. Some of the haze has lifted from the city, and the sunlight is not kind. No life is visible on the plate from the air.

Rufus has the chopper circle a few times. He forces himself to look at it; each circuit hammers Midgar's destruction deeper into his mind.

There _is_ life in the ruin, he sees the third time around. It's on the ground, where the ground is visible between the gaps in the plate. The refugees. They can hear and see the chopper, and they look up at him.

"Get lower," Rufus tells the pilot, and points.

The slums have always been a series of shanty towns, but the wall that kept the city self-contained is broken, and it's clear that the refugees are starting to move out from under the plate. Flimsy dwellings, erected of corrugated metal and wreckage, extend out from the plate's shadow toward the east. It brings to Rufus's mind the dim memory of amoebae, reaching.

Someone down there throws something at the helicopter. The projectile comes nowhere near the chopper, and the action is not repeated. Rufus has seen enough, and he tells the pilot to return to Junon.

The image of Midgar replays itself over and over during the flight: the gray dust, the smashed buildings, the broken plate. The people, moving about like ants beneath a giant's corpse. The landscape around Midgar is the same wasteland it has been for years, and Rufus saw few people on the roads. What are all those refugees eating? He's never asked, and doesn't know.

Back in Junon, Rufus calls a meeting with Hardaway to find out. "A few charities are shipping in supplies," she tells him, "and taking people out as quickly as they can. The situation is dire, though. There really just isn't enough food, and especially not enough clean water. Some of them have died, and more are going to die. There are too many of them, still tens of thousands of people, maybe up to a hundred thousand, and not enough resources to move them."

The problem weighs on Rufus the rest of the evening, and the day following. Midgar was _his_ city. Those were _his_ people. They still are. Rufus has never felt that it to be wise to expend company resources to help specific people; his philosophy was always that the prosperity of Shinra would be the prosperity of the world. Times are radically different now, though. He can put Shinra back together in Junon, but everyone who can't escape Midgar is likely to be dead long before the company can address the ruined city from a business perspective.

What is needed now is not a business perspective, obviously, but Rufus nevertheless has to put some hard thought into it before reaching a decision.

Two days after his visit to Midgar, he again summons Hardaway. "What needs to be done about the Midgar refugees?" he asks.

Hardaway has the outlines of a plan. "The refugees are already starting to build shelters outside of Midgar," she tells Rufus. "I think it would be best to help them."

* * *

The Shinra employees in Junon quickly begin to refer to the new project as "the Midgar edge city," and before too many days that becomes shortened to "Edge." Rufus orders that Shinra continue to focus mainly on the company disaster recovery plan, but makes sure that all personnel are aware of the new city project. He thinks it will improve morale, and that seems to work. Resignations and disappearances slow to a trickle.

The Turks continue to report in about the protests. They are worldwide, now, taking place even in locations that have no reactors. Reno and Rude infiltrate one of the groups organizing the protests in Kalm, and this enables them to prepare a detailed analysis of the movement.

Rufus reads their report the evening after they turn it in, his fury growing with every sentence. The protesters are joined by a common belief that Mako is, in some manner, alive. Many, but not all, of them think that Mako is actually the Lifestream of fairy tale, and that it emerged of its own accord to save the Planet from Meteor. The Shinra Corporation, by this reasoning, has been dealing very poorly with the Lifestream, and still is by running Mako reactors. The report states that the demonstrators believe that Shinra should shut down every reactor and try to make amends for what it has done to the Planet.

When he's finished reading, Rufus snaps the report closed and flings it across the room. Ludicrous. Ludicrous! Shut down the reactors! They may as well demand that Rufus completely disband his company. He has no doubt that Shinra's competitors would like that very much!

There was no mention of who is behind this movement in the report. Rufus calms himself, and then calls Reno and instructs him to uncover that information. "Someone is feeding them this line," Rufus says. "They didn't get that idea from nowhere."

"Tseng's already on it, sir," Reno tells him, and this is comforting. Of course Tseng would have already figured out what was needed next.

Rufus is getting stronger by the day. The physical therapist expresses great optimism about his recovery. All of the bandages are off, now, and the angry scars are starting to fade. The hair on the burned parts of Rufus's scalp begins to grow back. It itches.

* * *

Construction on Edge commences, and Rufus ensures that no one left in Midgar is ignorant of the fact that Shinra is coming to their rescue. All of the equipment used in the construction is branded with the Shinra logo, even if it has to be applied with paper and tape. All of the workers wear the Shinra logo on their clothes, or on hats.

Wells are drilled first, to provide needed water, and food is shipped in from Junon. The shanties are dismantled, and reassembled with better workmanship to make them more sturdy as temporary housing. The area where Edge is to be located is surveyed, and the first roads laid down.

At first everything seems to go quite well, with the Midgar refugees working alongside the Shinra employees to stabilize their situation, but then the demonstrations start. Rufus is incensed when Reno comes to the hotel suite and submits a report on the first protests, so furious that he loses his balance and falls to the floor. He isn't usually in a lot of pain these days, but falling on his face aggravates his not-fully-healed wounds and leaves him in agony.

"Those _ungrateful wretches!"_ he screams, as Reno helps him up, and then back into his wheelchair. "How fucking _dare they!_ How dare they!" It hurts so much, so much, but not enough to quash his rage.

"I dunno, sir," says Reno. He takes an empty tumbler from a nearby table and puts it into Rufus's hand, and , and Rufus immediately smashes it against the far wall. "There is one thin' I know, though. This Meteor-sickness, or whatever. It's killin' a lot of 'em."

"They _ought_ to die," says Rufus viciously. "I should never have tried to help them!"

This earns him a disappointed frown from Reno. "I've seen it, sir," says the Turk. "Nobody who ain't done nothin' oughta die that way, yeah?"

This means a lot coming from Reno, and it gives Rufus pause. "Hand me my PHS."

He calls Hobbes, to get an update on the progress of this disease. The Science Department maintains that the disease is not contagious, but it still has no idea what causes it. About one in fifty of the Midgar refugees has it. There have been reports of it from around the world, although it is less common elsewhere, with one or two cases per city in most instances. It sometimes progresses quickly, and sometimes slowly, but no treatment does more than delay death.

Hobbes has some people in Midgar right now, studying the disease amongst the refugees, and Rufus orders him to give his department's efforts a higher profile. "This would be a lot easier," says Hobbes, "if we still had access to Hojo's facilities in the Tower."

"Yes, well, we don't," says Rufus. "Do whatever you can to recreate them here in Junon."

"Does that include Hojo's experimental facilities?"

Rufus hesitates. "Don't use humans who haven't yet been infected," he says, after thinking about it a little. People who are infected are doomed, apparently, so it seems okay to him to allow experimentation on them if it means finding a treatment.

"That's going to make it harder to find the causative agent, sir," says Hobbes.

"I know, but don't disobey me on this." Then something occurs to Rufus. "Do you think this is something of Hojo's?" he asks. "Something that escaped confinement when Meteor hit the Tower?"

"It's possible. If we had access to Hojo's records, we could check."

Rufus could call Hardaway and have the disaster recovery coordinator prioritize Hojo's records, but doesn't; that would be stupid. The re-establishment of Shinra security and business ties is more important. "We'll get to it in a few weeks," he tells Hobbes. "Do what you can until then."

He's exhausted when he hangs up with Hobbes, and he asks Reno to help him get to bed. It's early afternoon; he intends to take an hour nap and then get back up. "Bring me a glass of whiskey," he asks when he's settled.

Instead of doing that, Reno sits down on the edge of the bed, and he looks like he has something to say but he pauses a long time before saying anything. "I got t'ask you," he says eventually. "Why didn't you trust me an' Rude?"

This. Rufus is relieved that it's finally come. "I would have thought that Rude would tell you. We talked about it once."

"Yeah, he did, but ..." Reno breaks off, narrows his eyes, and then reaches out and touches the side of Rufus's jaw. "Lift your chin a sec, sir."

"What is it?" Rufus tilts up his chin, expecting that maybe some of his lunch is still there somehow. Reno rubs the flesh on the side of Rufus's neck with his thumb, then licks his thumb and rubs again.

"Is it gone?" asks Rufus.

"You hit yourself here?" Reno rubs again with his thumb. "When you fell, maybe?"

The spot is painless, and Rufus shakes his head. "I don't think so."

Reno stands. "It's prob'ly nothin'," he says, but his eyes are wide and pensive. "I'm gonna call a doc up here anyway. Just t'check, an' be sure. It's prob'ly nothin', though."


	15. Geostigma

There are only a few small marks: just above Rufus's left wrist, on his right biceps, the place on the side of his neck that Reno noticed. They look like deep bruises, a smear of blue below the skin, although they are not painful to the touch. Had Rufus spotted them first, he would have been only mildly curious as to how he'd injured himself.

The doctor, however, is grim. "I'm sorry, President Shinra," she says.

Reno is ashen, but Rufus is not upset. He's too numb at this point for that. He stares at his wrist, unable to comprehend how a benign-looking bruise can be a death sentence. He's had a thousand bruises in his life; this one doesn't even look that serious.

"There are treatments in development," the doctor is saying. Her voice comes to Rufus as though from far away. They'd moved into the front room of the Presidential suite for the examination, and the sun is beginning to set over the water; the orange light makes everything look a little strange, a little hellish. "President Shinra, we'll do everything in our power to help you."

"But there's no cure," says Rufus, trying to understand it. He'd understood it fine three hours ago, when he'd thought it was someone else's disease. "It's fatal."

The doctor hesitates, and says, "At this time, there is no known cure, but we've been working on it since it emerged. There are already promising treatments."

"But there's no cure," says Rufus again, and there's a shrill note in his voice this time that he doesn't like.

The shocked numbness is receding, and Rufus knows he's going to lose control and start to freak any moment now; Reno notices, and intervenes. "Thanks, doc," says the Turk. "Someone'll call you later t'set up some appointments for the President." The doctor wants to say a few more things, but Reno insists that Rufus has other business now and gets her out the door.

He stays at the door once she's gone, and looks at the young President. Rufus is still staring at his wrist like he's never seen it before, and Reno can hardly blame him. There's a scream in Reno's belly, in his throat; he can't give it voice.

He says, "Sir, sometimes this ... it sometimes takes a while t' ... t'progress. You ain't gonna die t'morrow." He's not sure who he's trying to convince. "You ain't gonna die at all."

"Call Hardaway," says Rufus, and he sounds calm, not at all panicked, and that's more alarming than the alternative would have been. "Have her prioritize Hojo's records for Hobbes."

"Yes, sir," says Reno, and then, again, "You ain't gonna die."

Rufus lets his hand drop to the arm of his chair. "Just call Hardaway for me."

Reno agrees and does so, and he also calls Tseng. This is something Tseng should know immediately. Rufus listens to Reno's end of the calls, just staring at the mark on his wrist and giving no sign that he actually hears any of it.

After a few minutes, though, Rufus asks for his PHS and calls his secretary, to have all of his appointments canceled for at least the next two days. Company business, so important to him this morning, is the last thing he wants to deal with now. This disease is something that happens to _other_ people, to refugees living in squalor and misery, like cholera or dysentery. Cholera doesn't happen to people like Rufus.

The shock is wearing off, making way for the tight, icy hand of despair wrapping around the pit of Rufus's throat, but Rufus can't let that show in front of anyone else. Not even his Turks can know how this has affected him. Reno seems to want to stick around, so Rufus sends him away. "You may go now," Rufus tells him, after he hangs up with his secretary.

Reno looks dubious and argues a little, but Rufus isn't in the mood and screams at him to _fucking leave._ So Reno leaves, and he says, "I'll be downstairs, yo, call me if you need me," as he's going out the door, and the expression on his face when he says it almost cracks Rufus's composure. But then he's gone, and Rufus can break down in peace.

How could this happen? _How could this happen?_ After Sephiroth, after Meteor. After all of it. How could this happen, and how could it happen _now?_ Rufus sits in the wheelchair he still sometimes needs because of his WEAPON injuries, and he's trembling and he can't even name why because there are so many reasons. _How could this happen?_

He looks again at the mark on his wrist. It's so small. It doesn't even hurt. _How could this happen?_

The sheer absurdity of it suddenly overwhelms Rufus, and he starts to laugh. The mark doesn't even hurt! He laughs long enough to shake his not-quite-healed bones, long enough for tears to stream down his face in lieu of the tears he might cry if he were anyone else. How could a simple bruise, with no pain behind it, be so cruel? It's so ridiculous! Rufus coughs a little between peals of mad laughter, and slumps over the arm of his chair.

* * *

With all of his appointments canceled, Rufus has the next day free to rearrange the company. This someone-else's disease is now a top priority. Rufus can't allow anyone else to know the reason, of course, so he couches all of his orders in humanitarian terms. _People are suffering,_ and _Shinra is the only organization that can help them,_ and _This is what we do, after all._ It would be better if the company were not shattered, but if wishes were chocobo and all of that. His head is clearer, now, after sleeping on the horror, but that laughter still seems to lurk somewhere, in the depths of his chest.

He should still be able to manage the company well enough. It's easy to hide his condition, after all; his normal clothing conceals the bruise on his wrist, and buttoning the collar of his shirt and putting on a tie covers the one on his neck. He was already conducting a lot of business by phone anyway, and everyone expects him to use a wheelchair at this point so any ... physical deterioration should be excusable.

Rufus would prefer not to think about that, but he must, and so he does.

He sees the doctor that afternoon, and she briefs him on the treatments that are in development right now. Mainly drug cocktails and experimental magic but also a therapy that involves surgical removal of the bruises. "Since one of your lesions is on your throat," she tells Rufus, "that may not be a good option for you once it spreads, so if you want to consider that, we should do it soon."

"Thank you," he tells her, and she leaves to start preparations for treatment.

Tseng, who brought the doctor up to the suite, remains behind. He doesn't say anything, just stands there quietly near the door, and Rufus knows what the Turk wants to say so he doesn't invite it. He needs no pity from anyone.

"I want airtight security on this," Rufus says instead.

"Elena is on it," says Tseng. "It won't get out." Rufus nods. He doesn't need to ask how Elena will assure that.

Then Tseng goes ahead and says what Rufus doesn't want to hear. "Sir, if you need help with anything, we're here for you."

Rufus understands, and immediately rejects it. "That won't be necessary," he tells the Turk.

"If it becomes necessary."

"It _won't,"_ says Rufus, and his voice is starting to rise and he's losing his precious grip on control. "I won't have you _nursemaiding_ me."

Tseng looks like he's going to say more, but then changes the subject, although not to good news. Elena has reported from the Gold Saucer that Dio is looking to build a gas-fired power plant, big enough to cover all of the Saucer's power needs. It seems impossible that he will continue to purchase power from the Corel reactor after it is completed. Elena has not spoken to him, but she thinks it's a business decision; too many people are starting to believe this Lifestream story, and they don't want to vacation at the Saucer so long as it is running on Mako power.

The _Lifestream. Again._ It's unbelievable that people – rational adults – would keep turning back to nursery rhymes like this, but in light of that, Dio's choices are easy enough for Rufus to understand. He thinks, for a moment, whether he wants to push this. Shinra still has power in its relationship with the Saucer, and Rufus could probably find a way to force Dio to back off the gas generator plan. Then the despair takes over; what does it matter, ultimately?

"It's fine," says Rufus, which is an answer that clearly takes Tseng by surprise. "Let him do it."

"Sir ..." said Tseng at first, but he cuts himself off. "Yes, sir," he says. "We'll keep an eye on it."

Rufus nods, and asks for more information about the protests. They've lost no steam, taking place at every Mako reactor still operable, and in every city center, every day, like clockwork. The employees at the reactors sometimes have difficulty getting to work, and some of them have quit; Tseng thinks that more will quit over time. This, too, disappears into the black despair that fills Rufus, and he just stares at the floor.

There's no cure, after all. He will receive the best and most promising treatments, but even the best and most promising are not cures. The disease will stay with him, and whether quickly or slowly it will progress, and eventually it will consume him. He pushes up his sleeve to look at the tiny bruise above his wrist. It's so small, so innocuous.

"Sir," says Tseng, and he kneels in front of Rufus in the President's field of view; Rufus realizes that he stopped listening to the Turk's report at least a minute ago. "You'll beat this."

"Will I."

"Yes," and Tseng's voice brims with conviction. "Nothing has ever defeated you."

Rufus almost laughs, almost says that Meteor defeated him quite handily, but Tseng doesn't need to hear that so he refrains. "I'm not defeated yet," he says instead, a hopeful sentiment that he doesn't really feel.

"You didn't hear what I said, did you, sir? About Cosmo Canyon."

"No." Rufus recalls nothing about that.

It's Cosmo Canyon, Tseng thinks, that is the source of the rumor that Mako is the same as the Lifestream. The other major possibility is AVALANCHE or their survivors, but the Turks have not been able to track any of them down so the assumption right now is that none of them survived Meteor.

Neither Rufus nor his father was ever much interested in the Canyon, a desolate place perched among the rocks to the south of Nibelheim. The scholars there – part scientist and part shaman – keep to themselves and bother no one, and Rufus has never had a need to interfere in their business. He knows that his father had found Red XIII there, but he doesn't think the elder Shinra had anything else to do with the Canyon.

"I'd like to know their rationale," says Rufus, idly rubbing the mark on his wrist. "Could you invite someone to visit?"

"Of course," says Tseng. He rises to leave.

* * *

Treatment begins the following day. The first course is a relatively benign mix of antibiotics and immune boosters, to bolster his own body's defenses. The doctor encourages him to eat more, and to eat more fresh and healthy food; it's been observed that the disease takes a more virulent course with those who lack access to sufficient fresh food. Rufus decides not to tell her about the whiskey. The last thing he needs right now is another medical lecture about it.

Hojo's records are located, and Hobbes sets a team to work on them. His preliminary report is that this sickness wasn't one of Hojo's primary projects, as all of those related to Jenova and the Cetra. It may have been a side thing, so no firm conclusions are drawn, but there is no quick answer and certainly no cure to be had at this time.

It's nothing Rufus doesn't expect at this point. He needs three glasses of bourbon that night before he can make it to sleep.

Work on Edge has slowed due to the demonstrations there, but it continues. The city planners in Urban Development have designed Edge around a compact core laid out on a modified grid pattern, with wide boulevards connecting civic centers. Rufus takes a weary afternoon to look over the renderings, sketches of people walking under broad shade trees with a sort of modified Shinra Tower in the background, and he imagines what it might be like when the town is finished. The roads are going down first, and then the first residential district will be built, so that the refugees can become residents. The first civic center will be next, then the first commercial district. It's expected that construction will continue in a more organic fashion after that.

Will Rufus live to see it? It's bleak that he has to ask himself that question.

The next course of treatment is a potent blend of potions and healing materia. The doctor brings in an assistant to deliver the magic, and Elena supervises the proceedings; the assistant seems nervous, and Rufus assumes that Elena has threatened his life if he breathes a word about his patient. This treatment, the doctor assures Rufus, will extend his life considerably, so her plan is to administer it three times per week. Despite the fact that all of the magic is beneficial in nature, Rufus is wrung out by the time all of it has been run through him, and he needs to sleep for a few hours afterward.

Two days later, a visitor is brought to Rufus at Junon. Rufus has just finished a conference call with the acting department directors when Rude escorts a man into the hotel suite's front room. The man looks angry and resentful; Rude introduces him as one Elder Hargo, of Cosmo Canyon.

"Ahhh," says Rufus. He's seated in his wheelchair and he doesn't try to stand up. "Welcome to Junon. I hope you had an uneventful trip."

"I want you to know up front that I don't appreciate being kidnapped," says Hargo.

Oh, shit. Rufus immediately knows what happened; he had genuinely intended for the Turks to extend a friendly invitation, not abduct anyone, but he hadn't made that clear. He wonders how to defuse this. "I was just about to have lunch. Would you like to join me?"

"I'd like to go home, if that's all right."

There's no way Rufus is going to admit that he didn't intend for this to happen. He has Rude wheel him into the suite's dining room, where one of the hotel staff is laying out lunch. "Please bring another plate for my guest," says Rufus.

Hargo drops into a chair across the table from Rufus. "I don't need lunch," he says.

"Nonsense. Everyone needs lunch." Rufus laces his fingers in his lap, as it would be rude to start eating before his companion has a plate. "I apologize for the ... abruptness of the invitation I extended to you, but you will be free to leave as soon as you've heard me out. Please, join me for lunch. If you want to go at the end, I will have Rude take you back."

"Very well. But you may as well have your man keep the helicopter running because nothing you can say will make me want to stay here."

Rufus tries to engage in small talk at first, but Hargo just absolutely refuses to cooperate so he quickly abandons that. Once a plate has been set in front of the elder and lunch has been served, Rufus decides to get to the point. "I've heard some rumors lately," he says, "about the Lifestream and about Mako energy." There's no reason for Hargo to know that this isn't the first time Rufus has encountered the Lifestream rumor.

"I'm sure you have." Hargo is practically attacking his food, eating it in the most hostile fashion Rufus has ever seen.

"You know some things about the Lifestream, don't you?"

Hargo eyes Rufus. "Not as much as some, but yes. I've been studying it for many years."

"You've been studying Mako," corrects Rufus.

"Mako is the name _you_ gave it. Maybe you thought it would be bad for business to tell people you were selling them Lifestream power, eh?" He takes a bite of meat, and says, "Come on, Shinra. Say your piece so I can get home."

Rufus chooses his words carefully. "I want to learn about the Lifestream," he says. "I want to know why you think it exists, and why you think it's another word for Mako."

Hargo snorts. "You. You want to learn about the Lifestream."

"If you're willing to teach me."

"Hah."

"It's your choice," says Rufus. "But I'm here and I want to listen to you. If you don't want that, then you may leave as soon as you're finished with your meal."

They eat in silence for a few minutes, before Hargo says, with somewhat less hostility, "Is this really something you want to know?"

"I wouldn't be asking you if it weren't."

"I see." A long pause, and then Hargo says, "Let me ask you something in turn, then. Did you once have a pet chocobo?"

The question startles Rufus. "Yes," he says, seeing no reason to lie. "Her name was Sunny." He suddenly recalls that the Turks claimed to have sent Sunny to Cosmo Canyon. He's always half-suspected that this had been a kind lie, but it thrills him to think that they really did.

Hargo tone has softened somewhat when he says, "Did you get tired of her?"

"I just outgrew her. As I got older, business came first." Hargo has no need to know the details of how Sunny came to leave the stable outside Midgar, so Rufus lies, "The stable that raised her needed the space for competing birds, and she'd earned a good retirement and someone to love her."

"She was a damned fine chocobo," says Hargo. "All the children of the Canyon did love her, but she always looked to me like she was waiting for someone else to come see her." He tears apart a roll and butters it.

It bothers Rufus to think that Sunny had been unhappy in the Canyon, watching always for a master who would never visit her again. "She's passed, then?"

"Last year," says Hargo, and a complex mix of feelings runs through Rufus to think that he _just_ missed being able to see her. There's a certain emptiness in his belly now, at the memory of her greeting warks.

"I hope she made someone happy," he says, when he trusts his voice.

"I think she did." Elder Hargo bites into the roll, thoughtfully. Then he says, "I'll teach you the study of planet life, if that's what you want."

_Is_ that what Rufus wants? He's never heard that term before. "Yes," he says. "That's what I want."

* * *

For a while, the marks on Rufus's wrist and throat remain as they are, but one day when he looks at them he's certain that they've started to grow.

The doctor agrees. Rufus continues to receive intensive materia therapy, but the doctor adds an injection of some drug to the mix. It's experimental, but Rufus consents to it because why not? The magic still wearies him, but he notices no particular side-effects from the injections. Every morning the doctor visits, checks his vital signs, examines the lesions, and quizzes him on how he's felt and how he's been eating. If the doctor notices the smell of bourbon on him, she doesn't say anything.

In a profound irony, Rufus continues to get stronger as time passes. He can spend more time out of the wheelchair every day, and with care he could probably do without it altogether now. He continues to use it, though, ensuring that others in the company see him in it whenever he conducts in-person meetings. He'd rather be thought to be permanently crippled by his WEAPON injuries than for someone to figure out that he has this disease as it develops. Nevertheless, he walks everywhere when it is just himself and the Turks.

The disease. The doctor calls it progressive deep tissue necrosis, but the news comes to Rufus that some people have started to call it the star scar syndrome, and others call it geostigma. The story that it is a punishment from Gaia, that the planet itself has inflicted it purposefully on humankind, begins to spread. It is revenge for the use of Mako power, they say.

Rufus asks Elder Hargo if he believes this. "No," is Hargo's opinion. "The Lifestream is not vengeful, and it does not hate us. How could it? We are a part of it. I don't know why we see the stigma today, but the Lifestream is not the cause of it."

Hargo is a patient teacher once his anger subsides. He wants to take Rufus outside Junon, to the forest where the wild things grow, but Rufus doesn't have time for that kind of nonsense. Hargo makes the trip alone, and returns with a small bag of forest soil, rich and dark.

"The great web of life," says Hargo, spreading the dirt across the young President's table and offering a magnifying glass.

Rufus takes the glass, and asks, "What am I supposed to see?" but it becomes immediately apparent that he's supposed to see the tiny creatures that live in the soil. Miniscule things, they flee from the light, and the soil must be prodded to keep them in view. Minute silvery insects that spring away when touched, worms smaller than Rufus would have thought possible, and here there is a tiny millipede.

It's reminiscent of when Rufus would look into the water with a microscope; he had never realized that tiny creatures live in the soil the way they live in water, although it makes sense now that he's thought about it. Hargo assures Rufus that there are yet more animals that the hand glass can't magnify enough to see.

"These creatures are born, live, mate, and die in such numbers as to be unimaginable," Hargo tells him. "Each one has a life that is meaningful in its own way. Were they to disappear tomorrow, our lives would soon cease."

"How do you figure?" asks Rufus, sitting back up in his wheelchair. His coffee table is a mess now, but he's too tired from the materia treatment earlier in the day to care. He examines a diminutive creature crawling across his fingernail, so small he doubts he would notice it if it weren't moving.

It's the Lifestream, claims Hargo. "The Lifestream is integral to life, and life is integral to the Lifestream. These creatures live in a continual churn of life and death and birth and life, born from the Lifestream and generating Lifestream. Larger organisms, like plants and like humans, depend on these traces of Lifestream to live and grow. Without these creatures, everything would cease."

Rufus is not convinced, and Hargo picks up on it. "You've a skeptical mind," says the elder. "That's both good and bad. Some skepticism is good, it makes you rigorous. Too much makes you closed-minded."

"I don't think I'm closed-minded," says Rufus. "I just need evidence." Preferably evidence that doesn't involve poking around in the dirt, but he'll take what's available.

"What is Mako, eh?" asks Hargo. "It is energy, yes? It burns those who touch it, and mutates creatures who spend too much time near it. It seems like dangerous stuff!"

"Yes," agreed Rufus.

"Yet it is abundant where there is much life. Tell me, is the Mako creating life, or is life creating the Mako?"

Rufus shakes his head, disappointed. "It's a spurious correlation. There's no connection between the two. It's just that industry tends to destroy the natural world, and industry runs on Mako. So you pump out the Mako and the natural things are bulldozed down. I'm sorry, I just don't see it."

"Hmmm." Hargo stands up and dusts off his hands on his pants. "Someday you will. I promise you this."

* * *

The first time the stigma oozes fluid, it comes from the mark on Rufus's throat. He notices it when he takes off his tie and shirt that evening when he's getting ready for bed; there is a brownish-gray smear of horror on the inside of his white shirt collar.

Rufus is already a little drunk when he makes the discovery, and he starts to laugh a crazed laugh. This just slams home what's happening to him, that he's spending every day with a death sentence spreading inside his body. It makes him want to crawl out of his own skin somehow, to escape the disgusting rot that he knows is developing within the marks. He's seen pictures, now, of people in the final stages of the stigma, and it makes his flesh creep across his bones at the thought of that happening to him.

Reno comes into the bedroom to check on him, and Rufus is just laughing and laughing, too hard to speak. So he turns the collar of the shirt in his hands toward the Turk, showing the gray smear as he just laughs at the absurdity of it.

All the money and power of his failing company are turned toward geostigma research at this point, and Rufus just knows it won't be enough. The fluid marks the arrival of the second stage of the disease, when the body can no longer process the advancing damage and starts to extrude broken-down tissue in short episodes of leakage from the lesions. Rufus didn't notice it happening today, but he knows it will become painful soon; sometimes it becomes so agonizing that people have seizures during the flows.

"Sir," says Reno after a stunned moment, "that don't mean anythin'."

"No?" Rufus puts a hand over his mouth, tries to get his cackling under control so that he can speak. "No? The marks are still small, and they're already oozing crap."

"Yeah, that happens. It don't mean you're gonna die t'morrow or nothin'."

No, not tomorrow, but soon. Rufus takes off his pants, downs the rest of the whiskey in the glass on the bedside table, and then slides under the covers. He stares up at the ceiling. "You may go now," he says, and wipes his eyes as he giggles a few more times before the urge departs.

Reno hesitates a long time, but finally does leave without having to be told a second time.

The next day Rufus calls Hobbes to check on the progress of the research. It's slow going; there is no shortage of volunteers lining up for experimental treatments, but most of them come on board when they are already in the later stages. It's at the point when their lesions are running with fluid constantly that they become desperate enough to seek aid from Shinra. Hobbes needs some relatively healthy people in the early stages, or better yet some uninfected specimens to aid in figuring out what the causative agent actually is.

Rufus again vetoes that. "Nobody is going to be infected with this deliberately," he tells Hobbes, his voice hard.

"Sir, you're tying my hands," says Hobbes. "I'm sure I can find some volunteers who want to help their family or something."

"No. Not even volunteers." Rufus tells him to offer incentives to attract early-stage victims of the disease, but no human is to be purposefully exposed. Hobbes is welcome to use animal subjects, of course, but Hobbes sourly points out that no animals have yet been found that show any sign or symptom.

That's interesting information. Rufus hadn't known that.

The planet itself is the cause of the stigma, is the rumor. Revenge against the humans who tried to destroy it ... or a self-defense retaliation. Lower animals had nothing to do with it, so they wouldn't be subject to that retaliation ...

No. Rufus doesn't believe it. "It doesn't matter," he says. "No one is to be deliberately infected."

"Yes, sir," says Hobbes.

There's an ache in Rufus's left wrist today, beneath the stigma mark, the ache that always lives there in Junon when the weather changes. It's the ache of a bone broken and healed too many times, the ache of a permanently damaged joint that no magic can fix. Now that he's thought of that rumor, that story about the geostigma being the planet's revenge, he wonders, just for a moment, if it could be true. Hojo certainly thought the planet to be, in some way, sapient, capable of defending itself by creating WEAPON. Could it also be capable of creating a disease?

This is stupid, Rufus tells himself. The planet is the planet, and Mako is Mako, and WEAPON was the predictable consequence of monsters bathing in Mako for who-knows-how-long. And during Meteorfall, the Mako ...

Rufus realizes that he has no idea what made the Mako do that during Meterofall, but that he has someone on retainer who might. Rufus asks Reno to summon Elder Hargo, and moves into the wheelchair in the front room of the Presidential suite.

Hargo has been housed in another hotel suite, and arrives in a few minutes. Rufus inquires as to his well-being without caring about the answer, and then gets to the point: "What happened during Meteorfall? Why did the Mako rise out of the ground the way it did?"

"Mako?" Hargo chuckles. "Perhaps it was some kind of reaction to Meteor. Maybe Meteor attracted it somehow!"

"I already thought of that," says Rufus, unfazed by the elder's gentle mockery. "But it isn't attracted to Meteor now, and Meteor is all over Midgar."

"You already know what I'm going to say," says Hargo. "Why did you call me to tell you something you already know?"

Rufus isn't sure; maybe he just wants to hear it out of another person's mouth. "You think the Mako did it with a purpose. What purpose?"

"What indeed? The Lifestream sensed a threat to the very existence of the planet, and moved to neutralize that threat. And it succeeded! Meteor was destroyed and became dust, and here we are, still alive." Hargo takes a seat, and says, "Bugenhagen was our greatest scholar, at Cosmo Canyon. He'd forgotten more about the study of planet life than most of us had ever learned. He wasn't so certain that the Lifestream would preserve humans if it ever moved to act. We've treated the planet very poorly, after all, and we are ultimately unimportant to the web of life."

"Perhaps it didn't," muses Rufus, looking down at his wrist. The smudge there is concealed by his sleeve, but the ache in his bones marks the place. "The stigma ..."

"I told you before. The Lifestream is not a spiteful thing. The geostigma is ... something else. If the Lifestream meant to take us back, it would have simply done so. It would not let us continue, and then infect some of us with a disease. And is there a rhyme or a reason to the infections?" Hargo chuckles. "It's not as if you Shinra are disproportionately affected."

"No," Rufus agrees. "It's not like that at all."

After Hargo has left, Rufus stands and walks over to the window. It's mid-afternoon, and the water in Junon Harbor sparkles like diamonds. Somewhere beneath the waves lies the carcass of WEAPON; Rufus remembers its eyes, the _knowledge_ that lurked somewhere in what passed for the creature's mind. It had played with Junon, learning the capabilities of the Cannon, as if it had been an intelligent entity. Rufus supposes that in a way, it was.

If WEAPON had been the creation of a sentient planet, and WEAPON failed, what else might the planet create to deal with its enemies? Something more powerful yet? Or something insidious?

* * *

There's talk of an organization being constituted within Edge; volunteers are being recruited to help with the construction efforts. Rufus assumes it is an enterprising new company and instructs Hardaway to make contact with it, and perhaps strike a deal with it to outsource some of Shinra's work there. Shinra is still bleeding employees, although at a somewhat slower rate now – all the skittish people are already gone, leaving the most loyal and least likely to jump ship behind. The reduction of personnel makes it harder for the company to maintain schedules, and the intense focus on the stigma research has left the Edge project short of workers. A partner corporation is just what is needed right now.

Hobbes issues a final report on Hojo's research: it is certain now that the stigma is not an escaped side project. An account has been made of all of Hojo's resources and department staff, and there is just no possibility that he was working on this disease in any capacity.

Since it hadn't existed prior to Meteorfall, this reduces the number of possibilities to two: it was brought by Meteor, or it evolved spontaneously at Meteorfall due to ... some factor. Hobbes is working on the hypothesis that the high concentration of Mako in the air during Meteorfall – something the world had never seen before – had something to do with it, and is surveying people with the disease to see if there is some common factor in their Meteorfall experiences. In the report he expresses some regret that so many have already died and their experiences lost, but interviewing the families of the deceased in proxy is his next step.

Rufus leaves the Junon Presidential suite less and less often. His geostigma is spreading relatively slowly, but it has oozed again and his white clothing eagerly shows off the stains. He conducts business over the phone, and occasionally allows a visitor when it seems absolutely necessary, but for the most part he keeps himself secluded. Rumors start to move around the company about it, and it's Reno, the inveterate gossip, who brings the report on that.

"They're startin' to say you're worse off than anyone thought," Reno says one evening. "That you've got somethin' like Mako poisoning."

"I wish I had Mako poisoning," says Rufus. He's sitting on the couch with a stack of files next to him and on the table and in his hand, but his wheelchair is nearby in case of unscheduled visitors. "Mako poisoning is survivable."

"Yeah, well, I don't. You looked weird with your hair burned off, yeah?"

"You'd rather I die than look weird. I see how your priorities are arranged now."

Reno moves a couple of files from the couch to the table so he can sit down next to Rufus. "That ain't what I meant," he says quietly.

Rufus tosses the files in his hand down onto the table. It all seems so pointless. "Don't bother to disabuse this rumor," he says. "It's better than if they knew the reality."

"If you say so, Boss." But then Reno lays the backs of his fingers against Rufus's cheek, and without thinking Rufus turns his face into the touch. "Been thinkin' recently about the last time we lived in Junon."

"Is that so." Rufus kisses his Turk's fingers, and then Reno leans in for a real kiss. It's the first time they've kissed since Reno learned the truth about Veld, and Rufus can taste the difference, feel it in the softness of Reno's lips. There's an eagerness here that was missing before, a gentleness that Rufus had almost forgotten. He moans a little into the Turk's mouth, and Reno moves closer, slides a hand into Rufus's coat, then down Rufus's chest and belly and over his groin.

The intimate touch wakes Rufus's body, and he soon has Reno on his lap, their mouths connected as Reno opens Rufus's clothes. But when his tie is off and his collar unbuttoned, Rufus can feel the wetness at his neck, and he's suddenly so disgusted with himself he can't stand it. He pulls his mouth away, and lays a hand on Reno's chest.

"You okay?" asks Reno, not sounding too concerned at that point, although that changes when Rufus pushes him back. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing," says Rufus. He quickly buttons his collar back up. Reno is still on his lap so he just turns away.

Reno figures it out, and lays a hand on Rufus's neck, above where the mark is now re-hidden. "It's okay, yeah? It ain't contagious."

"I just don't want to right now," says Rufus, and Reno can hardly argue with that. Once Reno is off his lap, Rufus gets up and goes over to the liquor cabinet. He isn't going to get any more work done tonight, he can tell, so he might as well get some sleep.

But Reno gets up as well and takes the bottle out of Rufus's hand, sets it back on the shelf. "You don't need that," he says.

"I don't want to dream," Rufus tells him.

"It ain't good for you t'get drunk every night."

"It makes no difference. I'm dying anyway."

So Reno just watches helplessly as Rufus takes the bottle back out of the liquor cabinet and knocks back a swig. The liquor burns its way down his throat and settles warmly in his stomach.

What will happen to the company when Rufus is gone, he suddenly wonders. He has no children, no obvious heir. Who will take over? He should probably put some thought into this sooner or later. Rufus takes another drink of bourbon.

"What will you do when I'm dead?" he asks Reno.

Reno doesn't respond, and when Rufus turns around the Turk looks stricken. "What will you do?" asks Rufus again.

"I'll cry, I reckon," says Reno eventually.

"After that, I mean. The company is falling apart already. It will probably go to pieces at the same time I do. What will you do when Shinra is gone and I'm dead?"

"Sir, that's a damned long time in the future."

Rufus slides his sleeve up to expose the stigma mark on his left wrist. "Maybe not that long."

"It's long enough." Reno looks away from the mark. "Everyone's workin' on this, y'gotta know that."

"We need to be realistic," says Rufus, and when Reno starts to object he raises his voice. "We need to be realistic. We need to plan for contingencies."

Reno straightens up. "Not that one, sir. All due respect an' all. Not that one."

Clearly, Reno is the wrong Turk to have this conversation. Rufus should have waited and brought it up with Tseng. Tseng is practical; Tseng will understand. "All right," says Rufus, and he downs another slug of whiskey.

* * *

The study of planet life is, to Rufus, something like the study of fairy tales, but the more Elder Hargo talks about it, the more reasonable the fairy tale becomes.

The entire model is internally consistent, and has a simple elegance that is difficult to deny. The Lifestream flows in vast rivers and oceans beneath the earth, but small amounts suffuse the soil and the water, supporting and being supported by the great churn of life. Neither alive nor dead, the Lifestream is somehow both, existing in the space between. Everything that has ever lived exists in some way within the Lifestream, and everything that will ever live springs from it. Mako reactors, by destroying Lifestream to create power, drain the reserves in the earth and sap the world of its liminal energy. Hargo says that one could try seeding the land around Midgar with the tiny animals in living soil, but that they would wither away, just like the plants they support.

"What about humans?" asks Rufus. "I don't recall there being an abnormal amount of sickness atop the plate. Under the plate, sure, but that land was polluted. What about the people who lived on the plate? Why didn't they wither away?"

"Well," says Hargo, "I'm not the expert Bugenhagen was, but I expect there was enough life energy leaking out of the reactors to support those on the plate. Close enough to the leakage, I'm sure there was enough to even grow plants. Farther away ... not so much."

It explains the wastelands around Midgar, and the misery in which the slum-dwellers lived, too far from the reactors to get the backwash glow of burning Lifestream. Rufus wonders if the birth rate in the slums had been abnormally low.

He still doesn't want to believe it. He doesn't want to believe that AVALANCHE was right about anything. But it's harder and harder to not believe it as Hargo describes an interconnected world of life and breath and death.

Rufus has lived his entire life in wealth and luxury because of Mako energy. He starts to wonder if he's clinging to disbelief simply because it's going to be difficult to give that up.

* * *

There comes a day when Rufus is conducting a conference call with the department directors and a needle of pain goes through his throat. He ignores it, and it dulls down to a throb, and then sharpens again and stabs him.

Hardaway is busy describing the third quarter revenues when Rufus claps a hand to his neck, feels fluid seeping through his collar, and has to cut her off. "Excuse me," he tells the other people on the line. His voice is strained, and he works to keep it even. "Something just came up, let's reschedule for tomorrow. Talk ... t-talk to my secretary." He then hangs up before any of them can say anything.

It's intensely painful, and Rufus is doubled over in his chair before long, gripping the mark on his neck with both hands. There is no one in the suite with him, no one to hear as he moans and cries out with the stabbing agony of it. All the muscles in his neck cramp and crawl, and it feels like a thousand acid needles are piercing the stigma mark. Nothing he does helps, so he winds up just helplessly gripping his throat as moisture soaks into his collar and tie under his fingers.

_Great Gaia_ it hurts. Rufus has had worse in his life, but not by much, and it just goes on and on. He can't breathe at one point, it hurts so badly, but then after that it starts to ease, and gradually the pain fades down to a prickling tingle. Rufus stays as he is, hunched over, both hands on his throat, for several more minutes, catching his breath.

Eventually he realizes that the pain isn't going to come back, at least not yet, and he has slimy crud between his skin and his collar, so he gets up and goes over to the bathroom to clean it off. The mirror reveals the extent of the leakage; there is a grayish stain clearly visible on the neck of his shirt where the fluid soaked through, a patch like grime about the size of his hand. It disgusts him, utterly, and he quickly strips off his shirt and cleans his neck with soap and water.

The stigma mark there is bigger, he thinks, and darker, no longer a faint bruise-like smudge. It looks like someone has rubbed ash into his throat with two fingers, and the place prickles under his touch. The rot is spreading, inevitably, inexorably. Unstoppable. Rufus lays a hand over the mark to conceal it.

"No," he tells the mirror. "This isn't going to beat me." But he has a hard time believing it.


	16. Healen

It's an accident of timing. Rufus has just discovered a dark spot on his left temple, and he's in the bathroom quietly panicking over the possibility of it crawling over his face; part of him knows that this is ridiculous, his looks are ultimately unimportant, but he can't quite get his emotions under control.

Tseng is here to check if he needs anything, and finds him there in front of the mirror; their eyes meet through their reflections, and Rufus knows that Tseng knows. Rufus quickly cleans up his expression, but it's too late.

An awkward moment, and then Tseng says, "President Shinra ..."

Rufus straightens and tugs on his clothes to straighten them, too, and turns to face his subordinate. The panic is still there inside him, roiling in his belly, but the fiction that he has things under control is important. "Is there a reason you're looking for me?"

His voice isn't quite steady enough. Tseng takes a step forward. "President Shinra," he says, and then words seem to fail him.

Tseng is in the doorway now, sort of blocking Rufus's way out, and Rufus isn't in the right mental place to tell him to move. The hotel's bathroom is big enough, but Rufus feels very trapped, and he doesn't have anywhere to retreat except to lean back against the vanity. It feels unreal, having Tseng here when he's just found another place of rot growing in his body; such moments of revulsion at oneself should be private, not observed.

That's when the stigma on Rufus's leg chooses to send a slice of agony through his thigh, and Rufus falls against the vanity as his leg collapses under him. All thoughts of Tseng leave him, and all sense of unreality is wiped away; there's nothing more real than the intense, piercing pain of the geostigma. Rufus stifles a cry, sliding down the vanity to the floor as he clutches and claws at the pain in his leg, the agony that stabs up his thigh and into his groin and rips great pieces out of his nerves.

It lasts for ... Rufus has no idea how long it lasts, but when the pain finally begins to subside he's half-kneeling, curled up around the pain, with Tseng kneeling next to him and saying something quiet that Rufus can't understand. Rufus pushes him away ... as humiliating as it was to be observed in a panic, it's a hundred times worse to be observed like this. He tries to sit up, but he's too wrung out from the stigma attack to really get that underway; he's shaking violently, all his muscles still reacting to the receding pain. He runs a hand over his face, and finds his skin damp with sweat. "No," he says, his voice trembling, and he isn't even sure what he's denying.

"It's all right," says Tseng quietly.

No, it isn't. It's so far from all right that Rufus has no words for how not-all-right it is. He tries again to sit up, and Tseng figures out what he wants and helps him.

It's degrading to be sitting like this on the bathroom floor, but Rufus is sure he can't stand yet. "I'm sorry," he says, trying to regain control of the narrative of what just happened. "I can't tell when it's about to hit me."

"I know, sir."

There's wetness between Rufus's leg and his pants, the horrible residue of the stigma; he can feel the hot fluid starting to cool under his hand. "I hate this, Tseng," says Rufus quietly, before he can stop himself, and then to cover that admission he says, "Help me, would you? I need to clean this off."

Tseng does help him cross the bathroom, and gets him seated on the edge of the tub. Then the Turk stands with his eyes politely averted as Rufus struggles out of his pants and runs some water to clean the gray crud off his leg.

It's so stupid, so ridiculous, all of it, that Rufus starts to laugh that mad laugh that is never very far from his lips. He eventually manages to stifle it, and thinks he can probably walk now. "Help me up."

There's no cure; although the treatments he's getting seem to be slowing it, the stigma is still growing. There's no cure. That's why, when Tseng is assisting Rufus to his feet, Rufus turns and presses his lips against the Turk's.

Tseng mumbles something surprised, and lays his hands on the President's arms as though he is going to push Rufus away, although ultimately he does not. He barely responds at first, and Rufus is about to pull away with an angry word when Tseng makes a soft sound and parts his lips for Rufus's tongue.

There are no words for a while after that. None are necessary. Tseng kisses like he kills: directly, with purpose, no fuss. By unspoken mutual accord they turn so that Rufus's back is to the wall, and Tseng leans against him with his hands on the wall on either side of the President's head.

Were this happening with Reno, things would quickly escalate, but Tseng seems inclined to simply kiss and Rufus doesn't care. He's drowning in Tseng's mouth, aware of nothing but the taste of Tseng and the feel of Tseng's body against his own. He runs his hands up Tseng's body under his jacket, and the Turk leans a little closer, pressing against Rufus and letting Rufus feel hardness against his hip.

The erection answers so many questions for Rufus, so many, but presently Tseng draws back a touch and breaks the kiss. "Mr. President ..." he whispers.

"I want you," Rufus tells him. "I've always wanted you."

"We can't."

Rufus knows that, but he slides his hands down Tseng's sides, memorizing the shape of the man's body. "I've always wanted you," he says again. "Do you want me?"

Tseng does not reply, instead pulling back a little more and saying, "You should get dressed."

Yes, Rufus should not be standing here in his boxers with a raging hard-on. He lets Tseng go, slowly, reluctantly. He can still taste Tseng's lips. "I want you," he says, yet again.

"I know, sir."

* * *

Rufus can't get drunk enough that night to sleep. When he closes his eyes, he can feel Tseng's body, taste the Turk's lips. The alcohol sends him into a vague stupor where time passes at a different rate than normal, but whether it is faster or slower is not something Rufus can discern. He masturbates languidly, and never quite reaches orgasm.

The next day is a treatment day. The doctor has a new idea, to inject one of the therapeutic drugs directly into the lesions. Rufus is fine with trying it; he'll try anything. At first there seems to be no ill effect, but later, an hour after the doctor is gone, Rufus is on his hands and knees with every muscle in his body screaming as the stigma spasms, wishing he could will himself to die.

Elena comes to deliver her report on that organization in Edge and discovers him. She's tactful enough to make a retreat before Rufus notices her, because she knows he wouldn't want anyone to see him like that, but the image of him nearly fetal on the floor is burned into her retinas. She stands guard at the door of the Presidential suite ready to turn back any potential visitors, but part of her wants to rush back in there and ... and something, she isn't sure what. She can't stop thinking about the unrestrained suffering in Rufus's voice, the way he's half-curled up on his knees. She has to put a hand to her mouth to keep her own emotions in check.

She waits a few hours before she looks in on him again, and when she does he's upright and is wearing clean clothes as though nothing were wrong earlier. He has no idea that she saw him before and so he has no trouble facing her. She delivers her report.

The unknown organization in Edge is not a company, exactly, but more like a nonprofit organization. It operates on volunteers and a shoestring budget. Tseng didn't like it and ordered a deeper investigation, and Elena has found ...

"Reeve." The name is like a dagger on Rufus's tongue.

"I haven't seen him yet," says Elena. "But I'm certain it's him. Do you want him assassinated?" Through her crisp professionalism, she sounds eager for permission to do it.

Rufus says he needs to think about it, and over the next few hours it's all he can think about. If he decides to have Reeve removed, he'll send Reno and Rude to do it; Tseng is too clean and efficient, and Elena too inexperienced. Rufus spends hours imagining what Reno would do to Reeve if he were unleashed.

By the next day, Rufus knows he can't have Reeve killed. The Shinra Corporation is too busy working on the geostigma at this point, and can no longer make deadlines in Edge. Reeve's nonprofit is needed if Edge is to be completed at all, let alone on a competent schedule. But Rufus comes to a better fate for Reeve before he calls for Elena.

She visibly has a hard time believing it. "We're what?"

"We're going to give Reeve some money," says Rufus again. "Or, rather, you're going to do it, quietly, so that he doesn't know who is giving it to him."

"But ... but sir ..." Elena doesn't know well enough to not argue, but Rufus likes her so he lets it slide.

"No buts," he tells her, and then he smiles. "Trust me, please."

Elena half-bows. "Of course I trust you, Mr. President." She leaves without further argument to withdraw some cash.

Reno is disappointed when he finds out about Reeve. "Figured you'd want me t'disappear him," says the red-haired Turk the next day.

"I almost did." Rufus is halfway to drunk already; the stigma mark on his temple is tingling unpleasantly and he hates the sensation of it. He's trying to at least reach a point where he doesn't care, but it isn't working. The idea that he might be about to have another attack like the one he had yesterday is putting a growl of anxiety and a sour feeling in his belly.

"I want t'give him some payback, so ring me if you change your mind, yo." Then Reno says, "Sir, we have t'have a talk."

"About?" Rufus is about to pour another glass of bourbon but Reno takes the bottle out of his hands.

"This," says the Turk.

Rufus glances up at him. "You may go."

Reno sets the bottle down out of Rufus's reach. "Sir," he says. "It's four in the afternoon."

"I know that."

"It's Thursday."

Rufus knows that, too, but he can't explain why he needs the booze right now. Nobody who doesn't live with geostigma can possibly understand the sheer horror of it, the way he wants to escape his own body. Reno can never understand the kinds of dreams Rufus has when he isn't quite drunk enough when he gets to sleep. So there's no point in trying to explain it. "We're not going to talk about this," Rufus tells Reno.

Reno stands there silently for a few moments, and then says, "Elena's noticed. An' Rude. Don't think Tseng has yet, but who can tell with him."

"You were talking about me?" That's annoying, although Rufus supposes that of course they do.

"Elena's talkin' 'bout doin' an intervention."

Hmmmm. "Tell her I'll shoot her if she tries it," says Rufus, although he doubts the threat will deter her.

"I told her _I'd_ shoot her if she tries it, yeah?" says Reno. "I'm just tellin' you this so you know."

"Thank you." Rufus is done with this conversation, and gets up to go retrieve the bottle.

When Reno sets his hand down on it to keep Rufus from picking it up, something in Rufus just snaps. Maybe it's the prickling sensation in his stigma mark, or the lurking fear of another attack, the lurking _certainty_ that it's only a matter of time before another attack comes. Maybe he just wants to be good and drunk before it happens.

Maybe he's just tired of the backtalk.

Something in Rufus snaps, and he's screaming at Reno, to _shut the fuck up_ and _get the fuck out_ and any number of other profanities, until Reno backs away and says something conciliatory, Rufus catches the tone more than the words. Then he stands there shaking, thinking that he doesn't need this on top of everything else (on top of the stigma), and Reno just looks sad more than anything.

"Sir, please," says Reno, in that soothing tone that makes the words not matter so much. "Please, calm down."

But the words still matter a little bit. _"I am calm!"_ Rufus goes angrily for the liquor, splashes it around some trying to get it into a glass, and then downs it.

"You can't understand," says Rufus finally.

"No, I prob'ly can't," says Reno, and it's likely the only thing he could say that wouldn't aggravate Rufus further.

That's when a sharp pain lances through Rufus's left temple, and there's wetness there when Rufus touches the spot, and moments later he's gripping his head and trying to stifle the screams of agony that are trying to rack their way out of him as his brain attempts to claw its way out of his skull.

Reno has seen this happen to others with the stigma, and on an intellectual level he knew that it must be happening to Rufus, too, but actually seeing it in front of him rips his heart right out of his chest. He doesn't even think; he pulls Rufus down, sits on the carpet, and just holds his employer and his lover as the stigma rips through him and Rufus makes sounds that Reno never thought he'd ever hear a Shinra make. The fluid that leaks out of Rufus's hair is disgusting: sticky and slimy, and the same gray as decaying flesh although it thankfully doesn't smell that way. Rufus shakes and writhes and tries to ram his head into the floor.

It's Reno's instinct to call for the doctor, but he doesn't want to leave Rufus, and after a few minutes it becomes clear that the attack is easing. Rufus's breathing begins to even out, and his muscles, held tense and hard by the pain, start to relax even if only slightly. Reno whispers meaningless reassurances and rubs Rufus's shoulder and wonders if he ought to suggest finding if there is some kind of painkiller Rufus can take, only to immediately reconsider that; with his luck, Rufus would wind up hooked on it.

Finally Rufus moans, and it's not a moan of pain but of the memory of pain, and Reno helps him sit up.

"Let's getcha cleaned up," says Reno, and he's surprised by how steady his own voice is. He wants to kiss Rufus and just hold him; instead he runs a hand through the grime now staining Rufus's ash-gold hair. "Y'know, y'maybe ought t'start wrappin' this up."

"Maybe." Rufus's voice is weak and thready. Reno goes to get a washcloth to clean out the worst of the fluid, although only shampoo is going to get all of it out.

Rufus feels like he's been cuffed in the head by a giant paw, but he's still intoxicated and he tells himself that that helps. When Reno returns with a wet cloth he leans against the Turk and lets Reno clean his hair, then remains there with closed eyes.

So now Tseng _and_ Reno have seen him have an attack, and Rufus can barely stand it but there's nothing to be done. It was only a matter of time anyway, really. He's getting an attack every other day or so by this point, and the Turks are in and out so often that it was inevitable.

"I get it," says Reno eventually. "You think it don't matter, 'cause of the disease. I know. But it matters."

"I don't want to have this conversation," Rufus tells him tiredly. "Not now." Not ever.

"I know." Reno tosses the soiled cloth aside and runs his fingers through Rufus's wet hair. "I hate seein' you drunk all the time."

Rufus kind of hates having to _be_ drunk all the time, but trying to sleep without the liquor ... "I don't want to have this conversation," he says again, and tries to put as much finality behind those words as he can.

Reno hears it, and says only, "All right." When Rufus is ready to stand up Reno assists him, and he goes into the bathroom to finish washing out his hair.

* * *

Reno is right about many things, but to Rufus's mind he's mainly right about wrapping up the stigma marks. Reno has more experience with what people outside the Presidential suite are doing about their geostigma, and Rufus takes the suggestion to heart. He acquires long strips of cloth, and he uses them to bind pads of gauze against the marks to be the first line of defense when they ooze fluid. It saves his clothes a few times.

Elena delivers Rufus's "gift" to Reeve through an intermediary, and it is accepted with no questions asked, not even who is behind it. Over the next few months, Rufus will gradually shoulder more and more of the organization's funding. When it comes to him that Reeve is calling his nonprofit the World Regenesis Organization, Rufus sneers but sends no word about his opinion. He drips out cash in predictable installments, letting Reeve become dependent upon it, never providing so much that it becomes obvious that only the Shinra Corporation has that much funding available.

After due reflection, Rufus does try to scale back his alcohol intake, if only to keep Elena from committing suicide by President. He doesn't drink in the afternoon anymore, and experiments with going entire days without booze. He dreams of blood, of pain, of breaking apart and finding that he's rotted all through the inside, and, once, of drifting Mako floating midair. So that experiment quickly ends.

People start wanting to see him. Hardaway is first, then Kyter, later Hobbes, trying to make appointments to _see_ him rather than just hearing his voice over a telephone. Rufus has his secretary deflect all attempts, but Kyter one day just shows up at the Presidential suite unannounced and Rude must show him out.

"I have a right to see the President!" Kyter yells, until Rude reminds him who has rights here and who doesn't by forcing him back out the door.

Rufus, sitting in his wheelchair while Rude takes care of the problem at the door, realizes that this is untenable. The executives must think that the Turks are keeping him isolated, and probably controlling him, and that can't be helped; what can be helped is that everyone knows he's an easy car ride away and can drop by whenever.

"I need to move," Rufus tells Rude, after Kyter has been successfully repelled. "I can't stay here any longer."

"Where do you want to go?" asks Rude.

"I don't know yet." Rufus puts some thought into it. Where would be an ideal place to go?

Nothing comes to mind, even after he's thought about it for a day. He'd prefer to be somewhere out of the way, not a city, maybe a village, but somewhere with good medical care and a good communication system. He makes a mental list of places and discards them all in turn as inadequate, which means he will have to create this ideal locale.

Rufus calls Tseng and asks him for suggestions; Tseng has an immediate location in mind. "The Cliff Resort," he says. "It's not far from Midgar ... Edge. There's a good cellular transmission network there, and it could be converted for medical care. It's on the market right now."

"Buy it," says Rufus, trusting his Turk's judgment.

He is not disappointed. He is flown out of Junon under the cover of darkness, crosses the mountains, and sees the resort's lights glowing like a series of lanterns in the night as the chopper approaches. The morning brings another view, of trees growing from stepped cliffs, thick vegetation and gray rock, and a slow waterfall spilling down the stones. There is mist and later there is sunlight. Something stills inside Rufus when he looks out the window. _This would be a good place to die._

Settled into the mountainside, the Cliff Resort is easily accessible from Junon only by helicopter, and Rufus will simply ensure that no helicopters are available to the executives in town. Going around the mountains isn't arduous, exactly, but it's a long enough journey that it can't be a day trip to come visit him. He feels secure that the executives in Junon won't be inclined to stop by anymore. The Turks arrange for a computer connection to the new mainframe in Junon.

Rufus has his doctor and all of the doctor's nurses and assistants moved to the resort and ensures that choppers are available to _them_ so that they can ship in equipment and set up a proper medical lab here. It's convenient in a way the Presidential suite at the Junon hotel was not; the doctor's lab can be, and is, only steps away from Rufus at any time. The cabin suite in which Rufus installs himself also comes with some luxuries that the Junon hotel did not: a jacuzzi in the back, a balcony that overlooks the wooded cliff, total silence when Rufus wants it.

A more bittersweet feature is a view of Midgar on the horizon. The broken hulk of the Shinra Tower is clearly visible, as is the long smear of the Mako Cannon. From this distance the damage isn't readily apparent, but Rufus knows. The memory of his visit to the shattered city is written across his vision whenever he looks that direction.

Three days after his arrival at the resort, in the morning, Rufus is in bed late following a particularly bad stigma attack that kept him up much of the night, while Rude sits in a chair on the other side of the room, watching over him; the Turks no longer leave him alone. Rufus has a telephone meeting with Hobbes later that morning, but he remembers long conversations with Rude during his confinement, about literature and about philosophy, and it seems only natural to start a new conversation about something that is now much closer.

"Have you talked at all with Elder Hargo?" asks Rufus. Hargo has also been relocated to the resort, although Rufus hasn't seen him yet since the move.

"Some," says Rude.

"About the Lifestream?"

"Some," says Rude again.

"What do you think of it?"

Rude is silent, and when Rufus glances that way the Turk looks somewhat uncomfortable. "It's okay," Rufus assures him. "I want to hear it."

"Mako is the heart of the Shinra Corporation," says Rude slowly.

"But you believe Hargo."

The Turk shifts in his chair. "He's easy to believe."

"He definitely believes it himself." Hargo's belief gives him a conviction and a certainty that make it difficult to deny his worldview.

"If it's true, even only partly, sir ... Shinra would owe a great debt to a great many."

That thought has not escaped Rufus, but he doesn't want to talk about that quite yet. Instead, he says, "Hargo does not think the geostigma originates with the Lifestream."

"He told me."

"Has he told you anything about how he _does_ think it came about?"

"No, sir."

Then Rufus finally gets to what he wants to ask, although it takes him a few moments of silence before he can do it. "Rude ... do _you_ think this disease is a punishment?"

It genuinely matters to Rufus what Rude thinks about this, so it is a relief when the Turk immediately shakes his head. "No. Many people have it who have done nothing to the planet. If it is a punishment, it is an unfair one. Many of the victims are children. At least half."

This is new information. Rufus sits up, gathers the bedclothes around his waist, and says, "Hobbes hasn't mentioned that."

"It's true. Reeve has built a hospital just for children in Edge, and is building another." With Rufus's money, goes unsaid.

Is Hobbes withholding information, Rufus wonders, and if so, how much? This could have been an accidental omission, except that Rufus has told Hobbes that he wants _all_ data, no matter how apparently insignificant. It seems impossible that Hobbes hasn't noticed this thing about the children.

Rufus has to remind himself that Hobbes is a career Shinra employee, with all that implies. He's originally from Space Development, and who knows what kind of opinion he formed of Rufus prior to Meteorfall. "I see," says Rufus, and he lays back down. "Thank you."

He does not mention this to Hobbes in the phone meeting later that morning (he takes the meeting in his bedroom, half-dressed). Instead he calls for the doctor afterward to ask for, so to speak, a second opinion.

"I'd like you to start doing active research into the geostigma," he tells her, and she's taken aback at the idea. "Not just treatments, but what causes it as well."

"I'm not a researcher," she tells him.

"We can hire some researchers if you need them."

"There's no one here to research." She gestures, her arms taking in the room and the empty resort around them. "I'd need subjects, more than just you, Mr. President."

"We'll make this a sanatorium," says Rufus. "We'll invite subjects." When she still hesitates, he adds, "It's not just my life at stake here. What about the children?"

The doctor flusters a bit more, but Rufus promises her more money for her new responsibilities and whatever resources she thinks she needs and after thinking it over for a bit she agrees.

* * *

The doctor believes that the direct injections into Rufus's stigma marks are having a positive therapeutic effect in slowing the spread of the disease. She continues them, and Rufus lets her. She is never present two hours later when the stigma spasms under the assault.

Most of the time, the pain wearies Rufus. He can have an attack at any hour and under any circumstances; the ones he gets after a treatment are only the most predictable, but not even the worst ones. For a while he lives in a constant state of low-level anxiety about them, fearing the next one, knowing that it is inevitable. That's unsustainable, though, and eventually he slips into a calmer equilibrium, where he just accepts that he's going to be in suicidal levels of pain periodically and there's nothing he can do about it.

Slowly, the stigma spreads. The spot on Rufus's right arm turns out to be the most malignant, although it was the most inconspicuous at first and it doesn't give him an attack at all for months. One day the doctor checks it and it has grown, and after that nothing can stop it. The gray rot creeps up to Rufus's shoulder, and down to his elbow, then to his forearm.

The mark on Rufus's leg does not visibly spread at all, but the pain tells a different story. The stigma is burrowing into him there, going for the long bone in his thigh. The one on his left wrist does something similar, wrapping his wrist and then digging in. An ache grows in Rufus's bones, and it's painful now to walk. His left wrist feels like it's been broken and forcibly healed one last time.

With each tiny increasing increment of pain, Rufus withdraws a tiny bit more from the company his father worked so hard to build. Hobbes has interesting things to report sometimes, about his theories on the causative agent of the geostigma, but as Rufus becomes more and more certain that no cure will be found in time, he becomes less and less interested in what Hobbes has to say.

Most of the time, the pain wearies Rufus. Sometimes it instead makes him furious, and he flies into an incoherent rage. Things get broken, and whichever Turk is with him will keep an inconspicuous distance while Rufus destroys whatever is in reach.

* * *

The Turks have done all that they can to hold Shinra together, but they realize that if Rufus has lost interest in the company, the company will lose interest in Rufus and there is nothing they can do about that. Tseng keeps two Turks at the resort at all times for security, because the doctor has taken Rufus at his word and has invited in children as her research subjects. The place is now overrun with them and their parents.

Rufus is kept apart from them, mostly, staying in the top room of the resort overlooking the waterfall. From his balcony he can see them playing, and can occasionally hear them laughing ... or screaming, when the stigma attacks.

One day, the doctor asks Rufus to come to her lab and peer through her microscope. Rufus does, and sees ... something queer, like amoebae in water, crawling.

"What is it?" he asks, and is astounded when he's told that it's geostigma.

The doctor isolated the creeping cells from biopsies she took from some of the children here. She believes that this is the causative agent, the source of the stigma. The cells don't seem to be human, and she thinks the stigma is the body's reaction to the invasion; she has no explanation for why it isn't contagious, because it's clearly an infection.

"I think I could probably induce an infection by injecting some of these cells into someone," she says. "But they don't otherwise seem to spread, by physical contact or any other way."

Her phrasing makes Rufus uneasy, and he isn't quite sure why at first. He has no idea why Hobbes hasn't already discovered and reported this; it has taken only two months for his personal doctor to uncover this secret of the stigma through normal medical means.

Once he has thanked the doctor and returned to his rooms, he asks Elena to find Tseng and send him up, and also to find his laptop and bring it to him. Rufus had seen enough reports out the Science Department during his tenure for his memory to tease him now at the sight of those cells squirming under the microscope.

Tseng brings the laptop, and seems interested that Rufus is interested in something, but Rufus has no time for him just now. "I need a connection to Junon," Rufus tells him, because it only takes a few switches on the server rack to make that happen but Rufus has no clue which ones. Tseng connects the servers to Junon, and Rufus logs in so he can search the old records from Hojo's department.

It takes him only minutes to find what he's looking for. He turns the laptop around so Tseng can see the still image there, of clustered cells.

"Jenova," says Tseng immediately.

"Geostigma," says Rufus. He leans back and turns the laptop around so he can look at the picture again. He's quite sure; the cells in the image are all different shapes, captured by the camera while trying to crawl. "I was never injected with Jenova. How did it get into me?"

Tseng has no answer; he looks stunned at the very idea that Jenova is the cause of the stigma. "Mr. President," he says finally, but just tapers off after that.

"This is going to kill me, Tseng," Rufus says, and this is one of the days when he's just tired out by that knowledge. "There might be only a few cells, but there's no way to get them out of me. You know how they react. If we tried to cut them out, they'd just squirm deeper."

"Sir," says Tseng, but he still seems to have no words.

"I just want to know how they got into me. And how they got into all the others." He looks up at his Turk, wanting and wishing he could kiss that look off the man's face. "Why hasn't Hobbes reported any of this? Is he incompetent? Is his whole staff incompetent?"

Tseng shakes his head a little. "I'll find out, sir."

Hobbes has been trying to make appointments to see Rufus. "Yes," says Rufus. "Bring him here, and we'll find out."

* * *

Six hours later, Rufus is seated in his wheelchair with his collar tightly buttoned around the stigma on his neck, turned so that the streak of gray on his left temple is not visible, not watching as Hobbes begs pitifully for his life.

Reno is the most visibly angry, and the one who breaks three of Hobbes' fingers. He doesn't do it to get Hobbes talking, because Hobbes starts talking the instant he's dragged in front of Rufus by two of the Turks and the other two Turks are already there. Reno does it because he's so furious and he can't help himself, and the wet sound of bones and joints snapping as Reno rams his mag-rod down onto them just slides off Rufus and leaves him peacefully still.

Hobbes screams after his fingers are broken, not the way Rufus screams when the stigma is bad, or the way the children scream when their infections attack them, no, nothing could be quite like that. No, he screams like a man who is in pain and in fear of his life, which isn't the same at all. He babbles about the geostigma and about Jenova and about how he was just waiting for verification, and it's all so much noise to Rufus.

"Be quiet," Rufus says, and Rude grabs Hobbes to restrain him as Reno puts his hands over the man's mouth and nose to smother him until he's quiet. Hobbes has already admitted that he's known for months that this thing is Jenova, but he hasn't yet admitted what he's been doing with that knowledge. "I want a full report now," Rufus tells him. "A _full_ report." Hobbes is spluttering for air, so Rufus waves a hand to get Rude and Reno to let the man go and throw him down.

"Mr. President," Hobbes gasps when he can, "I swear, I never did anything against you!"

"You've kept secrets from me," says Rufus. "Important ones." He's still turned sideways, only watching what is happening in his peripheral vision; Elena has just put her foot down on Hobbes' back, kicking him to the floor. "I can't abide secrets, Hobbes."

With a little more prodding, Hobbes talks. The staff of his new department know all about Jenova, of course, and identified the traces in the wounds of infected people within three weeks. Since that time they've been trying to recreate the process by which the infection occurs. Hobbes, pathetically, tries to claim that he was doing this so that a treatment could be more readily created, but Rufus knows that the man was thinking of it as a potential weapon.

"Have you successfully infected anyone?" asks Rufus, and Hobbes admits that no, he hasn't. Not even rubbing geostigma matter into an open wound transmits the infection. Hobbes thinks that if they had Jenova cells – pure ones – they could potentially recreate the process, but he has no idea where to find any so they've been trying to culture ones pulled from victims of the stigma.

"I can't believe you," says Elena, disgust in her tone. "I can't believe you would _deliberately ..."_

"Enough," says Rufus, and Elena cuts herself off. "You disobeyed me, Hobbes."

"It was for _you,_ Mr. President!" Hobbes blubbers. "I wanted to give you a project worthy of your father's son!"

He wanted to pick up where Hojo left off, Rufus thinks. He wanted to make his mark on the Science Department. "I can't have liars on the executive board," Rufus says. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to terminate your employment. Tseng?"

"Sir?"

"No!" Hobbes cries, but Rufus just looks idly at the floorboards by the side of the room as the Turks struggle to control the flailing man.

"Any suggestions, Boss?" asks Reno, once they have Hobbes down.

Rufus thinks. "What kind of wildlife do they have around here? It's probably hungry." Hobbes screams with terror as Rude and Reno and Elena haul him out of the room.

Tseng remains behind, and when the noises subside and are subsumed by the gentle run of water down the stones, the Turk asks, "Shall I disrupt the department further?"

"I think it's time to dissolve it," says Rufus. He touches his collar, and the prickling stigma mark under it. "An ordinary doctor is doing more good for me than however many dozen scientists are left."

"I'll make sure they cause no trouble, sir."

Rufus looks over at the Turk, then, and he remembers how it felt to kiss him, and he says, "I'm going to die of this, Tseng."

Tseng offers no answer to that; there really isn't anything to say. Rufus tells him, after a moment, "That will be all. Thank you."

* * *

Hobbes suffers a terrible helicopter accident in the forests outside Junon, is seriously injured, and is then eaten alive by wild animals. The other members of the Science Department will be invited to retire, quietly; those few who refuse will be retired forcibly.

Once Hobbes has been dealt with, Reno comes back to stand watch over Rufus while the other three Turks go to Junon to deal with Hobbes' department. Rufus is sober for once - he doesn't really intend to sleep tonight – and is standing out on the balcony looking at the moon and thinking about death. Reno is direct and to the point, walking straight out to the balcony to join Rufus and putting a hand on the President's shoulder to turn him, so that Reno can gently kiss him.

"Y'ain't gonna die," Reno whispers.

"We all die eventually," says Rufus, but the end of the last word drowns in Reno's mouth.

They go inside when Reno starts to take off Rufus's coat, their lips never parting as they undress themselves and one another. It's clumsy; jackets come off first, then shoes, then pants, then shirts are opened and Rufus is pushed down onto the bed and Reno clambers atop him. The bandages don't come off.

"How d'you want this?" Reno asks softly when he's getting Rufus out of his boxers, and Rufus doesn't really care. He's still alive and he wants to _feel_ alive; he didn't really expect this tonight, but now that Reno is here and offering, he isn't going to let it go.

"I don't care," says Rufus. Reno kisses his way down Rufus's throat and chest and down to his groin, takes Rufus's erection into his mouth, and Rufus groans in sweet agony as the Turk sucks him off. Reno's mouth is hot and wet and his _tongue_ is ... Rufus's mind goes white as he ramps quickly up to orgasm.

After he comes down a bit, he's kissing Reno and gently stroking Reno to distraction, but then he thinks that Reno seems upset tonight and Rufus wants to do something about that. So he licks his hand, strokes Reno a few more times, and then licks his hand again just to see how it tastes. Not terrible, he decides. Mostly salty from the sweat between them, a little something different but not bad.

"What're you doin'?" asks Reno hazily, and then he bites down on a cry when Rufus strokes him again with a hand now sticky with saliva.

"I want to try something," Rufus whispers.

"What's that?"

Rather than try to explain it, Rufus pushes Reno's hands away and moves down to crouch between Reno's legs.

"Gaia," Reno swears. "Sir, wait ..."

"I want to try it," says Rufus again.

Reno laughs a little, unsteadily, his breath coming fast. "Not stoppin' you exactly, just ... Be careful. Do like this, okay?" And Reno demonstrates how to cover one's teeth with one's lips, which Rufus attempts to mimic as he puts his mouth down onto Reno's hard cock.

He can tell immediately that he won't be able to throat Reno the way Reno does to him, but Reno is an uncomplaining lover and free with his hissing groans. Rufus licks and kisses and it doesn't taste bad at all, just like sweat and skin with a hint of musk, and he likes the way Reno kicks the bed with his heels as Rufus works him over. Someday, he thinks, he might want to try fucking Reno, if he lives long enough for it.

"Fuck," moans Reno, and "Dammit," and _"Gaia_ you're so fuckin' _hot,"_ and Rufus teases him and doesn't let him come. Presently Rufus's own erection stirs again, and he kisses back up Reno's body as he grows hard. Reno rolls them over to put Rufus on his back, and he mouths Rufus's nipple as he whispers, "Tell me you want me t'fuck you. Tell me you want me t'fuck you." He sounds half-out of his mind.

"I want you to fuck me," whispers Rufus, and Reno wastes no time getting the condoms out of his pants pocket to fulfil this request. Rufus is on his knees a few minutes later with his Turk inside him, rocking him toward another orgasm, and he has his head thrown back against Reno's shoulder and Reno's fingers are in his mouth. It's not the way Rufus imagined his day ending, but he won't complain; he feels very alive right now.


	17. Jenova

Somewhere in Midgar's shadow, Rufus knows, is Edge. He has not seen the city in person - only in plans and drawings - and something tells him that he never will. From his balcony, however, he can see Midgar, and somewhere there, beneath the hazy ruin, is Edge.

Rufus offers to refill Elder Hargo's teacup, but when the old man takes him up on it, it's Elena who darts in to take the teapot. "The Lifestream is not ... thank you, my dear," says the elder, taking the teacup from Elena's hand. The tea is a first-flush from Wutai; it tastes like all the brightness of spring, and there's a legend that each cup will give the drinker one more day of life. Rufus likes the legend, and drinks the tea while he can. "The Lifestream is not like water," Hargo is saying. "You can't think of it as if plants are drinking it. It's the energy of life, not the fuel for it."

The elder has been trying to explain this to Rufus for an hour now, and Rufus is thinking that this might be a waste of time after all. He can admit that some of the things his father did to people were bad. Plates, for instance, cut off sunlight and air to those who lived below them. Rufus is sure that it seemed like a good idea at the time to get folks off of the increasingly-polluted land below Midgar, but the people who weren't wealthy enough to make the move up top suffered for it. Junon is another good example of a city with a built-in undercity for the built-in underclass. These were bad things, that the old President Shinra did.

But Mako ... Rufus has seen equipment in reactors corroded by Mako. Reno's favorite way to kill people is to throw them into Mako and let it dissolve the bodies. Hell, Sephiroth was killed the first time when he fell into Mako. How could _Mako_ be the source of all life when it is so dangerous?

Elder Hargo has answers to these things, but Rufus isn't sure anymore that he's interested in them. So he's giving things one last go before sending the man home.

Right now the elder is trying to square that circle for Rufus, explaining how Mako can be both dangerous and beneficial, both the kind of thing that kills and the kind of thing that creates life. The Lifestream is liminal, and those who join it can be either lost in its flow, or not, and those who do not can sometimes be tossed up whole from the Lifestream as if tossed up from the ocean onto a beach. "It takes a strong mind to maintain cohesion in the Lifestream," says Hargo, "or so Bugenhagen always told me." Rufus wonders if the people Reno has murdered in Mako reactors were able to _maintain cohesion._

Yes, this is a waste of time. "Thank you," Rufus tells Hargo. "I believe this will be our last lesson, however. I appreciate your time, but ... other matters are becoming more pressing."

Hargo's gaze flicks to the gray mark that isn't quite hidden by the bandage around the President's head. They've never spoken about the stigma marks that have steadily spread across Rufus's flesh, but the marks have gradually become more difficult to hide and there came a point where Rufus just stopped trying. "I understand," says Hargo.

"I would appreciate it if you wouldn't mention the geostigma to anyone," Rufus continues. "It's important to me." It's unclear if Hargo will understand that this is a threat, but Rufus doesn't want to make the threat more explicit. He likes Hargo, after all. "Thank you very much for agreeing to spend this much time trying to teach ... maybe a particularly dense student."

"If it weren't for that chocobo, I never would have," says Hargo. "That chocobo loved you, Shinra. You can't be all bad if you earned that."

Later, Rufus has Elena fly Hargo home, and he remains on the balcony while afflicted children play on the rocks beneath him.

The resort has become a somewhat renowned sanatorium for children and young people with geostigma, and Rufus has had it renamed to reflect its new role; it goes by Healen Lodge now. A few of the scientists forced out of Shinra came here looking for work in the weeks after Hobbes' untimely accident, and Rufus let the doctor hire them if she felt like they would be useful. Rufus himself is all but totally secluded, with only the doctor and her assistants, and the Turks themselves, allowed to see him. And Elder Hargo, but now he's gone.

It's really impossible to disguise a Turk, but under Tseng's direction they have changed from blue suits to black, so that it is at least less obvious. They come and go, and Reno charms the children, and Rufus is never seen by anyone except as maybe a distant figure on a high balcony. The Shinra Corporation is a tattered flag now, and Mako reactors are being taken offline not out of any concern for the planet, but just because the company lacks the personnel to keep them safely operational. The story is that Reeve will step in with alternative power sources as the reactors go down, but the reality is that many places just now lack power altogether.

This is Rufus's world today: a world where even the lights cannot be kept on.

Reeve. Just the idea of Reeve makes Rufus tremble with rage. He fantasizes sometimes about having Reeve assassinated, and the fantasies are all the sweeter knowing that he could make this a reality with just a word to Tseng. Reeve is useful, however, and in a way he's necessary; there's no way to know how the WRO would get along without him, and in one sense the WRO is an arm of the Shinra Corporation.

One day, though, Reno comes in with a sour look on his face and unwelcome news. "I saw Tifa Lockhart in Edge, yo," he says. "Followed her, and who ain't dead after all? Cloud fuckin' Strife."

"Huh," says Rufus. There is no keeping Strife down, apparently. Reno has tailed Strife as well, and found five of the AVALANCHE crew, including Cid Highwind. Highwind is building a new airship, in fact, under WRO aegis, which means that Rufus is paying for it and that makes Rufus so furious he nearly destroys his laptop.

In the end, though, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because Rufus decides it doesn't matter.

The stigma rules his life. The attacks come at least once a day, sometimes more often. His right arm is covered in rot down to his fingers and up past his collarbone, and he can walk only short distances before the pain and exhaustion claim him. The mark on his temple has spread out of his hair and is closing in on his left eye; when he's not crushed by depression he's terrified that it's going to blind him. Despite the doctor's best efforts he's losing weight, and gets chilled by the slightest breeze, so he takes to wearing extra layers of clothes. As he grows more frail, he loses his stamina and his interest in sex, and when Reno comes to him, he simply sleeps in his Turk's arms. He lives in thrall to the pain that looms over him, casting its ever-present shadow and threat, and has to drink himself blind to keep away the nightmares about the invaders under his skin.

Nevertheless he is still Rufus Shinra. He showers every morning (and every afternoon or evening when the stigma strikes) and shaves and dresses with a tie. He continues to coordinate the wreckage of his company as well as he can, over the phone and through his Turks. It becomes clear over time that something of Shinra is going to survive; the home appliance and vehicular divisions are still doing fairly well, there is ample liquid cash in the accounts, and many of the investments are performing. The carnage hasn't completed yet, but once it is over the Shinra Corporation will be a smaller company, a more _normal_ kind of company, but still functional and still a power in the world.

As Shinra contracts, the WRO expands into the void. It has an army now, billed as a peacekeeping force but it's an army nevertheless. Rufus is carrying essentially all of the army's operating expenses, and he pulls on the thin string of gil to have some of the army deployed to Junon, to quell the demonstrations there and _keep_ the _peace_. The Junon reactor is the only one still at full operational capacity, and Rufus wants to keep it that way. He's also annoyed at how Edge still doesn't have full electric power yet, with all of the power running off of temporary generators, which is the most expensive and least reliable way to provide power that exists. Rufus sends a suggestion to Reeve to prioritize the power plant under construction at Edge. He wants Edge lit.

Reeve has no choice but to comply.

Rufus's final gift to Edge is a monument, a memorial to the dead of Meteorfall. He has Hardaway find an artist, arrange for it to be constructed, and then install it in the center of the city, at the central civic district and at Shinra's sole expense. Rufus doesn't get to see it himself; he sees sketches of it, and when it is later built he sees pictures, and it puts him at peace. It is beautiful, bright brass and gray marble, intended to last the ages and remind generations to come of the great calamity.

Edge will be Rufus's legacy. When he is dead and gone, Edge will endure. The people there are Rufus's people, Shinra's people, most of them refugees from Midgar. They, too, are dying of geostigma, and Rufus feels a strong connection with the city he's never seen. He hopes that someday Shinra finds a cure for the disease, and heals the people of Edge, although it will come too late for him.

* * *

Rufus has his first seizure a bit over a year after being diagnosed with the stigma. It comes from the mark on his left wrist, pain drilling into his bones and slashing across his nerves, making him want to saw off his arm and he probably would try it if he had the tools at hand. It feels like his bones are splintering with acid pouring into the breaks, the agony overwhelming, and he's huddled into a ball, curled up around the pain and biting his knee to stifle the screams ... then there is nothing, and he is waking up to Tseng's impassive face and it's hours later, well after dark now. He's been moved into his bed, cleaned up, examined while he was unconscious.

This stages the third phase of the disease, and the doctor apologizes that she's been unable to find an effective treatment that, even if it isn't a cure, would at least halt the progression. The disease's progress has been only slowed - most victims don't get the year Rufus has had - but not stopped, and she is so, so sorry. Rufus accepts her apology and sends her away; he wants to come to terms with this on his own. Tseng stays with him, though, sitting beside his bed silently, waiting.

Rufus raises his left hand, examines the stigma wrapping his wrist like a foul bracelet. "You know what Dad used to do to me when I fucked up?" he asks Tseng.

Tseng knows the generalities but not the details. "Not really, sir."

"He'd grab me by the wrist and throw me into something." Rufus demonstrates with a mock fling of his own hand. "He was right-handed so it was always my left wrist he'd grab. He broke it more times than I can count." He laughs, because there's no other reaction he could have.

"I'm sorry, sir," says Tseng, and the words are sincere. "There was nothing we could do."

"I know." Rufus lets his hands fall to the blanket over him. "This is his fault. If he hadn't been so _fucking_ obsessed with the Promised Land, he never would have ..."

There are a lot of things Rufus's father wouldn't have done if not for that. He wouldn't have been so fixated on the last Cetra, and he would have had no reason to keep Hojo around, and he wouldn't have authorized all those experiments with Jenova, and he wouldn't have built SOLDIER and Sephiroth, and he ...

Rufus is suddenly in a rage, standing, smashing his bedtable lamp against the wall, moving to _punch_ the wall, but Tseng is there grabbing Rufus by the hand to stop him from injuring himself. Rufus takes the chair in which Tseng was sitting with his free hand and throws it across the room, and he's _screaming_ with fury at the total unfairness of all of it. Rufus's father died of a sword wound, not of a creeping _disease_ that is turning Rufus's body into his enemy. The old President died in probably minutes, not by inches day by day for more than a year. It was Rufus who had to deal with Sephiroth and Meteor, problems created by his father, and it's Rufus who has to deal with geostigma, even though his father is to blame for this, too.

"It's his fault!" Rufus is yelling, _"his_ fault!" He's always cleaning up his dad's messes, and there's no justice in it. Rufus collapses to the floor, exhausted by his outburst, and Tseng goes down with him still holding his fist until Rufus yanks his hand out of Tseng's.

"I hate him," Rufus says quietly, and he rubs at the pain in his wrist, the prickling tingle and the ache in his bones. He's worn out now, so fatigued by his rage that he doesn't even want to stand up. "I hate him so much. He's fucked me over so much. I should be celebrating Sephiroth's defeat, not _dying_ in a pool of pus."

Tseng says, "There is still time. The doctor and I spoke while you were sleeping. She hasn't given up."

"She might as well." Rufus is on the verge of giving up.

"Neither have I," says Tseng, as though Rufus hadn't spoken.

Rufus struggles to his feet, with difficulty, and looks around for his pants. It's chilling him to be loitering here half-dressed. "What can _you_ do?" asks Rufus bitterly.

"I can find Jenova for you."

That's an idea that hadn't occurred to Rufus, and he eyes the Turk. "What will that accomplish?"

"The Science Department thought it might accomplish a lot," says Tseng. "We have several members here on staff."

The notion of giving some Jenova, freely, to the people who had betrayed him alongside Hobbes makes Rufus laugh. "No," he says.

"I think it would be good to do."

"Do you." Rufus finds his pants folded neatly on the other chair in the room and goes to put them on, after which he sits down in the chair to catch his breath.

Tseng points out that the scientists on staff here don't even know Rufus is in residence; they came to Healen out of a concern for the victims of geostigma. They are the ones who want to help, a self-selected group that genuinely wants to render aid. Perhaps the department as a whole couldn't be trusted, but if any individuals in the department could be, it would be the ones at Healen right now.

It's a good point. "And where do you think you would find some Jenova?" asks Rufus.

"Jenova was whole before Sephiroth," says Tseng. After that, she had been headless for the rest of her existence. Jenova's _head,_ therefore, escaped whatever happened to the rest of her while she was under Sephiroth's control, and in theory should still be available somewhere.

Since Sephiroth himself somehow relocated through the underground Mako flows to the northern crater, and he'd presumably been in possession of Jenova's head ...

"You really want to do this," says Rufus.

"Yes, sir."

Rufus thinks about it. Tseng so infrequently asks anything of him. He gazes out at the balcony, thinks about going out to look at the moon, but it's cool out at night and he's already chilled. He remembers Tseng during his captivity, threatening him as a hostage, and he remembers asking for Tseng's gun in his mouth. "One condition," says Rufus.

"Sir?"

"I want you to kiss me."

Tseng hesitates, and then crosses the room as Rufus stands. "Very well, sir."

It's not like it was the last time, when Rufus took Tseng by surprise, but more like that time in the Shinra Tower that has lingered at the edge of Rufus's daydreams. Tseng puts his hands into Rufus's hair, and he pulls Rufus so that the President falls against him, and Rufus clutches at the lapels of the Turk's coat to keep his balance. Tseng's lips are warm and so is his body, and when he lets his lips part he tastes like wetness and lust and darkness and light. Rufus rests his arms around Tseng's waist, and leans into the warmth.

"Stay with me tonight," Rufus whispers.

"Is that part of your condition?" asks Tseng, and the words are wet.

 _Yes._ It's on the tip of Rufus's tongue to say _yes,_ that Tseng is absolutely forbidden from searching after Jenova unless he complies. "No," says Rufus. "It's a request."

"Then I must ..."

Rufus quiets him with another kiss, not wanting to hear the words that are coming next. Tseng settles, content now, it seems, in the kiss.

This is all Rufus can have of him, and Rufus is dying so there will be no time later for more. The final stage of the disease is coming, the stage where the stigma leaks constantly, and his body goes into shock at the fluid loss and finally succumbs in a gruesome mess. Who knows how long it will take for Tseng to find what he wants to find? He might leave and not come back in time for Rufus to see him again. He might never find it, and might never come back.

"Stay with me," Rufus whispers again. "We don't have to have sex." Rufus doesn't think he's strong enough for that anyway. "Just stay here with me tonight."

It takes a long time for Tseng to answer that, and they kiss quietly in the interim. Rufus is getting cold, and he stands very close to Tseng to soak up the other man's heat; after a time, Tseng's hands move from Rufus's hair down his back, and pull him closer.

"All right," says Tseng at last, and he starts to unbutton Rufus's shirt.

Neither undresses completely, and the thin silk of their undergarments fabricates the story that they are merely sharing a bed, but when they lay face to face to continue the soft kiss and Rufus is able to run his hands – at last, at last – over Tseng's bare chest he thinks only of the other man's body. How it would feel to finally have that body moving against him, inside him, how it would sound to hear Tseng's voice moan only for him. He doesn't push it, however; there would be no point.

Tseng has always been there, always in Rufus's shadow, always willing to do what Rufus needed him to do. Since the days when Rufus was a small child and Tseng was seventeen, the Turk has been there, and he's there now, willing to fold Rufus into his arms and share his warmth and his strength, because that's what the dying President needs.

They go to sleep with Rufus's head on Tseng's shoulder, and Rufus has no dreams at all.

* * *

Tseng takes all of the Turks with him when he leaves for the crater. He wants to leave Reno behind, but Rufus insists that Reno go as well; all the Turks can fly, but Reno is the best pilot and the storms around the crater will need a good pilot. Then Tseng wants to leave Rude or Elena, but there will be a lot of ground to cover and there are only four Turks. Rufus will be safe enough, surrounded by sick children at the resort. _And if he isn't, it hardly matters anyway._

After they leave, Rufus and the doctor have a long discussion, about the stigma and about death. The doctor, indeed, is not ready to give up and she wants to try a different combination of magic on Rufus, and Rufus is fine with it so they go ahead. Afterward he's sitting on his balcony, having tea and shivering in the cold, and wondering if he'll ever see any of his Turks again. He has barely completed that thought when the stigma on his temple prickles, and Rufus has a moment of terror at what he knows is coming, and then the stigma stabs him in the head and he collapses out of his chair clutching at the pain. Somewhere in the resort a child is screaming through the stigma, and somewhere else in the resort Rufus is doing the same.

There is no one to check on him this time and clean him up and carry him to bed, so Rufus wakes hours later on the balcony, shivering in mortal cold with his hair sticky and disgusting under the bandages. He picks himself up; he aches everywhere, the cold soaking into his bones and stiffening them. Maybe he won't die of the stigma after all. Maybe he'll die of hypothermia instead.

Rufus drags himself to the bathroom and cleans himself off, then slides into the warm jacuzzi to get some heat into his joints. He brings whiskey with him, and has a brief moment in which he contemplates the possibility that if he gets drunk enough he might simply slide under the water and drown. Rufus isn't quite that depressed yet, but he's getting closer. He's still the most powerful man in the world, after all, but with the Turks gone no one looks after him. No one else _cares_ enough about him. He has no idea how many days they will be out, but after his discussion this afternoon he has an idea of how many days he has left.

As he sits in the warm water, still feeling somewhat chilled, he realizes that there is a dim spot in his left peripheral vision, a places where the colors are all darkened, and he thinks, _Of course,_ but also, _Holy shit._ He gets out of the jacuzzi and staggers naked over to the mirror, and yes, there, the stigma has finally spread enough to reach the corner of Rufus's eye.

He's glad there are no Turks in the building, because he needs to have a breakdown, right now, and this way there will be no witnesses. He huddles against the mirror, shaking and blinking and wishing and hoping, until he's chilled by the air on his wet skin and he has to return to the water. There he continues to quietly freak, everything screaming inside him. _He's going to go blind._ The stigma is killing him, but before it finishes the job it's going to blind him in one eye and, depending on how it spreads after this, possibly both. He's turning into more of a wreck every day.

Once he's warmed up and has himself more or less under control, he gets out of the water, dries off and dresses (and checks the mirror again just to be sure, and holy hell he's sure) and finds his PHS. He dials Elena.

 _"We're approaching Icicle Inn, sir,"_ she tells him. _"We're going to refuel there and probably spend the night depending on the weather."_ A pause, and then she asks, _"Sir, how are you?"_

"I'm all right," Rufus tells her. He's alive at least. Going blind but not dead yet.

_"I wish I'd stayed with you."_

"Tseng is going to need all of you."

_"I know, sir, but I'm worried about you."_

Rufus puts a smile into his voice. "Don't be." He's only dying.

Over the next week or so, Rufus spends less time on the balcony, because it's warmer inside and he can't know when a seizure will hit him. The dark stain spreads across the vision in his left eye. He calls the Turks daily, usually Elena because he likes her excitability; they are staying at Icicle Inn and flying into the crater each morning. The storms are variable in intensity, but Elena thinks they aren't as strong as they were back the first time they visited the area, and Reno is usually able to navigate them. The Mako geysers are gone, of course, and much of the tempest apparently went with them.

Rufus wonders how long Tseng will continue to look before he gives up, and doesn't get to find out.

He hears the chopper arrive, landing on the helipad at the top of the cliff close to dusk, and he thinks, _Tseng._ But Tseng is not on the chopper. It's Reno, and it's Rude, but not Tseng or Elena.

Something in Rufus's belly knows before Reno says anything. Something about the way Reno is holding a sealed specimen box, something about the expression on the red-haired Turk's face, something about the way Rude moves into the room. Something tells Rufus before Reno has said even one word.

"You found it," says Rufus.

"Yeah," says Reno. "We found it. An' more." He flips out his PHS, pulls up something, and hands it to Rufus.

The video is grainy, and clearly taken from Elena's PHS; why she had chosen to record the encounter and transmit it to Reno is not obvious. There is snow and there is stone, and Elena has her gun out and she fires at figures in the darkness. Then there is a close-up on Tseng's bloodied face, and the Turk is clutching his shoulder like he's been shot, and Rufus realizes he's not breathing.

"What happened?" he asks, but the video isn't finished. The figures coalesce out of apparently nothing, clothing materializing from dark tendrils crawling up their bodies, and one of them grabs Elena's PHS and speaks directly into it. _"Don't think you can hide her from us for long."_

Even through the poor video quality Rufus can see it. The green eyes glowing with Mako. The silver-gray hair. The black leather. The shape of the face is different, the voice not as deep.

It's then that it comes into focus for Rufus. The Lifestream, and everything Hargo said about it. Sephiroth refused to diffuse into it once at death, why should his second death have been any different?

"Great Gaia," Rufus whispers.

The specimen box contains what is left of Jenova's head. Rufus doesn't open the box to look at it; Reno assures him that it's half-melted and ghastly and Rufus believes him. Elena was the one to find it, and was the one to decide to send Rude and Reno off with it once the ... Sephiroth-esque creatures appeared and shot Tseng.

"Shot him," repeats Rufus. There's just too much information here for him to absorb and he isn't drunk enough for this. He crosses the room, staggers a little because his leg is particularly painful tonight, and opens a bottle of whiskey.

"Sir," says Reno, intercepting the glass before Rufus can fill it. "We need y' _sober,_ yeah?"

"Please, sir," says Rude. "What should we do?"

Rufus is about to say, furiously, that what they need to do is return to the crater and retrieve the other Turks, when his PHS rings. The caller ID on the screen reads, _Tseng._

Rufus's mouth is dry when he answers. "Tseng?"

 _"Not quite."_ The voice is not Sephiroth's. _"You would be President Shinra."_

Rufus swallows. Reno and Rude are staring at him, so he turns to put them behind him. "And you would be?"

_"Kadaj. I have something that I think belongs to you, and by coincidence you have something that belongs to me."_

"Kadaj," says Rufus, considering the word. The name is unfamiliar. "What is it that you think I have?"

_"Don't be coy. I know you have Mother."_

Fuck. Rufus glances at the specimen box on the table, and affects a casual tone. What can he tell this thing? What can he say that won't get Tseng and Elena killed? Are they even still alive? _What does this thing want with Jenova?_ "I suppose you wish to trade, then," says Rufus.

 _"I had that idea,"_ says Kadaj.

No matter what, the creature on the other end of the line cannot get its hands on Jenova. Rufus has no idea what would happen if he turned over the box to Kadaj, but it can't be good. What can he do about this? His mind races, and lights on an idea. "Then I suppose I must admit that I don't have the item you want," says Rufus, sighing a little as though regretful of the fact. "You see, we were under contract and it's already been delivered."

_"Under contract? What does that mean?"_

"It means we were retrieving it for another person, and had no idea there was a competing claim on it. I'm afraid we no longer have it."

 _"Then who_ does _have her?"_ There's no anger in Kadaj's voice, only curiosity.

There's one person who can handle Sephiroth, Rufus thinks, or whatever part of Sephiroth is in Kadaj, a person who went to the northern crater to confront Sephiroth and came out alive. "A man named Cloud Strife," says Rufus. "He operates out of ..."

 _"Cloud?"_ Kadaj interrupts. _"Our brother Cloud?"_

"I ... yes." Rufus has no idea how Kadaj knows Strife, and doesn't care. "Do you know where to find him?"

 _"We can figure it out. Of course,"_ and Kadaj's voice goes low here, closer to Sephiroth's quiet purr, _"if this turns out to be bad information, we'll figure out how to find you instead."_

* * *

Rufus and his remaining Turks hold a quick conference on what the _fuck_ they're going to do now; they can't count on Strife killing Kadaj, although that would be an ideal result.

"We need t'hide it," is Reno's opinion. Rude's is to just throw it into a Mako seep and let the Lifestream have it back, which is kind of the same thing. Rufus is on a similar page, but doesn't think that letting the Lifestream decide this is the right answer.

"I'm not letting it out of my sight," says Rufus.

"There's three of 'em," says Reno, "from what I saw. This Kadaj an' two others. If they come here ..."

They'll just take the Jenova capsule. Rufus is aware, and waves it aside. "What about Tseng and Elena?"

According to Rude, they were alive when the chopper left them, but at this point there's no telling. "I find it hard to believe you just abandoned them," says Rufus. The more he thinks about it, the more angry he becomes.

"I take respons'bility, sir," says Reno. He'd thought they were on board when he took off from the crater – Elena kept telling him to go, go - and by the time Rude made Reno understand that they _weren't_ on board it was too late. Reno circled around but couldn't spot them, and he and Rude decided the Jenova specimen was too important to risk.

"So you left them." Left Elena, left Tseng.

Reno shrugs. "I made that decision, yeah. The mission was more important."

Rufus slams his hand down on the table. "It's a giant _fuck up_ not to complete the mission _and_ not abandon other Turks!"

"Ain't denyin' that."

At least Tseng and Elena are still alive ... probably. Rufus runs a hand through his hair. "I want you to go back and find them."

Reno looks highly skeptical of this plan. "An' leave you unguarded?"

"That doesn't sound wise," says Rude.

"I don't care if it's ..." Rufus is interrupted by a sudden sharp pain in his leg. "Fuck," he says, his voice weak with fear.

He doesn't have to fear long; pain crushes through the stigma, and Rufus is caught when he starts to fall and brought over to the bed, where he curls up and clutches his leg and screams and screams.

Rude and Reno do not obey that last order before he passes out, and by the next morning when Rufus is conscious again it seems pointless to go searching for the other Turks. They've surely been moved by now; no halfway-competent hostage-taker would keep hostages in the same unsecured location where they were captured. Rufus will need to wait and see what circumstances unfold, as impotent as that makes him feel.

So, instead, he sends Reno to scout out what Strife is up to these days. Without knowing how, exactly, Rufus is nevertheless certain that Kadaj will locate Strife at some point, and it would be nice to know the situation there. Rude remains behind, just in case Kadaj carries through on his threat, although Rufus has no illusions about how well Rude would fare against a Sephiroth ... clone, or whatever Kadaj might be.

It takes Rufus some time to come to terms with what he now knows to be true, about Mako and about the Lifestream. Kadaj and his companions materialized out of nowhere, carrying Sephiroth's appearance. It's all true, Rufus has realized. The Lifestream is real, and Sephiroth is within it ... not alive, exactly, but not dead either. The Lifestream exists in that pause between death and life, and so does Sephiroth.

What does this mean, for Rufus and for Shinra? The Lifestream is real. What has Shinra been doing for these decades, powering the world with Mako energy? What kind of damage has Shinra done?

Somewhere deep inside, despite Elder Hargo's repeated reassurances, Rufus wonders if geostigma really isn't a punishment from the planet after all.

Again and again, Rufus reviews the video on Reno's PHS, telling himself that he's trying to collect information about Kadaj and his companions, but he keeps pausing it on Tseng. Injured, bleeding, his face drawn with pain. Elena was also injured somehow, her voice crying out in pain, although it's not clear what happened to her; one of Kadaj's associates has a gun of some kind, and perhaps Elena, too, was shot. Would Rufus be closely examining Elena's image for clues as to her injuries, if there were one? He doesn't know.

Eventually Rufus realizes that he just doesn't have any information about what Kadaj and his companions might be, what kind of relationship they have to Sephiroth, and what their capabilities might be. Beyond their appearance, what can be known about them? Despite his continued misgivings about the members of the old Science Department, Rufus needs some scientists right now, preferably ones with knowledge of Hojo's experiments, so he has the scientists on staff at Healen gathered up and has Rude provide them with Elena's video and what information is currently available. Rude reports that they figure out immediately that this request is coming directly from the President, and Rufus doesn't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Everyone who has ever lived exists within the Lifestream, Hargo said. What has Shinra been doing by converting Mako to electric power? Has Rufus's company been ... converting souls to electricity? Has it been destroying the dead utterly, sending them to some kind of oblivion? If so, it's too bad that Sephiroth didn't wind up on the wrong side of a Mako reactor! But how many of the world's dead have? What kind of ancient wisdom and knowledge has Shinra obliviously annihilated?

Rufus has no answers, but he suspects he will soon find out, because the stigma is still advancing and the doctor believes he will be in stage four soon.

Once Rufus has settled into the Lifestream, will he find _himself_ on the wrong side of a reactor?

Did his father?

* * *

Waiting has never been Rufus's strength, but he learned patience while in confinement. He continues to work with Hardaway on Edge projects – Shinra is constructing some office buildings, intending to lease them once they are complete, and the WRO is constructing an elevated highway to connect Edge to the ruins of Midgar – and refrains from sending Rude to harass the scientists every five minutes.

Reno returns with a flyer for Strife's business; to Rufus's surprise, the man is apparently running a courier service. Rufus would have guessed mercenary, or at least bodyguard, but apparently not. There's a phone number where Reno presumes Strife can be contacted, although Reno was unable to spot him personally. The business is registered to a bar in Edge, and Reno scoped out the place; it belongs to Tifa Lockhart. She lives there with a couple of orphans, at least one of whom has geostigma, in the later stages.

There was no sign of Kadaj while Reno was there.

After Reno finishes reporting in, he goes to rustle up the scientists, and returns with news and the news is not welcome. Kadaj, the scientists believe, is an incomplete Sephiroth clone.

"Incomplete," says Rufus.

"He's got Mako in 'im," says Reno, "obviously, from his eyes. That means he lacks only Jenova cells."

Rufus has the capsule of Jenova on a table nearby, and he glances at it. "And if he gets some?"

"Well, then, sir, he'll be complete, won't he?"

Yes, and wouldn't that be delightful? Rufus has no idea what he'll do if Sephiroth winds up resurrected. The Mako Cannon is rusted, Heidegger and Scarlet are long dead, and the only army available to Rufus is indirectly controlled through funding rather than directly with straight orders. 

Maybe he'll end up having to rely on Strife's apparently-indestructible group.

"Contact Strife," says Rufus. "Tell him we'd like to speak to him."

The number on the flyer, it turns out, goes to Lockhart. She doesn't seem alarmed to be called by Reno, and she promises to pass the message to Strife. As nervous as it makes Rufus to think about sharing a room with the man who tried to kill him once, the fact is that Strife is the most physically capable person to Rufus's knowledge, the person most likely to be able to deal with the Sephiroth clones, if that's what they are. Rufus needs to bring Strife on board, one way or another.

As to what to do with the Jenova specimen box ... well, Rufus doesn't want it anywhere near him, but he also doesn't dare let it leave his possession. He takes it with him as he moves from room to room, laying it on tables. The box is cold metal, even perhaps, to Rufus's imagination, colder than metal ought to be.

Reno walks back in when Rufus is pouring a glass of bourbon, but before he has sipped any. "Yo," says Reno. "You know what I'm goin' t'say, so don't make me say it."

"I'm under a lot of stress right now," says Rufus, lifting the glass and contemplating the caramel-gold whiskey.

"Sir," says Reno. "Please."

Rufus sets down the glass and turns to face the Turk. "What do you expect me to do?" he asks. "You have no idea what this is like." He raises his right hand, the gray stigma visible at his sleeve.

"I got an idea," says Reno. "But you're right. I don't really know." He crosses the room and carefully moves the glass a little farther away from Rufus. "What I do know is that we need y'sober."

Rufus rubs his left wrist; the stigma mark prickles under his fingers. "Sobriety is overrated," he says, but he doesn't go for the liquor.

Reno moves closer, clears his throat, and says, "How's the doc think you're doin'?"

"Hmmm," says Rufus. He contemplates giving his Turk a kind lie, but Reno deserves better. "She estimates another week or so, before the final stage. Days, after that. So, two weeks, perhaps, if I'm lucky." Or unlucky, as the case may be. "I'd actually really like to spend the rest of my life intoxicated, but you're right. I should be sober, at least right now."

That's clearly less time than Reno had expected; the expression that crosses the Turk's face is half-stunned, half-sick. "I, ah ... didn't know, sir."

Rufus picks up the glass of whiskey and examines the color of it, and then very carefully pours the liquor back into the bottle. "I'll see this through as long as I can," he says. "After that, you'll have to take over."

"I, ah ... I ..."

"I'm going to have some papers drawn up," says Rufus, "passing control of the company to the Turks after I'm gone. You'll be able to choose any CEO you prefer. It can be one of you, but it doesn't have to be." He smiles, bitter. "Maybe you can put Reeve back on the board. He's a traitor but he's reasonably competent."

"No," says Reno. "Sir, stop talkin' like this."

Rufus turns and says, "Death waits for no one."

The embrace is so abrupt and so tight that it takes Rufus entirely by surprise. He makes a move to pull away, but Reno just grips him tighter, and tucks his chin over Rufus's shoulder. "Stop talkin' like this," says the Turk, and there is a wet note to his voice. "President Shinra, y'ain't gonna die."

"Yes, I am," says Rufus. He has no idea what to do about this, so he just stands there, stiffly, as his bad leg slowly becomes more and more painful and the stigma on his right arm tingles under the pressure.

"We'll get the Jenova t'the scientists," Reno is saying. "They'll find a cure for you."

"I don't even want to open that thing." The more the Jenova bits are spread around, the easier it will be for Kadaj to get his hands on it, so that's right out. And anyway, a few short weeks isn't long enough. Rufus knows it isn't. So there's no point taking the risk.

"Y'ain't gonna die," says Reno again.

That's how Rude finds them: Rufus just standing with his hands at his sides with Reno wrapped around him. He spots Rude at the door, and he never would have thought anything could surprise the quiet man but clearly this has accomplished it. Rufus gestures with one hand to the degree he can, beckoning Rude and pleading silently to be rescued, and Rude complies, coming into the room and putting a hand on Reno's shoulder.

Reno lets go as soon as he realizes that he's being pulled away, and he quickly wipes his face but Rufus can see the moisture there. "Sorry, sir," he says. "I just ... I can't believe this."

Rufus doesn't know what to say. He really hadn't expected this kind of reaction from the red-haired Turk, but upon reflection he isn't sure what he did expect. He chooses to just say nothing about it at all, and changes the subject. "Keep watch on the road," he tells Reno, seating himself painfully into his wheelchair. "If Strife shows, I want to know it as soon as possible."

It takes a moment for Reno to respond. "Yes, sir," he says. The Turk's hand rises, as though to touch Rufus again, but then falls down to Reno's side. "Yes, sir."

After Reno leaves, Rude lingers in the door. "What did you tell him?" he asks.

"That I'm dying," says Rufus. He looks at the bottle of bourbon, wishing he could have just one glass. But no, he needs to not be impaired. "No breaking news or anything."

"Mmmm." Rude nods, and ducks out of the room.

* * *

Kadaj calls again late in the morning. He dials Rufus's number, but when Rufus sees _Tseng_ on the caller ID again, he hands the PHS to Reno. "Stall him," says Rufus, so that he has some time to think of what to say to the creature.

Reno takes the PHS and flips it open. "Yo," he says.

From Reno's end of the conversation, it is quickly apparent that Kadaj does not believe Strife has Jenova. Reno does his level best to convince the clone otherwise, but soon loses his temper and starts to yell, "Are you callin' me a liar?!" Apparently Kadaj is calling Reno exactly that, because Reno starts to splutter with fury even though, objectively, he actually is lying right now.

A few minutes later Reno puts Kadaj on hold and extends the PHS to Rufus. "He wants t'talk t'you, yeah?"

Rufus is ready. He takes the PHS, waits a few breaths, and takes Kadaj off hold. "This is President Shinra," he says.

 _"Sir,"_ says Kadaj. _"I am interested in the truth now. Our brother doesn't have Mother. I'd know."_ His voice is pleasant enough, conversational even.

"Kadaj," Rufus says, "I have no reason to lie about this ..."

_Click._

Rufus pulls the PHS away from his ear and looks at it for a moment, then hands it back to Reno. That didn't go how he'd planned at all. "Call Lockhart again," he says. "Tell her it's quite urgent that Strife make it here soon."

Strife turns up later that afternoon, riding a motorcycle with a throat so loud it can be heard before it turns off the road. Rufus decides to play up his infirmity, hoping to appear so frail and defenseless that Strife won't choose to harm him; it won't be a tough sell, although Reno insists that Rufus keep a handgun in his coat. He wraps a thin white sheet around himself and mostly over his face to conceal the extent of his stigma, and settles a blanket over his knees, with the idea that Strife might assume the disease to be even worse than it is. The Jenova specimen box is settled into Rufus's lap, under the blanket, and Rufus rests his left hand on the box.

It might be his imagination, but it seems as though the stigma mark on his wrist reacts in some way to the capsule, putting a quivery feeling into the rot.

Reno and Rude greet Strife at the door, and not in a friendly way. It's Reno's idea to test if Strife is still dangerous, still capable of handling whatever comes at him, and Strife just literally kicks Reno out the door without half trying and locks him out on the steps. Rude is arrested by a sword at his throat.

It's been almost three years since Rufus saw Strife in action, and he intercedes before Rude is gutted the way Dark Nation was. "Good," says Rufus, bringing the motorized wheelchair out into the front room. "You still fight like a SOLDIER. You've lost nothing."

Strife seems taken aback at the sight of him, and pauses a long moment before saying, "Rufus Shinra?" as though it had never occurred to him that Rufus might have been the one to call for him. He recovers his equilibrium quickly, however, turning to Rude and saying, "Do I feel sorry for you."

Rude shifts uncomfortably, and Rufus wonders if there really is something to pity in being a Turk, caring for a crippled and dying CEO. Rufus starts to explain how he survived WEAPON, but Strife isn't having it. "What do you want?" Strife asks, and "Who was that who attacked me?"

Attacked him? Something inside Rufus thrills; if Kadaj actually _attacked_ Strife, it clearly hadn't gone in Kadaj's favor because Strife looks perfectly uninjured from what Rufus can see of him.

Rufus needs Strife on his side. He raises his right hand to his face, showing the smear on the back in a deliberate display of weakness, and says, "We are in need of your assistance."

"Not interested," says Strife, and he turns as though to go.

Rufus stops him, and lays it out. He says that he understands how his company put the world into the condition it's in today, and how this means he owes the world a great debt. "Therefore," he says, "it is our responsibility to set things right."

It's the right thing to say; Strife's weight shifts and he turns back toward Rufus, listening. The great sword in his hand swings as he moves, but Strife is not threatening anyone with it anymore. "Is it," says Strife.

Rufus switches to a gentle lie then, claiming to have initiated an investigation into Sephiroth's actions as though that had been Shinra's main focus, rather than a standard disaster recovery postmortem analysis that had taken place almost two years ago. Strife was obsessed with Sephiroth. Maybe he still is. Maybe that obsession can be put to use.

"Now that the world is back on its feet," says Rufus, "what poses the greatest threat?" Strife's eyes dart down to Rufus's hand, and Rufus confirms, "That's easy. Geostigma. We have reason to believe Sephiroth is responsible." Rufus recounts the rumors: that it's Mako-sickness, that it's the fault of the Lifestream, rumors that he's more inclined to believe himself now, and possibly would if he didn't know about Jenova. However, there's no need to mention Jenova at this point, and he doesn't; instead he lays it again at the feet of Sephiroth.

"Sephiroth is dead," says Strife.

"Is he?" asks Rufus. "Is he dissolved within the Lifestream, or is his mind ... coherent?" He has Strife's attention now; it seems this sounds plausible to the man. Rufus wonders how much Strife knows about the Lifestream. Has he had a teacher, like Elder Hargo? "It's possible, isn't it?"

It's hard to read Strife's expression, because of the sheet draped over Rufus's head; Strife is listening, however, and that's all Rufus can ask at this point. "We went to look for traces of Sephiroth," says Rufus, "at the ..."

"Northern crater, yo," says Reno, from outside the door.

"And?" says Strife.

"Don't worry," says Rufus. "We didn't find anything. But we were interrupted, by Kadaj and his merry band."

"Kadaj," says Strife, musing.

Feigning some concern but not too much, Rufus advises Strife that Kadaj will probably be after him as well, due to his ties to Sephiroth. And that's what Kadaj wants, after all: a tie to Sephiroth, so that he can achieve Sephiroth's rebirth.

Strife expresses some impatience then and says, again, that he's leaving, so Rufus says, "Then allow me get to the point. We need to combat Kadaj, and to do that we need someone with your strength and expertise. We need you, in fact. As an ex-SOLDIER, won't you rejoin us?"

"That was just my imagination," says Strife, sounding almost melancholy. He turns to leave, unlocks the door, and then asks, "What's this stuff about 'Mother'?"

 _Shit._ Of course Kadaj asked after Jenova. Rufus grips the Jenova specimen box tighter, and says, "Oh? Did Kadaj mention something?"

"Rufus," says Strife, and he turns back toward the President. "If you're hiding something ..."

"I would never hide anything," says Rufus. "Not from a comrade." Then, because Strife is clearly about to leave, Rufus plays his last card. "Surely you want to learn everything you can about the stigma. If for no other reason, for the sake of the orphans with whom you live. Don't you want to put smiles back onto their faces?" Strife turns a bit, indecisive. "In the end, all we want is to rebuild our world. Won't you join us?"

It looks for a moment as though Strife is seriously considering it. He turns the rest of the way back toward the room, and Rufus raises a hand, both beckoning and inviting. He won't blame Strife if the man doesn't actually want to take Rufus's diseased hand, but the gesture is clear enough.

"I ..." begins Strife.

That's when Reno, apparently forgetting for a moment that Strife was never really a company man, makes an inane suggestion that Strife could help to rebuild Shinra. Strife says something disgusted, and storms back out the door.


End file.
